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*FMS Era Grumpy Awards* Live from Gavrenwick's Love Palace


Terk

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Darn, Terk spotted his mistake, I was in the middle of trying to come up with something witty about how a plan can be deprived and how likely it was that said plan would take place in Scotland. Oh well.

I'm so used to my own typos that I now read over my posts as soon as I've made them, lest a smart arse like you get hold of my myriad mistakes :p

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Is it just me or does pretty much every time awards of any kind get handed out in FMS, there is a sinister sexual undertone to the whole proceedings?

We are, admittedly, a disturbing bunch of folk.

Now pipe down, Southerner.

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Is it just me or does pretty much every time awards of any kind get handed out in FMS, there is a sinister sexual undertone to the whole proceedings?

That's just you, gags etc are pretty much a lifestyle for the rest of us, it isn't purely sexual. Pft.

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So, let's begin. The Grumpies are a celebration of everything that is moronic, frustrating or simply pointless in the land of FMS. In that spirit, we shall start with the award for

Most Nauseating Story Character

And the nominees are,

Rob Ridgway

  • Completely fed-up of the whining yank.
  • Just because 10-3 needs to be brought down to near Earth orbit

Mark Wilson

  • Why does he insist on being the **** Mark Wilson whereever he goes? Use another name for god sake. Just not Dick Smallberries, that's taken.

Tina Powell

  • Look at me, I have bizarre genitals

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And the winner, by a long, long way, is Rob Ridgway, you nauseating American b*stard.

Rob Ridgway has released the following statement through his whining press lackey, William Winthrop:

"Bite me."

Thank you. :D

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Moving onwards, there are some stories which the forum could well do without, clogging up bandwith despite the fact that no one cares anymore. These are the nominees for

Story Most Deserving of Euthanasia

Rob Ridgway's "Rat Pack"

  • Someone needs to learn the meaning of two simple words, “The End”.
  • Let's face it, by this stage 10-3 is simply drawing it all out just to mess with us.

Knight - Win, Lose or Die

  • Let's write seven paragraphs to describe the secretary that works for my character.
  • There is attention to detail and then there is just trying to slowly bore your audience to death
  • Nurse, Nurse! The story has flat lined again but don't bother with the defribulator.

The Re-Anglicisation Of Manchester United

  • Do we really need another United Story!
  • Try this with challenge with Rochdale and I'd be impressed.

Tina's Super Saints of Paisley

  • It's St. Mirren, seriously, NO-ONE CARES!

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Some people hide in the corners of the forum, waiting to see if they'll be noticed. The nominees for this award have no such problem, all believing that they are the biggest and best thing ever to be seen in FMS.

Biggest Ego

SCIAG

  • Going around asking for proofreaders for Call of Sport 2 like it's going to be a best seller for christ sake.
  • This award should be 'FMS'er you would least want to have a pint down the pub with' He would probably tell me about all the people he has banned from the forum, how his 'masterpiece' new work was ready for proof readers. And I imagine my only offering to the conversation would be "So.......do you like this beer?" To which he would get his encyclopedia out and tell me it was a rare breed of stout. At that point I'd down my stout and walk out, strikes me that he enjoys being a pedant and a professional patroniser of the mentally challenged in GD

tenthreeleader

  • Nobody talks more about his story than himself.
  • We all know he has a good story on the boards, SO STOP TELLING HIM. I struggle to believe he fits through doors anymore.

Stoehrst

  • Can shove his 'journalism' up his arse.
  • I think this guy might have mentioned he does a blog, once or twice (maybe 5, who keeps count these days)

Terk

  • Practically invented FMS if you go by all the sh*t he talks
  • Clearly feels that the forum will collapse if he's not around.

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