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If England got to the final


Lermon

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If I ever get to see England in the final of anything, I will dye my hair red and white, wear a St. George's clad shirt with a St. George's clad pair of white trousers. I will wear a pair of odd trainers, one red, one white. I would paint my face with the flag of St. George and I will wrap myself in the biggest St George's flag I can find.

I will then lock myself in my living room, away from everyone. Sing the national anthem with my hand across my heart before bleating out endless choruses of 3 LIONS ON MY SHIRT! If we score, I will scream the insides out of my lungs out of my face. If they score I will break something made of glass so i can witness it mimicking the shattering of my heart.

I don't know if I'd care if we lost much, I'd pat myself on the back and acknowledge we did the best we could. If we made the final, i'd be a very very ****ing happy bunny!

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