Jump to content

The toilet seat press conference


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 201
  • Created
  • Last Reply

I've got tears in my eyes reading this!!

Conversation with one of my daughters:

Me: Get in there!! <punches the air a few times> I knew you'd do well. You've earnt your wages today

Daughter: Its only a game Dad, why do you get so carried away all the time.

Me: Its more than a game son, its football

Daughter: I'm a girl Dad, not a boy

Me: Never mind son, never mind

Link to post
Share on other sites

How about the Mrs :D

Uhh .. :D

Those long hairs equipped bodies ?

I have always thought about them in terms of 90-60-90 centimeters values...also in terms of 80-65-95 sometimes ..yes, maybe even less I can't exactly recall right now :D

Link to post
Share on other sites

Sometimes, recently, I tend to think about my friends in terms of attributes, Flair 12, Influence 12, Bravery 8 ... etc...

Is this bad as well ?

Nope

Uhh .. :D

Those long hairs equipped bodies ?

I have always thought about them in terms of 90-60-90 centimeters values...also in terms of 80-65-95 sometimes ..yes, maybe even less I can't exactly recall right now :-D

Flair, stamina and creativity?

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've got tears in my eyes reading this!!

Conversation with one of my daughters:

Me: Get in there!! <punches the air a few times> I knew you'd do well. You've earnt your wages today

Daughter: Its only a game Dad, why do you get so carried away all the time.

Me: Its more than a game son, its football

Daughter: I'm a girl Dad, not a boy

Me: Never mind son, never mind

That had me in tears LMFAO!

Link to post
Share on other sites

My best tactical moments come on the pan

I hold on for <just one more match> then press pause and leg it up stairs

A few moments calm, a bit of paperwork and my tactical approach is clear. Bless that pause button :D

Link to post
Share on other sites

i watch the highlights on "key highlights" so and the match speed is quite quick so i cant commentate (i do my own commentary when playing pro evo though)

Another thing that is very similar, but hasnt been mentioned, is interviews with the fanzine. I always like doing them as they are much more informal and you can have a playful dig at your players, whilst praising the fans and making them think you are a great lad as you are happy to give up so much of your time to speak to them. The fanzine interviews almost always start with "first off, we'd just like to thank you for taking the time out to speak to us", to which i reply "its an absolute pleasure, honestly, its no bother at all, i am delighted to get this chance to put my thoughts across to our great hardcore support". The fanzine interviewers are a lot more respectful, as they are in awe of me and are delighted that i am speaking to them, so i like to do the interviews with them when i go to bed as it is more relaxing. The press conferences with the hard nosed journalists are done on the toilet or in the shower

I'm a useless manager so havent managed to get a successful career going yet on FM09 (i could manage it if i started at a big club but that always seems like cheating as i want to start with automatic reputation at a blue square or league 2 club and be delighted when man utd or barcelona offer me the job- unfortunately i tend to get sacked after 3 seasons with weymouth and struggle to find new employment)- but when i do get a good game going, i am often moaned at for loud celebrations when scoring important goals, or for screaming at the ref when he penalises my team (i have also been known on many occasions to say "i just knew you'd make me bloody concede in the last minute you cheating ******* of a game)

Link to post
Share on other sites

Commendable approach :)

Press Interviews - Its a new feature so with so much feedback this year I'm sure Si will take another look

I've loved some posts here where the Manager has done a Joe Kinnear and they've got a great response back:D

Link to post
Share on other sites

i've been doing this since i started playing CM in the good ol' days.

i tend to 'create' a radio station that is dedicated soley (sic) to my club regardless of their level (appparently there is 1 for Liverpool FC and Basingstoke Town!) and I'm on a weekly talk show discussing the team. On occasion my players also attend and I say their answers too!

God that sounds sad! I'm 27 living with my partner and have a high paying important job (My partner reminds me of this everytime she hears me telling the sink that we plan to keep this winning streak going into the new division!)

Still, as the classic saying goes: THIS IS FOOTBALL MANAGER!!

Link to post
Share on other sites

While I find the idea of doing press conferences disturbing, I do indulge in other things like

1) Mimicking attacking players in my team(Ronaldo, Rooney) like you see them in compilations. I'll do dribbling with no ball or act like I'm scoring. For defenders I'll do actions like heading the ball away, winning challenges. You get the point. IF I'm playing CL games I'll sing the CL song while doing it just like on television when they show CL previews or reviews, while acting like the players in my teams just like in compilations.

2) When I win championships or cups, I'll raise an imginary throphy up in the air and jump like they do in celebrations.

3) If I win important matches, after the match I'll always put my hands up in the air and clap like what the players always do.

Yeah I don't imitate managers much but just the players heh.

Link to post
Share on other sites

My best tactical moments come on the pan

I hold on for <just one more match> then press pause and leg it up stairs

A few moments calm, a bit of paperwork and my tactical approach is clear. Bless that pause button :D

After playing around a dozen of matches I need to walk around the neighbhour for half an hour to take a break and meanwhile I better focus the situation from a satellite point of view , the global picture becomes sharper and I can act in a smarter way on every field, transfers, contract renewals, tactic, training etc. :)

Link to post
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...

I often do press conferences, usually on the loo but often when do tasks such as making tea and washing up.

I've reached my first Cup final with Spurs and i'm going to contact chas and dave for a cup final single i think! If i get an important win i'll congratulate the travelling fans/loyal home supporters for their support!

And i'm dead proud of these facts!

Link to post
Share on other sites

My mate and I are playing network or online once a week since 1998 now and we have always interviewed each other about the recent developments at the beginning of each game month. Unfortunately nowadays he doesn't have multi-tasking and online playing is slow enough so we prefer to get going rather than spending 20 minutes on interviews. I miss them :(

By myself I don't speak to the press, I just keep thinking about my squad all the time (or rather both of my squads, from my own game and the online one). Hell, I'm at work now and should do other things than posting this and reading so much on here.

I'm even a bit tempted to get my laptop out of the bag and play a bit. Had it with me at my girlfriend's yesterday to play the game and quite a few times she got shocked by sudden outbursts of joy and anger. She wouldn't understand that 6 missed CCCs in the last 5 minutes when 2-3 away at Arsenal were driving me up the wall. ;)

Link to post
Share on other sites

has no one ever put thier arm around thier star striker whos not performing and told him u needed a big one out of him for the match tomorrow? Or called the promising young player to the side after training and told him hes in for the match on saturday. Maybe even told ur centre half your resting him for tactical reasons? always do that in the imagination!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Yesterday I had a CL final match with Barca,Im Inter. OK this is what I did for this match.

First I go to shower and during the shower I had the press conference and I tell the press the Barca lineup (just like Jose did at Chelsea). Then yes I put on my suit and tie since its a CL final!After a "handshake" with Pep Guardiola, I got in front of my laptop then the Champions league music play I stand up. With a serious expression in my face.

Half time 0-0,I was off my seat and walk outside my corridor pretending im heading to the changing room.After shouting at my players "all you need is one more goal,you can do it!" I walk back to my laptop.After 90 mins its still scoreless then I walk around to give instruction to the boys who were lying down relaxing their thighs.

At the end I lost 0-1 through a 121th minute goal by Bojan and I was devastated. :( Then after the whistle I did a Mourinho style "They are the true hero" by pointing at the imaginary in tears Zanettis Cambiassos Maicons and comfort them by a pat at the back (literally pat at the pillow, door and cupboard).

Of course I wait till no one at home to do all this!hehe to be honest I think I need help!:D

Link to post
Share on other sites

Press conferences whilst sitting on the pan

I've just thought of a possible alternative for Harry Rednapp when speaking about Darren Bent missing a header that he said even Mrs Rednapp could have scored.

"Jeez, that Darren Bent would miss the water even when sitting on the pan" :)

Link to post
Share on other sites

I had a press conference yesterday in the bath, talking about my new signings in the close season and my teams chances in coming second season under my command. Trouble is, even the imaginary journos are on my back and asking repeating questions, it's getting repetitive lol

Link to post
Share on other sites

I do it all the time. Mostly in work where I tend to get bored a lot.

Last Thursday i spent about 30 mins in work 'conducting' an interview on how proud I was of getting Cardiff City promoted to the Premiership and how my captain Will Haining was integral to our success and how much respect i had for him.

Secretly I knew he wasnt good enough for the prem so on Monday I bought a new Russian centre back for £4.6m and made him new captain.

I felt guilty about what I had done but it was for the good of the team.

This sums up FM for me!

Link to post
Share on other sites

i've been doing this since i started playing CM in the good ol' days.

i tend to 'create' a radio station that is dedicated soley (sic) to my club regardless of their level (appparently there is 1 for Liverpool FC and Basingstoke Town!) and I'm on a weekly talk show discussing the team. On occasion my players also attend and I say their answers too!

God that sounds sad! I'm 27 living with my partner and have a high paying important job (My partner reminds me of this everytime she hears me telling the sink that we plan to keep this winning streak going into the new division!)

Still, as the classic saying goes: THIS IS FOOTBALL MANAGER!!

I create a tv channel for all my teams (even the small ones),,i tend to be on the tv a lot lol. I also imagine the newspaper repoters are talking about me and my team on the skysports programme "the sunday supplement"

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...