Stoke 8-4 Chelsea

[Simon the snail]

I'm currently in the year 2015 and am in the prem with Stoke city. We came up against a difficult Chelsea side knowing that if we wanted European competition next season we would have to get some sort of result from this.

Little did I expect this:

a surprise victory!

If anyone is intersted I shall continue with this story, updating it from 2005-2006 to this victory and beyond.

[Simon the snail]

I'm currently in the year 2015 and am in the prem with Stoke city. We came up against a difficult Chelsea side knowing that if we wanted European competition next season we would have to get some sort of result from this.

Little did I expect this:

a surprise victory!

If anyone is intersted I shall continue with this story, updating it from 2005-2006 to this victory and beyond.

[BobBev]

Please do Simon.

[Simon the snail]

Season Summary - 05/06

The season began with a shock appointment at League one side Bristol city. The Chairman Steve Lansdown stating 'he is the best man for the job and I am confident he will lead this club in the right direction' Public opinion was that this was a cost cutting measure. The fans were not best pleased...

However the early signing of left wing veteran Francisco Javier de Pedro on a free transfer and a 3-1 friendly victory over Parma gave light to some optimism within the fanbase, causing a number of fans to call in to local phone ins stating the reasons why this will be their year. However this happens every year, and seeing the club has been stuck in league one for what seems an eternity, most neutrals doubt these 'positive reasons'.

And they were right. With defeat in the FA cup 1st round and league cup 3rd round and a very average performance in the league, the only reason the manager kept his job was due to a good run and eventual victory in the LDV vans trophy.

Fans were ever optimistic at the end of the season though, as 2 January signings - namely DR of Congo international pair Mazuwa N'Sumbu and Jean Paul Kielo Lezi (DM and SC) and the loan signing of young Man U centre back Pique lifted the clubs second half performances - providing that essential pace up front and solid defence that all good clubs needed.

Steve Lansdown had this to say in his end of season report:

'...finances are in better shape than ever, this a new era within the football club as we rebuild for next year. Although the manager hasn't had the greatest of starts this year we are very happy with the recent success in the LDV vans trophy and have full confidence in his continual success next year'

Needless to say the Bristol city manager is one of the favourites for an early season sacking next year.

[Simon the snail]

I best just say here that any references to real life people in this story is entirely fictional and is only correct in the context of this story.

05-06 league position

pos 12 W18 D12 L16 F59 A49 pts66

06/07 season summary

Excitement amongst fans grows to a fever pitch when in a pre season press conference the Bristol city manager has this to say:

'I feel that the main reason for our failure in the league last year was the lack of goals we scored. I intend to bring in a few new signings this year and this shall begin with the bosman transfer of Neil Mellor to Ashton Gate from Liverpool'

Mellor had this to say about the matter: 'this is a great club and I am honoured to be here. I think we've got a great chance and with a manger of this experience leading us we can't go wrong' Right...which manager would that be Neil?

He was quickly followed through the rusted iron Ashton gates by Hungarian striker Robert Feczesin, a returning Pique (on loan) and promising goalkeeper Martin Fulop - on loan from Tottenham.

Come the first game of the season, bristol citys odds had risen from expected mid table obscurity to having a definite chance for the playoffs.

After the first game, a 7-0 thrashing of Brentford, a top 6 finish was almost guaranteed...according to the bookies.

In the cups bristol city performed much better this year, losing 2-1 to Premiership side Middlesborough in the league cup 3rd round and 2-0 to Man U (without Pique to due a clause in the loan contract) in the FA cup 4th round.

City were well clear at the top of the table and in the final of the LDV vans trophy - which they lost 3-2 to Tranmere where the City players lost their heads in the second half and threw away a 2-0 lead. The press boys were predicting a turn for the worse for the rest of the season. To everyones surprise (even the City fans') the team continued with their good form and at the end of the season every one was singing their praises...except the keeper of the Football league records:

'we have had to expend a vast amount of our budget on neww scriptures for the coca cola league one. all because some manager of Bristol city thinks he can break the points record, goals record, biggest win record, most games won in a row, most games without losing, top goalscorer, most assists, most man of the match and highest average rating record? and I suppose he expects us to enter him in the manager of the season books as well? Pah!'

the number of games won in a row was in fact 11 which were actually part of their 32 games unbeaten record.

Here is what Steve Lansdown had to say in his end of season report:

'...finances are in better shape than ever, this a new era within the football club as we rebuild for next year. The manager had the greatest of starts this year and we are very happy with the recent success in the league and have full confidence in his continual success next year' claims that his report was nothing but a cut and paste of the previous years one were quashed by lansdowne's security . The man himself was on a cruise somewhere in the mediterranean so wasn't available for comment.

pos 1 W36 D7 L3 F108 A29 GD +79 pts 115

Neil Mellor 47 games 39 goals 23 assists 22 MoM 7.90 average rating

[Simon the snail]

Season Summary 07/08

Being in unknown teritory has left the BC fans strangely (and ominously) silent this pre season. No one could quite believe the dominance displayed by Neil Mellor and the rest of the team in league one last year and despite being one of the favourites for relegation the fans seem to be quietly confident.

Indeed a newly appointed member of the BC board had this to say about the upcoming season:

'we are very proud with the position this football club is in and will strive to improve it even further. The manager has been provided with generous funds for players and wages and we remain confident he can continue to guide this club forwards and upwards'

The manager shows off the vast amounts of cash at his disposal by signing 7 players in the pre season, all for a cumulative £0...

The fans see the return of confident keeper Fulop - this time not as a loanee. Atletico Madrid pair Marcelo Sosa (DMC) and Kiki Musampa (AML) will push lopez and N'sumbu onto the bench at Ashton Gate. The defence is also strengthened with the captures of right back lionel Scaloni, and centre backs Pieter Collen from Feyenoord and Titus Bramble.

The season starts off well with sell out crowds and 3-1, 4-2 and 4-1 victories over Ipswich, Preston and rivals Swindon.

In the cups, Bristol city come up against strong premiership opposition in the early rounds - losing 3-1 to Leeds in the 2nd round of the league cup and crashing out of the FA cup to a far stronger tottenham side 4-1 in the 3rd round.

At the halfway point in the season the robins are in the lofty position of 2nd place so the manager decides to stengthen his teams hold on the automatic promotion spot and spends 650k on James Beattie from everton and 450k for 6 foot 4 DMLC Tim Sparv from Southampton. When unveiling the players in a press conference, the manager had this to say, 'These guys will provide the strength in depth this isde needs to push for honours this season. We can now cope with any injury crisis...and any threat in the air.'

However, a bad run of results in the final games of the season leaves the City on 85 points, 2 out of the automatic promotion spots. the dreaded play offs await!

First up Man City.

An extremely lucky 3-2 victory provides the advantage for city as they go into the second leg in front...

Halfway through the week the Man city boss gets a phone call:

BOSS 'hello?'

DOC 'Hi this is the club doctor here, I'm afraid I've got some bad news.'

BOSS 'tell me'

DOC 'unfortuanetly our keeper has broken his finger in training'

BOSS 'That's no problem, he's got a very able deputy'

DOC 'aaah...he's unable to play as well, slipped disc I'm afraid'

BOSS 'WHAT! Then we'll have to play the young lad...whatisname...'

DOC 'If only we could sir, but unfortuanently our 3rd and 4th choice keepers are also on the injury list, we're down to the young 16 year old from the academy'

BOSS 'Oh no...'

Cue pandemonium in the streets of Bristol as the lads in red roll over the boys of Manchester 4-1, 7-2 on aggregate. Britol city are one game away from the Premiership!

Standing in their way are the Foxes, The mighty Leicester! And so it begins, a tight, scrappy affair, which ends at 2-2 after extra time. And now the anti climax...bristol city win. I can't remember who played or scored, all I know is that we won. Yay.

Strangely this season saw a jaded Neil Mellor, the Championship defenders seemed able to cope with his height and strength and he finished the season with a mediocre 12 goals.

The star of the season was last years christmas signing, Lars Iver Strand (AMC), playing 49 games, scoring 26 goals, with 9 assists and 10 MOM's, ending with an average rating of 7.31.

League position:

pos3 pld46 W24 D13 L9 F85 A53 pts 85

Steve Lansdown was unavailable for comment as he was attending a board of directors karaoke party and all that could be heard was tuneless chants of 'Money,Money,Money...'

[Simon the snail]

Season 08/09 - summary

Succesive Promotions for Bristol city meant they were expected to break at least one record in the premiership this season - least number of points.

Lansdowne, however was overly optimistic, piling the preesure on the manager before the season has even begun, 'We've finally arrived in our rightful place. now we will stay here, I've no doubt about that, and who knows? Maybe we can surprise everyone by playing in europe next season. The manager, whom myself and the board back fully, has a very generous transfer kitty this year and we expect to see many star names walking through these famous gates.'

On the transfer front the manager knows he needs an experienced premiership defence in order to survive, so he pays out 240k on Kiwi ryan Nelsen to partner Titus Bramble at the back. 1.3m is splashed out on impressive young right back Tony Mcmahon from Middlesborough, whose impressive performances last season finished him with an avr of 7.19. Igor Krulj, a young and very promising left back was bought from swedish club Halmstad for 100k and Liverpools young goalkeeper Scott Carson was the second most expensive signing, coming for 1.2m.

The first game of the season was against Manchester united and the city fans and players were eager to find out how they fared up against one of the best teams in the world. A 2-0 loss was quite kind on Bristol city as they saw very little of the ball and united treated the second half as a training session.

In the cups, city beat Newcastle 2-1 in the 3rd round of the league cup, only then to crash out on penalties against northampton in the next round. The FA cup was more fruitful for them, as the fans saw the first cup run for many years. On the way to a 1-0 defeat in the quarter final stage to Man u, city beat both Liverpool and Spurs 1-0 in replays in previous rounds.

The rest of the league season was relatively boring, City easily doing enough to stay clear of relegation, but never threatening the top half. The squad was bolstered in January by the signing of Simao from Spurs for 2.7m - who promptly snapped his ligaments and was out for the rest of the season.

Highlights were 2 wins against Palace (6-0 and 4-2), and 2 wins aginst Blackburn (5-0 and 5-3), whilst the low points were losses against chelsea (5-1), arsenal (7-0!), birmingham (4-1) and Liverpool (4-0).

league position

Pos 12th W10 D12 L16 F55 A63 pts42

The eventual finish was only 5 points off relegation but City were never really in the fight.

If there was any star players that year it would have been Lars Iver Strand again, who bagged 12 goals from midfield and ended the season with an avr of 7.31. Also Jean Paul Kielo Lezi showed some promise (and blistering pace) to score 16 goals and make 10 assists in the clubs first venture into the Premiership.

Chairman Lansdowne was satisfied with the performance, 'We expected better at the start of the season but I suppose looking back we now have a major foothold in the league and can begin to build next year. I am not sure how much cash will be available next season as the manager spent a massive 5.5 million this season - which was more than we anticipated. I think the squad is good enough to survive so we may bring some cost cutting measures in to place before next year.'

Because this season has been a very boring one, here are the winners and runner ups in certain competition over the past 4 years:

Premiership 06 world cup

winners Runners up 1st Germany

2006 Arsenal Tottenham 2nd Brazil

2007 Arsenal Man united 3rd Ghana!

2008 Arsenal Liverpool England lost 1-0

2009 Liverpool Arsenal in 2nd rnd vs

Chile.

Champions League Euro Champs

winners Runners up 1st England 3

2006 Bayern Juventus 2nd Spain 1

2007 Inter Man united

2008 Arsenal Man United

2009 Milan Arsenal

[Simon the snail]

That table again:

Premiership

_____Winners___Runners Up

2006 Arsenal___Tottenham

2007 Arsenal___Man United

2008 Arsenal___Liverpool

2009 Liverpool_Arsenal

World Cup 06

1st Germany

2nd Brazil

3rd Ghana!

England lost 1-0 to Chile in 2nd round

Champions League

_____Winners___Runners Up

2006 Bayern___Juventus

2007 Inter____Man United

2008 Arsenal__Man United

2009 Milan____Arsenal

Euro Championships 08

Final: England 3-1 Spain

[Simon the snail]

Season Summary - 09/10

When asked, all managers will agree that this is the hardest season, the one after the first season in the premiership. The team lacks that surprise factor now and they also lack the naivity that comes when you are first promoted. This is why Mr Lansdowne expects great things this year, just back from a pleasure cruise in the carribean he is very upbeat and ambitious: 'we made great leaps last year and are now of course an established premiership side. in my opinion this current squad is good enough to get a top half finish this season but some money is available if the manager thinks to have a crack at Europe. Our full backing is behind him and we expect a fantastic season in the league and cup competitions alike.'

The city manager does indeed spend the money, but possibly with a slightly different objective in mind...

6 foot 4 striker Russel Mwafulirwa is picked up on a free from Blackburn, Alvaro Recoba signs a player coaching role to the delight of fans. 110k is gambled on dmrl Danny Smith from Cardiff and Anthony Grant is brought in for 500k to provide cover to Dm Marcelo Sosa. the majority of the transfer budget is agin spent on improving the defence, Gianni Zuiverloo (DRC) a young Dutch defender is bought from Feyenoord for a whopping 4.7m. The sales of Jara and Bjorn Helge Riise raise 6.5m for the club and the manager goes crazy, splashing out 7m on unproven youngster lebohang Mokoena from Mallorca. When asked about his two record signings in a press conference he said this,

'I feel that less than 5 million for Gianni is an absoloute bargain as I have had my eye on him for more than a season now, and fully believe that he could become an integral part of not only Bristol city, but a very strong Holland squad too. As for Lebohang, he has pace. More pace than I've ever seen. He's young, and still green and we may not see the best of him this season but I do think that he could score a lot of goals for this club in the future.'

With the chairman now keen on European qualification, the manager is under a lot of pressure to succed. The friendlies go as planned, winning all 5 with a cumulative score of 20-3, which included a 6-1 drubbing of Anderlecht. Then, well...collapse. And on the 25th of October 2009, having played 11 games and gaining only 5 points, Bristol City are advertising for a new manager. In a statement released to the press, the chairman had this to say, 'after spending a massive amount of my money at the beginning of the year, and extremely dissapointing performances coming thereafter, I have no choice but to part with our current manager and wish him well in the future.' With Mick Mccarthy hot favourite for the job, the now ex Bristol city manager responded with his version of events, ' I feel extremely hard done by, to be honest. I've brought this club up from league one, given them complete financial security and they get rid of me as soon as things look a bit dodgy. I mean, come on..half the team were injured for crying out loud, we've hardly had enough time to learn each others names, let alone form a cohesive unit. good luck to the next manager, he'll need itso long as certain people are running that club'

The papers predicted a few months of cooling down for that man, before taking on another (premiership) job - possibly Everton or Blackburn they speculate.

two months pass and mcCarthy is starting to get some performances out of his Bristol City team, when, suddenly the papers are full of shock speculation;

'EX CITY MANAGER TALKS WITH STOKE'

'POTTERS GO FOR PREMIERSHIP EXPERIENCE' and in one of the tabloins;

'CHAIRMAN GISLASON ABDUCTS EX CITY MANAGER AND FORCES HIM TO TAKE THE JOB'

Indeed, by hook or by crook, on the 21st of December 20th position Championship side Stoke City appoint themselves a new manager.

He starts off brightly with a 3-1 victory away at Brighton but then enters the transfer window dissapointingly with a 2-0 defeat to Doncaster.

Stoke fans are very interested as to what their media 'friendly' manager is going to do during this important month, but are then distraught when they see a mass clearout!!

2.1m for star striker Sambegou Bangoura was seen as good business for the manager as he then promptly makes another half a million with the sales of first teamers John Quiglet, Peter sweeney, Darel Russel and Dan Harding. After a draw and a defeat in their next two games, the Stoke manager is under pressure to perform in the next game aginst Wolves. The Sky TV cameras pick out a few protesting banners in the crowd before the vital game against Woves. However, the manager is optimistic as in the morning he succesfully completed the signing of not one, not two, but eight players! (one was a loan signing) The most notable of these were Dexter Blackstock, a young striker, loaned from Southampton, Italian Youngster Vicenzo Esposito (free,DM), Christoffer Karlsson, a Swedish AMC, signed from Hibs for 275k, left sided Spanish striker Francisco Javier Lopez from Tenerife for 425k, and a certain Anthony Le Tallec who had run out of contract at Blackburn and was rushing to reach the stadium in time for his debut. Disgruntled fans felt that there would surely be confusion within the team when the match began due to the number of new faces...They were wrong. 4-1 to Stoke was the final score, having completely outplayed Wolves for 90 minutes. The stoke fans were jubilant!

Let us switch our focus now to the FA cup. Having beaten Forest Green 3-0 earlier on in the season, this new look Stoke side now faced a trip to Highbury to face off against the 06,07 and 08 premiership winners in the fourth round. Easy peasy. Full of confidence, this impressive looking Stoke side provided the shock of the season as they not only scored two goals, but kept a clean sheet as well. Suddenly the fans had a new favourite manager!

A 1-1 draw against Aston Villa in the fifth round meant a big replay, which, again Stoke became the giant killers - winning on penalties after a 2-2 draw. However, three Giants proved too much for Stoke as they lost 2-0 to Ipswich in the quarter final. Still, fans were not unhappy - they had not only seen their team compete with, but actually beat the best teams in the land! Naturally, the manager pulls his side out of the relegation zone, finishing in 16th position.

Here is the stats for Stoke before he took charge: W5 D7 L13

and after:W11 D3 L7

Stars of the season were Paul Gallagher whose 15 goals, 6 assists and avr of 7.34 was vital for the club. Also Loanee Dexter Blackstock scored 6 goals in 9 games before a broken leg saw him stretchered all the way back to Southampton. Christoffer Karlsson also showed future promise , finishing with an avr of 7.53.

League Position

pos 16th W16 D10 L20 F66 A67 pts 58

In other news - Mick Mccarthy did indeed save Bristol City, finishing 15th in the end but has made some dodgy signings for next season...

The premiership winners were Russian backed Chelsea followed by London rivals Tottenham.

The 2010 world Cup was also staged this year (it being 2010 and all..) Portugal won, beating England in the final nd Czecg Rep taking the third spot.

The champions league winners were Barcelona, stopping Chelsea from taking home an historic double.

[tom q]

this is great! well done and good luck with the future seasons

[tom q]

is there more to come? id love to see what happens

[Simon the snail]

Hi Tom,

Yes there is lots more to come (I'm 6 seasons ahead at the moment!!!). I plan to put up another season summary tomorrow evening (june 23rd). Sorry I haven't posted for a while - I've been quite busy.

p.s I'm really pleased someone is reading this and enjoying it! - thanks!!!

[tom q]

no problem! its great! shame about the sacking though! I like the way u've writen it. well ill check again tommorrow for the update hopefully

[Simon the snail]

Season summary - 10/11

Fans are unsure about how optimistic they should be this season. They finally seem to have a decent manager and this is his first full season in charge. Some believe that with some key pre season signings they could be in the playoffs, others think this a long term rebuilding job. All agree however, that the manager must keep the likes of Ryan Hall and Lewis Grabban - 2 up and coming young English stars, and keep the same 442 formation which gave some fantastic displays during the second half of the season.

The chairman is optimistically gloomy with his pre season report;

'i am extremely glad that the manager saw us safely through the second half of last season. I am also very hopeful that we will be able to build on the success we had last season - and we will try to give the manager every possible opportunity to build on it...except of course the finances. We are slowly breaking even and I predict that within one or two seasons we may finally be out of the red, but sadly, this season, if the manager wishes to buy players he will have to sell them first.' We all have full confidence in the manager and team and are 100% sure he will continue to lead us in the right direction.'

The Stoke manager goes into the first game of the season against Cardiff with 7 new faces.

These are young striker Dean Bowditch, bought on a bosman from Middlesbrough, very promising goalkeeper David Button from Wigan, Veteran DRC Pablo Mills is brought back to England for 100k after spending a season in St Mirren. Also Welsh DLC Lewin Nyatanga is brought in for 140k, which is the same amount of money handed over to Leicster for Italian DM Nicola Beati (yes, another DM!). Simon Williams, "The next Paul Robinson" is bought for 350k from S****horpe, and to complete the summer signings, a familiar name is taken on loan. Out of favour at Bristol City, Tim Sparv rejoins his old manager for a season in the championship.

How did he manage those signings with no transfer budget? the fans ask each other. Then the news comes through - he has made 2.4m through the sale of two first team players...they are young, English and just making their debuts for Norwich city and Luton town...they are Ryan Hall and Lewis Grabban. Fans begin to show their dissaproval in a less than quiet way, and very soon the protest banners are dusted off and flying once again.

In the press conference before the match, the Stoke manager is asked about his strange activity in the transfer market,

REPORTER: 'why did you sell your most promising players?'

BOSS: 'they wanted to go and I got a fair price for them'

REPORTER: ' but they were surely indispensible to the club?'

BOSS: 'um...obviously they were not'

REPORTER: ' you've now got no left winger, who do you have in mind to fill this position?'

BOSS: 'I don't'

REPORTER: 'you mean you will play someone out of position?'

BOSS: 'no, I won't play a left winger'

REPORTER: 'but how can it be 442 without a left winger?'

BOSS: 'it won't'

Shock number 2 for the fans. The stoke team emerge from the tunnel and there seems to be a lack of wingers and a slight excess of DM's. In fact the formation is 4-3-0-1-2. 'How defensive!!', the crowd scream, 'We're never gonna score any goals!!'...cue Stoke city 4, Cardiff city 4.

An interesting start to the manager's first full season in charge of Stoke. Unfortuanetly it all quietens down after that and some could say that the rest of the season was rather dull.

With a couple of escapades into the playoff places, stoke eventually lost one too many games and settled down to finish the season in eighth place. The manager spent an extra 1.4m in January on 3 players, czech youngster Josef Broz (DL) seemed to have a bright future ahead of him- he was bought for 90k and immediately loaned out to numerous league one sides. 700k was spent on Racing's super Peruvian, Pablo Ore, who, ironically turned out to be a better left winger than striker, which was the position he was bought for. The third and final transfer was of Simon Watson, a young just-turned-seventeen year old who had impressed greatly for Norwich city, scoring 5 goals in the 11 games he had played for. In his wisdom, the Stoke manager snapped him up immediately, payimg out a whopping 675k in compensation. When asked by a reporter about this signing, he replied 'believe me, it'll be worth it'...ominous...and putting a lot of pressure on the shoulders of the kid. However, he performed okay for Stoke, showing off his blistering pace in his debut (a 3-0 victory against Wolves in january, which sparked a 4 game winning run for stoke), and scoring 4 goals in 14 appearances.

There was no way that he was going to break up this new strike partnership though, Paul Gallacher again shows his class, scoring 14 goals and setting up 12 with an avr of 7.26, and his new strike partner, young Dean Bowditch scores 12 gls and gets 10 assists. all three Dm's kept their place throughout the season, Tim Sparv, Nicola Beati, and Stoke favourite Tom Daemen all finished the season with avr 7.2-7.33.

pos 8th w22 d8 l16 for70 ag51 pts 74

The chairmans end of season statement was a positive one: ' We are very happy withh the consistency of performances this season and are pleased that the manager has achieved a very respectable top half finish. We expect to see a continued improvement next year which will be possible because I am extremely pleased to announce that due to a new sponsorship deal, amongst other things, our finances are now no longer a worry - there will be some funds available for transfers next season.'

He actually gave this statement outside the Brittania Stadium, with no holiday scheduled until all the important paperwork is out of sight.

In other news, man utd won the premiership, followed by Liverpool and then by Arsenal in 3rd. The champions league was won by Inter, beating Real Madrid 2-1.

The top scorer in the championship was Collins John, scoring 58 (fifty eight!!!) league goals, and in doing so, helping his team Fulham into 3rd spot and subsequent playoff success. Seeing Fulham only scored 74 league goals, they were unable to hang onto him and he left for Mallorca for a bargain 4.8m.

Oh yes, and Bristol city finished rock bottom of the premiership...shame. Although surprisingly McCarthy kept his job. There have been tabloid reports that the Stoke manager has been spotted in betting shop, allegedly putting cash on a 5-0 stoke victory vs Bristol City next season...but that is for next season.

[Simon the snail]

not sure why there are stars by s****horpe...oh well.

[Simon the snail]

oh yes, I see now.

[tom q]

good stuff! haha keep it coming if you can

[Simon the snail]

Season Summary 2011/2012

With big performances and 'continued improvement' expected from Stoke city and their manager this season, the last thing he wanted was to be questioned by the authorities about allegedly placing certain bets on his team. The investigations continued 6 games into the season until, after a run of 5 games without a victory (including an embarrassing 1-0 defeat to Bristol City), they were eventually convinced that there was no match fixing going on and that the betting 'scandal' was just a tabloid story.

With such a disrupted beginning to the season, the manager was only able to bring three new faces to the club. The first signing was 500k well spent on Sunderland's very impressive centre back cum midfielder - Asa Hall. The next two bosman signings signalled the manager’s intent this season and saw the Stoke supporters officially burning their old, dusty protest banners. David Beckham, ex England captain, was persuaded to leave Everton and step down a division and end his career for Stoke city as player coach. Another England legend quickly followed. This time it was veteran rock Sol Campbell, arriving to install much needed experience into the back line, which previously had an average age of 21.

Of course these high status players arrivals meant that other players were unable to stay, and the manager, with a new 4-1-2-1-2 formation in mind said goodbye to four of last years first-teamers. Anthony Le Tallec was unable to fulfil any of his promise and after one too many arguments in training, he was sold for 250k. Lewin Nyatanga and Pablo Mills went for 50k each - Mills because he was too old and Nyatanga because Josef Broz made huge leaps in the reserves last year and is widely expected to start as first choice left back this year. One other player left Stoke during the pre season - Kenny Lunt, one of the fans favourites-he couldn't agree to a new deal and left the club after a ridiculous number of years.

With things looking dodgy after 6 games and the memory of a previous sacking still raw, the manager needs to get some results fast. The fans were beginning to raise funds for new, bigger than ever, protest banners which meant that the next game against Leicester was going to be a much more important game that anyone would have thought at the beginning of the season. But, like all the tests that this team has been entered into, they passed. A 2-0 victory was enough to appease the fans, and this new counter attacking style was kept on.

The team hit some decent form after this and, although they were too far behind the top two to threaten, Stoke soon established themselves as definite playoff chasers. The manager even allowed the players two exciting cup runs...

In the league cup 1st round Stoke convincingly overcame Carlisle 3-1, and Bury by the same score in the 2nd. It was in these games that young striker Simon Watson began to turn himself into a starter rather than a super sub, but with Bowditch and Francisco Javier Lopez performing so well during the early season, (Gallachers form dipped this year...a lot) he would have to show something extra special to take one of their shirts. In the 3rd round, Stoke played their first top flight side in Bolton. Fans expected Stoke to sit tight and hopefully score from a Beckham set piece - but, as per usual, the manager did the complete opposite and they eventually ran out 4-3 winners in a thrilling match.

So when, in the 4th round Stoke met Premiership side Southampton, they were unafraid and extremely confident. Stoke won 3-0 and marched on to the Quarter finals where they met last years playoff winners Fulham, minus Collins John, of course. This being the worst team the Stoke side had faced in three rounds, they let their confidence get the better of them and ended up losing 3-2...but there was still the FA cup!! After a 4-2 3rd round win against rivals Crewe, and a 1-1 draw then 1-0 replay victory against Luton, the Stoke players found themselves running out of the tunnel with the famous hymn 'you'll never walk alone' ringing in their ears. Yes, they had drawn premiership runners up in the fifth round. The players again managed to rise to the big occasion and played fantastically for 35 minutes until a moment of magic saw them troop into the dressing room one behind. In the second half, Liverpool looked like the championship team, and eventually, in the 80th minute a penalty was awarded to Stoke. 'With Beckham on the pitch, this should be a certain goal', the fans tell each other, their mouths full of fingernails...but, what's this? He's handed the ball to Nicola Beati, a man who has only scored 1 goal for his club!! Up he steps...and scores!!! What was all the fuss about? It seems that the manager wasn't actually present for the goal - he had gone to the toilet. Unfortunately the players couldn't repeat the performance in the replay and succumbed to a 1-0 loss in the replay to end their second and last cup run of the season.

However, it wasn't long until the playoffs and potential premiership football next season. With stoke established in 3rd place the manager was able to begin early preparations for whoever they may meet in the first playoff game. It happened to be Sheffield united, and Stoke happened to thrash them 5-0, with a Bowditch hatrick and 1st teamer Simon Watson bagging 1. The fifth goal was an own goal by jagielka a made sure that there was no way back into the tie for united. Resting key players in the second leg, Stoke lost 3-2, with Simon Watson amongst the scorers yet again. They were off to Wembley!!

Blackburn were the opponents and there was a nervous buzz around the ground as the players took their positions for the first half. One half of the stadium was in seventh heaven after 45 seconds saw their team take the lead. Some poor defending by Stoke let Miller in to allow his team to put one foot in the premiership.

As it turned out, 1 goal was all they needed, as they put everyone behind the ball and Stoke were unable to break them down for the whole 90 mins.

The chairman was not so downhearted, however, in his end of season report: 'I am extremely proud of the staff and players, who have performed exceptionally well all season, and only narrowly missing out on a fantastic reward for their efforts. I wish for more of the same next year and expect that with the experience that this year brought everyone at the club, we can strive to bring premiership football to the Brittania stadium in two seasons time, without the need for the lottery of the play-offs’’.' Bang. There you go Mr Manager, a huge choice -1st?..or 2nd? No pressure. Good luck.

The first team

GK David Button

DR Danny Butterfield

DC Asa Hall

DC Sol Campbell

Dl Josef Broz - pld36 assists12 avr7.44

Dm Nicola Beati - avr7.47

MC Pablo Ore - pld39 Gls7 Ast12 avr7.31

MC David Beckham - Pld51 Ast17 avr7.44

AMC Christoffer Karlsson- p48 Gls17 Ast9 avr7.40

FC Dean Bowditch - pld36 Gls18 ast8 avr7.42

FC F J Lopez - pld39 Gls18 Ast 8 avr7.23

or FC Simon Watson - pld 16(22) Gls 14 Asts13

League Position

Pos 3rd W23 D8 L15 F100 A63 Pts77

Bristol City finished 10th, and Stoke beat them 4-0 in the second meeting between the two teams.

The premiership winners were Arsenal, Liverpool were second again and Man U finished 3rd.

Euro 2012 saw England attempt to retain their title. They fell short at the final hurdle, losing 2-1 to Holland in the final.

Again there was no English finalist in the champions’ league. Roma beat Werder Bremen on pens after a 1-1 draw.

With major pressure on his shoulders, and a team who are favourites for the title, can the Manager fulfil the board expectations, win the title, and keep his job?

[Guest]

That was a top read

[Simon the snail]

Thanks very much Kakbag, I hope to continue updating it every 3 or 4 days.

[tom q]

brilliant mate well done, ill look out for this story

[matteo52]

Great story mate. Stick with it

[Simon the snail]

Season Summary - 2012/2013

Early on in the pre season the Stoke manager admitted that this is the most pressure he has ever felt as a manager and just can't wait for the season to get underway. The fans are very similar, they are excited but are trying to restrain themselves. They know they have the team to take them to the premiership (bar one or two signings which should come along soon anyway...won't they?) but the older fans have ben there before - where the players have had too much pressure and expectation heaped on them and fail to deliver when the season comes around.

The transfers everyone was hoping for did come eventually and the manager put his trust mainly in the hands of the existing squad - bar 3 signings. They were right back Greg Halford from Preston on a free, replacing the retiring Danny Butterfield. To replace the retring David Beckham talented swede Emil Samuelsson was bought for 750k from Cardiff. Also Tim Sparv was bought (yet again) for 300k from leicester to add depth to the squad. There were no first team players sold or released, although Sol Campbell left to become assistant manager at Doncaster.

The big question on the fans' lips was 'who is going to be the new captain?'

Many fans wanted to see either Dean Bowditch or Asa Hall to lead by example, whilst others felt that young Josef Broz had all the credentials to make a great skipper. They all agreed that Beckham was going to leave a very very big hole to fill. So the man himself solved that dilemna by pledging his services to the team for another year in return for a player/assistant manager role at the club. Needless to say, fans were ecstatic. Now they really felt they had a great chance of promotion this year.

They were dissapointed on the first day of the season, when Stoke narrowly lost 3-2 to Cardiff, and when they drew 1-1 against Bristol City a few days later, there was a few mutterings about the managers choice of formation this year. In a radio phone in one season ticket holder came up with these wise words, 'Although we loved the 4-1-2-1-2 formation last year, most of the fans feel that it's just not working this year. It was a surprise element last year and we did well from it but this year other clubs have done there homework on us and we're being caught out down the wings too much' When asked what formation he would like to see, he replied '4-4-2'. This opinion was voiced by manay Stoke fans in a poll on the fanclub website, and for the first time ever, after another average eight games, the manager agreed with the fans and changed his system. Despite a blip in the league cup 1st rnd (a 3-1 loss to league 2 side Rochdale), the team started to perform like potential promotion chasers. Dean Bowditch seemed to be loving this new formation and helped his team to the following results, one after the other; 4-0, 5-2, 4-1, 4-1, 4-2, 5-1. After these 6 victories in which Stoke averaged 4.3 goals per game, they were firmly positioned in top spot in the league and looking unbeatable. Many people were not only praising the change in formation, but also the change in goalkeeper which came with it. Indeed the manager had decided to drop David Button after one too many dodgy games, and handed the gloves to 'the next Paul Robinson' - Simon Williams, who performed extremely consistently, albeit with a cushion of 4.33 goals for his first six matches!

two other notable results before the FA cup 3rd round match against Bristol City were, a 7-1 thrashing of Tranmere, and a 6-0 dress rehearsal victory against the red team from Bristol. Of course everyone knows that the winner of the dress rehearsal is not neccesarily the winner of the cup tie. It should be noted at this time that Bristol City were lying 2nd in the championship so the 6-0 defeat was highly embarassing for them and they were determined to make amends in the cup. As it happened, the aggregate score was 10-1 to Stoke, an under average goals per game result of 4-1 was easily enough to propel Stoke into the fourth round and a tasty trip to Villa Park... To be Continued...(a certain Germany vs Argentina QF has started)

[tom q]

great well done

[Simon the snail]

12/13 continued...

As an extremely well known giant killing side, sky tv were straight over to Villa park in anticipation of a mouth watering tie. Stoke fans were very optimistic and expecting a victory due to their team performing so well at the top of the championship. The ground was a sell out and the noise was deafening as the teams walked out onto the pitch. The noise was even more deafening as Villa took the game by the throat and scored in the 2nd minute. It was only down to some great defending and even better goalkeeping that stoke managed to walk in at half time with only the one goal deficit. The players came out for the second half with a motivational churchillesque teamtalk ringing in their ears, and were promptly inspired. Bowditch continued his fantastic season by scoring in the 45th minute and a delicious christoffer Karlsson strike gave Stoke a 2-1 lead in the 46th. Villa were stunned by these two, quick goals and it took Luke Moore until the 74th minute to get one back, by which time Karlsson had scored his second and Stokes third. With the game at 3-2 and 15 minutes to go, the Stoke manager brought on Simon Watson, to see if his pace would worry the Villa defence. It did. In the 79th minute he took it past two players before lobbing the despairing keeper to give Stoke the victory and open the door to the next round in the FA cup!

The fifth round was against Milwall, who Stoke had beaten 2-1 and 4-0 in previous meetings this season. The latter result was repeated with Bowditch scorring one, Lopez bagging two, and Watson coming off the bench and scoring again - a header this time, from a Beckham free kick.

The quarter final was a trickier tie against Portsmouth, and although the previous results of 5-2 and 4-0 favoured Stoke, Portsmouth were currently looking very dangerous in attack with pacy striker sharing the lead with Bowditch at the top of the goalscoring charts. With goalkeeper Williams looking like the next Chris Kirkland (injury prone), David Button was getting an extended run in the team, and with Beckham recovering from a knock in the previous game, he was given the armband for this quarter final versus Portsmouth.

[Jack O\'Sullivan]

Alias just screaming out here

[Simon the snail]

Doh! Server went down. I also went on holiday for the past week so I am sorry for the delay. Here is the rest of the 2012/2013 season:

Stoke started brightly, with Dean Bowditch grabbing the lead in the 14th minute, but then Stoke went to sleep for the rest of the match, eventually letting Gary O'Neill force a replay in the 73rd minute with a thunderbolt of a shot.

The replay started just as tightly...for two minutes at least, then Jona scored in the second minute, causing Portsmouth to bring all their men behind the ball proving extremely difficult for Stoke to break them down. But break them down they did, but Bowditch had to wait until the 69th minute before he could equalize for his team. No more goals came in normal time, and another 30 minutes of football was needed in order to separate the two sides. Penalties was looking probable after 10 mins in the first half, where both teams were being extremely cautious, until, suddenly a chance for a counter fell to Stoke - Greg Halford sprayed the ball across field to Emil Samuelsson, who, noticing the surging run of Lopez, split the defence in two with a fantastic through ball which Lopez took round the keeper and slotted calmly into the net. Portsmouth tried to attack then, but left themselves very open at the back and the score ended up 4-1 to Stoke, although the match was much, much tighter than that. Nevertheless, Stoke city were in the Semi finals and facing their toughest test yet. They were up against a midfield quartet of Obi Mikel, Messi, Lennon and Rooney, and Beckham was asking the manager if he could be rested for the 4 league games leading up to this tie...yes Stoke city were facing Manchester United for a place in the FA cup final!

Turning up for the match at Wembley brought back memories of the players’ previous visit to this ground - a certain playoff defeat last year. They were determined to not let this happen again. Having secured the Championship crown fifteen days previously, the whole team had had the benefit of a fortnights rest to prepare for this game and the manager was hoping that this would be the telling factor in today’s game. He said as much to the reporter who accosted him outside the ground;

REPORTER: How is your team going to contend with these undoubtedly world class players?

BOSS: Sure, they've got the class, but have they got the legs?

They seemed to believe they had the legs for the first three or four minutes of the game. The Stoke players seemed slightly overawed by the occasion and the big names they were up against but luckily David Button (yes, Williams was injured, again.) was able to pull off some fantastic saves to keep the score at 0-0. Then, after 5 minutes, something very strange happened, United seemed to lose all concentration - maybe they were demoralised that they hadn't managed to score yet against lower division opposition, but they cheaply conceded a corner and Beckham made them pay. A typically perfect cross found the head of Dean Bowditch on the far post and Stoke were 1-0 up with 85 minutes left to play!!

Expecting united to respond immediately, the Stoke players put many men behind the ball and prepared to defend the first half away. When the devastating attack failed to come, mainly thanks to some fantastic defensive midfield work from Nicola Beati, Stoke began to gain some confidence. They began to push forward more and managed to take control of the midfield. Now it was united who were pressurised and forced to defend. Then in the 14th minute, the pressure was too much for united when they conceded a free kick in a dangerous position. Beckham struck it, it was on target but the keeper made a great save to stop Stoke going two up...But, what's this? He couldn't hold on to it!! The ball's loose and has been parried out into the path of an onrushing Francisco Javier Lopez who has an empty goal to aim at, and he does not miss.

2-0 to Stoke and only 14 minutes gone!! To make matters worse for united, Wayne Rooney got himself sent off in the 27th minute and Stoke dominated from then on in. With 53% possession and 21 shots, Stoke came away slightly disappointed that they hadn't actually won by more goals, then the realization hit them...They were in the FA cup Final!! So much expecting to go out in this round, the players had completely overlooked the fact that they were only two - now one - game away from lifting the famous trophy! With an amazing double on the cards, one that no one ever dreamed would happen, the Stoke players were glued to the TV, awaiting the result of the other Semi final between Newcastle and Crystal Palace. It was a shock result; Palace had won 3-1! Although they were a premiership team, they were not of the quality of United, or even Aston Villa, the players told each other.

The team was again rested for the final two league games of the season, meaning they missed out on the hundred point milestone by one point. But no one involved with Stoke cared one bit, they were all completely focussed on the biggest game in the clubs long history.

Eventually the day came around, the day everyone had been waiting for. Stoke had performed so well this season that most bookies had them even favourites with Palace to win. Excitement was high on both sides of the ground, the Palace supporters too, seeing this as their best chance of gaining themselves some silverware, and a place in Europe next season of course. The manager's final words to his Stoke team before the game was to remind them of the last time they were over confident against perceived weaker opposition. They had lost, so don't make the mistake twice. The players obviously hadn't listened though, as Andy Johnson found himself without a marker and slotted home after 3 minutes to give Crystal Palace the lead. Stoke were awful for the rest of the first half, and most of the second - maybe the occasion had got to them, but they didn't look like scoring at all. So it was lucky for them that the other team did it for them, Louis Saha's fantastic finish from a Beckham cross gave Stoke the equalizer in the 79th minute. Stoke were now geared up for attack due to the manager panicking in the 75th to try to get a goal from his team. Stoke woke up for the last 10 minutes though, and played some sublime football, and five minutes later Pablo Ore received the ball on the edge of the box from a corner and volleyed the ball Scholes like into the top corner of the net. That was surely the winner!! It wasn't. In the 92nd minute Nicola Beati received the ball 40 yards out, a palace player tried to wrestle the ball from under his feet but Beati evaded him, pushing the ball slightly forward to give himself room, the defensive midfielder then smashed the ball home from 35 yards out to give Stoke the trophy, a lot of money, the double, and a place in Europe next year!!

What a season! The star man this season was undoubtedly Dean Bowditch who played 45 league games and 7 cup games, scoring 41 in the league and six in the cup. He also made a record 31 assists to finish with an avr of 7.93, which was enough to win him Championship player of the year and Stoke fans player of the year for the 3rd time. Lopez also chipped in with 24 goals while Watson came off the bench to score 15. Karlsson also managed 11 goals and 13 assists. The chairman was left speechless and his end of season report sounded something like this,

'Wow'

When he was asked for a little bit more a few days later, he came up with the following,

'I am absolutely ecstatic with the teams performance and am very proud that I am involved with a club that have managed to achieve a feat that many thought impossible in the present day, winning the FA cup whilst not being in top flight. But to then win the Championship so convincingly made this season even better. After the consistent performances over this season and the performance we have seen in this team, the board and I have made a few decisions, we have extended our managers contract, and decided to increase the capacity of the stadium to a European premiership standard of 42124 seats. This will not be the only change made to the stadium, as of July the 14th, a statue of our current manager will be erected outside the gates of the stadium to signify this remarkable achievement he and his players have done on this, Stoke city’s one hundred and fiftieth year since its founding.

Looking forward, to next year, I have no doubt we will survive and am very excited about the prospect of playing in the uefa cup as well.'

A statue, eh? Quick get out while you’re a hero, Mr Manager! Oh no, he's staying on, there's still more to achieve with this club.

league position

pos 1st W31 D6 L9 F131 A56 GD+75 pts 99

Bristol city came 2nd, 11 points behind and 15-3 down on aggregate to Stoke after 5 games.

In the premiership, Chelsea were champions, with Arsenal second and Newcastle, losing FA cup semi finalists, third. In the Champions league, there was an English representative in the final but Arsenal lost 2-1 to Roma.

Well, at the end of that season, the manager see's himself back in the same position he was in in 2008. When asked whether he felt that way, he replied,

'No, this team is far better than the team from '08. It is a premiership team already and can only get stronger each year as the younger players gain more and more experience. I can't see staying up being a problem...' We'll see.

[Wimb The Barman]

Nice short story easy to follow, kutgw

[lim]

very nice to read simon, btw are you a stokie?

[jongray84]

i am enjoying this Tread esp enjoyed the BC team you done well i am BC on the first season and ummm COUGH will make a post after 3 season`s

[Simon the snail]

Thanks for the feedback guys - much appreciated.

For Lim, no, I am not a Stokie, but I will have a soft spot for them when the new season starts. The same happened in 1996 (god, is that really 10 years ago?) when I managed some Scottish team called St Johnstone - I'm still following them now.

What are your expectations for your team this season? Will we see them in the prem in the next few years? (in real life!)

For Jongray84, good luck with your BC team, one tip - try to stay on Mr Lansdowne's buddy list!!

BC have a decent team (especially in defence), but lack any quality strikers. Looking forward to reading your post.

[Simon the snail]

Season Summary 2013-2014

After promising a non relegation threatened season this season, the pressure was on for the manager in Stokes first season in the premier league. The board, however tried to do their pest to take away some of that pressure. Here is what the chairman had to say:

'We are all extremely excited to see how this squad can get on in their...our first season in the top flight. For those fans who expect immediate success, let me tell you this, winning the FA cup is completely different to surviving in the premiership. Yes we know we can beat the best teams, but the trick to staying up, so I've been told, is to beat these teams consistently, score lots of goals, have a good home record...and a lot of money. I am pleased to say that we are not lacking for money this season and more may become available depending on how successful we are in the UEFA cup.'

With the pundits split half and half, over whether Stoke will stay up, they feel that the telling point could be if the squad can cope with all the other competitions too. One well known pundit had this to say;

'Ah dunnae thank tha' Stoooke will stay oop. With tha sloppy defendin' they had last season, thaey have nay got a chance. Anyway, ye dunnae win anythang with kids.'

Bad news in the pre season for Stoke as 3 players, feeling they have made their names now, quit Stoke on a bosman transfer. Nicola Beati heads back to Italy to play for italian super power Lecce, Christoffer Karlsson shows his ambition by joining Aston Villa, and Tom Daemen leavesto join...no one. Whoops! slight miscalculation there Tom! What's that? You want to come back? tough luck mate!

The incoming players this year are slightly more numerous than previous years. Young English Centre back Rossi Jarvis joins Stoke on a bosman from a team where first team opportunities where slightly limited - Chelsea. Two young Finnish players were brought in for a cumulative 3k by a scouts reccomendation. These are striker Markus Kinnunen, and midfielder Esa Pekka Raisanen. Versatile Swedish youngster Niklas Andersson joins the club for 8k. The final youngster to join this year is Graham Richardson, who will be understudy to Josef Broz at left back. The final 3 signings were the ones to make the fans excited. Finally, they say, the manager's gone for experience - having already forgotten Beckham, campbell etc - as fans do.

These three veterans are, centre back Aaron Mokoena (the second Mokoena bought by the manager in his career) from Blackburn for a sum of 1.6m, Daniel de Ridder who is a right winger , taken from Celta for free, and Andres D'Alessandro, who has agreed to end his career at Stoke after having a poor last season with Liverpool.

The first test for Stoke was the community Shield. The team travelled to Wembley, passing the chelsea bus outside the gates - it appeared to be broken down- and began to prepare for yet another match at this ground. The slight mishap with their team bus seemed to have shaken Chelsea as they never looked like getting into the game and Stoke signalled their intent by thrashing the blues 4-1, with D'allesandro scoring two, Lopez one, and Watson 1. The league started relatively well, everyone could see that they were not going to be troubled by relegation this season, unless they were hit with a lot of injuries. The first significant game was a EURO cup 1st round game versus Trabzonspor. The team were not troubled playing against foreign opposition and overcame the hostile crowds to win 3-1 away, and then 2-0 back home. Simon Watson was the star in that tie, scoring 3 of the 5 goals.

League form started to improve for stoke and they registered victories against Arsenal (2-0) and Bristol city (4-1), which clearly delighted the Stoke manager. Then came the first EURO cup group game. It was a potentially slippery game against Scottish outfit Dundee United. The 7-0 victory made the travelling Stoke supporters relatively pleased. The four goals scored by Simon Watson prompted calls for him to be called up to the England squad. But it was in fact the other striker, Dean Bowditch who got his international Debut first, coming off the bench to partner Jermain Defoe in attack for the last 30 minutes of an England friendly.

The next Euro cup game was against Mallorca, and they were a step up in class from Dundee, the 1-1 draw proving that point. However the team recovered, going on to beat Stuttgart 4-0 and Dinamo Kiev 3-1 to register a place in the first knockout round. Many people expected Stoke to get through, but not quite in the style they did it in.

One dissapointment in the first half of the season was taht the reserve team could not overcome league 2 Doncaster in the league cup 3rd round, losing 3-2. A 5-4 victory over Everton, and 2-1 versus Man Utd, kept the crowd singing into the EURO cup 1st round tie versus Slavia Prague. They defended well, but just did not have the class to do anything against a well drilled and gelled Stoke side and lost 3-0 on aggregate.

Sitting in seventh in the league, in the EURO cup 2nd round, beating Sunderland 5-0 in the FA cup 3rd round Bowditch(3) Lopez(2), and Portsmouth 2-0 in the 2nd round, left everyone to do with football very inpressed With the season they were having. One person who was not impressed was a certain pundit;

'ookay, tha team ha' done well soo fa'. But tha's jus' beginnas luck ye ken. The real test is nex' season. They'll struggle then, ah guarantee et. Aye.' The beginners continued to progress in the EURO cup, winning 4-1 against PSV in the quarter final 1st leg, only to scrape through after losing 4-2 away in the second leg. After a 2-0 victory over Liverpool in the 5th round of the FA cup, the manager was heard to say ' the players are starting to feel it a bit now. They are getting slightly fatigued and and taking longer to recover. It was always going to happen because I've stuck with pretty much the same team all season. We are safe in the league now, so maybe I will begin rotating players.'

A 3-1 victory against Bristol City followed, then the FA cup holders crashed out in the quarter finals, losing an uninspiring match 2-0 versus Bolton. Things then got worse when, after a fantastic 2-1 victory over Villareal in the first leg - thanks to two goals from sub Markus Kinnunen, the team had a lot of injuries and lost the second leg 4-2 with a half strength side to go out of the EURO cup in the last eight stage.

With only the league to focus on, Stoke picked up their form and and won a few straight games to finish the season in a lofty fifth position. Not bad for your first season in the top flight. The chairman thought so too;

'this is a fantastic season for Stoke. We have announce ourselves on the world stage with our fantastic run in the EURO cup, and have a chance to go one better in the competition next year. This is also great as we will have pulling power to attract the big names, and big money available to buy them.' The manager was ecstatic at this news, having lost out early on in the season on signing future great Cees Janssen due to the bidding exceeding the clubs transfer budget. On next season the chairman had this to say;

'I hope for more of the same next season, where we continue to establish ourselves as one of the best clubs in Europe. Hopefully we can begin to build a squad next year which is capable of challenging the top four in the future. We are all in full support of the manager and hope he can lead us to future success.'

In the premiership Arsenal were champions followed by Liverpool, with chelsea in third. Leeds were fourth, with Man utd just escaping relegation on the last day of the season.

Liverpool won the champions league with a 3-0 victory over Sevilla.

In the world cup, hosts Italy struggled to make an impact, and Argentina beat Holland 1-0 in the final. The third placed team was none other than Scotland, and Guess what? England lost in the second round. Against Germany. on penalties. After throwing awy a 2-0 lead. morons.

Bristol city came rock bottom so will be unable to be thrashed by Stoke next season. (the 'trailer' for next season is in the first posts picture by the way.)

[jongray84]

KUTGchampionsnextW

[lim]

i wish i could say yes they will be in the prem in the next season but i cant see it happening, we need to rebuild the squad and get a decent long term manager who knows what hes doing, now we have new owner he is promissing to bring us glory so it sounds promissing but dont get your hopes up.

[Simon the snail]

Forgot this bit:

League positions 2013-2014

pos 5th W17 D11 L10 F75 A55 pts62

Best players,

Dean Bowditch 4 England caps 35 games 25 goals 14 assists avr 7.51

Simon Watson, 3 England caps, 2 goals 37 games 16 goals 10 assists avr 7.11 ( Watson did actually replace Bowditch in the England squad for his first two games, but Bowditch did enough to be called up too for his 4th cap, Watsons 3rd)

Aaron Mokoena avr 7.37 ( just a rock at the back, could not do without him)

[Simon the snail]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by lim:

i wish i could say yes they will be in the prem in the next season but i cant see it happening, we need to rebuild the squad and get a decent long term manager who knows what hes doing, now we have new owner he is promissing to bring us glory so it sounds promissing but dont get your hopes up. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Unfortuanetly you have Tony Pulis in charge. I may be wrong but I can't ever remember a team progressing with Pulis at the helm - he managed Bristol City for a year or so and played 'hump it up the field and hope' football. With any luck, he has learnt from his (many) past mistakes and finally will succeed at what must be one of his favourite clubs.

[Simon the snail]

Season Summary 2014/2015

With Stoke still being tipped for relegation despite the promises from manager and chairman in pre season, the cobblers have a lot to prove this season. The chairman did indeed have money available and the manager, sensing a need to strengthen the squad made use of it. First of all bringing in Brazilian Dm Tacio on a bosman from Chelsea (where he was bought for 11m and never played!), then winger James Morrison from Wigan for free. 3m was given to Birmingham for the services of 23 year old left winger Liam Moseley. Gianni Zuiverloon was bought from Bristol city for 3m, centre back Jack Wilson was a 3.1m gamble from Championship side Hartlepool, and feeling the need for a new keeper, the stoke manager splashed out 5.25m on Liverpool’s reserve keeper, 21 year old Ian Hughes..

After spending nearly 15m, the fans and pundits expected a bit of a clear out, and not wanting to disappoint, the manager did just that. Defenders Anez, Hill, Markovic, Connoly and Molteberg were sold or released, bringing in a 2.7m profit. Lars Iver Strand followed fellow Norwegian Molteberg to Qpr on a free transfer and Daniel de Ridder left to join Maccabi Haifa for 500k where he was promised money and first team football.

With a virtually new midfield, new keeper, and new centre backs, the Stoke line up for their first league game against Arsenal was expected to look very different to the one which ended last season. The PA system announced to the fans that the manager was sticking to a 4-4-2 system and then proceeded to call out the line up:

GK – Hughes

DR – Halford

DL – Broz ©

DC – Mokoena

DC – Jarvis

MR – Samuelsson

ML – Ore

MC – D’Allesandro

MC – Tacio

FC - Bowditch

FC – Watson

So a grand total of two new signings started in the 3-2 victory versus Arsenal, with Watson scoring two, Bowditch one.

The league continued to go well for Stoke, beating Liverpool 3-0 in their next game in which both Moseley and Morrison played some part. They even coped with the 3 month hamstring injury to Simon Watson. 2 defeats in a row ( including an embarrassing 5-3 loss to the hands of QPR) , no decent AMC, and lots of good centre backs, caused the manager to change his formation, opting for an extremely counter attacking 5-3-2 option, which did not require any AMC. This sparked new life in the Stoke team in the league and they went on to win 6 straight league games through October and November, finding themselves third in the league, a point behind Newcastle and miles away from runaway leaders (again!) Arsenal.

In the Uefa cup, Stoke faced Skonto in the first round. A 3-0 aggregate victory saw them drawn in a group with Hertha BSC, Maccabi Haifa, Palermo and Shakhtar.

Losing 1-0 to Hertha in the first game was not a good sign for Stoke, and many fans were left wondering whether their team may make an early exit this year. But Stoke bounced back with a 5-0 victory against M Haifa (Bowditch scoring 2, Lopez, Watson and Broz the other three). They then beat Palermo 2-1 and Lopez scored all four in the 4-0 victory over Shakhtar to see the Cobblers into the knockout stages, where they faced Mallorca.

Meanwhile in the league cup Stoke had been steadily progressing with their second team, showing that the manager is not too bothered with the cups this year. Many fans were excited to see the young talent on offer, especially from lightning winger Scott Cooper and Left back Graham Richardson winger. Striker Martin Seman also starred. 2-0 victories against Crystal Palace and Peterborough saw Stoke ‘A’ into the quarter finals where they narrowly lost 2-1 to a full strength Spurs team, Spurs scoring the winner after extra time.

The FA cup was not so productive, after struggling through on penalties against Luton in the 3rd round; Stoke then lost 1-0 in a very poor match against Middlesborough. The manager was not happy so the team set things right in the next league match against Newcastle, winning 4-0 and taking second place.

The first leg against Mallorca was a tight, scrappy affair. The players travelled there in high spirits, expecting an easy game. It was not to be, and a late Dean Bowditch equalizer was enough to get a 1-1 draw and the crucial away goal advantage.

The second leg was a much better game, Stoke were leading 2-1, with Mallorca pressing hard, when disaster struck in the 71st minute. Fabrice Grondin played a delicious through ball for Eero Peltonen to run on to. Ian Hughes rushes out to close down the angle, and forces Peltonen out even wider. The Finn then checks back onto his left foot, wrong footing Hughes before calmly slotting the ball past the Stoke Keeper’s scrambling right hand into the far corner of the net. 2-2 the final score line read. Mallorca had gone through on away goals, knocking Stoke out of the cup and giving them nothing to look forward to but the league, starting with a tough game against Chelsea next…(interestingly, two players from that Mallorca team go on to play for my team later on in my career – which is something I hadn’t realised before writing this)

The Chelsea game was a must win game, but many stoke fans were expecting a thrashing, with the players going out of the UEFA cup; they expected their heads to be down for a couple of weeks. One fan was quoted as saying ‘I’ve got a season ticket to the Brittania this year, but I may miss the next few games until they sort themselves out, then they’ll come back better than ever, fresher than ever, with only one thing o focus on.’ The manager however, was not going to wait a few games before sorting things out and did a very small amount of psyching up in the dressing room before the match. Those of you who have read the whole story from the first post are no doubt aware of the score line here, for those who haven’t or missed the link, please refer to the link on my first post to get a summary of the game.

The players continued their consistent form in to the end of the season, boosted especially by Simon Watson returning to fitness and top, top form. A 5-1 victory against Tottenham was revenge for the league cup quarter final and the players and fans, Chairman and manager were all delighted to finish the season in 2nd place in the English premiership, 11 points behind Arsenal and 1 in front of Newcastle. A certain pundit was not so impressed however, ‘Ah told ye, ye dunnae win anythin’ with kids, an’ they still ha’ nay won nothin’’ The manager was happy and in a press conference said this, ‘ I am very happy that we finished second in our second season in the premiership, we were disappointed with going out early on in the UEFA cup, but I feel that it really helped the lads dig in and really focus on finishing behind Arsenal, and qualifying automatically for the champions league’ When asked about whether they can challenge arsenal’s league dominance, he replied ‘they are far and away the most consistent side in England at the moment but I do feel that they will be entering a transition period soon, four or five of their players will soon be past their best and it is up to us to pounce on the chance, because certainly at the moment they are probably not beatable over a season.’ Many of the newer ‘top flight’ Stoke fans were disgruntled with their managers opinion but the die hards were content, remembering where their team was only a few years ago and witnessing the complete transformation of the club.

The chairman’s end of season statement was slightly later than usual, due to him entertaining a few high profile players on a yacht loaned to him by a Russian Billionaire… ‘I am delighted by the fantastic work and continued progress of everyone at the club. We have achieved yet another hurdle on the path to greatness. We are firmly established as a top premiership team, and a good run in the champions’ league next season will give the players and everyone involved with the club the extra boost and experience, not to mention money, that the club needs to fulfil its ambitions. The premiership title is now a four year plan and if things keep improving as they are, we will have another trophy to pair with our famous FA cup trophy in our mostly bare trophy cabinet.’

With bookies and most pundits finally accepting Stoke as a force to be reckoned with, their thoughts turn to the upcoming European championships and the inevitable departure of England manager Paul Jewell and who will replace him, it all depends on successful seasons in 2015/2016….

2nd W19 D11 L8 F82 A53 pts68

Players performances

Watson p35 G31 Ast 10 MoM 12 Avr 7.66

Bowditch p41 G27 Ast16 MoM 6 Avrr 7.37 fans player of the year...again!

Moseley 10 assists

Tacio Avr 7.37

Champions league

Schalke 1-0 Chelsea

[Simon the snail]

Huge apologies to all the Stoke fans out there. Please mentally replace 'the cobblers' with 'the potters' and forgive my Stoke city ignorance.

[Simon the snail]

Seaon Summary 2015/2016

After ending the season on such a high last year, it was going to be very difficult to improve upon the previous years effort this time around.

In an effort to establish Stoke city as a top team for decades, the manager decided to spend money on youth - starting with improving the training facilities to world class standard and then stealing five youngsters from various clubs. Central midfielder Lee Abbott was bought from Nottingham forest for 265k, right back Tim Robinson from Wigan for 375k (both players having played a number of first team game for their championship clubs last season despite being 15 and 16 years old.) Spanish defensive triplet Navarro, Ramos and Ruiz were also brought in on frees which upset a few fans who wanted and expected their club to maintain a strong English base.

The manager then looked to strengthen the team for the short term. Bruno Mezenga, a brazilian forward joined Stoke from Paris on a free, having agreed a deal in February. Jay McEveley was bought for 4m to add depth to the defence and the manager gambled on 20 year old Dm/AMC Gary Day from Luton where he had had a fantastic season the previous year in the championship.

Meanwhile the manager had been even more busy getting rid of players - which took many fans by surprise and some began to question their clubs ambitions. esposoto was shipped off on a free to Plymouth whilst aging favourite Paul Gallagher was given to Inverness to end his career. Andres D'Alessandro was also released to lower the wage bill. Asa Hall was sold to Leicester for 825k and unsettled Rossi Jarvis was a 2.1m aquisition for Man city. Young striker Martin Seman was sold to Club Brugge for a massive profit of 3.2m and promising keeper Petri Vaha-Pesola was sold to Chelsea for 3.3m. Then the biggest shock yet came. The fans were scocked, surprised and amazed when they turned their sunday papers to the back page to find that Francisco Javier Lopez, the man who scored 4 goals versus Shakhtar the previous season had been offloaded! Stuttgart had apparently gotten themselves a bargain! 4.5 million was still a club record sale, however. With a profit of almost 14 million, many fans were distraught, others, the cleverer ones were wondering who the manager had spotted, to sell 5 players to raise transfer funds for. He must be pretty amazing, they reasoned - for our manager wouldn't take a massive gamble...would he? A week passed and Stoke city had been very quiet on the transfer front, when slowly, news began to leak out of the Brittania stadium and into tabloid gossip columns. Apparently Long time Stoke target Cees Janssen had had a row with his Osasuna coach and was being allowed to leave for in the region of 18 million pounds. Sure enough, very soon after, the player was travelling to England for a medical and was a few says later officially photographed holding up a red number 23 shirt standing next to a beaming Stoke city manager. For an as yet unproven player (think Dirk Kuyt in real life), 15 million pounds was a lot of money and Stoke fans were very anxious to see how their record signing fared up against the best defences in the premiership.

The league season started relatively well for Stoke, featuring a 5-3 victory versus Leeds and a 4-1 win against Aston Villa. The only thing that marred the early season was a string of injuries from star striker Simon Watson - from pulled hamstrings to fractured cheekbones.

Stoke did not bother with the league cup or FA cup, putting youth teams out in both cases, and promptly losing 1-0 to Villa and 3-1 to Leeds. The manager was much more interested in the two biggest prizes in football, the champions league, and league. Although the league looked almost out of sight already with a Jermain Defoe led Arsenal streaking clear at the top.

Stoke were drawn with Rangers, Inter and Shakhtar in their group, strating with a fixture versus Scottish rivals Rangers. They proved no match for the mighty (yet Simon Watsonless) Stoke and were promptly thrashed 3-0 with goals from five times fans player of the year Dean Bowditch (2) and 1 from substitute Emil Samuelsson to kick off Stoke's first ever Champions league campaign. They then travelled to Inter Milans San Siro stadium. After getting the Inter players autographs, Stoke went 2-0 down. A converted penalty from newly establised first team player Gary Day forced Inter to score another to stay safe. Simon Watson came on for the last quarter of an hour and got one back for Stoke but Inter were able to hang on to the victory. In the third champions league game, Shakhtar came to town, again. With a full strength side, Stoke were able to finally start with the promising partnership of Watson and Janssen up front and, predictably they both scored in their teams 2-0 victory. In the return leg, Simon Watson was again injured, and what made matters worse was that Dean Bowditch was carried off to a Ukrainian hospital after only 3 minutes. What made matters better was that Janssen scored his first hat-trick for the potters (not the cobblers!!) in a convincing 5-2 victory with Day and Markus Kinnunen scoring the other two. The scoreline was repeated in the next game against Rangers, where Mezenga got two, Bowditch one, right back Greg Halford one, and young right winger Scott Cooper one. With qualification secured, Stoke had a chance to push Inter into the UEFA cup when the Milan club travelled to the Brittania. Not bothering with autographs this time, the manager was extremely satisfied with a marvellous 2-1 victory, including a fantastic individual goal from Simon Watson ( picking the ball up just past the half way line, dribbling past the two central midfielders before peeling off left, taking the ball round the outside of the right back, reaching the by-line and triking the ball with the outside of his foot so that it curled past the keeper, into the far post and in.) and Bruno Mezenga profiting from a fantastic Moseley cross. Stoke were in the Knockout stages as winners of their group!!

As the transfer window opened, some disturbing rumours were coming out of the Brittania stadium. With one and a half years left on his contract, Stoke captain Josef Broz was refusing to sign a new one, believing that Stoke did not have the resources. A number of clubs became interested and it seemed as if Stoke were about to lose their most influential player and arguably one of the best left backs in the world at that current time. When an 8.25m bid from Roma came in, the offer was accepted and Stoke captain Josef Broz walked out of the Brittania stadium for the last time, got in a parked taxi and was whisked off to Rome. Stoke also sold Markus Kinnunen to Newcastle for 5.5m after he had not scored since the 5-2 victory against shakhtar. With days running out before the window closed, Stoke did not have a proven left back to continue their champions league campaign and keep them in the top four in the league. Whats more a new captain had to be chosen.

As the transfer window drew to a close, neither of these things had happened and teenage left back Graham Richardson had a huge half of a season in front of him.

With the manager claiming that Richardson was the reason he sold Broz, the next game against Newcastle was a sell out, with fans turning up in their thousands to take their first good look at this supposed teenage senstaion. When their team trudged off the pitch at the final whistle having conceded four goals and only scoring two, Stoke fans were not entirely optimistic about the rest of the season. One fan was quoted as saying, 'we are really going to miss Broz out there, not only are we lacking defensive cover on the left but we also are suddenly a team without leadership. Hopefully we can hang onto a champions league place but to be honest I expect to be playing in the UEFA cup next season.'

With the first leg of the champions league knockout round against Deportivo looming, the Stoke players were hard at work learning how to defend. They didn't learn quick enough, though and lost 3-2 with goals coming from Tacio and Morrisson. Luckily they were playing away from home and thus only needed to win 1-0 at the Brittania to go through on away goals.

Veteran defender Aaron Mokoena was named as the new captain and Stoes performances began to pick up again in the league. They were occupying third place but about 10 points behind Spurs in second place. Their only hope of a trophy this season lay in the Champions league - and that task was surely impossible for a small club like Stoke. They made it through to the quarter finals though, with a fantastic 4-0 victory in the home leg against Deportivo. Janssen and Bowditch both scoring two. With one of the easier draws in the quarters - a tie against Sevilla, the Stoke team were optimistic about reaching the last four. Graham Richardson had settled down and was producing some consistent, yet not mindblowing, or even Broz standard performances.

Sevilla travelled to England for the first leg and it was them with the away goal at the end of the game. Gary Day and Cees janssen did ensure that Stoke travelled to Spain with the advantage however. Stoke now faced their biggest task yet - they had to keep a clean sheet! Either that or set Simon Watson/Cees Janssen amongst them and win win by a ridiculous margin. But this is the Champions league quarter final! The best eight clubs in Europe! Sevilla realized Stokes plan and swiftly defended deep and man marked Watson, so the stoke strike force was nullified. So they scored from midfield instead. Moseley and Tacio putting their team into the semi finals after keeping a rare clean sheet as well.

A proper giant of a team faced Stoke in the semi's. The players stepped off the plane to the sound of a loudspeaker 'Hallo Stoke City. Wilkommen nach Munchen' German giants Bayern Munich were the opponents, and certain pundits were predicting a one way game, 'Look a' them, they're wee keds. Ah cannae see any way tha' they woon't come away withoot a thraashing. The Germans are too experienced.'

Bayern took the lead early on through Neumann and defended doggedly through ninety minutes. Cees Janssen scored in the ninety first. With a vital away goal to take back to Stoke, excitement and expectation was rising. The whole country had become Stoke city supporters. With that support spearing the team on, plus a woefully poor Munich side, the potters cruised into the final, 4-0, with Watson and Morrisson both getting a brace.

And in the final, Stoke face the the team from the San Siro on neutral ground, in the Lerkendal stadium, Trondheim. However, this team from the San Siro is the real deal, the red team, AC Milan.

Prior to this match Stoke had finished off their season in style, securing 3rd place with a 5-1 victory over Chelsea followed by a 6-0 one against Newcastle, so the players were on form, but tired.

The match began and Milan took it by the scruff off the neck and held it there. The Italian clubs superior class was easy to see, mastering the midfield with ease, their players dictated the play creating chance after chance after chance, only to be denied time after time after time by specialist champion's league keeper David Button. Thanks to him Stoke managed to reach half time at 0-0 where the manager had to make some tactical changes. Stoke began the second half playing the same way but slightly narrower, their game plan was to play on the counter attack and get the ball to Simon Watson ASAP. Stoke got their first shot on target in the 53rd mnute. The game became slightly more even, but Milan still had more possession. Then stokes second shot on target happened in the 78th minute, it was pushed behind for a corner. With the game descending to inevitable extra time this could well be Stokes ast chance to score in normal time. James Morrisson crossed it from the right, aiming for Gary Day on the penalty spot, Day leapt high, met the ball with his head, and the ball went flying towards the bottom left corner! Stoke had a third shot on target! But no goal. the keeper saw the header early and got down well to his left to save...but he fumbled it, the ball bounced loosely in the box for less than a second before an inrushing boot connected. As the player wheeled away, all the TV cameras saw was '9 Watson' on the players back before he was buried under a scrum of his own players. Stoke had 10 minutes to hold on in order to win the greatest club prize of all. They did. the whole of England was in ecstacy. as Aaron Mokoena lifted the cup nobody doubted for one moment that this team would win this again next year, and the league, and the world cup...then they calmed down.

The chairman released a statement the same night praising the team and manager, 'This has been the most fantastic end to a season I have ever experienced as chairman. I am extremely proud of the players and manager. We are satisfied with the third place in the league but hope to challenge Arsenal for the title next year. We have established ourselves as one of the greatest teams in Europe and it is my dream that we can turn this one success into the beginning of a new, successful era for Stoke football club. More of the same next year please.'

3rd W18 D10 L10 F82 A52 pts64

Watson p42 G22 Ast11 Avr7.4

Janssen p47 G30 Ast9 Avr 7.26

Day p50 G13 Ast8 MoM7 Avr 7.52

Bowditch wins fans player of the year for the sixth time running.

The champions league success meant that 6 Stoke players wer included in the England sqaud for the European Championships, Button (GK), Hughes(GK), Moseley (MLC), Watson (ST), Bowditch (ST) and Day (Dm,AMC). england lost to sweden 3-2 after extra time in the quarter finals and Sweden lost 1-0 to Holland in the final.

Arsenal won the premiership with 81 points, Tottenham were second with 75.

England needed a new manager...