Sliding Doors (on the District Line): Hornchurch's Gwyneth Paltrow

The multiverse theory states and I quote (from Wiki so take it with a pinch of salt):

The multiverse (or meta-universe) is the hypothetical set of infinite or finite possible universes (including the historical universe we consistently experience) that together comprise everything that exists and can exist: the entirety of space, time, matter, and energy as well as the physical laws and constants that describe them. The various universes within the multiverse are sometimes called parallel universes.

Since the beginning of time people have often toyed with the idea of Parallel Universes and some of our greatest minds have turned their imaginations to what they might be like. Star Trek taught us that there is a universe where all evil people are clearly demarcated by facial hair; Family Guy posited that there would be a universe where Meg would be hot (madness); Futurama suggested that all universes exist within a cardboard box; Dr Who used it as a lazy way to reintroduce some 'better' designed Cybermen and as a total cop out at the end of 'Journey's End'; and of course Sliding Doors took the idea to the banal heights of romantic comedy. Indeed FM itself is an exercise in parallel universes. Thousands of different what ifs... but what if... what if we could see how one manager's tiny decision affected not just his day but his whole managerial career?

Meet Richard Kinsella. A sunday-league footballer with everything to prove and nothing to lose. He would have been satisfied with his low-level playing career if it wasn't for a cruel moment on the playing fields of Dagenham where in the first few moments of a cup final he had his leg broken. After being told he would never play again he had a choice: give up the game he loved forever and go back to working at Percy Ingle on Dagenham Heathway or do a coaching course with a view of going into management. He chose the latter option and by the summer of 2014 he was fully qualified and ready to take his first foray into management. As a new manager and a proud local lad Richard had very stringent ideas on how a club should be run especially in this day and age of high finance. Clubs should stick to locally based talent build from the ground up. No signings, be a true part of the community.

This is where our story diverges and we have our 'Sliding Doors' moment.

Perusing the local job list Richard noticed that a local non-league club AFC Hornchurch were advertising for a new manager after getting promoted into the Conference South after local legend Jimmy McFarlane decided to hang up his sheepskin gilet. He duly applied and was invited to an interview...

On the day of the interview Richard was ready to hop on the District Line train for the short journey to Upminster Bridge station when he realised he was thirsty. District Line trains were usually pretty regular so even though he was only just running on time he could easily get a drink of water and be on time... however this was the day of the biggest interview of his life. Could he risk it?

Of course he couldn't. He would stay on the platform, get the train and just grab a bottle of water when he got to Upminster Bridge.

He took the train and got to the interview in good time. As soon as he sat down with chairman Colin McBride and the rest of the board members everyone knew that something special was in the air. Richard expounded his theories and desires (and an AVB style Powerpoint presentation) and wowed the panel. The interview lasted over an hour and a half and at the end of it the decision was unanimous. On the 25th June 2014 Richard Kinsella was formally offered the job to be the new manager of AFC Hornchurch. His brief was a simple one: build the club up in his image using only the players that were local to the area or came through the youth academy. Prove to the world of football that a club could still be the heartbeat of the community and take the club and himself to new heights. He gladly accepted...

Of course he could, plus he was really thirsty. He left the platform and jogged upstairs to the small shop outside the station and once he had purchased his water jogged back down to the platform just as the train he could have caught shut its doors and left the station.

He glanced up at the board. The next train to Upminster was 3 minutes away; still plenty of time. Except after 3 minutes the board still showed that it was 3 minutes away. Richard started to shift uncomfortably on the platform. If the train was going to be any longer he was in danger of being late, also he came to the uncomfortable realisation that he needed the loo from drinking his water. Eventually the 'next train' board decided to show no time at all and then the dreaded announcement

"Due to a pinecone on the line at Upney trains on the District Line are severely delayed and services to Upminster are suspended."

Richard bellowed in anger and hared up the stairs. He needed a cab. Quickly. 30 minutes and £25 quid later he arrived. Late. The Chairman's secretary eyed him disdainfully at she told him he would now be seen at the end of the day and no he couldn't use the toilet because it was being fixed.

Richard waited a full hour feeling his bladder getting heavier and heavier before he was called into the room. After a perfunctory handshake with the Chairman he sat himself down on the seat and crossed his legs as tight as he could. He apologised for being late and was just about to start talking when the Chairman raised his hand and started to talk about the job and what he wanted for the club. As he sat there listening to him talk Richard could only concentrate on trying not to pee himself. Eventually he was asked a question and hadn't heard it. He asked for it be repeated but the Chairman just sighed, shook his head and thanked him for coming.

Richard dejectedly headed home (after calling into a pub to relieve himself) gutted and jobless.

Okay so... apologies for the story like introduction, but now that is out of the way it is time to breakdown the conceit for this Career Thread. Basically this is going to be two games in one as I tend to get bored playing in one way, but have always tried and wanted to have a proper career thread so I've come up with this idea that will hopefully allow me to have the best of both worlds.

So, in Reality A we have the world where Richard Kinsella has the Hornchurch job. This game is going to be a Give Youth a Chance challenge mixed with a bit of localism. In the first instance Richard will only play his youth players but if there is a huge hole in the squad that needs filling he will only be allowed to sign players from the immediate local area (Romford, Dagenham, Upminster,). This will be a one club career that will see him try to take Hornchurch to the Premier League and beyond...

In Reality B we have the world where Richard Kinsella hasn't got the Hornchurch job. Instead, jobless and soon to be homeless he is forced out of English footballing culture becoming disillusioned with the ideas of heady ideas of becoming a footballing heart to a local community. In this reality Richard renounces all those previous ideas and realises that you have to try and get as much out of football as you can and go wherever and whenever the opportunities arise. The world just doesn't work the way he thought it did and he will do anything and go anywhere to try and get to the top...

I have loaded the following leagues down to with a Large database (plus all English Level 7 data).

England - Skrill N/S

France - National

Germany - Div 2

Spain - Segunda

Italy - Serie B

Finland - First Division

Portugal - National Championship

Also have Mexico, Brazil and Uruguay on view only with a view to activating them as Richard grows into his Reality B management career.

The realities diverge on 25th June 2014 with Reality A Richard taking charge of AFC Hornchurch while Reality B Richard just goes unemployed. The idea is to do a season in each reality and post the updates comparing how their lives and earnings and styles differ.

Part experiment, part madness. I hope you'll join me...

Reality A:

Newly unveiled AFC Hornchurch manager Richard Kinsella poses proudly on the District Line for a tasteful black and white photo for his first managerial profile by the Non-League paper. 26 years old and ready prove that AFC Hornchurch can be, to quote that jumped up Barcelona phrase, more than a club. The first thing he will have to do is review the squad Jimmy McFarlane has left him and decide which young players he will start nurturing straight away:

Reality B

Absolutely gutted about not getting the job Richard goes out and gets drunk. He is snapped with a tasteful looking ginger moustache and it soon becomes the first picture found when he is Google image searched. The jobcentre are not amused...

Both Richard A and B are English Charlton fans, with a Sunday League Rep and born in Dagenham.

From here on out there lives are going to be very different...

Already a better story than that god awful film.

Champions

Brazil - Corinthians

Premier League - Chelsea

Finland - RoPS

League 1 - Monaco

Bundesliga - Bayern Munich

Serie A - Juventus

Mexican First Division - Tigres, Santos Laguna

Premeira Liga - Benfica

La Liga - Barcelona

Uruguay - Nacional

Europe

Europa League - Valencia

Champions League - Real Madrid

English Breakdown

FA Cup - Man City

League Cup - Chelsea

JP Trophy - Bristol City

FA Trophy - Gateshead

looking forward to reading about this one

Thanks Lenzar. At least I have managed to do that and I hope it is worth reading Cheesey

Already the universes are showing signs of diverging with the World Cup finals starting just before the split and then continuing after.

Reality A: AFC Hornchurch

Winners: Germany 2-0 Runners Up: Brazil

3rd Place Play Off: Holland 1-4 Spain

England watch: finished 2nd with 7pts in their group to Spain on GD. Knocked out in the 2nd round by Germany 1-0.

Reality B: Unemployed

Winners: Spain 2-1aet Runners Up: Argentina

3rd Place Play Off: Algeria 0-3 Uruguay

England watch: Finished 2nd with 7pts in their group to Spain on GD. Knocked out in the 2nd round by Belgium 1-0

So rest assured that it takes more than a missed train to take England to do anything other than lose in the 2nd round of the World Cup.

Does Bosch take penalties? He'll drill them in.

Does Bosch take penalties? He'll drill them in.

He's 11th on the Penalty Taking List at the moment...

A tough opening assignment for Kinsella's Hornchurch project and management bow with 3 away games in the first month and a start at 4th favourites Woking, but an opening assignment that was fairly well negotiated.

A fairly comfortable 0-0 at Woking was followed up with a thumping 5-0 victory over Staines back in Hornchurch with young back up Adeoye Yusuff getting a start because Payne was knackered with the three day turn around and repaying the faith with a brace. Rickie Hayles also got two and followed it up with the winner away to Bromley. Finally the month ended with Kinsella's first defeat away to Bishop's Stortford although it was a harsh defeat having gone nearly 80 minutes before conceeding. Still a good start for the managerial rookie. Closer to the top than the bottom although whether that will continue will remain to be seen...

Up Next...

September starts with two home games against Eastleigh and Basingstoke before a trip to Bath. There is also a trip to Maidenhead before the team end the month at home to Sutton as the games flow thick and fast at the beginning of the season. There is also the FA cup 2QR so the squad depth will be tested and already injuries have taken out a key player with captain Dave Rainford out for two months with a strained knee. Still the defense has been very pleasing and despite Stefan Payne's lack of goals at the beginning of the season the side looks to have a decent balance to it at the moment.

So in Reality A Martin Tuohy has just returned from Brentwood on loan (and not a moment too soon given that both Payne and Yussuf are out for a good while). There has been one match since his return (which he was injured for) but he has now decided to complain about a lack of first team football...

A tale of two very different months. September saw despair: raw and unyielding. Winter was definitely coming with 4 thumping defeats with not many positives to take from them (although the defeat to Basingstoke was perhaps not warranted). The larruping away at Truro in the cup was a real low and come the last days of September things were looking pretty grim. Four important players were injured with both key strikers Payne and Yussuf suffering from knee ligament damage while Dave Rainford, captain and midfield dynamo, was still out as well. It got so bad that Braithwaite got his debut and, although he scored on debut, at 16 he was nowhere ready to lead the line. However cometh the hour cometh the Atu. Signed only because Kinsella signs local boys he inspired the team to their only win of the month away to Maidenhead (which also saw other youth prospect Barraclough get his first goal for the club) before leading Hornchurch into a Green October with a brace against Welling.

Hornchurch's status as one of the most rubbish sides in the Skrill South was confirmed after their defeat of Welling when the Wings sacked their manager yet while Gerry Taggart was crying into his early morning chai latte Kinsella's boys were going from strength to strength. They followed up their Welling win with a 'had the better of it' draw against Boreham Wood before suffering a likely defeat against Eastbourne (although they were never out of it until the last five). That defeat wasn't going to derail them though and the team recorded a resilient win away to Dartford at the end of the month. This meant that the horrors of early September were now a distant, yet extremely tangible memory. For now though, things were good...

7 points clear of the relegation zone is an excellent return at this stage of the season especilly given the injury crisis that had engulfed the club in September. Still, the team's tendency to embark on runs of bad form will not have escaped the manager nor will the injury proneness of certain key players in the side. It's going to be a long road ahead, but the resilience of Hornchurch in the face of almost total collapse will please Kinsella and give him hope in the months ahead. Coming up the team starts November with a trip to bottom placed St Albans (lump on a Saints win now) before away trips to Chelmsford and then Weymouth in the FA trophy. The team has a run of three home games in 6 days between the 20th of December and Boxing Day and those fixtures could have a big influence on survival. Also the return of Payne and Yussuf can only have a positive effect on the side. You'd hope...

Up and down, up and down; Kinsella's Hornchurch are very up and down. November started with a professional win against the bottom side at home before the team turned from Jekyll into Hyde with a 4-1 thumping by Chelmsford before a disgusting 1-0 defeat in the Fa Trophy away to Weymouth. That's two sides from the league below that have knocked out Hornchurch in the first rounds of the cup this year. After tearing his team a new one after the Weymouth match Kinsella oversaw a 3 match unbeaten run with the highlight being an excellent come from behind win at play-off chasing Whitehawk. However, as is the way with his Hornchurch side the team embarked on a run of 4 straight home games leading up to Christmas with an unforgivable defeat to relegation threatened Tonbridge. The were able to get back to winning ways against Dorchester before the visit of the top two over Christmas week. A second 0-0 draw against Woking was off set by the defeat against Havant but overall Kinsella can enter 2015 feeling vaguely optimistic about Hornchurch's future in this league as his team possess an 8 point advantage over Welling at this stage.

As far as the squad is concerned the injuries have subsided although Martin Tuohy (after being given a run in the first team where he was *****) threw his toys out of the pram again about lack of first team football. He'll be off, maybe even in January.

8 points clear of the relegation zone means that these two months have added an extra point to the cushion and if the team can keep that up over the next four months then survival should be assured. January means transfer window but with the club already over its wage budget I don't see many incoming players joining the side. Martin Tuohy might leave which could facilitate some action, otherwise this squad will take it all the way to the finish line. Fixturewise January is a big month with 6 games that could decide whether Hornchurch drop into a relegation battle or stay in the safety of midtable with matches against the teams in and around mid-table with them. The lack of goals could really do for this side with none of the strikers really staking a claim to be undroppable. Also the squad depth will really be tested especially if another injury crisis hits. Safe. For now...

A bad looking month which wasn't actually that bad despite the inability to win at home. Hornchurch make their name as Away specialists but with some tough games this month it was always going to be a difficult one. The reason the team is in trouble is because they can't seem to take on and dominate a game at Home when expected. When sitting back and hitting on the break the team is decent but when they are expected to be a bit more proactive the team wilts under the pressure. Can the team turn it around at home? That'll be the key to survival you feel...

As for January Transfers Tuohy finally made his way as Gosport decided to buy not one but two of Hornchurch's players. Tuohy was always going to go, but the loss of Love was a calculated gamble. With Andre Gumbs hating his guts but showing promise Kinsella decided to gamble and get rid of the more loyal Love to give Gumbs his chance. Whether he can turn Gumbs may well play a key part in the run-in especially if there are any injuries in defence. As for players in Freddie Warren born in Barking was brought in to give some impetus into midfield as that is the oldest and most unfit part of the squad.

Up Next...

Fixtures against teams in and around them which will have a huge impact on the rest of the season. With the 8 point cushion being cut to 4 the team is well in the relegation fight, but anyone up to even Woking will be feeling slightly apprehensive about the prospect of relegation. Hornchurch will need to turn around the home form, but with away games against all the bottom three to come it might not matter...

And no sooner do I write this but the team win 1-0 away at Sutton. Can all the games be away for the season?

Who are P-Iirot?

A side promoted into the Finnish First Division. You'll get a full breakdown when the Reality B season starts later.

This period of results felt a lot worse than it actually turned out to be. On reflection just two defeats in nine looks a pretty good record but on March the 20th with the team on a 6 game run without a victory and seemingly unable to score a goal it all looked very grim especially as most of the teams were lower mid-table and beneath, but a win and a draw against sides in the top half soon made Kinsella feel a lot more optimistic about the chances of survival. Optimistic enough to be offered a one year extension and optimistic enough to accept.

The team lacks goals and this will be the key consideration going forward into next season assuming the last five games do not see an incredible collapse. However the team spirit and defense seem to be well suited to this level and Kinsella's first season can definitely be considered to be more of a success than failure.

March saw the new youth intake and with slim pickings from last year all 16 players were signed up to the youth squad by Kinsella.

Three players look like they will definitely get a go next season.

David Abbot: is a very promising young left back. With Billy Coyne on his way out and YP0.1 Bernard Bassey being trained for a left winger role he could easily fill the 2nd choice left back role next season.

Steve Bennett: will tick the box as a good third choice. Will probably get a run out in the cups as Kinsella looks to develop him, but doesn't need to be first choice if there is an injury to Echepere so a good option to have.

Glenn Smith: His ability to play all over the back line and in DM will mean he could see himself on the bench very early on next season. With promising young centre-backs in the squad he may well find himself turning into a fully fledged DM as his career develops.

Up Next...

It may have felt like a bad set of results but with the 4 point gap doubling in size to 8 again it has actually been a pretty fantastic February and March. With only 5 games left Kinsella will be looking for his side to ease their way over the finish line but with matches against Tonbridge, Weston and Dorchester still on the list (both Tonbridge and Weston away) it could prove to be a squeaky April. The match away to Whitehawk first up could very well decide whether it will be an experimental run to the end of the season or a fight to the death.

It looked pretty bad for Kinsella's side when both Whitehawk and then Tonbridge turned them over. With the gap cut to just 4 points and Dorchester one of those teams just 4 points back it was going to be a massive game and the fears of being dragged right into it right at the last moment looked like they were going to be realised. Cue the best performance of the season, especially after the team went 1-0 down early on, with the highlight being Stefan Payne going clean through but unselfishly setting up YP1.13 Michael Forbes for a debut goal. Suddenly, from looking in real danger of relegation the team were safe with two games to go and what was even more amazing is that rewarded their long suffering fans with a 1-0 win in the last home game of the season. The season ended with a 2-1 defeat to Hayes and Yeading which sealed them the title, but it didn't matter. Kinsella's first season at Hornchurch was over and the team were still in the Skrill South.

Finishing 18th especially when anywhere up to 13th was a possibility with a game to go was slightly disappointing but the team finished 10 points clear of relegation so Kinsella's complaints will be kept to a minimum. His first season in charge of a team he plans to mould completely on local talent has been a success.

Michael Forbes YP1.13: was not mentioned in dispatches in the previous update but great performances for the Under 18s coupled with decent potential meant that he got a run in the biggest game of the season and scored a goal. With Albert Jarret proving to blow very hot and cold and Chirs Bourne on his way out there is definitely a chance for him to make that AML position his own and a few more days like Dorchester will certainly help.

Richard Kinsella's first season in charge of Hornchurch ended well with the team surviving fairly comfortably in 18th position, 10 points clear of the eventual relegation candidates. The cups were nothing to write home about as the team went out in the first round of each to lower league opposition .

The squad was just about good enough to survive in the league but the lack of goals was the main problem with the team 20th for Goals Scored. The fact that they had the 12th best defence in the league was the reason for that survival and it will be on this defence that Kinsella will have to build over the next few years with the majority of them in their early twentiesand some of the best youth prospects defenders. If a signing is to be made in the Summer it will have to be another striker especially as Stefan Payne refuses to sit down and talk contracts...

With the team suffering financially it looks like Stefan Payne will not sign a new contract and the wage budget has been initiailly cut. Luckily Kinsella was able to sign everybody else up to contract extensions that he wanted. Andre Gumbs' about-turn (he's now talking to Kinsella again and has rescinded his transfer request) after being treated with kid-gloves for a couple of months has meant that the very inconsistent Ricky Hayles will be dispensed with. Both Richard Langley and Anthony Riviere will be off at the end of the season due to not playing too many games and wanting a lot of money along with being 35 and 36 respectively. The emergence of a couple of left-sided youth options means that Chirs Bourne who is on a non-contract will go and Billy Coyne was sacked in April due to missing training and generally being a bit of a dick. Albert Jarrett is going to be let go too. This may represent a bit of a risk, but with an average rating of just 6.57 and at the age of 30 you have to feel it's a risk worth taking. The other risk is the possibility of letting reserve goalkeeper Paul Walker to go but with two youth team prospects in goal he may have to leave to free up funds. The fear though is that Payne will go and leave a huge hole up front for Kinsella to fill.

A reputation as a cautious and defensive manager has been developed, but with the resources he has at his disposal that is hardly very surprising.

Season     Team              League                     Finish    Cups                             
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2014-15      AFC Hornchurch         Skrill South        18th      FA Cup (2nd QR), FA Trophy (3rd QR)

A pre-season of upheaval and more departures than Richard probably thought necessary have left his Hornchurch side looking slightly threadbare in places, but with financial issues to consider and some players not re-signing it was not all his own choice.

Langley and Riviere didn't get too many games last season and with central midfield being one of the stronger areas of the team he was happy to let them go. Ashley Walker was a reserve RB who got about 2 games last season while the emergence of two goalkeepers in the youth team meant that getting Paul Walker off the books was a good move too. Albert Jarrett was a bit more of a calculated gamble and we'll get a taste of what we could have won as he has gone off to Farnborough who have moved into the Conference South this season. Ricky Hayles hit and miss style meant he was happy to give him away to Concord.

The two big departures were Stefan Payne, last season's top scorer and spearhead, and Alex Bentley. Replacing Payne has been and will probably continue to be the biggest issue facing Kinsella. Two signings from 'London' in Kezie Ibe and Jason Hallett have been made but neither of them are as good as Atu so will be back up. There are no other decent local players. Payne himself has moved to Skrill Premier side Nuneaton so it will be interesting to see how he gets on. As for Alex Bentley, TNS came in and offered £5,000 for him, and with local London lad Dean Smith with a solid 3 stars and enough youth players to have a couple of back-ups the money was more than enough to accept.

So a side with arguably less quality than last year's one that finished 10 points above the relegation zone embarked on a series of pre-season fixtures and instantly the lack of striking options and quality became apparent. 4/6 games saw no goals and once again the team were unable to beat Brentwood. One plus was the emergence of Andre Brathwaite YP0.3 as a goal-scoring winger option on the right. If he can keep scoring goals on the right and through the centre the lack of striking options could see him get an extended run in the side.

Weirdly the press seem to think that the team is overstocked up front (which is a laugh) and lacking on LW where as LW is the one place the team actually has decent youth options.

Media Prediction: 14th

Title Odds: 33-1 (14th favourites. Eastleigh/Whitehawk joint 6-1 favourites)

Skirll South Expectations: Safe mid-table position

FA Cup Expectations: Fourth Qualifying Round

FA Trophy Expectations: First Round

Transfer Budget: Nowt

Wage Budget: £4610 (£821 down on last season) (spending £4637)

Season Ticket Sales: 60 (+4)

The team is still set up in the 4-5-1/4-3-3 varient. The aim is to play a possession based game and keep men behind the ball away from home and be a bit more expressive at home. Last year's home form was terrible so a better tactic to be played at home might be one of Kinsella's first priorities. Bernard Bassey YP0.1 gets an early chance at LW to stake a claim while Henry Atu will start the season up front. Adeoye Yussuf was Kinsella's original 1st choice but a barren pre-season has seen him dropped to the bench.

Inigo Echepare: A key fixture in last season's mission to stay in the league and he will have to be at his best again to ensure AFC Hornchurch retain their Skrill South status and push on up the table.

Jordi Gough: At 25 the LB should be a key member of the backline. It's a big season for Gough who was decent last year and lead the team for much of it, but with at least two younger players breathing down his neck he will have to step up his performances to remain a first team fixture.

Sam Lechmere: Topped the assists chart last year with 12 as well as scoring 7 goals. With Stefan Payne gone Kinsella will be counting on Lechmere to keep up his scoring and creating form to ensure the team stay in the division.

Henry Atu: Scored 4 goals last year from 21 appearances (4 starts/17 sub) and at 25 is now expected to lead the line. A lot could depend on him hitting the ground running and dealing with the pressure of replacing Payne.

The season starts at home to Bath before trips to Sutton, Staines and then newly promoted Kingstonian at the end of the month. 3 away games in the first 4 might phase some managers but if last season is anything to go by it may well prove to be points on the board.