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Rosco Van Nistelrooy

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by TURPS:

Be nice Bod u are so horrid icon_frown.gif

I cant help it if i am rubbish at champo icon_mad.gif

Still we are better than Morton they are sh¡t icon_wink.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I can hear the Morton terrace chants now

"We are Morton , Super Morton

No one likes us , we dont care

We hate Shire , blackneck Ba*%&ds

Please dont take my Morton away"

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The Season is well and truely under way and Ton were onto there usual business of climbing the league. Though, we hope to maintane a good run throughout the season.

A trip to Dumbarton kicked of the session and Ton were in jubelant mood, in the knowledge that one of the east Stirling players has actually taken a bath, so hopefully they wont smell like there Gaffer when they visit. Sviensson rewarded Abrahams confidance in him by opening the scoring. In the second half Uotinen made a nice run at goal and fired a clean shot, but the ball deflected of Keeper Goldie putting Ton another goal up but denied Uotinens notch in his season goal tally. New winger Fosse ended the day whith a nicely converted penalty.

In the Challenge cup againt Clyde Ton sat back and let the higher Division team to attack them. But in the 54th minute Keogh scored a goal which ended Tons involvment in this years cup.

A closely fuaght game was to fallow against stenhousmuir which patterson opened the scoring but Graham did the Division 3 new boys a favour by scoring a double that would make Ronaldo jealous.

East Fife have always been a hard side to beat particulary at home, But there guests were no ordinary side, oh no, The fifers were hosting a game againt the mighty ton and patterson and sviensson made sure that the blue and white hoops returned to Inverclyde with a 2-0 victory.

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lambie's Lovechild:

"Oh id rather be a Coisty than a Turps

Oh Id rather be a Coisty than a Turps

Oh id rather be a Coisty

and keep the women Moisty

Id rather be a Coisty than a Turps"

[This message was edited by Lambie's Lovechild on 17 August 2003 at 23:05.]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Rememeber when Bod brave and bold, faught for the Jags cause in far off lands. And as Dogsfault said to me, heez just a fecking peewee wae thistle and his cock in his hand... icon_biggrin.gif

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by TURPS:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lambie's Lovechild:

"Oh id rather be a Coisty than a Turps

Oh Id rather be a Coisty than a Turps

Oh id rather be a Coisty

and keep the women Moisty

Id rather be a Coisty than a Turps"

[This message was edited by Lambie's Lovechild on 17 August 2003 at 23:05.]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Rememeber when Bod brave and bold, faught for the Jags cause in far off lands. And as Dogsfault said to me, heez just a fecking peewee wae thistle and his cock in his hand... icon_biggrin.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

For aw his Bluster Rosco , theres only 2 original clan members still here, and as i recall , Doggy's just some wee numpty that came crying to get a spot in the clan cos he was fed up playin wi the Schoolies in UCMIG. icon_biggrin.gif

As fur the jags , im no less passionate about them now im hundreds of miles away than i was when i was 20 miles away. And wi Ally here to bolster the numbers, the Jags fans of the CM Forums will continue to fight the cause of The Red and Yellow army for many years to come!

icon_cool.gif

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But hey the SPL just ripped the heart and soul out of the jags.

Lambie left citing many spl regulations as really quashing his passion to continue.

Motherwell stole your only striker. Killie stole your best attacking midfielder. Dundee utd stole your defence.

I mean we all know why, these lads especially hardie have ambitions of playing in europe :p

I believe the cause of the red and yellow army over the next couple of years is not to do a St Mirren :p

i.e. Expand your stadium and leave yourselves in debt with loads of overpaid numpties fleshing out your squad cause your youth system hasn't come out with anything good in a bit.

L8r's Sunday8pm

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Grizzly:

But hey the SPL just ripped the heart and soul out of the jags.

Lambie left citing many spl regulations as really quashing his passion to continue.

Motherwell stole your only striker. Killie stole your best attacking midfielder. Dundee utd stole your defence.

I mean we all know why, these lads especially hardie have ambitions of playing in europe :p

I believe the cause of the red and yellow army over the next couple of years is not to do a St Mirren :p

i.e. Expand your stadium and leave yourselves in debt with loads of overpaid numpties fleshing out your squad cause your youth system hasn't come out with anything good in a bit.

L8r's Sunday8pm<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I think we are fortunate in that we have a very very good board, who simply will not allow the club to run up a huge debt simply so they can succeed. This may result in us sometimes losing out on players we might otherwise have succeeded in getting, but at the end of the day , id rather see a Jags team thats entertaining on the park and secure off it than a team that blows all its money on big name signings and then has to go into administration.

BTW , im all for a rule which says that clubs which cannot prove their solvency get relegated , like they have in France , Italy , etc etc.

That would VERY quickly sort out those overpaid idiots elsewhere in the SPL

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my mates a die hard thistle fan, he's fae milton so has no hope icon_wink.gif

i asked him about my dream team, he said mitchell will be a star, hasnt figured as of yet icon_mad.gif i'm ragin.

Ya Stevie the dogmeister came, he saw, he conquered!!!

They all slag Jim White for his comment to Brian Laudrup, but if only the world knew that the Phrase actually originated in a wee unknown chat room on MIRC.

I remember the night Stevie well, the night you said

"doggy, why are you so good!!!!" ROFL icon_biggrin.gif

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Why target an aspect of the problem stevie. Let's be honest if we want to fix something we should go to the root icon_smile.gif

Them eejits that run the SFA are and have been the problem for a v long time. We spend all our time fussing over the problems they make specifically and just not sorting out them.

Did I ever tell you that I had the fortune of sharing a small classroom with Peter Donald's son? a mate of mine stevie knows still wants to sort him oot because of comments made to his gf by the cretin. I also saw said spawn of satan at the QM a couple of years back, he was drunk and sporting hussies on each arm still talking in a very above himself manner. I don't think he knows most of us don't like him.

Best thing is he had the mick taken out of him for a whole year. He couldn't answer a question a teacher posed him in computing class so he retorted with the answer "It's blatantly obvious", too which when challenged he couldn't point out specifically what was blatantly obvious. I wonder if that was a pearl his father gave him.

L8r's Sunday8pm

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by coisty:

If yer a Fanny and ya know it, yer Ross Turps

If yer a Fanny and ya know it, yer Ross Turps

If yer a Fanny and yea know it, and yer team can really blow it

If yer a Fanny and ya know it, yer Ross Turps

icon_biggrin.gificon_wink.gif I'm creative, me!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Yep im one big Lettuce but I dont Care. I will let my CM do the talking.......Children icon_wink.gif

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The Spiders Web

With the season in full swing these early games are good for sussing out tactics and players but the main prospect is of points.

We travelled to Shielfield park with the object of atleast picking up a point and Johnathon Whelen opened the scoring in spectacular style on the 12th minute when he thundered home a 30 yard volley, not to be outdone by this Berwicks McCormick answered in just as good fashion when he levelled things up just after half time. Just as it looked like it was going to be a point a piece McAdam slotted home his first of the season late on to secure all 3 points for Queens Park.

Berwick 1 - 2 Queens Park

Challenge Cup 1st round put us up against Dundee's multi National side but as we found out the Queens Park players were not going to be intimated against some would see as superior quality, with the game being at Hampden Park it gave us much needed home advantage, Johann Porhallsson was a thorn in the dundee side as he opened the scoring just before the half hour mark and it was Steven McAdam who added a 2nd 3 minutes later.

Porhallsson added his second of the afternoon 4 minutes from the half time whistle and when you thought things couldn't get worse for Dundee it did when Wilkie was adjudged to have fouled Porhallsson in the box and Paul Reid slotted home the penalty to send Queens Park in at half time with a 4 goal lead,Steven McAdam added his 2nd of the afternoon and Queens Parks 5th before Garry Brady scored a consolation for Dundee.

Queens Park 5 - 1 Dundee

We were brought back down to earth with an all mighty fud when we travelled to take on Hamilton Accies, Armstrong opened the scoring in no less than 2 minutes and a few minutes later Dyer converted a penalty to put Accies up by 2 before even 5 minutes had been played, Russell added a 3rd 10 minutes later and it was turning out to be a damage limitation excersice, Just after half time when Kieth Kelly scored his first for Queens Park to give us a glimmer of hope but that was dashed when McCormick added to the scoresheet for Hamilton.

Hamilton 4 - 1 Queens Park

Challenge Cup 2nd round and high flying Albion Rovers proved to be too much for us in what was a tight game, with Miller opening the scoring for the home side on the 15th minute and weekes adding to the tally just before the half hour mark however things when from bad to worse when just after the break Debutant Gez Murphy was sent off when he lashed out at a Albion Rovers Player. With a tactical switch here and there young Christopher Mackie was introduced to the game and it was he who slotted home the consolation goal for us to give us hope of maybe salvaging a replay atleast but that was all the fat lady wrote and thats how the game ended.

Albion Rovers 2 - 1 Queens Park

Back to the league and back at home as Stranraer came a knocking and it was to be what would be known as the Gez Murphy show but this time for all the right reasons as he bagged himself a hat-trick after onloan winger Kelly opened the scoring with a wondferul left footed volley but as said it was Gez Murphy who stole the show with his pace and cool finishing.

Queens Park 4 - 0 Stranraer

Gary Toner

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The Gable Ender

After a decent first game away to Elgin in which we snatched a point and the demolition of Raith Rovers in the challenge cup, optimism was high at Links Park. Last years loan star, Steve McConalogue, signed up for another season as cover for Nish and Kerrigan.

First home match up against Rosco's East Stirlingshire. A wonderful game of flowing attacking football from both teams but Montrose's quality shone through as Midddleton scored and Kerrigan grabbed two more to send the Shire home pointless. They would have the chance to take revenge in the following weeks as we had been drawn together in the Second Round of the Challenge Cup, but this one finished -Montrose 3 - 2 East Stirlingshire

East Fife were the next side to come calling at Links and were despatched with ease. Goals each from Dunn, Nish and Kerrigan ensured an easy win for Trose. Montrose 3 - 1 East Fife

Rematch time in the Challenge Cup Second round away to East Stirling. Stevie Kerrigan was again the difference between the sides as he struck two fine goals to send the Shire tumbling out of the Cup. East Stirlingshire 0 - 2 Montrose

Gretna are now a team to be respected in the league. Not too long ago they clung tightly to 10th place and rarely troubled anyone home or away. Those times, unfortunatly have gone as the home team turned in a battling performance which Trose had no answer for. Gretna 2 - 0 Montrose

Another break from league business then as we entertained Clyde in the 3rd round of the Challenge Cup. Despite the obvious class in the Clyde squad we managed to defend well and and wear the Bully Wee down. One goal was always going to settle this one and it came when a rebounded Kerrigan shot on goal was bundled into the net by a hapless Clyde defender. Montrose 1 - 0 Clyde

Double celebrations as the Manager of the Month award was delivered to Links Park. Again the players and backroom staff deserve this award and the team is definatly moving in the right direction. Important league games to follow as we try to maintain our good start to the season as well as a Semi Final against the mighty Peterhead at home to look forward to.

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### SHIRE GAFFER IN BATH SHOCKER!!!! ###

Its amazing what a bath and a new club diet of pie meat can produce, as the initial dodgy form in the opening few games become a distant memory as East Stirling gorged their way up the league! gaffer Turps was so chuffed he even went out and bought some new tabac and insignia aftershave to celebrate, not that he needed any favours in the woman department... as there are so many homosexual rival gaffers in the 3rd division the birds and players keep flocking to Firs Park!

Season 3 ins now well under way now and although the bottom division is still very crowded and competitive the Clan are stretching out and finding their place within our scottish netgame. This season the early signs are looking pretty good for Shire and their is an optimistic buzz around Firs Park and the dressing room. We had a descent enough start and have only lost the 2 league games after 2 months which leaves u 3 points off the top spot with a game in hand. At home we are Rampant and the great league Cup win will hopefully see a lucrative tie at dens Park next Month for our little football club. It was sad to see a few key player injured for the start of the campaighn, namely new wingers Chris Burke and Bernard Diomede. The fans will be pleased to know they are now fully fit and have chalk on their boots every game.

The next session will see some trick away fixtures and will prove a much sterner test. Hopefully we can equip ourselves well and stay in touch with the bigger clubs and promotion favourites. Its one game at a time as the old saying goes........here's how the last 2 sessions games went.

14.8.04 Montrose 3 EAST STIRLING 2

A tricky visit to Links park for Shire and no surprises, promotion candidates Montrose were well up for it and put Shire to the sword with most the possession and better finishing mainly thought thier talismanic veteran striker Stevie Kerrigan!!!! aw well ye canny win em aw well played Sandy.

21.8.04 EAST STIRLING 3 Gretna 2

Shire were on fire at the start and took a good 2-0 first half lead though veteran David hannah and Marv Robinson. Shire went 3 ahead again through Marv but Jimbos Gretna battled back and showed true character with two fine strikes to pressure Shire till the end. Shire hung on tho and Defended well insuring all 3 points stayed at Firs Park....thank goodness!

25.8.04 EAST STIRLING 0 Montrose 2

I hate Stevie Kerrigan.....AAAAAARRRGGGHHHHHHHH icon_mad.gif

28.8.04 Cowdenbeath 3 EAST STIRLING 2 ( Challenge Cup 1st Rnd)

Central Park is a tricky venue at the best of times, and Sav's Beath can be very unpredictable. The game itself was pretty even with chances limited at both ends. The Blue Brazils were more clinical tho and wrapped up the points with a conentious penlaty despatched by wwinter in the 27th min and Davie Knox's good strike just after half time. More effort was needed from shire and the next sequence of home games would be crucial.

8.9.04 EAST STILRING 4 Dumbarton 0

Two strikes either half saw Shire win at home very comfortably in a comprehensive performance. A 1st half Lee Norton penalty sent Shire on their way and a Marvin Robinson double dumped the Dumbarton duds. They never even had a shot at goal we had the ball so much and could have scored more with the all the possession we had. They need a gaffer bad! even Scots was better...lol

25.9.04 EAST STIRLING 4 Morton 0

A superb 1st half performance saw Shire fly out the blocks against hated rivals Ton. No motivation was needed as gaffer Turps detested the Greenock soap dodgers and the lads did tthe gaffer proud, cruising to an easy victory. Goals from loanee winger Chris Burke and a wonder freekick from David hannah did the damage as Marvin Robinson sealed the result to rap up the points. Luckless Ton were woe full and their defence was pityfull. They did manage to score a goal tho, Wayne Henderson scored a great goal all by himself! pity it was at the wrong end tho....No wonder when the managers tactics are so confusing!

29.9.04 Berwick 2 EAST STIRLING 3 (Scottish League Cup 1st Rnd)

3 first half strikes and one form the spot saw Defender Lee Norton convert and cultured striker Kelly grab a brace to sink the Wee Rangers oot the Scottish League Cup. Just rewards for shire who have had no cup success ever although they needed to really hang on at the death as Berwick really went for it, desperate to force extra time. Shire defended stronly tho and deserved thier place in round 2 with a glamour tie against Dundee at Dens the prize. the lads will travel in a confident mood and on this form will give the Dark Blues a hard game thats for sure.

The local Fanny just canny get enuff off Turps's ou de 'pie meat' after shave and attractive silky sexy football at Firs Park icon_wink.gif

kitanajadebath023.jpg

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Northern Scot Sport

GO ELGIN, IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY!

New season and new attitude to the league as Elgin City start to show what they can really do. Turning Borrough Briggs into a fortress at which they have let to lose at and also only losing one game away, and Manager Simon Lynn was not in charge in that loss as he had flown off to help fellow manger Ross Turpie come to terms with the thought of a bath.

Transfers have been sparse for the first team this season with Simon Lynn investing in some of the countries best youth player joining the under 18s side which has seen them move into 3rd in the under 18s league.

The biggest signings have came in the way of On loan strikers Brian Prunty and Mike Kamara both of which have been scoring for fun, But with the news that Celtic have ACCEPTED an offer of Paul Bernard for Brian Prunty icon_mad.gif It looks like we will be saying goodbye to Brian Prunty at the xmas transfer window. In response to this Simon Lynn took swift action and on the day Rangers Reserve striker John McDonald's contract ran out at Gers, he made a offer and managed to secure his services for the next few years.

Biggest departure has to be the loss of MARTIN PIRIE back to Fraserborough. they gave ua a healty 40k plus starlet Graeme Bain a good deal all round and we wish Martin all the best.

Heres How elgins season has gone so far.

Elgin 1-1 Montrose

Prunty Scored on his debut but the effort was cancelled out by trose wonder striker Steve Kerrigan. Good start against fellow challengers.

Elgin 4-1 Partick Thistle (AET) Challenge Cup

Brilliant display in Simon Lynns first cup game, Myles scored for Elgin and Walker pegged us back in extra time it was all Elgin with Prunty, Halflioason and Tully all getting on the scoresheet.

Gretna 3-0 Elgin

Christaino Coste was left in charge for this one as Simon Lynn helped Ross Turpie overcome bathing issues. A bad performance all round and we await our next meeting at borrough briggs to see whos best in what will be a more closly fought contest.

Elgin 1-0 Cowdenbeath

A game with not really much in it apart from a wonderful free kick from Brian Prunty that sealed it for Elgin.

Ross County 2-0 Elgin Challenge Cup 2nd Rnd

A hard fought game against one of the better sides in the challenge cup. Away would always be a bit of a worry as we failed a test and learned a lesson which brought us back down to earth, a good thing really.

Dumbarton 1-3 Elgin

Taking on the bottom of the league side might seem easy but game like that are always tricky Mike Kamara scored on his debut with a diving header and Morley got Dumbarton back on level terms only for the second half to be the Brian Prunty show in which his brace saw us out comfortably.

Elgin 2-2 Stenhousemuir

Another tough match that had many a manager before us lose badly to the 3rd division new boys. Kamara and Benjamin had put us 2 up and coasting before some bad defensive mistakes had let graham in to score a brace and let stenny away with a point.

Elgin 4-1 Kilmarknock Scottish Cup 1st Round

Elgin were runnin wild in this game and after an early Di Giacomo scare ran out VERY comfortable winners with PRUNTY, KAMARA, CRAIG AND KAMARA again ending killie dreams of a hampden final. Manager Simon Lynn dedicated this win to Ross Turpie.

Morton 0-1 Elgin

Another stale away performance only brightend up by the one Prunty goal as Elgin managed to nick the points off a morton side with much more than tactical worries, as

they just cant win!

Elgin 4-1 Airdrie

A top of the table clash saw Elgin show true grit and determination to wizz all over Airdrie 2 goals from KAMARA were backed up by a PRUNTY goal and new signing John McDonald scored with only his second subs appearance. Maisano got one back for Airdrie.

Stirling 5-2 Elgin Scottish Cup 2nd Round

Another lesson learned as once more our away tactic show they need a tweaking. Last seasons div 3 champions show us the depth in class between us. Lesson learned.

Sitting second in the league and one point of the top leaves Elgin in a good position early on, keep up this form and all you fans who took the chance on the 25-1 odd of getting promoted could be rolling in it

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by richard t:

Hi all hows it going? rosco you kept your good form quiet you failed to tell me how poor you were doing icon_biggrin.gif speek to you all later<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

roonie gets confused between the words win and lose

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by coisty:

Pornography!!!!!!! I demand a OTF style public exicution ... sorry, public banning!!!!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

lol its art dude ! you never seen a beautifull woman bathe? thers loads down Firs Park maybe u should dump those mingin Greenock growlers son icon_wink.gif

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So I leave the guys for a couple of sessions just hoping to be ticking along nicely in midtable ready for the promotion surge when I come back, well that was the plan anyway. Clearly my division 3 buddies thought “ah, Chris is away for a while lets feck his team up and get rid of the best team in the division†While this worked for the first 7 games as we crashed to a lowly 9th spot and only 1 win, it was not going to stop me turning things round on my return.

My campaign started with a 4-1 humping of the much fancies Elgin City. The first half was sloppy as my lads took time to get back into my way of playing but we had a rampant 2nd half as goals flew in from Deuchar, Edwards and a Gilbert double.

Still in 9th spot we entertained bottom side Dumbarton at Raydale for a simple 5-1 hammering. Alex Martin got 1 as the rest of us watched in awe as Kenny D grabbed 4.

Another home game but this time it was the new East Stirling side being led by gobby gaffer Ross Turpie. Turpie says it’s all down the the pie meat that he has turned into a “good gaffer†but we think there may be more to it and will be probing a secret investigation into the goings on at firs park, prepare for some nasty truths about Killies most hated son. Oh and the jammy bas won 2-0.

Our first game on the road seen us face St.Johnston of the 1st division in the League Cup 3rd round. We easily disposed of the much fancies Saints 3-1 with goals from all 3 strikers Gilbert, Roberston and Kenny D.

Very strange though that despite beating a Div 1 team away we couldn’t emulate that feat at Ochilview in a crucial league match. This one ended 1 a piece with our goal coming from a freak McMahon long ball. So still in 9th and we are simply making our promotion push look even more impressive than bods.

I DO NO BEFCUKING BELIEVE THIS GAME, 2 DISSALLOWED GOALS, 1 of which was a absolute peach, AND ABOUT 8 MISSED 1 ON 1’S. SANDY YOU JAMMY BAS. Fortunatly Gordon Gilbert finally got a equaliser on the 86th minute but I can not believe how many chances we missed.

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### SHIRE FLY HIGHER ###

With a third of the season now gone Shire have defied thier sceptics and produced some silky football which has amazingly sent gaffer Turps and his small football club to the very top of Scots Division 3. Shire fans are 'pie in the sky' about the new fortunes of their unfashionable football club and the good form of late culminated in Manager of the Month awards for gaffer Turps and top Striker Marvelous Marvin Robinson. The sudden change of fortunes has caught some crap rival gaffers by storm but gaffer Turps knew his Tactics and system would come good as the team now has experience and quality players in crucial positions. All the hard work on the training ground is finally paying off and if the team can keep improving and playing well then the championship will be heading to Firs Park there is no doubt. So its fingers crossed for an injury free winter and some more of the same performnaces that have propelled Shire into the winning mentality. The league Cup run is going well and the great win over Dundee and the forthcoming visit of Glasgow Rangers to Firs Park has helped the clubs finances greatly. The club is heading north now and matching the gaffers ambitions as bigger rival clubs in the division are capitulating week in week out . Heres how the games went..........

2.10.04 Airdrie Utd 2 EAST STIRLING 4

Two early goals in the 1st 10 minutes took the Diamonds by surprise as Shire flew out the blocks and dominated the proceedings. Two more golas before half time killed the game as a competitve fixture and Airdrie never got going until the 2nd half but by that time the points were Firs Park bound. Stuart Kelly scored a fine Brace and marvin Robinson and Dean Sinclair were also on the scoresheet

6.10.4 Stenhousmuir 0 EAST STIRLING 2

Another tricky away fixture saw Shire over come superior opposition although they had to work for it. Stenny were a good team and the match was pretty even. A fine Marvin Robinson strike and Chris Burke tap in ment that clinical finishing was the difference on the day and the fine away victory was much appreciated thats for sure.

11.10.04 EAST STIRLING 7 Elgin 1 icon_biggrin.gif

The prematch meal of pie meat gave Shire the strength for victory as they totally steamrollered a poor and niave Elgin side for the whole 90 minutes. Super Marv scored a hat-trick and Kelly,Bernard and Gayson got in on the act also. Amazingly Elgin had not done any home work nor changed their tactics when things were going wrong. It would not surprise me if the Balck & Whites would be looking for a new gaffer soon as the current one is definatley not up to scratch.

23.10.04 East Fife 0 EAST STIRLING 2

There were times in the past when the Fifers were the thorn in Shire's side but not any more. As Shire are improving in all areas, East Fife are going backwards as the performances of both the East's suggested in this revered encounter. A goal either half from Stuart kelly and Marv Robinson ensured victory as the Bayview Bootboy barmy army surrendered and were blown away by Shire and their superior firepower.

26.10.04 Dundee 1 EAST STIRLING 4

It is true to say that Shire's Cup form has been pathetic in the last 2 seasons under gaffer Turps. Shire were playing well how ever and held no fears in travelling to Dens Park to take on fallen giants Dundee. The boys were awzome and the greatest cup result in many a season was the reward for the rescent good form. marvin Robinson our top scorer was the hero with a supreb hat- trick sending the 6000 dour dee fans home to batter their wifes once again.

30.10.04 EAST STIRLING 3 Montrose 0

Trose were promotion and bookies favourites for this one and Shire were well to revenge last months poor performance against the 'Gable Endies'. Shire were on fire however and the good form continued as three first half goals trounced Trose and established Shire at the top of the 3rd Division Table.

9.11.04 Gretna 0 EAST STIRLING 1

On paper this was the most difficult league fixture of late as Gretna had previous and they were pushing Shirte hard in the league for the promotion spots. The game its self was fiercly contested and it took a mazy Stuart kelly striketo settle the score and steal all 3 points with a narrow victory.

WHO 8 ALL THE PIES!

SHIRE 8 ALL THE PIE'S.....

WE LUV PIE MEAT .... & SEEING MORTON BEAT......

SHIRE 8 ALL THE PIE'S.....

Oh SH¡T ON....SH¡T ON....SH¡T on THE B@STARDS BELOW....BELOW!

POO_MANch.gif

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Alasdair Shaw's Programme Notes

Dear Supporters,

Printing problems prevented us from publishing a pre-season issue, but I’m delighted to bring you news of our summer signings and how they’ve started this season’s second division campaign.

Obliviously, it was important to add to the quality of our squad after our glorious division three triumph, especially with the departure of loan stars Kyle, Miller, Schumacher and Reid and the retirement of the influential Danny Lennon.

It was with great excitement that I secured the signature of Alen Boksic, one of Europe’s most experienced strikers, Jonathan Spector, an American international defender who joins on loan from Manchester United, midfielder Gary Fisken from Watford, also on loan and former Crystal Palace defender Christian Edwards.

Also joining were Paul Merson, who needs no introduction and will be helping with our coaching, Tom Cowan, an experienced left back from York, while the youth side was bolstered by the arrivals of midfielder Adam Nelson, defender Scott Lowe and the promising Irish striker, Barry Thornton, who signs after a spell at Coventry City.

Apart from Lennon’s retirement and the departure of the players we had on loan, the only other face leaving the club was that of Gavin Chadbone, who joins Salisbury.

I’m still far from satisfied with my squad and will be looking to bring in more players, perhaps on loan, and moulding another championship winning side.

Our preseason friendly games boded well for the new season, with wins over Motherwell, Brechin, Stenhousemuir and Queen of the South. And the bookmakers put us at 6-4 for lifting the league trophy at the end of the season.

However out competitive kick off left me far from encouraged as we went down to a 2-0 defeat at Stranraer. Despite the fact that we routed them 3-0 in the cup last year and they were reduced to 10 men after Diamond’s sending off, we struggled in our second division debut game and goals from Harty and a majestic lob from Kelly punished our sluggish start.

The Challenge Cup First Round match at Inverness Caledonian Thistle gave us the chance to get our heads lifted once more with a win and our emphatic 3-1 victory did just that.

Clague was in the prolific form which helped us to last season’s silverware and his hat trick brushed the highlanders aside despite an injury time penalty from Wyness pulling them one back.

With a long standing scouting mission calling me away from the dugout, I left my capable assistants in charge and returned a few weeks later delighted to see us in second place in the league.

I returned to the hot seat in time for our trip to the struggling Alloa Athletic and was confident of three points after early goals from Boksic and Clague.

However I didn’t imagine the ferocity of the Alloa comeback and our missed chances and poor defending cost us dearly as goals from Wallace, Johnson and Watson gave the hosts the win and left us with red faces after throwing away a two goal lead.

It was therefore more important than ever to get back on the winning track when bottom place Arbroath came calling.

We started well and I’m sure we are all perplexed as to how the referee awarded an indirect free kick rather than a penalty when goalkeeper Woodcock was sent off for obstructing the oncoming Clague in the box. Regardless, a free kick was awarded and Clague found the net during the goalmouth scramble.

Things soon got even better, when Clague was in the right place at the right time to stroke home a cross from Nicholas and the win was capped with a fabulous 25 yard strike from Nicholas to make the score 3-0 and put us joint second in the league with Forfar and Queens Park, who are our next league opponents.

The League Cup Second Round saw us make a return to darkest Elgin City to take on Simon Lynn’s third division side.

An exciting game delivered plenty of goals and it took just 4 minutes to put us in front, bundling the ball over the line from a corner kick.

A thunderous 20 yard shot from Nicholas made it two and Clague bagged another from a seemingly impossible angle, despite looking suspiciously offside.

Our inability to clear a corner kick let Craig pull one back just before half time, but Clague notched up his hat trick after the interval and even though Prunty made it 4-2 we ran out clear winners and Nicholas scored from the edge of the area to send us in to the next round with style.

The recent performances of Nicholas have not gone unnoticed and I was thrilled to hear that he had scooped the Bells Second Division Player of the Month award.

Our inconsistent early season form continued when we visited the national stadium to take on Gaz Toner’s Queens Park side.

The Spiders were amongst the teams at the top of the table, and Mackie’s early goal for them was enough to separate the teams from a drab an uneventful 90 minutes.

I wanted to draw a line under this defeat and move into a period of stability, stringing a few good performances together and gelling the side into the well oiled machine that won us the championship last season.

The visit of Hamilton turned out to be the perfect game to kick start our season and find some form, with a Greilich penalty conversion and a Cunnington own goal propelling us into second place in the league and encouraging me with the result and performance.

This new confidence was the ideal preparation for the game against Stranraer and Boksic showed his class with two fine finishes before Clague pounced on a rebound to give us a three goal lead. On 87 minutes Nicholas scored another gem for his impressive collection of wonder goals by picking the ball up inside his own half and carrying it up field to round the keeper and slot home and there was still time for Holloway to net a 30 yard strike to polish off a 5-0 hammering that send us joint top of the table.

With our league performances looking better, we welcomed Ayr United in our League Cup Third Round game and on paper, looked the weaker side without Clague (suspended) and the injured Greilich and Maxwell, while the visitors boaster the likes of Paul Dickov, Gary McSwegan and Russell Latapy.

However another superb performance and a solitary Boksic goal booked our place in the quarter finals, with Morton our next opponents.

The excellent form continued with a wonderful away victory at Forfar, with three goals inside 11 minutes giving us an imposing lead. Branch opened the scoring after a minute and some clever linking with Boksic let Nicholas double our advantage soon after. Branch pounced on a rebound to make it three and the attacker completed his hat trick by knocking in a Boksic cross to seal our emphatic win on the road and ensure that we remained top of the league pack.

Once again, our performances did not go unrewarded, with Nicholas picking up another Bells Player of the Month award, while I modestly collected the Bells Manager of the Month honour.

With Clyde breathing down our necks in second place, only a point behind us, our game with the Gypsies could not have been bigger. Clague was still suspended and Greilich not quite fit enough for action, but the players were fired up and looking to send the Gypos on their horse and cart with nothing. We got off to a poor start, Shields rocket from 35 yards giving the smelly visitors an early lead, but Boksic soon equalised from close range and a goal from Branch put us ahead. Petric stepped up to stroke home a penalty before Branch made it 4-1 to send Clyde packing from our land with nothing except a warm shower, something that you don’t get at Broadwood....

Enjoy the game!

Alasdair Shaw, Stirling Albion FC Manager

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by coisty:

_Ton announce new boss to lift the Greenock side back to former glory_

After the resignation of "Cowboy" McCormack The Ton was always going to be in search for an equal high profile to take over the helm and continue the path back to the elite of Scottish football.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Its a long and winding path that seems to be spiralling down & down & down......... icon_eek.gif

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by TURPS:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by coisty:

_Ton announce new boss to lift the Greenock side back to former glory_

After the resignation of "Cowboy" McCormack The Ton was always going to be in search for an equal high profile to take over the helm and continue the path back to the elite of Scottish football.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Its a long and winding path that seems to be spiralling down & down & down......... icon_eek.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Its a hard life I suppose, being THIRD BOTTOM an all icon_biggrin.gif

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SimonLichtie:

Alright lads, just wondering if there's any spaces at the moment? I see Dumbarton aren't taken at the moment. If I do take over I cant do any worse than Turps did last season anyway. icon_smile.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Actually at the moment i am doing fine at the moment icon_wink.gif

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Guest sav112

Dumbarton A 2-0

A fantastic away win at the Rock. Iain Mauchlen bagged both goals and was again the stand out player. MoM Thomas Courts held the defence Rock hard only for the other side to crumble. I think the Rock is not so hard these days. A welcome three points.

Stenhousemuir H 2-0

A good performance with Jim Graham MOM and Knox netting our first goal. With one good goal and the other side giving us one it was another good three points. The manager was happy as these points are keeping us with the pack. Amazingly our injuries have been slight till we lost our goalie in this game for 4 weeks.

Morton H 1-0

A excellent win considering the manager rates Morton. It was close all the way and the managers both frantically changed the tactics but MoM Knox was the difference with his winning smile and fantastic goal. Graham and Bell both were first class and our reserve goalie was again great for one so young.

Airdrie A 3-1

The first time we playing Airdrie seen us get out played. And yet again we were poor but to be fair it was a new formation from our home games. Knox cancelled out the diamonds first goal but we were killed by another two goals. A disappointing score that sees us lose ground.

Elgin H 2-2

With a few injuries kicking in and to get a well played for 1 point was welcome. Even at home any points are always hard to get. At 1-2 Gordon was excellent in mid field when called on and even though our second was an own goal we deserved the point.

sav

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PS some prat is deleting my posts and it can’t be because of my wee pic as turps posts light porn on the forum for god sake. If you need to remove the pic but leave the post you arse hole moderator who ever you are.

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Guest sav112

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SimonLichtie:

icon_eek.gificon_eek.gificon_eek.gif Your accusing the great Turps of cheating? icon_eek.gificon_eek.gificon_eek.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

No but he has suddenly rocketed buy winning all his games, and scoring for fun when just last week he was as pish as the rest of us.

It’s a forum tactic he’s downloaded, its got to be either that or he’s actually worked out how to play the dam game unlike the rest of us in the third division.

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by sav112:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SimonLichtie:

icon_eek.gificon_eek.gificon_eek.gif Your accusing the great Turps of cheating? icon_eek.gificon_eek.gificon_eek.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

No but he has suddenly rocketed buy winning all his games, and scoring for fun when just last week he was as pish as the rest of us.

It’s a forum tactic he’s downloaded, its got to be either that or he’s actually worked out how to play the dam game unlike the rest of us in the third division.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Lol icon_biggrin.gif The more u know the less u show icon_wink.gif

At the start of the net game there was not a mad rush to take the most pish team in Scotland. I have had a couple of good session's lately, in nearly two seasons of net game, and the peewees are getting paranoid you gotta laff icon_biggrin.gif

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by sav112:

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PS some prat is deleting my posts and it can’t be because of my wee pic as turps posts light porn on the forum for god sake. If you need to remove the pic but leave the post you arse hole moderator who ever you are.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

LOL icon_biggrin.gif Thats no way to talk about Lord Dogs of the manor! It cant be a mod in the CMO as they dont do anything icon_wink.gif Might be something to do with the new forum code of late Stew so perhaps you better ask someone who knows. With regards to posts and pictures getting deliberately deleted, this would not surprise me.....No one has a sense of humour any more I dont know why we bother icon_rolleyes.gif

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The Spiders Web

Due to last weeks technical difficulties we bring you a double helping of Queens Park goodness this week.

It wasn't the best of starts as we travelled to Station park to take on a well fired up Forfar side in a very one sided game with goals coming from Stewart and Good coupled with a Tosh brace Forfar were well in control before Mackie slotted home a consolation all in all it was a good run out but a very bad performance.

Forfar 4 - 1 Queens Park

Slighty better game as we were at home and welcomed none other than league leaders Clyde to the spiders lair in what was to turn out a sharp contrast from last weeks game against Forfar. Gez Murphy opened the scoring on the 32nd minute and that was later added to when Johann Porhallsson burst through the defence 5 minutes later to make it two with half time approaching Murphy added his 2nd of the afternoon and Queens Parks 3rd that wasn't the end of the action however and deep into injury time at the end of the first half Rollo deflected it past his own keeper to send Queens Park in at the half with a 4 goal lead. Christopher Mackie added to the tally 10 minutes after the restart and again slotted home ten minutes from time.

Queens Park 6 - 0 Clyde

We travelled to Caledonian stadium on a high and it was a high that was to be repaid as Jon Otsemobor opened the scoring 6 minutes in and that was the only highlight until 10 minutes from time as Gez Murphy was adjuged to take Hislop from behind and as a result was sent off with the clocking ticking and Queens Park down to ten men Caley took the game to us and they were hit on a classic counter attack two minutes from time as Steven McAdam settled the score with a nice drilled shot beyond the keeper.

Inverness C.T. 0 - 2 Queens Park

Ah cup games are always special and this was no different as Hamilton Accies came to Hampden on League Cup business and it was Hamilton who took the early advantage from a lackadaisical Queens defence as Kamara drilled the opening goal home and Hamilton looked to be running away with the game as O'Neil added to Accies tally just before half time to send Hamilton 2 nil in at the half, With a change of tactic and a charge of spirit Christopher Mackie slotted home on the hour mark to give Queens Park home but it wasn't till the 83rd minute when Mackie added his 2nd and equilised to give us real hope and 3 minutes later Steven McAdam capped of a wonderful move to round of a 2nd half comeback and to send us into the nest round.

Queens Park 3 - 2 Hamilton

Up to fife we went and the destination was Recreation park the oppenants Alloa Athletic, unfortunatly the game was dull and tedious from both teams point of view and it took a solitary goal from Christopher Mackie to seperate the teams.

Alloa 0 - 1 Queens Park

Gayfield on the horizon and we came back down to earth with a thump as Arbroath ran riot over a very lackadaisical Queens Park side, McMillan opened the scoring on the 6th minute and on the 20th minute the afternoon was summed up perfectly as Paul Reid deflected a shot past his own keeper to give Arbroath a 2 goal lead. Keeling added to the scoreline 60 seconds into the restart and that was the end of the game with a few chances on we didn't take any and that was the way the game ended.

Arbroath 3 - 0 Queens Park

League cup business again as the 3rd round came a calling as St Mirren were the favourites to go through into the quarter finals. Gez Murphy however had other ideas when he opened the scoring on the stroke of half time before St Mirren equalised a minute after the restart, St Mirren had the upper hand and we were lucky at times to keep the score level so when Campbell headed the ball past his keeper to give us the lead in bizarre fashion to say the goal came against the run of play is a slight understatement. That however gave us hope and Gez Murphy added his 2nd and Queens Parks 3rd 5 minutes later and that was the way the game was to finish.

Queens Park 3 - 1

Back at Hampden and back to league business as Berwick Rangers came calling in a game that seen Eddie Annand return from injury and claim his first start of the season and the stage was set as 20 minutes in Annand opened the scoring with a rasping drive from the edge of the area past a helpless Berwick keeper but sadly that was the end of the scoring from our view and McCormick who equilised for Berwick on the stroke of half time and that was the end of the scoring and the end of the game.

Queens Park 1 - 1 Berwick

Hampden was the venue once again and Hamilton were the team with revenge on their mind and it was Hamilton who took the early iniative with a good move and a solid finish from Russell 19 minutes in however they were to be denied by Gez Murphy who brought the scoreline level 5 minutes later and Mackie put Queens Park ahead on the half hour mark. The second half started and Hamilton looked to take the game to us in hope of gaining atleast a point but it wasn't to be as Gez Murphy added his second of the afternoon to wrap up the points for the home team.

Queens Park 3 - 1 Hamilton

Until next time

Gary Toner

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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by TURPS:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by sav112:

**********************************

PS some prat is deleting my posts and it can’t be because of my wee pic as turps posts light porn on the forum for god sake. If you need to remove the pic but leave the post you arse hole moderator who ever you are.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

LOL icon_biggrin.gif Thats no way to talk about Lord Dogs of the manor! It cant be a mod in the CMO as they dont do anything icon_wink.gif Might be something to do with the new forum code of late Stew so perhaps you better ask someone who knows. With regards to posts and pictures getting deliberately deleted, this would not surprise me.....No one has a sense of humour any more I dont know why we bother icon_rolleyes.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

What alot of písh you talk Rosco, yer gonna have to think before presuming icon_wink.gif

Do i sense a Tommy Sheridan rebelious nature to your character!!!

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Guest sav112

Enough is enough, yet another post deleted. The mods are seemingly poor in this forum. I know its not one of the big forums but still who ever the mods it would only take too minutes to say why they are getting deleted.

Sorry I lost my notes on that last session so the actions of the mod who is probably a wee spotty Virgin has made the clan forum that little bit poorer. Turps can we move our post to your web site because apart from the poor quality forum ie no Avatars and the preference to tell me if any posts have been added does not work posts and the fact you cant edit posts which has to be the mother of them all.

The forum could learn a bit from a few of the huge forums.

http://www.cncgames.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?s=&forumid=2

http://forums.rebel****.com/ubb/ultimatebb.php?ubb=forum;f=1

I’ll try and find the notes as I am sure I saved them. But that prat boy would probably delete it anyway.

Sav.

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