Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Ok. Cast your attention down south for a bit, England that is, think red and white stripes. If you are thinking Southampton, well you are kinda right. Look about seven miles north, between the hubs of activity that are Eastleigh and Winchester lies the sleepy Hampshire village of Colden Common, population approx 2000. For such a tiny village, their local football club has a proud history, their roots laying firmly in the 19th century. The club as it currently exists was formed in 1956. Starting in the Eastleigh local league trophies where unfortunately sparse with only the Eastleigh benevolent cup (1965) and the Junior Div 4 title the following year. In 1970 however, the decision was made to field a Sunday team, this proved a pivotal moment as in ten years, the Sunday set up collected 24 league and cup trophies between the two teams. Colden Common then became full Hampshire league members in 1984/85 in Div 3, promotion to Div 2 came instantly and then instant promotion to Div 1. Junior leagues to Hants Div 1 in 6 years! Not bad!! Then in 1991/92, the teams proudest moment came. Tiny Colden Common, playing on a recreation ground won the Hampshire league, promotion to the Wessex league however did not come, due to ground grading, and this has been a somewhat sticky point for the club, preventing additional progress and indeed resulting in relegation in 2000. Imagine though…… If they had been able to develop their ground in 1992, Floodlights, stands and snack bars could have been built on the Recreation Ground….. Where could they be now? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Ok. Cast your attention down south for a bit, England that is, think red and white stripes. If you are thinking Southampton, well you are kinda right. Look about seven miles north, between the hubs of activity that are Eastleigh and Winchester lies the sleepy Hampshire village of Colden Common, population approx 2000. For such a tiny village, their local football club has a proud history, their roots laying firmly in the 19th century. The club as it currently exists was formed in 1956. Starting in the Eastleigh local league trophies where unfortunately sparse with only the Eastleigh benevolent cup (1965) and the Junior Div 4 title the following year. In 1970 however, the decision was made to field a Sunday team, this proved a pivotal moment as in ten years, the Sunday set up collected 24 league and cup trophies between the two teams. Colden Common then became full Hampshire league members in 1984/85 in Div 3, promotion to Div 2 came instantly and then instant promotion to Div 1. Junior leagues to Hants Div 1 in 6 years! Not bad!! Then in 1991/92, the teams proudest moment came. Tiny Colden Common, playing on a recreation ground won the Hampshire league, promotion to the Wessex league however did not come, due to ground grading, and this has been a somewhat sticky point for the club, preventing additional progress and indeed resulting in relegation in 2000. Imagine though…… If they had been able to develop their ground in 1992, Floodlights, stands and snack bars could have been built on the Recreation Ground….. Where could they be now? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 News Report. The Non-league paper June 23rd 2002 <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Village Cheer as Common Promotion Confirmed. Colden Common FC, winners of this years Southern league premier title have had their promotion to the conference confirmed today after having their Main Road ground passed as being fit for conference football. Treasurer Janet Lissenden was quoted earlier this week as saying, ‘What a fantastic day for the village and indeed the club, that we have got this chance is a testament to the loyalty and commitment of all concerned.’ Tiny Common, who have enjoyed a well publicised rise through the English non-league pyramid have shocked the Southern league with their well organised, flowing football. The table below shows their excellent league record over the past ten years, which has seen them graduate from county to national level. 1991/92 – Hampshire Div 1, Champions 1992/93 – Wessex league, 12th 1993/94 – Wessex league, 3rd 1994/95 – Wessex league, Champions (Promotion denied due to Ground grading) 1995/96 – Wessex league, Champions 1996/97 – Southern League East, 14th 1997/98 – Southern League East, 15th 1998/99 – Southern League East, 3rd 1999/00 – Southern League East, Champions 2000/01 – Southern League Premier, 12th 2001/02 – Southern League Premier, Champions Manager Steve Waters was unavailable to comment on the news. However club Physio Nigel Light passed on how delighted both Waters and Chairman Cliff Banford where at the news. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Time to introduce some characters. Colin Brown – Myself, a village resident since 1994. And take a passing interest in the Team, although I am primarily a Southampton and Margate fan. Nick Carr – One of my best mates, a drinking buddy and comrade from my 6th form college, great bloke. Michael King ‘Kinger’ – Former Chairman of Colden Common FC, now runs the local pub on the road opposite Main Road. Great bloke, a bit of a wheeler dealer, but that just adds to his irrepressible character. James Burgess – Another mate, met him in the local. Nice guy, just finished university. Sunday June 23rd, The Black Horse Pub. Colden Common Finished work at Southampton airport for the day, serving drinks can take its toll, so I feel it prudent to swap one bar for another. Me, ‘Alright all.’ Kinger, Nick, James, ‘Alright mate.’ Kinger, ‘You heard the news Col?’ C, ‘No, Reads newspaper…. ,Ah, excellent. Conference football next year!’ J, ‘Yeah, you’ll be able to see that crap lot down here this season!’ C, ‘will be good to see the ‘Gate here next year. Whats the story about Muddy (Steve Waters) not being available then, that’s not like him.?’ N, ‘Yeah tis a bi……….. (Kinger interrupts) K, ‘Who knows Col….’ C, ‘You two know summat here don’t you?’ N, ‘Wot????? Fool! Fancy a game o darts?’ C, ‘Yeah……… go on, Mickey mouse ok?’ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Non League Paper, 30th June 2002 <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Chairman and Manager arrested in India! In unprecedented circumstances. Colden Common manager Steve Waters and chairman Cliff Banford where arrested. The circumstances behind their arrest are unclear. In the interim former chairman Michael King has been installed to run club affairs. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> The Black Horse, 30th June, 9.20pm James is behind the bar, Me and Nick are chatting when we are joined by Kinger. Kinger, ‘Evening lads.’ Nick, ‘Evenin’, How did you swing that earlier today then….?’ Colin, ‘Swing what.?’ K, ‘You havn’t heard Col, I’m chairman again!’ C, ‘No, I’ve been at work…… what, chairman of Common?’ Kinger smiles, and sips his pint. C, ‘NAAHHHH!!!! Fair play!’ It becomes evident the Kinger has been drinking throughout the day, not that me and Nick mind, we had every intention of getting drunk too, but he has obviously been thinking with it………. K, ‘Now lads…. (Colin – oh, here we go….) ……I’ll be fair wit ya, I’m getting on a bit, and I have never been the best football manager, we need a new one.’ N, ‘Anyone in mind?’ K, ‘That’s where you two come in………. I have no money to run the club, It will just about break even, with all the business trying to free Muddy and Cliff I need someone who is willing to do the job in the interim until we can get them back.’ Me and Nick look at each other, if this is heading where we think its heading….. K, ‘I know you two know a fair bit about the game, so I was wondering, would you lads like to run the team!’ Nick decides to speak for both of us at this point. N, ‘How many have you had Michael???’ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 So, that was pretty much everything sorted. I was going to university that autumn but decided to defer entry for a year, see how everything goes with the team. Nick was already taking a gap year anyhow, so there was no problem there. Deciding who would be manager was a conversation that lasted the rest of that Sunday evening. Kinger interviewed us there and then, in full view of the other regulars and an obviously envious James. I just edged the position on the basis that by following Margate my knowledge of the Non-league scene would be slightly better then Bournemouth fan Nick! (I knew it would come in handy at some point!) Nick was then appointed as Assistant Manager, I made it up to him by buying him pint. (Gotta keep the subordinates sweet!) At the end of the evening I looked through our current squad, only then did the size of our task become apparent…….. (Not a good idea generally to read after 6 pints though, let’s be fair here.) (Technical Note, The game will be played on CM01/02 v2.9.67. Leigh RMI have been replaced by Common. And yes, a copious amount of editing has been done. If this crashes do not be surprised.) Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Colden Common Statistics Chairman; Michael King Manager; Colin Brown Assistant Manager; Nick Carr Coach; James Burgess (Gave the lad a job! ) Physio; Nigel Light Stadium; Main Road Recreation Ground Colden Common Winchester Hampshire Capacity, 3000 (15 Seated) Squad. Goalkeepers; Michael Broach, 36. Loyal Commoner, has a lot of first team experience. But approaching the end of his career. Marc Cole, 21. First Choice keeper last year, shouldn’t change this. Bags of potential. Defenders; David Burgess, 19 James’ brother. Versatile player, due to our small squad will be a main player. Stuart Curtis, 20 Not the best of players, plays on both flanks, but will get games out of necessity. Sean Lahey, 31 Very, experienced, Possible for captaincy, Will play at the heart of our defence. Simon Lemon, 25 I rate him, left or right side defender/d – mid. Will get games. Jason Stock, 38 Aging, but useful. Plays left or centre of defence. Jim Heart, 22 Excellent prospect. Straight in the centre of defence. I will expect good things from him. Midfield Byron Ghariban, 30 Quite a defensive player. Should shaw up our defensive capabilities while providing up front. James Atterbury, 17 Very young, room to improve, plays on the right. Lee Kelly, 20 Young, right sided player. I expect him to perform well. Simon Stillwell, 21 Can play on both wings. Very highly rated by many. Certainly will be a first team regular. Chris Sanger, 23 Will play in the centre, despite his inclination to play on the wings. Should provide ample support for the strikers. Strikers Dean Higgins, 30 Second choice striker. Although I’m not expecting miracles. Richard Lang, 31 Third Choice striker, but will get his chances. Again I am not too sure of his potential. Noureddine Maamria, 27 Our only summer signing, on a free from relegated Leigh RMI. Proven at this level and first choice all the way. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Oh dear, our squad is tiny. We have little in the way of money, and our stadium is…… A field with a wall around it and some benches. (This was conference graded HOW!!!!) Oh well, I had my first team sorted in my mind. After a few friendlies I would have a better idea of how things could go. The Non-League Paper. July 6th 2002 <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Two former 6th Form students, Colin Brown 18, and Nick Carr 18 have been unveiled as the new management team at Colden Common. Brown has been appointed as manager and his drinking partner Carr is the new assistant manager. Sources close to the Club have been describing their anger at this seemingly absurd appointment. Physio Nigel Light was quoted as saying; ‘Your having a f**king laugh right?’ Michael King, the interim chairman however insisted ‘they are good lads, have keen footballing brains and are obviously capable, give them a chance.’ Rival Manager Colin Addison refused to comment on rumours that he fell of of his office chair when he heard the news. More reaction on page 21……….. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian of Nazareth Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Good Stuff so far KUTGW Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Brian of Nazareth: Good Stuff so far KUTGW<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Cheers mate. Hopefully this will turn out better then my still born Fiorentina Story. Any resemblance characters hold to their real selves is partially intended. I thank you. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobBev Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 I'm looking forward to following this one Saint as I live fairly near Winchester. Any chance of some free tickets Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghostwriter Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 I like the look of this . I used to live close to this area and went to school just outside Romsey . And I am pretty sure I must have driven through Colden Common a few times in my life as well.. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 Cheers lads, I'm actually at uni in Coventry at the moment, so this story is trying to halt my homesickness. Keep reading. Friendlies where arranged to play Eastleigh on 21st July, Basingstoke on 4th August and Havant & Waterlooville on 11th August. After that in our first Conference game we would be away to Northwich Victoria. Kinger seemingly giving me a few local teams to cut my teeth with first. Black Horse 20th July 2002 Its just gone 11pm, most have left the pub apart from me, Nick, Kinger and James. K, ‘Decided the team yet?’ C, ‘Yeah, its on the back of this beer matt.’ J, ‘Oh great, very professional!! Hehehe.’ K, ‘What sort of f**king formation do you call that!....’ N, ‘Er, yeah Colin. This isn’t champman!’ My squad for the first friendly against Eastleigh followed a 4-1-3-2 formation. Maamria-Higgins Kelly – Stillwell – Sanger Ghariban Stock – Lahey – Hart – Lemon Cole Friendly, 21st July. Colden Common v Eastleigh Town Eastleigh started slightly the better, but against the run of play Sanger scored on 8. Eastleigh struck back on 11 minutes with a fine goal for Jordan. Maamria was fine throughout, scoring on the 28th minute. It became 3-1 on 33 minutes after Stillwell headed in from a corner. HT 3-1 The second half couldn’t live up to the lively first. Eastleigh pressed through out but conceded a fourth after 63 minutes. The game then died somewhat. Although Maamria received a right hook from Eastleigh defender White which the referee somehow missed. FT. Colden Common 4-1 Eastleigh Sanger, 8 Maamria, 28, 68 Stillwell, 33 MOM – D. Maamria (No arguments there! This man could be our saviour.) As I walked into a packed Black Horse after the game a small cheer went up. Could it be that public favour could be swaying towards my appointment, or while I was ****ed last night did I promise everyone a drink on event of victory? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 The Black Horse, 2nd August Me and Nick are playing Darts, I’m a little short on money after buying the entire pub a drink a few days back, but I’m managing to scrape a few pints together. Kinger is out for the evening with his girlfriend and James, well….. we can’t be sure. N, ‘Flukey b*stard!’ C, ‘All skill mate, all skill. Any thoughts about the Basingstoke game?’ N, ‘Away and tougher opposition. Should be interesting.’ C, ‘I’m keeping the same team, let them gel in time for the new season.’ N, ‘No, you did that because you couldn’t be arsed to change it.’ C, ‘Sshhhhh, Anyway, your round.’ N, ‘WHAT! Oh go on then…’ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 Friendly, 4th August Basingstoke v Colden Common Our first ever away fixture, with an unchanged side. Again we started poorly, but eventually got a foothold and on 16 minutes Sanger put a cross in. Maamria got hold of it and buried the ball past the keeper. Straight off the kick off though a pass down the wing left us standing and Millerick found the top corner after an excellent bit of play. HT, 1-1 The second half mainly consisted of me biting my nails. Basignstoke where all over us. A fine performance by Jason Stock kept our defence together when it seemed we would fall apart. In the 80th minute we got back into the game and where just denied a second after some good keeping from Basingstoke. And that was it. FT, 1-1 Maamria, 16 MOM, Jason Stock. Well deserved after a highly impressive game for the veteran. Overall I was happy, Nick had fallen asleep at half time, but James took over in his roll in the Second half. Kinger seemed ok on it, but was appalled at the state of the Beer in the Basingstoke club house. I must admit, I never knew lager and pipe cleaner shared the same taste. Phonecall, 6th August 2002 I answer my phone at about midday. Unknown, ‘Colin, Its José’ (Oh shÃt, its my boss from the airport! BOLLOX, my job, I totally forgot!!!!) C, ‘José, hi, how are you listen I………’ J, ‘Yes, we heard about your new job, don’t worry, we have filled your position here, our new barman is more then capable. He seems a bit too attached to the idea of changing barrels and some white stains have appeared in the cellar, but hey. I’m sure he’s just trying to get rid of the pigeons he’s been going on about.’ C, ‘Pigeons………… right. So why are you ringing then.’ J, ‘Well, I’m ringing on behalf of Aramark, our owner company. They want to set up a catering facility in your club, we hear the contract had ran out…’ C, ‘Listen José, I’m really not the man to be talking to, I’ll give you Kingers number, he’ll sort you out.’ J, ‘Kinger…….???’ C, ‘Michael King, sorry. The chairman.’ J, ‘Ok, excellent. Speak soon, oh yeah, your P45 is in the post.’ C, ‘Ok, cya.’ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 11th August, 10am I get to the clubhouse to prepare for the game, but a familiar voice gets my attention. Unknown, ‘COLIN!’ A female figure jumps on me, hello Laura! Laura Saunders, A former colleague from Southampton Airport, she worked in the Café while I did the bar. Sweet girl, very cheeky and flirty. But its all good! She is 17 and is her approaching her last year of 6th form. L, ‘’Ello!!!!’ C, ‘Blimey, what are you doing here! Should you be down the… L, ‘Airport, yeah. You remember Jose called you. Aramark have taken over the catering here. And I received a transfer, along with Annie.’ A, ‘Hello Colin.’ Antoinette ‘Annie’ Howard, another former colleague. Worked full time at the airport but is my age. Now she is in full time charge of Colden Common FC catering! C, ‘I have to go sorry, You two fancy a drink after the game?’ L + A, ‘Sure!’ C, ‘Sweet, see you then.’ Friendly, 11th August Colden Common v Havant and Waterlooville Final friendly before the conference season. I am optimistc, however, before the game Nigel Light, our physio came up to me and voiced his concerns at the way I was running the club. Arguing I wasn’t taking the opportunity to give all our players a run out. I dismiss his suggestion arguing we need to give the lads a chance to gel. But he was quite insistent he knew what was best. Oh well, The only change was Burgess for Hart, I’ll give him a go. On to the game. We again suffered a poor start, but held out, Burgess blocking the first shot of the game. Then around 20 minutes it was all us, but a goal couldn’t go in. From then on though it was all Havant, constant pressure over the course of a ten minute period resulted in a well deserved Goal for Haughton on 44 minutes. HT 0-1 I gave the lads a right bollocking at half time, and it showed, they got stuck in at the start of the second and Kelly found the net after 52 minutes following a deflected shot by Higgins. Havant pulled the game back in their favour on 61st minute with an O’Rourke shot, but again we showed spirit and got straight back into it. Applying a fifteen minute spell of constant pressure bringing another equaliser on 73 minutes through Maamria. It was very scrappy thereafter and finished all square. FT 2-2 Kelly 52 Maamria 73 MOM, Maamria, that man again! A highly impressive and determined performance. I had a drink with Annie and Laura after the game as promised, but Nick was conspicuous by his absence. James was however behind the bar and Kinger chatting with his mates at one of the tables. L, ‘You didn’t win, blimey you must be crap! ’ C, ’Ah well, it was a draw, that’ll do me.’ L, ‘Yeah, no injuries, spose so. ’ A, ‘You’ll be getting attention from the ladies around the village I suppose now!?’ C, ‘Give over gal! anyway, far too busy managing and drinking!............ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 The Non League Paper 12th August <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Conference Preview (extract) Colden Common FC Well, who would have thought ten years ago that this tiny set up could make the conference, echoing the achievements of teams such as Leigh RMI, Forrest Green and indeed the old Wimbledon set up. This team have risen from county to national level in a decade. They are however under the guidance of a very young and inexperienced management team, have a minimal squad and a stadium which really is nothing more then a glorified field. While we wish the Commoners well and despite their competent pre season form, we are expecting a tough time for them at this level. NLP Prediction, 22nd. Back to the DML next year. In, D. Maamria. Free Out, Manager Steve Waters <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> However, also found in the same edition was this………. <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Waters and Banford return to Main Road. Just as we went to print this story was breaking. After being freed last week from an Indian Jail, Steve Waters and Cliff Banford return to Colden Common after a month of absence. However it seems doubtful whether they will regain control of the Hampshire outfit. More on this story in next weeks Non-League Paper. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 12th August 2002 I go to the club house, and find Cliff Banford, Steve Waters and Kinger engaged in conversation. I quietly enter….. K, ‘well we will just have to reach some kind of….. oh, alright Col. You’ve met Muddy and Cliff before havn’t you.’ CB, ‘Alright Lad, Colin Brown? Pleasure to meet you lad. Thankyou for looking after the management side while we’ve been awa…..’ K, ‘Cliff, you are not going to tell him to step down.’ CB, ‘What? Its my clu…..’ K, ‘You remember the contracts we signed, in event of any problems with the old bill, I run matters.’ CB, ‘But that was in event of Jail, not this!’ SW, ‘Wait……… you said nothing about this Cliff…’ K, ‘Could you just leave us to it for a bit Col.’ C, ‘Yeah yeah, sure.’ Knowing the Black Horse won’t be open for a bit, I head down to the Fishers Pond, I need a pint after that…… (any excuse ) Southampton Daily Echo. 13th August 2002 <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> COMMON TO REMAIN UNDER KING CONTROL In an astonishing turn of events, Michael King will take over as full time chairman of Colden Common FC. Ex Chairman Cliff Banford is quoted as saying he lost the club ‘on a technicality’ and is ‘wholly gutted’ to have lost control on the run up to the clubs first season in the Nationwide Conference. King's first steps as full time chairman was to announce the Steve Waters has been sacked as club manager and the Interim management team of Nicholas Carr and Colin Brown will continue in the positions they have both held for the last month. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Well how about that!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 So, I’m an 18 year old Alcoholic, and am a full time manager of a conference team. Not an especially big one granted, but even so. Not bad considering my far from incredible A level results! Another point, surely I’m the only manger in English football who still lives with his parents? Oh well, hopefully I can make enough out of the club to buy a flat or summat local. Nick and James seems quite happy in their roles in the club, more time down the pub and living a dream! (almost). And Kinger, well, I have never seen a man with a bigger swing in his step, he had forever gone on about the tiny little village of Chelsea taking on the whole of North, South, and East London and coming out of it with honour! Perhaps a proper village outfit can now do the same! Anyway enough of this daydreaming, I have a team to pick, oh….. And I wonder what Laura is doing next Tuesday night! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gricehead Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 Superb stuff! I shall be following this one closely, looks like it could be a classic! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 19, 2003 Share Posted March 19, 2003 Wouldn't quite go that far Gricehead!!! Coming soon, the start of the season and more boardroom revelations? Who knows! This teams run from the local pub! Stay tuned folks. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 It was rather quiet on the build up to the Northwich game, sure I was nervous, but thankfully the lager was keeping it from coming to the surface. Previous Tuesday had been cool. I didn’t go out with Laura you understand, she was washing her hair, but me and Nick had a kick about in Colden Common park. Shame the players where watching really……I have never been able to kick a ball properly, the looks on their faces was a total picture! So, Saturday came, we got on our bus, watched the odd film (ok 3, we got stuck in traffic, twice!) Barely made it to the Drill Field on time, gave the lads chance for a quick warm up and gave them a talking too before the game. I was told however by Lahey, my captain, that the words, ‘Just ‘ave em will ya!’ will probably not cut it for the remaining 41 fixtures this season!!! On that note……. Nationwide Conference, 18th August 2002 Northwich Victoria v Colden Common For the first game of my so far short reign we started rather brightly, Kelly, Stillwell and Sanger combining well to create so early attacking pressure. For the first half hour we dominated, but just couldn’t put the bloody thing away! Three guesses what happened………GOAL! For Northwich, their first attack of the game and McNiven beats Cole with an absolute rocket. The lads seem fired up by this and continue their pressure, and it finally pays off on the turn of half time. Sanger made the goal, making an incisive forward run, making it into the Northwich area, only for Rioch to takle him, but rather then cleared the ball ended up at the feet of Higgins….. WHACK! 1-1. HT, 1-1 The first ten minutes of the second half went as the rest of the game had so far gone, constant common pressure, and Sanger got his reward after the first half assist, and excellent volley from a deep cross left the Vics keeper stranded. This goal seemd to make us relax though, despite my constant shouting the players wouldn’t, or should that be couldn’t get any headway. Vics gained in power over the remainder of the game and quite frankly battered us! We somehow survived though, the unbelievable had happened. The 20 or so fans who had made the long trip from Hampshire where in raptures…… We had won our first Conference game! FT, 1-2 Higgins 45 Sanger 55 MOM, McNiven, well deserved for the Northwich man. Att, 875 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 That night in the Black Horse (we got back at 10pm!!!!) It was electric, Laura planted a lovely big kiss on me as soon as I walked through the door, a huge cheer went up, and it seemed as though my previous favour was being redressed. I was being bought drinks left right and centre! Unfortunately I remember little from 11.30 onwards. It was perhaps however a little unfair for the playing squad to strip me naked in full view of everyone, tie me to the goal posts in Main Road with a Colden Common shirt and the write on my forehead ‘Kiss me, I’m French!’ I mastermind our first conference victory and they still hate me. I was found next morning by Kinger. K, ‘Col…… OI, COLIN!!!!!!’ Slaps me round the face to wake me up a bit. C, ‘Huh…………#yawn#’ K, ‘What the f**k you doing out here!!!!’ C, ‘Good god! I swear there is a bloody Elephant on top of my head!!!’ K, ‘You where knocking them back a bit last night, not surprised, to be fair you didn’t spend a penny on it though.’ C, ‘Yeah, I did get a drink from everyone didn’t I!!!!’ K, ‘Well, not everyone. The players, James and Nige left you to it.’ C, ‘Hang on… I’m f**cking nude here.’ K, ‘No shÃt big man! You must be wánkered if you have only just noticed that. Your clothes and wallet are in the pub.’ C, ‘Good, I better check my mobile.’ K, ‘Erm Col, you really don’t wanna know where they stuck that!’ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 Over the next two days I found my phone, and then promptly regained my ability to walk in a straight line. (When I find out who did that…!!!) The next game was a Tuesday night fixture, our first Home game of the season, and against Doncaster Rovers, a former league set up. I was certainly not expecting anything…… Not that I let on to the players. My team talk was a bit more direct this time, I promised I would make each player eat a section of my old phone fascia should we lose! Considering my optimism, it was a prospect to savour……. Nationwide Conference, 21st August 2002 Colden Common v Doncaster Doncaster where sprightly from the off, but we got in the first good attack, Maamria unleashing two shots in quick succession after a great through ball from Stock. That was however it as far as our first half was concerned, Doncaster proceeded to grip the game with a vice like grip and make it theirs. Somehow though (and I really don’t know how) We made it to half time, but as far as I could tell they had about 10 shots on target! HT, 0-0 From the Kick Off it seemed as if we where different players, either way I was certain the word ‘Nokia’ would never again feature in my half time rant. And sure enough it inspired the players. Higgins in particular was lifted and went on an amazing solo run on the 58th minute, beating three defenders in the process and the keeper, to give us a shock lead. This trend continued through the half, Doncaster, our feared adversaries where all at sea. We didn’t score anymore, but It was a performance that ended with a rousing cheer from the home faithful at full time. FT, 1-0 Higgins, 58 MOM, Higgins, Michael Owen couldn’t have done better then that goal - I swear it! Att, 1286 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 I decided to spend the following day at home. I left Nick in charge of training (well, of Maamria, he being our only full timer….) and indulged myself with a few lagers. At 11 am however, my phone rang….. C, ‘Hello?’ Unknown, ‘Hello, Mister Brown?’ C, ‘Yes, who’s speaking.’ U, ‘This is Liam Fredericks, a reporter for the Non-League Paper, we where wondering if you would be available for an interview tomorrow?’ C, ‘Blimey….. yes, of course I’m available, what time would you be over?’ LF, ‘About 3 in the afternoon. At the Clubhouse?’ C, ‘Perfect, I’ll look forward to it, thankyou.’ LF, ‘No! Thankyou!!!’ An interview!!!!! Well, hopefully this will help me to get a bit of support from the locals and the players. Sweet! The interview. We are sitting at a table in the Clubhouse, Liam is drinking a coffee while I am indulging myself with an ice cold diet coke (yes, Coke, and diet!) LF, ‘So Colin, you have to admit your appointment as manager is quite unusual.’ C, ‘Yes, yes it is, but I have this chance, if I refused it it might have never happened again.’ LF, ‘Very true, now you are…….’ C, ‘Drunk?’ LF, ‘er no, How old are you?’ C, ‘OH, right yes I’m 18.’ LF, ‘Has that caused any problems in dealing with the players?’ C, ‘They are quite understandably sceptical of what guidance a man younger then any member of the squad can bring, but I think as we establish ourselves this problem will pass’ LF, ‘Rival managers are saying you have no chance of surviving this season, both in this Job and in the Conference, how do you feel about that.’ C, ‘Hmmmm, dunno really.’ LF, ‘Ok……………………………….’ (I can tell he is finding me hardly the most inspiring interviewee he’s ever had.) LF, ‘Is there anything you would like to say to rival managers?’ C, ‘Well, apart from wishing Chris Kinnear and Margate good luck for the season no, not really!’ LF, ‘You are wishing Margate good luck!?!?!?!’ C, ‘Yeah, I’m a fan. Followed them for years.’ LF, ‘Ok, fair enough.’ C, ‘Yep.’ LF, ‘Look, I’m not going to print this interview…. To be honest I don’t think you have a clue what you are doing here. You are wishing a rival team good luck ffs!!!!!’ C, ‘Ok, well, it was your waste of a trip…….And please, I am my own person, I don’t abide by any conventions just because the media expect me too! OK!??’ LF, ‘Sure….. Well good luck Lad.’ C, ‘Thankyou.’ To say I was upset by this would be an understatement…………… Kinger, who was listening to what was going on came over. K, ‘Col, I know you mean well, but you need to be friendly to the media if you are to stand any chance.’ C, ‘I know Kinger, but I’ve never been the best people person.’ K, ‘Just think, if this is how you deal with the Non League press, imagine what you would be like with the tabloids!’ With that I just sigh. He was right, I am woefully under prepared in many ways for this type of job. My GCSE’s and A levels meant nothing now…….. …….On the bright side though I’m moving into my own place. Even if it is just a flat above the old Post Office! Its close to the ground, has room for all my stuff and an ample size fridge!! Now then, what was that??? OH, the Telford game on Saturday, right…….. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 I was in the pub on Friday night, I was again going to pick an unchanged side, Nick was in Winchester having a night out with a young lady. (She said she was a fan of the team, but its my suspicion that she would run at the merest mention of the offside rule!!) To my surprise, I am joined by Dave Burgess and Sean Lahey, two of the Players. Indeed, Shaun is the club captain! D, ‘Mind if we Join you Col?’ C, ‘Yeah sure mate (We had been friends before I became boss) S, ‘Look, erm, Boss (He was obviously uneasy saying this… I let it go) I’m sure you know that most of the lads don’t really respect your skills as a manager, however, I feel it important I say what needs to be said.’ I was taken a back a bit by this…… what could he mean???? S, ‘Look, your formation you gave us, is…. Strange! But its been a master stroke!!! I have never seen us play as well, You have my full support. Just give the lads a bit of time, they will get there.’ C, ‘Sean, cheers. I’m honoured…… thankyou.’ D, ‘Now come on Col. Lets play a few games of Pool.’ C, ‘Sure, cheers.’ Make no mistake, that me feel so much better! Time to prepare for the trip to New Bucks Head! [This message was edited by The Margate Saint on 20 March 2003 at 17:13.] Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 Nationwide Conference, 25th August 2002 Telford v Colden Common If I was to be worried about how the lads would play, I soon realised I had no reason to, Kelly received a through ball from Lemon after a mere 24 seconds, unleashed a powerful strike only for Telford keeper Knowles to parry it….. straight to the feet of Higgins! We lead after a mere 35 seconds!!!! Telford where understandably perturbed by this and got back into the game slowly over the next 10 minutes and got their just deserts with a Lormor shot into our top corner. Nick seemed quite fired up by the Telford onslaught on joined me in shouting his lungs out at any player in earshot. This had the desired effect, Burgess scored on 24 minutes, his contribution was sadly short lived after the goal as he went off injured on 26 minutes. The half degenerated thereafter into a series of midfield skirmishes, until, in injury time, Kelly gained possession, went on a storming run chipped the ball over the defence for young lad Atterbury to volley the ball past the hapless keeper. HT 1-3 My disbelief at the score line provided a quite muted half time talk (that’s right, talk, not rant!) and we continued as we left off, dominating Telford in midfield and on 58 minutes Maamria converted another volley, this time delivered by a cross from Atterbury. By this point Telford just seemed to give up, they failed to string any more then 3 passes together, mind you we where now no better. No matter what I could say the players just decided to play exhibition esque football. I gave up in the end and just savoured the scoreline. We managed another one before the end and to be fair it was a belter, Lahey converted a free kick from 20 yards, beautiful. That was pretty much it. Speachless is not the word….. FT 1-5 Higgins 1 Burgess, 24 Atterbury, 46 Maamria, 58 Lahey, 83 MOM, Atterbury, Fantastic play from the youngster. Drinks are on him! Att, 861 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 After we got back to the Black, the reaction from the players astounded me. Many of them shook my hand, where generally quite respectful and indeed, for the first time as a team, started referring to me as ‘Boss’. I tried to tell them this couldn’t last, they all agreed but I just couldn’t help but wonder if this was a false dawn. Not to worry for the short term though. As I woke up the following morning I couldn’t help notice something quite unexpected! I WAS IN MY OWN BED. They hadn’t taken advantage of my quite drunken state, indeed as I later discovered Nick had received the goal post treatment….. Something else soon occurred to me too, I wasn’t alone. I looked over my shoulder and to my total surprise I looked straight into the eyes of a not unattractive young woman….!!!! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 20, 2003 Share Posted March 20, 2003 Young woman, ‘Well good morning Sexy, thought you’d never wake up….’ C, ‘Errrrrrr, Hi?’ YW, ‘Bless. You’re all hungover, hang on, I’ll get you some coffee.’ (Ok, she knows where the Kitchen is, and judging by the state of (un)dress she was in when she left my bed she probably knows quite a fair bit more about me as well! On the bright side she didn’t know I absolutely despise coffee…… ) YW, ‘What, NO COFFEE!!?? What kind of flat is this?’ (Right, who is she, erm, ID, she must have some ID with her, I know. Drivers License. It really isn’t right to go through a ladies bag, but this is a desperate situation, and for all I know she might not exactly be an honourable lady!) C, ‘Its near the sink…….’ YL, ‘WOT?’ C, ‘Keep looking for the Coffee, its by the sink…….’ (That should stall her, right purse…… A-HA, drivers license we have a Ms, erm…..Morris……Eve Morris, she is erm, 22! Nicely done Col! And she is from….. Andover. Ok… OH SHÃT! She’s coming…..) E, ‘Couldn’t find any Coffee, got you some tea instead.’ C, ‘Ok cheers, Eve… erm….’ E, ‘You remembered my name! I am impressed, the state you where in last night you could hardly stand up….’ C, ‘Yeah, of course I remember your name, but erm, If I was that bad errr how did I??’ E, ‘We didn’t do anything, don’t be silly. We would have if it wasn’t for your drunkenness though.’ C, ‘Ok, listen, er, I really enjoyed last night though (what I can remember…. Ok I can’t remember a thing, but she has one hell of a nice arse! ) And erm, would you like to do anything sometime?’ E, ‘Sure, I’ll txt you tomorrow.’ C, ‘You have my number? E, ‘Yes, and you have mine too…….. you bloody pÃss head you! Now I gotta go to work, take care, I’ll show myself out.’ Blimey, I certainly didn’t expect that!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gricehead Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 See, classic! Told you... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Nationwide Conference, 29th August 2002 Colden Common v Scarborough Right from the Kick off we looked shoddy, no commitment, no passion well…. You get the idea. For the first 30 minutes Scarborough controlled, with a goal for Ormerod on 8 and Pounder on 24. They sat back after that but we continued to be absolutely atrocious. HT 0-2 Second half, and well. Same as the end of the first half. Scarborough managed the odd attack here and there, but it was really shocking stuff. We managed a goal in the last Minute, Higgins with a lucky tap in but in truth it was undeserved. FT 1-2 Higgins, 90 MOM, Ormerod. Best player on the pitch by miles was the Scarborough man, but that’s not saying much. Att, 1388 After the game I just locked the changing room door as soon as the players all got in. Slipped a note under the door which had the word ‘disgrace’ written on it and went home. My instructions to the groundsman where to open the door at 7 o’ clock. On a brighter note Eve send me a text message the preceding thursday evening, spoke to her soon after, turns out she’s a journalist for the Echo! Kinger was on about being friendly to the media, but I’m sure he didn’t mean like that. The Black Horse, 29th August 2002 I’m chatting with Nick and Laura, Kinger is behind the bar and I can’t help but noticing the one or two evils I keep getting from the regulars. L, ‘What the Hell was that you two, pitiful! ’ N, ‘Think you just summed it up there…..’ L, ‘Anyway Col, who was that tart you where with last Saturday?’ C, ‘Oh, that was Eve, a reporter for the Echo.’ N, ‘Going undercover was she!!! ’ C, ‘Very funny, whats going on with that one of yours anyway?’ N, ‘Its alright, she’s thick as shÃt but has a lovely set.’ C, ‘Fair.’ L, ‘Enough of this crap, either of you shagged yours yet?’ C, ‘Behave you!!!!!! ’ Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Next up, a trip to currently bottom of the table Gravesend and Northfleet! I wonder if Eve fancies coming along…… Phonecall, 30th August 2002 C, ‘Hello…Eve?’ E, ‘Speaking, oh.. all right Col?’ C, ‘Yeah not bad, listen erm, I was wondering if you would like to come with the team to see the match tomorrow?’ E, ‘Hmmm, what time.’ C, ‘Its away to Gravesend so erm, about 2.30?’ E, ‘Yep, that should be ok, evening Kick off is it?’ C, ‘Certainly is.’ E, ‘Cool, I’ll be at the clubhouse about quarter past, oh yeah, you havn’t found a bra at your place have you..?’ C, ‘WHAT!?’ E, ‘Oh, I left my bra round yours after that evening we had.’ C, ‘I’ll have a look, erm…. Ok, cya tomorrow then.’ E, ‘Yep, cya. Bye, oh. And Col.. no drinking after the match this time….’ Sweet jesus………….. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raptor Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Like the scenario and the structure. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Thanks Raptor. For an experienced CMS man to say that I must be doing something right. The trip to the Gravesend game was quite short, I sat next to Eve and we talked pretty much non-stop. She was seemingly ecstatic to receive an executive pass for the game and was understanding when I had to leave her to prepare the players. Lovely girl she is, what she sees in me I have no idea! Nationwide Conference, 1st September 2002 Gravesend and Northfleet v Colden Common An electric start from the lads saw us apply constant pressure for the whole of the first half. Ghariban and Atterbury supplying the main of our attacking passes. This pressure paid off after 27 minutes when Atterbury picked up a deflected shot from Maamria and slotted it in. A free kick was awarded after 43 minutes when Higgins was brought down just outside the area by Skinner. Higgins lined up the kick, struck it magnificently and beat the bemused Gravesend keeper. HT 0-2 Our pressure continued in the second half as we went in search of a third, sadly this all ended when Sanger went off injured on 65 minutes. Due to our squad size this is a massive blow, the effect this may have cannot be underestimated. The game only had one more major moment after this, Cole deflecting a Gravesend shot easily over the bar. FT 0-2 Atterbury, 27 Higgins, 43 MOM, Atterbury. Again, this young man was superb. Att, 3299 My joy was enhanced afterwards by a quick look at the table. <pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre"> Pos Team Pld Won Drn Lst For Ag Won Drn Lst For Ag Pts -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1st Scarborough 5 2 1 0 9 5 2 0 0 4 1 13 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2nd Southport 5 2 0 0 7 1 2 0 1 5 3 12 3rd COMMON 5 1 0 1 2 2 3 0 0 9 2 12 4th Halifax 5 1 1 0 3 2 2 1 0 6 4 11 5th Woking 5 1 0 1 2 2 2 1 0 7 1 10 6th Margate 5 2 0 0 5 2 1 1 1 5 4 10 7th Hereford 5 2 1 0 7 4 0 2 0 4 4 9 8th Doncaster 5 1 2 0 7 3 1 0 1 2 1 8 9th Northwich Vics 5 1 1 1 4 3 1 1 0 3 1 8 10th Stevenage 5 1 1 0 2 1 1 1 1 5 5 8 11th Farnborough 5 1 1 0 2 1 1 1 1 7 8 8 12th Barnet 5 1 0 1 3 3 1 1 1 4 2 7 13th Morecambe 5 2 0 0 5 2 0 1 2 3 6 7 14th Kettering 5 2 0 1 5 4 0 0 2 1 4 6 15th Nuneaton Borough 5 0 2 1 2 4 1 0 1 4 5 5 16th Dag & Red 5 1 1 1 5 6 0 1 1 2 6 5 17th Yeovil 5 1 0 1 2 2 0 1 2 5 11 4 18th Burton Albion 5 1 0 2 7 8 0 0 2 3 6 3 19th Chester 5 1 0 2 6 7 0 0 2 2 5 3 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 20th Telford 5 0 1 2 2 9 0 1 1 1 3 2 21st Forest Green 5 0 1 1 5 7 0 0 3 1 8 1 22nd Gravesend 5 0 0 3 2 7 0 0 2 2 4 0</pre> At the moment we are certainly exceeding everyones expectations! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Rather then go down the Black Horse and join the players, Nick, James, Laura, Annie etc I decided to invited Eve back to my flat for a bit of home cooking……. The Pork chops I’d been keeping would go down just right about now! The meal was alright, I should have gone a bit lighter on the grill then maybe I did, but hey, I like something to get my teeth into. Afterwards me and Eve share some diet coke. C, ‘Be honest now, I can’t cook can I…..’ E, ‘Wouldn’t go that far, you just a got a bit over enthusiastic on the old grill that’s all! Easily done, believe me…’ C, ‘Eve, what are you doing here…’ E, ‘How do you mean.’ C, ‘I’m 18, hardly the prettiest and certainly not on a safe career path.’ E, ‘Do you think I’m that superficial?’ C, ‘Erm, well. I don’t know.’ E, ‘Look if you don’t like me I’ll just go.’ C, ‘No, Eve….’ E, ‘WHAT??’ C, ‘Look, Of course I like you, you’re a joy to be with and I’ll be fair, I think your bum is the sweetest thing ever.’ E, ‘I’m flattered…… ish! ’ C, ‘Come on, stay….’ E, ‘Alright, on the condition you stop wondering why things are happening…..’ I’ll leave the rest of the evening to your own imagination. Either way, amazing how things happen over the course of about ten days. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Non-League Paper, 2nd September 2002 <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Commoners an Early Season Revelation! (Report by Liam Fredericks…. Yes, him) Who would have thought at the beginning of the season that this could be possible. The tiny village of Colden Common, are third in the Conference and have beaten several far more established teams on the way. The only result we ‘experts’ could have predicted was the win over fellow promotion side Gravesend, but victories over Doncaster, Northwich and an emphatic victory over Telford have put the commoners in a fine position after five games. Indeed, after the 5-1 thrashing of Telford they lead the conference on Goal Difference. They find themselves just one point behind the only team who have beaten them so far this season, Scarborough. There are fears over their viability for a long term push for promotion, but who can tell with this remarkable little team. Maverick young boss Colin Brown certainly takes no prisoners on and off the pitch and while he may lack experience, he certainly has the drive to succeed. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 22, 2003 Share Posted March 22, 2003 The Black Horse, 3rd September 2002 Nick and I are discussing tactics while James is playing a game of Pool with Kinger. Ollie is behind the bar…. Oliver Moody – A Pub regular, mans the bar occasionally when there are no other options available to Kinger. Nice bloke, 21, Supports Blackburn Rovers. O, ‘Another Pint gents??’ C, ‘Yeah Cheers mate….’ N, ‘Cheers’ C, ‘Listen, I was thinking, We are doing well but….’ N, ‘What are you thinking Colin?’ C, ‘Ok, if we played 4-4-2 we would be dismantled. Our best position is central defence, on the wing we have quantity, but no real quality.’ N, ‘Er yeah, that’s why we are playing 4-1-3-2, what’s your point?’ C, ‘We are scoring goals, but still playing quite negatively. What if we pushed more up front.’ N, ‘Through the centre?’ C, ‘Yes, Maamria has proved himself to be our best striker. Stillwell and Sanger are excellent going forward. Atterbury can hold the centre of midfield with Kelly, and the defense can be left as.’ N, ‘We’re going 4-1-2-2-1??? Insane….’ C, ‘Let’s just try it in the Chester game.’ N, ‘But Chester are very strong, almost league quality!’ C, ‘If it works against them, it can work against anyone…..’ Nationwide Conference, 8th September 2002 Chester v Colden Common After trying the new formation against the Under 19’s I was confident of its potential. Chester seemed to be baffled with it to start with, And we scored after 14 minutes. Atterbury netting after an excellent forward run. We made no further head way in the half, but neither did Chester. HT 0-1 Chester seemed to have us figured out in the second half though. All their pressure was from the wings and Jimmy Kelly scored after 67 minutes. Our defense held strong thereafter though. Ghariban acting as almost an interceptor and challenging any winger that came his way. Any crosses that did come in where easily met by Curtis and Lahey. FT 1-1 MOM, Jimmy Kelly. The most sprightly player on the field. Highly promising. Att, 883 The potential for the formation is there. We just need to get used to it. The following Tuesday another test would come, at home, in the form of Kettering. Nationwide Conference, 11th September 2002 Colden Common v Kettering Ghariban again played a crucial role, blocking all wingers, and our defence remained solid through some early Kettering pressure. Gradually we then found our feet up front. Kelly making some excellent runs and indeed finding Sanger after 24 minutes in the penalty area, and making it 1-0. It was stalemate thereafter for ten minutes until a long ball from Stillwell found Maamria, who was all alone and infront of goal. 2-0. HT 2-0 Our dominance continued in the second half, but the only real attack gave our third goal, which from a corner. Maamria knocking in a header. FT 3-0 Sanger, 24 Maamria, 39, 81 MOM, Maamria, lethal finishing from our now lone striker. Att, 1865 Oh yes!!!! A quick look at the table after the game gave us more reason to cheer. Scarborough could only draw, we lead on goal difference. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 24, 2003 Share Posted March 24, 2003 I enter the clubhouse the following day and am about to go into the chairmans office to have a word with Kinger, before I knock on his door though I overhear him talking on the phone... K, 'Erm, look..... I never thought he would do this well......... Yes, yes, ok. I understand. But if we do somehow do there is no way we could................ You know as well as i do that this club can barely afford the wage bill let alone upgrading our.................. Look, I don't know............ The Lad is going to heartbroken if he hears about this.... ok cheers anyway, bye. I'll get back to you about the loan. Ok, bye.' Not being sure what to make of this, i never the less decide to knock anyway. #knocks# K, 'Come on.... oh, alright Col.' C, 'Alright Kinger, erm, listen i've heard you are concerned about the tactics i'm using.' K, 'Yeah, look erm, its going to be sussed eventually, you know that. Playing without wings could be leathal.' C, 'Please just trust me on this, you appointed me to manage the club, thats what i'm doing. If it implodes, its my problem.' K, 'It is the clubs problem though.... Success breeds money, we need the money to simply stay afloat.' C, 'Ok, but just think, if we get into the league...' K, 'Yes.........If.' Hmmmmmm.... Not the optimism you would expect from a conference chairman. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 Come Thursday, Laura had an idea, it didn’t take too long to implement and after a few phone calls it was sorted. We all went into Southampton for a night out. The party was as such. Me, Nick, Laura, Annie, James and Ollie. Laura and Nick where the designated drivers and at 9.30 we arrived at Leisure World, little would I know it at the time, but this was to be a night I would never forget. The night itself went well but it all went off on the way back to the car. A group of about seven lads turned on us after Nick accidentally bumped into one of them. They almost immediately set on him, Ollie, James and I tried our best to fend them off but by the time we had managed to get to Nick he was in a terrible state, Laura ran to her car. We got Nick into it and immediately rushed him to Southampton General. Ollie and James had to take a taxi to the hospital, as Laura’s tiny fiesta couldn’t fit us all in. Nick was immediately attended to by the medical staff but it was obvious he was in a bad way. Southampton General Hospital, 0.30am 14th September. Doctor, ‘What happened to him?’ Laura, ‘He was attacked, about seven blokes, they just laid into him….’ Me, ‘He was on the floor when they left him, they where just kicking the fúck out of him.’ D, ‘You really shouldn’t have moved him, he may have a broken neck………Nurse, I’m going to need a hand here.’ The Doctor and Nurse managed to get nick onto a bed and took him for treatment. C, ‘**** Lo.’ L, ‘Look….. he’ll be fine.’ (I could tell she wasn’t sure when she said that.) C, ‘I hope so, I really do.’ We stayed until about five in the morning, just sitting in reception in silence. We where given news at 4.30 by a consultant. James, ‘How is he?’ Consultant, ‘He’s been really lucky, no major damage to organs, his neck is intact. He has a few broken ribs and a fractured arm, but otherwise he is fine, just very sore.’ C, ‘Is he conscious?’ Con, ‘Yes, you can see him if you like.’ All, ‘Thankyou.’ As we entered his room he looked terrible. But was obviously pleased to see us. Nick, ‘What the fúck happened there?’ Ollie, ‘It was a group of lads, they just jumped you.’ Nick, ‘I can’t remember a thing.’ C, ‘Just take it easy mate… You are gunna be fine.’ N, ‘I know that, but I don’t feel it at the moment.’ He was released from hospital at 8 the next morning. Laura went and collected him. He was given leave from the club until he was better and James was appointed as Assistant manager for the time being. In with all the drama, there was still an away game to Nuneaton on the cards. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 Main road was in total shock over the build up to the Boro game. I just couldn’t stop thinking about it. Eve was very supportive throughout, but she could only help so much. Laura was quite inconsolable, blaming herself as it was her idea to go out that night. We went to Nuneaton on a definite low, the players heard what happened and where obviously dispirited. I aimed to turn their sadness into anger, anger to be aimed as a shot into their arms and to keep them playing well, but my tactic was seemingly terrible. Nationwide Conference, 15th September 2002 Nuneaton Borough v Colden Common It was a truly soulless performance from both sides, will I was getting acclaim for the clubs position, it was obvious that Nick’s contribution to the set up was essential. Nuneaton should have scored many times in the first half such was their dominance. Cole kept all chances out of the net, and kept us in the game. HT 0-0 Now Nuneaton seemed deflated as well, enough said, truly dire stuff. Please forgive me for not being too descriptive, but I simply didn’t care whether we lost or not. FT 0-0 MOM, Marc Cole. True heroics from our keeper. Att, 1056 I phoned Nick straight after the game. C, ‘Alright mate.’ N, ‘Alright, wtf happened? On our form we should have had this lot!!!’ C, ‘Well, the squad just didn’t perform, look…. My attention really was elsewhere.’ N, ‘For crying out loud, it’s not like I’m dead!’ C, ‘I know, but ****. I’ll never forget seeing you in the state you where.’ N, ‘I’m fine though….. Just a little battered up but fine! Right, you are not keeping me away from training and the matches, I’m coming back.’ C, ‘Sure you are up to it?’ N, ‘If I thought I wasn’t I wouldn’t want to come back would I!!’ Fair point…….. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 25, 2003 Share Posted March 25, 2003 Nick had an immediate rejuvenating effect on the team. He immediately got stuck in, despite being still very sore and managed to get the lads working. It was brilliant to see that he truly was ok. But still, how lucky he was. Casting my attention to our next game, I was very conscious of who our opponents would be. It was Margate. I had trouble convincing everyone in the club I actually wanted to beat them! My love for the small Kent outfit are such that the highlight of my 18th Birthday was not the brilliant Party held in the Black, not the presents, or even my friend Leanne singing somewhere over the rainbow on karaoke! But watching Margate beat Stalybridge Celtic 8-0!!!! It would certainly be strange playing them. Either way, bring it on! Nationwide Conference, 22nd September 2002 Colden Common v Margate Right from the off it was clear Margate where not underestimating us, totally defensive in outlook, they where relying on counter attack. We had all the early pressure and a spell of five minutes after a quarter of an hour gave two goals. An excellent Kelly strike and a Penalty converted by Lahey. Margate then changed tactics and went for the jugular! This caused Nick to stand up and shout as much as he could at our defence. It was good to have him back. HT 2-0 Margate’s new found positivity gave them a goal on 54 minutes, Thomas heading in from a corner, and they almost immediately afterwards hit the bar! Keister was genuinely unlucky. If I thought Nick was active in the first half, he found another level this. I simply left him too it and observed as he propelled our lads onwards. We where too much to contain and overwhelmed the ‘Gate for the rest of the second half. Maamria got our last goal on 72 minutes and that was it. We could have had more, but I was content. FT 3-1 Kelly 15 Lahey (pen) 20 Maamria 72 MOM, Nick Carr, What do you mean we can’t give it to our assistant? I just have! Att, 2576 (Blimey!) Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 26, 2003 Share Posted March 26, 2003 So, all is seemingly well now. We where still top of the conference, undoubtedly the surprise package of the season, Nick was mending, and driving the team on with his immense fighting spirit, The squad finally respect my management skills and I have a lovely bird (Eve, ‘OI YOU!’ ) sorry, woman in tow. Sorry missus. I was on the phone to my dad the day after the Margate game. My Dad, Geoff Brown. A massive influence and inspiration on my life. A full time project engineer with British bakeries, is unfortunately in Glasgow most of the time working on the refit of the factory there, If it wasn’t for him I would be a shadow of who I am now. Me, ‘Hello…. Dad?’ Dad, ‘Colin! Alright mate…. Can’t believe you beat Margate!’ C, ‘Well, its all professional now isn’t it.’ D, ‘Colden Common professional, er……….’ C, ‘We’re top of the conference here, every chance of pushing for the football league!’ D, ‘I really can’t believe it, Colden Common potentially versus Swansea! Leyton Orient!!!’ C, ‘Yeah, you found it tricky enough believing Margate could play Doncaster.’ D, ‘I think even Margate themselves could believe that!’ C, ‘Imagine the atmosphere here then.’ D, ‘Well, true…. Who have Common got next?’ C, ‘Next two games are tricky ones. Away to the Daggers, and at home to Burton.’ D, ‘Hmmmm, Cloughies lot will be a bit harsh. Dagenham though as well. See what you mean! What are you doing with the tactics by the way, According to the NLP you are making Liverpool look positively fat!’ C, ‘As long as it keeps working I’m happy.’ So, on to Victoria Road……. Nationwide Conference, 25th August 2002 Dagenham and Redbridge v Colden Common To say we started badly would be an understatement, The Dagenham defence where obviously on a mission and where clattering every Common player in sight, this unsettled us enough for Junior to stroll through our beleaguered defenders to net on 10 minutes. This prompted not just Nick, but me as well this time to start our customary ranting. It brought immediate results. Maamria scored on 18 minutes, after a stunning volley from 35 yards out and safety for the rest of the half. Dagenham’s attempts to dominate us had backfired badly, we truly had anger with us…… Sadly 30 minutes of solid pressure had only given us Maamria’s goal. HT 1-1 The second half was a damp squib in comparison to the later part of the first, but we where far more direct nonetheless. Stillwell netted with a clinical header on 59 and Maamria claiming his second on 90. Dagenham where well and truly beaten, they looked tired in the second half, and we just contained them without doing much. It was a result to be proud of that much was certain, just a shame that all entertainment went begging after the hour. (Like I care really!) FT 1-3 Maamria ,18, 90 Stillwell, 59 MOM, Maamria….. who else! Att, 972 Right, straight onto the next……. I’m feeling lucky!!!! Nationwide Conference, 29th August 2002 Colden Common v Burton Albion Burton where the antithesis of Dagenham, they seemed terrified of us. We had almost all possession in the first twenty minutes and we made it pay. Lee Kelly opened the scoring on 5 minutes with a lovely pass into the back of the net from just within the penalty area. Maamria then finished off a group of about 19 continuous passes to score……. On the 19th minute! Only then did Burton wake up and smell the coffee, Even managing to pass the ball without interception now and then, it was only intermittent though. HT 2-0 As with so many games this season, it all died in the second half. I don’t know how teams can change so much during fifteen minutes. Ok, lets put it like this……. Sunday league pub football. At Conference level. ‘Nuff Said! Terrible, no chances on goal, no major passing activity nowt. Oh well, three points. FT 2-0 Kelly, 5 Maamria, 19 MOM, Do I really need to tell you…… can you guess..? I’ll give you a clue. Maamria Att. 2711 Now then, the league table. <pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre"> Pos Team Pld Won Drn Lst For Ag Won Drn Lst For Ag Pts -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1st COMMON 12 5 0 1 12 3 4 2 0 13 4 29 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2nd Southport 12 5 1 0 14 5 4 0 2 10 9 28 3rd Farnborough 12 5 1 0 9 1 3 2 1 12 9 27 4th Doncaster 12 4 2 0 15 6 4 0 2 9 3 26 5th Barnet 13 3 2 1 12 8 4 2 1 17 5 25 6th Morecambe 12 5 0 1 14 5 2 1 3 9 10 22 7th Scarborough 12 3 3 0 12 5 3 1 2 11 10 22 8th Stevenage 12 4 2 0 11 5 2 2 2 11 9 22 9th Margate 12 3 2 1 14 9 3 1 2 9 8 21 10th Woking 12 3 0 3 9 8 3 1 2 11 6 19 11th Northwich Vics 12 4 1 1 9 5 1 3 2 6 7 19 12th Halifax 12 2 1 3 7 7 2 2 2 9 11 15 13th Yeovil 12 3 0 3 12 10 1 3 2 11 16 15 14th Dag & Red 13 2 3 2 13 15 1 3 2 9 12 15 15th Hereford 12 3 2 1 11 8 0 2 4 8 14 13 16th Kettering 12 3 1 2 9 10 0 1 5 4 13 11 17th Forest Green 12 2 1 3 11 13 1 0 5 3 15 10 18th Burton Albion 12 2 0 4 11 15 1 0 5 5 14 9 19th Chester 12 2 1 3 10 11 0 0 6 3 12 7 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 20th Gravesend 12 1 0 5 7 15 1 0 5 5 11 6 21st Nuneaton Borough 12 0 3 3 2 8 1 0 5 9 19 6 22nd Telford 12 1 1 4 5 15 0 1 5 3 12 5 </pre> Superb Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 2, 2003 Share Posted April 2, 2003 Sorry about the lack of recent updates, just got back from Uni for easter and have therefore lost my permanant net connection. Coming up though..... The FA Cup The Possible Promotion Push Financial woe. Stay tuned folks! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 4, 2003 Share Posted April 4, 2003 Non League Paper, 30th September 2002 <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Village Miracle! Colden Common now have a clear lead at the top of the conference, the big question on most peoples lips is how? They have a minimal budget. A squad of players who, no disrespect to them are from a lower level, and yet they seem to be playing together so well you would wonder how any of them had ever been neglected by clubs at a higher level! Much of their success could be in part due to audacious summer signing Noureddine Maamria, but as proved by young Manager Colin Brown, one player is not bigger then the club, even in a pond as small as Main Road. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> The Black Horse, 9pm 1st October 2002 I’m talking business with Nick and Kinger , while Eve and Laura attempt to play Darts. Kinger, ‘Right, you’ve been worried about the depth of squad lads, I know that.’ Nick, ‘Yeah, but we have no money, unless we can find some frees, even then though we have no scouting network…’ K, ‘I do have contacts. I’ve found a lot of youngsters we could make use of.’ C, ‘Lets see some names.’ K, ‘Here you go……..’ Kinger hands me a list. Its quite extensive. K, ‘I’ve highlighted the ones we should sign.’ N, ‘But we have never even seen them train.’ K, ‘Ok, lets put it this way, I’ve already signed them.’ C, ‘WHAT! Ermm, ok….’ N, ‘Thanks for letting us know!’ K, ‘Just trust me lads……. OI, Who did that!?….. Nick and I look round to see a dart placed right in-between the legs of Gianfranco Zola. It wasn’t actually Zola of course, but a poster representation of him. An FA Cup 2000 poster to be exact, poor old Kinger! And now a run down of the new talent….. Adam Campion, 19 An Attacking Midfielder, nothing too special but will be useful. Lloyd Beaton, 19 A central defender, gives us necessary depth in a position which we are severely lacking. Robert Southern, 18 A right side defender. Reserve material at best really. Ben Moore, 16 Left sided defender, his youth is a definite plus point, means he can only improve. Dale Cockrill, 18 Now we’re talking, A left sided defender and a gem of a player. Apparently we had to fend off attention from Shrewsbury, Notts County and Norwich to get him. Straight into the first team and I’ll have high hopes for him. Kevin Leighton, 18 Left sided or central defender. Tidy enough player. But won’t challenge the first team. Dean Shiels, 16 Northern Irish lad, has potential, but at the moment is nothing special. Striker Steve Rodgers, 19 Another Striker. Good player, but we already have too many in this position. Andy Preece, 34 This is an oddity. He was sacked as manager of Bury but Kinger snapped him up for his playing/coaching role, will be a first team player due to his skills, but he could be a candidate for club management if it all goes wrong for me. Threatened? I should be. Although he seems keen to impress. Christian Lee, 25 A loaner from Farnborough, good enough to make an impact in the first team. But only as a sub. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 4, 2003 Share Posted April 4, 2003 this is a quality story and I am really enjoying reading this, have never got round to posting a proper story myself but maybe one day I will. there is one very big problem in it though: "Adam Campion, 19 An Attacking Midfielder, nothing too special but will be useful." camps plays for the mighty Aylesbury United and really is something special, we signed him for free at the start of the season from REAding and he has been an Awesome(agressive) winger. so less of the nothing special seriously though keep it up, this story is great Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 4, 2003 Share Posted April 4, 2003 anohter mistake "Dale Cockrill, 18 Now we’re talking, A left sided defender and a gem of a player. Apparently we had to fend off attention from Shrewsbury, Notts County and Norwich to get him. Straight into the first team and I’ll have high hopes for him." he was on loan at Aylesbury last year unfortunately ans is ****, he is a lanky crap excuse for a footballer. you also have ex aylesbury loanee Andy Preece Aylesbury Rejects! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 7, 2003 Share Posted April 7, 2003 Sorry about the mistakes. I only have the data in the game to work with. Cockrill is actually quite good in this wierd alternate reality. strange. Sorry about the lack of updates again guys. It will only be spits and spots untill I get back to uni at the end of this month, but please, bear with me. I am determined to make this one a good 'un. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 15, 2003 Share Posted April 15, 2003 4th October, 2002 So, Top of the table, a far more strengthened squad. All is looking good. Me and Nick are discussing tactics again in the clubhouse. We’re killing time really, I’m waiting for a phonecall from Eve and Nick is waiting for James to finish working so they can go into Winchester and get tanked up….. Nick, ‘Any special plans for the Shaymen?’ Colin, ‘Not really….. Stick with what we’re doing, should be ok.’ N, ‘Its worrying me this, we WILL get found out.’ C, ‘Yes, but while it works its good.’ N, ‘Can’t believe Kinger got all those players behind our backs.’ C, ‘I’m grateful myself. Gives us far more depth, and that Cockrill is shaping up well.’ N, ‘It can’t help finances though, our gate receipts have been excellent, but it cannot last.’ C, ‘That’s not our area here….. Kinger knows what he’s doing….’ Phone Rings, Its Eve C, ‘Hello me sweetie.’ E, ‘Hello, listen, erm. I can’t make it to the Shay on Saturday, problem at work….. (Just let you guys know, she is a journalist… I’m pretty sure its been mentioned somewhere, but hey. Just in case…) C, ‘Oh, ok. No problem, will I see you in the evening?’ E, ‘Eve doubt it, I’ll probably just want to get some kip in. And you won’t be back til late anyhow.’ C, ‘Ok. See you soon. Missing you.’ E, ‘Bye.’ Oh well. Onto the game then. Nationwide Conference, 6th October 2003 Halifax Town v Colden Common The first half was incredibly frantic. Halifax certainly showing flair but lacking a certain cutting edge on the finish. Joe Lyons was particularly impressive for them. We withheld their pressure though, the lads being as resilient as ever, and before half time the predictable happened. Kelly slotted a beautiful through ball to Maamria, the outcome was already obvious. HT 0-1 The second half was similar to the first. But Halifax just could not finish. On the 59th minute disaster struck. Jason Stock overreacted to a challenge by Joe Lyons. His retaliation resulted in a second yellow card. We where down to ten men. Despite this, we continued our pressure. After the 80th minute though the tide turned, it was all Halifax, but we held out. FT 0-1 Maamria, 45 MOM, Maamria. How many is it now!? So, we had retained our top spot but the focus is now shifting. Next week was FA Cup final qualifying round weekend. Success would bring Money, something we badly need. The opposition would be Scarborough. At the McCain Stadium. Easy it wouldn’t be. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 15, 2003 Share Posted April 15, 2003 10th October 2002 Kinger calls me into the office in the clubhouse. Kinger, ‘Alright Col. Sit down mate.’ Colin, ‘Ok, cheers.’ K, ‘Right, I’m sure you are aware that the club isn’t that well off money wise.’ C, ‘Yeah.’ K, ‘Right, well. I don’t want to put too much pressure on you. But we need a good cup run…. Badly. If we get to the third round and get a big team it could secure the clubs long term future.’ C, ‘Ok, tell me. How bad is it….’ K, ‘Ok Col, I’ll be fair with you. If we win the league, We can’t afford to upgrade the stadium. We would have to ground share, and then maybe sell Main Road to survive. And of course, the only Stadia around here we could do that with are St Mary’s, Fratton Park or West Leigh down in Havant.’ C, ‘I understand Kinger, I can’t promise, but I will do everything in my power to try.’ K, ‘Cheers lad, I know you will.’ Ground Sharing at St Mary’s!? He can’t be serious, either way. The point was taken, our future in the village must be secured. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 29, 2003 Share Posted April 29, 2003 I couldn’t let the players know the full extent of the importance of a cup run, the pressure would be too much on them. Surely the passion most people associated with football would be enough, surely. Well. It’s a long way up to Scarborough, and it would be a crying shame to go away from it with nothing. FA Cup Final Qualifying Round, 13th October 2002 Scarborough v Colden Common This vital game didn’t start well…. Scarborough obviously had an inkling into our narrow tactics, and crosses where coming in left, right and predictably, centre. We held them off though and came back into it, our first shot on target coming from Maamria on 24. Just before half time, it happened. It was one nil to Scarborough, Fatokun scored a screamer from 35 yeards. All credit to the man, but the fact remained we where one nil down in a vital game. HT 1-0 My team talk was quite muted, the players could sense there was more to this game then meets the eyes. It worked either way! We where majestic at the start of the second half, Atterbury, Kelly and Sanger ruled midfield, the reward came in the 62nd. Christian Lee. Christian Lee? Unfortunately Maamria had to go off injured on 62 minutes. He scored within seconds of coming on, it was remarkable, the scarborough keeper just passed it straight to him. Maamria’s loss seemed to hit the squad, the game seemed to die afterwards. This would go to a replay. FT 1-1 Fatokun, 45 Lee, 62 MOM, Oliver Brassart. Solid play from the Scarborough man. Att. 2161 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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