EPL Challenge (The Ultimate Premier League Experience)

EPL Challenge (The Ultimate Premier League Experience) Game Thread

Welcome to the Update thread for EPL Challenge.

Good news y'all. Yes, we're back with some familiar names and huge egos for the latest installment of our series of games in Football Manager 2006. It's time once again for the EPL gents to put their hard earned managerial reputations (ok, some easy lost ones there too eh, Mark? ) on the line and inspire their teams into a era filled with glory and plentiful shiny trophies. Failing that, you can always jump ship to Chelsea if Roman comes calling.

We'll be aiming to live up to previous games and therefore we anticipate thrills and spills, banter and slagging, trophies and sackings aplenty, in-depth manager interviews and of course some literally brilliant nights of virtual football.

The important information:

The Game:

The arena is the English Premiership. All current European qualified Clubs (including inter-toto) are disqualified at the outset of the game. Therefore, Spurs were up for grabs once again.

The Game Times:

Tuesday 7:30 - 10:30pm; Thursday 7:30 - 10:30pm; Sunday 7:30 - 10:30pm

The Rules (A Must Read):

The Rules (Please see a few modifications there chaps.)

The Application Form:

Applications

(We currently have 10 players and may not accept any more but feel free to register an interest or join in the banter on the EPL Challenge Forum).

EPL Challenge Gaffers FM2006

Sam Bouchard - Aston Villa

Niall Murphy - Birmingham City

Andy Nilsen - Blackburn Rovers

Dave Williams - Charlton Athletic

Mark D'Ardenne - Fulham

Rick Boult - Manchester City

David Pagi - Tottenham Hotspur

Richard Liggins - West Bromwich Albion

Danny King - West Ham United

Ben Jackson - Wigan Athletic

Some tough tasks there at the onset, I'm anticipating a few strugglers in the first season and given my own form on the demo, I'm expecting Birmingham to be one of them....

Game start date is currently patch dependent as there are match engine changes involved. This is also useful as it gives Pagi time to write an introductory report.

With all the sincerity I can muster, I bid my opponents good luck but most importantly lots of defeats over the next year or so.

EPL Challenge (The Ultimate Premier League Experience) Game Thread

Welcome to the Update thread for EPL Challenge.

Good news y'all. Yes, we're back with some familiar names and huge egos for the latest installment of our series of games in Football Manager 2006. It's time once again for the EPL gents to put their hard earned managerial reputations (ok, some easy lost ones there too eh, Mark? ) on the line and inspire their teams into a era filled with glory and plentiful shiny trophies. Failing that, you can always jump ship to Chelsea if Roman comes calling.

We'll be aiming to live up to previous games and therefore we anticipate thrills and spills, banter and slagging, trophies and sackings aplenty, in-depth manager interviews and of course some literally brilliant nights of virtual football.

The important information:

The Game:

The arena is the English Premiership. All current European qualified Clubs (including inter-toto) are disqualified at the outset of the game. Therefore, Spurs were up for grabs once again.

The Game Times:

Tuesday 7:30 - 10:30pm; Thursday 7:30 - 10:30pm; Sunday 7:30 - 10:30pm

The Rules (A Must Read):

The Rules (Please see a few modifications there chaps.)

The Application Form:

Applications

(We currently have 10 players and may not accept any more but feel free to register an interest or join in the banter on the EPL Challenge Forum).

EPL Challenge Gaffers FM2006

Sam Bouchard - Aston Villa

Niall Murphy - Birmingham City

Andy Nilsen - Blackburn Rovers

Dave Williams - Charlton Athletic

Mark D'Ardenne - Fulham

Rick Boult - Manchester City

David Pagi - Tottenham Hotspur

Richard Liggins - West Bromwich Albion

Danny King - West Ham United

Ben Jackson - Wigan Athletic

Some tough tasks there at the onset, I'm anticipating a few strugglers in the first season and given my own form on the demo, I'm expecting Birmingham to be one of them....

Game start date is currently patch dependent as there are match engine changes involved. This is also useful as it gives Pagi time to write an introductory report.

With all the sincerity I can muster, I bid my opponents good luck but most importantly lots of defeats over the next year or so.

King appointed West Ham manager

West Ham has confirmed that Danny King has been appointed manager.

He has been handed the task of following in Alan Pardew footsteps.

The 28-year-old Englishman has been given the Upton Park after his predecessor was shown the door following there promotion winning season.

King, who has quit his post at Chelsea to accept West Ham chairman Terence Brown offer, will take over immediate effect.

Sky Sports can confirm Danny King leaves Chelsea today to take up the position of team manager of West Ham Utd.

I have been in talks with West Ham over the weekend, will take up his new post from today onward.

King' appointment came as a surprise after days of speculation which has thrown the names of Trevor Booking to the top of the pile and the donkey Nilsen was also mentioned as an also ran.

The Chelsea boss had been mentioned as a candidate but was thought that he would never leave a team like Chelsea to taken on a small job within the premiership.

Newspaper reports revelation yesterday that Andy Nilsen had held talks with the hammers but after only providing 1 trophy in 8 years at Fratton Park the West Ham board wanted to go with a proven manager who wouldn’t sell off the whole team within a couple of seasons.

King said:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">It has always been a dream of mine to one day manage West Ham Utd having only been born a stone throw away from the club in Newham hospital. I have a 5 year plan for this club that will hopefully result in regularly European club football. The first part of this plan will be avoid relegation and bring in some good young players who will be able to take the club forward. It’s true I could have stayed at Chelsea and had a easy life buying the title year after year but the lure of West Ham was too good to turn down. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Player guide

Roy Carroll

West Ham United completed the signing of goalkeeper Roy Carroll from Manchester United in June 2004.

Carroll had joined United three years earlier from Wigan Athletic. Various injuries to Barthez gave Carroll a number of spells in the first-team at Old Trafford, and he rarely let them down. There were even calls for him to stay as first choice, due to the erratic form of the Frenchman.

In 2002/03, he started and finished the season in goal for United, covering for Barthez's injury in August, and replacing him in April and May after poor performances against Real Madrid. However, with the arrival of Tim Howard, Carroll found himself sitting on the bench again the following season, apart from a brief run in the team in 2004.

In 2004/05 he was first choice for most of the season after some mistakes by Howard. He was mostly solid, but made some high profile and costly errors, particularly against AC Milan in the Champions League. He was also fortunate when he dropped a long-range shot from Pedro Mendes over the goal-line, as the officials wrongly gave no goal.

However, these mistakes plus Carroll's unwillingness to sign a new contract led to him leaving Old Trafford in May 2005, and a month later he joined West Ham.

My view: I may hate Carroll in real life after cheating Spurs out of 3 points by conning the ref and linesman but Carroll showed what a good goal keeper he was on our last game playing well for both Fulham and Arsenal. Carroll will be my number one choice for the start of the season.

Thomas Repka

Former Fiorentina defender Thomas Repka overcame initial difficulties at Upton Park to settle down well into the team in his first full season, proving an excellent defender and showing fans his international class.

Repka was initially reluctant to leave Florence, citing his settled family as the reason. But once the cash strapped club could no longer afford to pay his wages, he soon changed his mind and made his £5.5 million switch to the Barclaycard Premiership. The Czech Republic international arrived in East London with a reputation as an uncompromising defender and was soon living up to his name after picking up a red card on his debut - another one was to follow within a few matches.

Nevertheless, Repka soon settled into the side and established himself as one of Glenn Roeder's most consistent defenders as West Ham entered their hugely successful second half of the season. He is now a key part of Roeder's plans for the future.

My view: This was one of the many reasons why Roeder was sacked imo paying 5.5 million for this load of crap. Thomas will start as first choice right back until I can bring someone better in. Seemed to give away a lot of penalties in the demo

Anton Ferdinand

When your older brother is the world's most expensive defender it must be difficult to avoid the inevitable comparisons, but young Anton Ferdinand is determined to step out of Rio's shadow and carve a place for himself in the Barclays Premiership.

Glenn Roeder offered Ferdinand junior a professional contract at the age of 17, the same week in which his older brother completed his £30million move to Manchester United.

After seeing huge improvements in his game over the previous six months, Roeder felt it was time for Anton to make the step up to professional level and rewarded him with a three-year deal.

Ferdinand is another product of West Ham's celebrated youth academy and can play centre-back or right-back. He broke into the team following their relegation from the top flight and established himself under Alan Pardew in 2004/05.

My view: Anton can be one for the future as long as he managed right. Can be make the old mistake now and then but hoping he will learn by his mistake with age and under my management.

Danny Gabbidon

Danny Gabbidon began his career at West Bromwich Albion before joining Cardiff City in September 2000. He quickly established himself as a mainstay at Ninian Park and made his Wales debut in March 2002. He made 217 appearances for the Bluebirds before leaving in July to join Barclays Premiership new-boys West Ham United alongside team-mate James Collins.

My view: Well he has a good first name and that’s a start . Danny will be able to make the spot his in the team if he plays like he did in the demo.

Paul Konchesky

A left-sided defender, Paul Konchesky holds the honour of being the youngest player ever to make a Charlton Athletic first-team appearance when playing against Oxford United during the 1997/98 season when only 16 years 93 days old.

In 2001/02, Konchesky made 41 appearances, scoring 2 goals for Charlton. He also made his England Under 21s debut in February 2002.

He started the 2002/03 season in explosive form, scoring against Chelsea before being controversially sent off. He then struggled to hold down a regular place in the Addicks team, despite some impressive performances, and grew frustrated with not being allowed to play left-back.

In the summer of 2003, he handed in a transfer request, saying that he needed to get regular first team football in his favoured position to help him push his way into the England squad.

Then on the final day of the summer transfer window, September 1 2003, he moved to Tottenham on an initial one-month loan deal, with Spurs defender Chris Perry moving to the Valley for a month. Both players were keen to make the move more permanent, but the managerial situation at Spurs and the closed transfer window make that a difficult possibility.

Perry's deal was made permanent after a few months, leaving Konchesky hoping that his could be too, though he had to make do with the loan being further extended in December 2003. However he was recalled just before Christmas as Charlton's injury problems meant Alan Curbishley needed him as cover.

He featured in almost every single one of the Addicks' remaining games of the season, and despite being linked with a move away from The Valley, Alan Curbishley wanted to hang on to the defender, take him off the transfer list and offer him a new deal.

However, it was not until February 2005 that he was finally taken off the list. His 2004/05 season saw him play 31 games and score once, in Charlton's 4-0 victory against Norwich at The Valley.

Despite all that, in July 2005, he left the Addicks to join newly-promoted West Ham United on a long-term deal.

My view: Paul will be a solid left back for my team and I’m pleased to have him in the team. Played well in the demo without ever really excelling

Matty Etherinton

Matty Etherinton is a rare breed of Englishman. A good young player who is naturally left-footed. He signed from Peterborough together with midfielder Simon Davies in January 2000.

The 19-year-old made his debut for Tottenham against Liverpool at Anfield in April 2000 before making his full debut at Old Trafford against Manchester United. He has featured regularly as a substitute for the seniors and fulfilled his pre-season ambition of staying in and around the first team scene.

Etherington finally felt he had made his first team mark when he scored his first senior goal for the club against Bolton Wanderers in the FA Cup fourth round tie at the Lane in February 2002.

It was a culmination of events for the young winger, who had only weeks before returned from a two-month loan spell at First Division Bradford City. He certainly made an impression at Valley Parade and was virtually ever-present in the first team 16 after returning. He enjoyed short spells in the starting X1 when Christian Ziege was missing and continued to progress under the Spurs coaching staff.

In the 2002/03 campaign Etherington played got the first Spurs' goal of the season against Everton and then went on to play in 25 more games. He continued to impress and although his first team opportunities were been restricted in the past, he began to impress all with his skill and determination down then left flank.

The 2003/04 campaign was billed as his biggest season yet but he was ushered out of White Hart Lane to join West Ham as part of the £3.5million deal that took Freddie Kanoute away from Upton Park. He has been a regular for the Hammers ever since and played a key role in their promotion in 2004/05.

My view: An old spurs player which again is a good start . In the last few CM/FM I have played him he is one moody git always wanting to move to bigger club so If a good offer came in I might be tempted to sell. Other than that he is a good wing man for West Ham and I know he can bang in a few goals along the way.

Hayden Mullins

Hayden Mullins became Alan Pardew's first new signing when he arrived on loan from Crystal Palace in October 2003. He had been at Selhurst Park since signing on as a trainee in 1996 and played over 200 games for Palace.

He impressed Pardew enough to earn a permanent move and has been a regular in the West Ham side since, playing an important part in their promotion campaign.

My view: Hayden was one of my best player on the gold demo doing a great job holding the midfield together. Mullins is class player who will be vital in my bid to stay up this season in the premiership.

Yossi Benayoun

West Ham manager Alan Pardew completed the signing of Racing Santander midfielder Yossi Benayoun in July 2005.

The 25-year-old Israeli international signed a four-year deal with the Hammers after completing his £2.5million switch to the Barclays Premiership new boys.

Benayoun started with career with Hapoel Beer Sheva, after two years at the Ajax Academy. He moved on to Maccabi Haifa, where he became a real star of the Israeli league, before being sold to Santander in 2003.

My view: Starman This was one of the main reason why I picked West Ham Utd for FM. This guy has it all passing, darting runs and knows how to put the ball in the back of the net. I will need Benayoun firing on all cylinders to stay up this season.

Nigel Reo-Coker

Nigel Reo-Coker came through the ranks at Wimbledon, making his debut in April 2002 and becoming a regular in the following season, scoring twice.

After an impressive first half of the 2003/04 season for the troubled Dons, he signed for West Ham. He quickly became a regular member of Alan Pardew's first team and scored three times to help them win promotion in 2004/05 through the play-offs.

My view: Reo-Coker will be my engine in midfield often doing the vital job in the team without the glory. Also a young man so I’m hoping his all round game will improve given time.

Teddy Sherinham

Born in Walthamstow, Teddy Sherinham started his career with Millwall as an apprentice and worked his way through the club junior sides before making his first team debut in January 1984 against Bournemouth.

After many years at the Den, Nottingham Forest moved in, paying £2m for his services but although he scored goals for the club he never really settled and 13 months later was back in London - moving to Tottenham.

The goals started to flow again and by the end of the 1992/93 Sheringham had rattled in 29 to become the Premiership's "Golden Boot" winner. Though his partnership with Jurgen Klinsmann was perhaps more memorable.

At international level Teddy formed another excellent partnership with Alan Shearer, particularly during Euro 96, when he was once more under Terry Venables, his manager at Tottenham.

When Sheringham moved to Man United he was initially given the unenviable task of filling Eric Cantona's boots, and not surprisingly he struggled. After a period in the wilderness Teddy came back to confound his critics during the 1998/99 run-in. After coming into the team which won the Premiership, he came off the bench in the FA Cup Final to play a key role in winning that trophy. Amazingly he came off the bench again in the Champion's League Final to alter the course of the game, and United's history, by scoring the equaliser and setting up the winner. From having seen no silverware in his long career, he picked up the game's three most valued trophies within a few weeks.

However, at the end of his contract in May 2001, he moved back to White Hart Lane and became a hero once again for the Spurs fans who had jeered him as a United player.

After two successful seasons at Spurs, his contract came to an end and it seemed Teddy Sheringham no longer featured in Glenn Hoddle's plans.

The newly-promoted Portsmouth were quick to sign the experienced striker on a free transfer, and he immediately became a hit at Fratton Park. In his first four appearances he scored four goals - including a his first hat-trick in three years.

However, as the season wore on, Sheringham was less involved at Pompey and with Aiyegbeni Yakubu and Lomana LuaLua forming an impressive partnership up front, it was announced in May 2004 that the England veteran would be moving on again in the summer. West Ham boss Alan Pardew moved quickly to secure the services of the veteran striker, who had been linked with moves to the MLS, Qatar and Coventry City.

It turned out to be a great decision as he scored 20 goals to help the Hammers win promotion through the play-offs and earned himself the Powerade Championship Player of the Year award. He will be looking forward to what could be his swansong season in the Barclays Premiership.

My view: What more could be said about Teddy this man has been there and done it. I only wish he was 15 years younger as being 39 years old in the premiership will take it toll on one of the games truly great legends. I will be looking to bring in another forward to help ease the pressure on Teddy but hopefully he will set up some vital goals for my team when he plays.

Marlon Harewood

Marlon Harewood is a graduate of the Nottingham Forest youth system who spent time on loan at Ipswich in 1999 prior to breaking into the Forest side on a regular basis.

He played almost 200 times for them before moving to West Ham in November 2003 for £500,000. Since then he has been a regular for the Hammers, scoring 22 goals in their 2004/05 promotion campaign.

My view: Again another player who played well for me in the demo. Marlon will be my main source of goals in the premiership and if he struggles to get them then in will be a long hard season for West Ham.

What more can be said other than bring on the Sam, Niall, Slim Dave, Frenchman, EPL Legend Rick , Pagi, Ligs, ET and those 6 easy points that is the Goat.

Also revenge will be on the cards for my Carling cup defeats at the hands of Niall and Rick this time around.

Murphy rides into the second city to usurp the Villa

So I've got the Birmingham (cough, spit, look angry) job after Stevie Bruce was given one broken nose too many when Karen Brady slapped him about the chops with her handbag. Brady was muttering something about spending a lot of money and not producing the desired results, the usual palava. Bruce was swiftly out the door and a new era is about to begin. Well, either that or Birmingham were the last decent side left after the vultures had swooped on their favoured sides while the AWOL Murphy was getting used to married life. All part of a cunning plan to send me to Sunderland but heh guys, you failed. Miserably

I did hear though on the grapevine that Andy Nilsen was turned down for the job for only winning one trophy in eight years at Portsmouth. Apparently Brady thought that since O'Leary was doing a decent job down at the Villa, the best course of action was to bring in another Oirishman instead of a failed Englishman. I can see the sense in that. Therefore, here I am. An Evertonian no more.

In accepting the job I was aware of two things.

My first task will be to try and overcome the language barrier. I'm already booked in for thrice weekly sessions of "An idiots guide Brummie" in the local college. This will also provide a handy excuse when things inevitably go wrong on the pitch. But heh, I took a wee spin down "Broad Street" and oh my God but there were loads of bars, perfect for an Irishman to relax and contemplate matters relating to football. Unfortunatley, my first evening out on the town was interupped by a young drunk hooligan, who kept abusing me by calling me "Beaky". Such arrogance.

I had no idea what the hell he was on about but I was amused to later learn that the hooligan was none other than my new rival down at West Brom, Richard Liggins, who clearly has an eye for the bottle and not football players. Well with him and rumours of the arrival of mad Manc Sam Bouchard at the Villa, the midlands derbies should be interesting this season.

Secondly, a quick bit of research before accepting the job discovered a few facts about the club I now represent. They have won sod all in their history bar the 1991 Leyland Daf Trophy but apparently did reach a Fairs Cup Final back in the 50s. I am also following in the footsteps of previous "greats" such as Gerry Pendry, Terry Cooper (no not the comedian, but Brum were a joke) Willie Bell and Fred Goodwin. Therefore any success here will make me an instant managerial legend at the club and more successful than Danny King.

Expectations for season one are realistic. I don't rate the squad that highly and they lack strength in depth. There are some good players in the team, the obvious ones being Upson and Forssell. However, weaknesses have been spotted and it's going to take cash to cover all those spots. Realistically though, on paper the club will be aiming for a spot around the top 10 and anything above that will be considered progress. I'll just rely on Heskey to batter the sh1te out of everyone else's defenders.

So looking forward to renewing my long standing rivalry with Nilsen, King, Pagi etc in the near future. Fingers crossed for Frenchie's Fulham at St Andrews on the opening day for a morale boosting easy three points.

Bring it on.

The Great One Has Arrived

After the hasty departure of Paul Jewell after a breach of club policy, Dave Whelan has moved quickly to bring

in a manager of proven experience. New manager Ben Jackson has previously managed Middlesbrough, Birmingham City

and a short spell at Liverpool.

Jackson won the UEFA Cup with Birmingham along with reaching the UEFA Cup finals on two other occasions, although sadly he couldn't add more trophies to his CV.

A clearly delighted Jackson had this to say -

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">I'm delighted to have been given a great opportunity at Wigan and have promised Mr Whelan that I'll be doing my best to take this club forward and give the fans something to really cheer about. Mr Whelan has told me that i'll have a substantial transfer budget and will allow me some flexibility with the wage bill too. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

But off the record, the manager had plenty to say about some of the other managers in the Premiership -

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">I've never had much time for the Birmingham manager Murphy who's constantly complaining about the lack of funds and how he needs to vastly improve the squad and as for the West Ham manager King, don't get me started . He bought success at Chelsea and won't know where to start when he'll have next to nothing to spend .

Then there's Pagi at Spurs who fluked his way to beating me in the UEFA Cup Final when I managed Birmingham but his luck will run out when he brings his team to our ground.

There's also Frenchy at Fulham who'll be gone by Christmas after ruining another club and Williams who's marginally better than Frenchy although that's not exactly a compliment . There's also Rick at Man City who'll probably not turn up for work, as he'll probably be sprawled on the floor, out of his head in some back street club in Manchester.

Goat at Blackburn isn't much better, as he's a dirty old man who hankers after 14 year old girls (Allegedly!!! ). That just leaves Sam managing Villa. who speaks a good game but sadly doesn't manage one and also there's Ligs at West Brom who's a bit of a mystery to me but considering the state he left Boro in when I joined them, West Broms fans better start praying now. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Squad Overview

Goalkeeper

Gary Walsh - GK

John Filan - GK

Mike Pollitt - GK

With a combined age of 105, there'll be no lack of experience in the goalkeeping department. I'll still be trying to bring in a good younger keeper in the summer to be the number one goalkeeper for the club after we manage to retain our status in the Premiership hopefully.

Mike Pollitt is the best of the three goalkeepers, due to his great reflexes and shot stopping ability.

Defence

Arjan De Zeeuw - SW/D C

David Wright - D RC/DM

Emerson Thome - D C

Leighton Baines - D/WB L

Matt Jackson - D RC

Pascal Chimbonda - DR

Ryan Taylor D/WB/M R

Stephane Henchoz - D RC

Stephen McMillan - D/wB L

A good mix of youth and experience in the defence, althought a lack of pace in central defence could be a problem. I'll be looking to add at least one central defender to the squad with an abundance of pace to compensate for the problem.

The left back Leighton Baines looks very good and could be a future England player if he continues to progress the way he has been.

Midfield

Alan Mahon - AM LC

Damian Francis - M C

Gary Teale - AM R

Graham Kavanagh - DM

Josip Skoko - AM RLC

Jimmy Bullard - AM RC

Lee McCulloch - AML/ST

A good mix of youth and experience again in midfield, with plenty of players capable of keeping the ball on the ground and passing it around. There's also a willingness to work hard which will be an enormous help in the bid to stay up in the first season in the Premiership.

Graham Kavanagh is the pick of the bunch, with an ability to score long range goals and act as a effective barrier in front of the defence.

Attack

David Connolly - ST

Henri Camara - AM RC/F C

Jason Roberts - ST

There's pace to burn in the attack with Roberts and Camara and Connolly is capable of acting as a targetman, holding up the ball and bringing others into the game. I'll be looking to add another striker as I think we'll be lacking an out and out goalscorer to get us the 20+ goals we'll need if we want to have any chance of staying up.

Explosive striker Henri Camara is the best of the strikers, capable of running with the ball at great pace which is bound to scare many defenders this season.

Really looking forward to getting my Wigan managerial career underway and will be taking great pleasure in beating many of the EPL managers along the way .

All I can say is - BRING IT ON!!! .

D'Ardenne roles into Craven Cottage on particularly large wheel of Camenbert-Season ticket sales at Fulham plumet to record low

Yes it can be exclusively be revealed that Mark D'Ardenne has been tempted out of managerial retirement, at the ripe old age of 19, by promises from rival manager Niall Murphy of photos of his missus . D'Ardenne who had been working in a stage production of "deux baguettes, sans beurre mais avec du jambon" alongside Eric Cantona, had previously stated his desire to never return to management in england due to the racial intolerance and general malaise that is the english premiership. However he has answered AL Fayed' call due to longstanding manager Mo Illyas' decision to try for a place in the womens curling team at the next winter olympics, leaving him little time to steer fulham towards inevitable relegation.

The Fulham fans although not alltogether overjoyed with the appointment of the ingenious D'Ardenne, have found solace in the fact that relegation seems a certainty anyway, so D'Ardennes skills of offending fellow managers into selling there players should come to the fore in the championship. Also the chance of seeing D'Ardenne in conversation with Neil Warnock, after the historic "i spit on you" moment after a league cup 3rd round encounter, has the fans drooling. The prospect of some error riddled interviews,Ranieri-esque in there nature, in broken english, should provide some welcome comic relief to the fans during a difficult season!

The fans were however ecstatic to hear that living legend Eric Cantona will be accompanying D'Ardenne to Craven Cottage, taking the vacant assistant managers position, with the hope that he will provide a calming influence over the volatile D'Ardenne.

Rather than doing an extensive list of the players in my squad i will summise in a sentence or two...GK options are bloody awful with Batista providing promise for the future. defence is ok but could do with strengthening. Midfield is strongest part of my team but true to form expect ALL my good players to demand to leave . Strikerwise John has potential and the oafish McBride may get some goals with his mal-coordinated style...so in summary...championship here i come

At this point in time im expected to "have a dig at rival managers" but there is plenty of time for that in the comeing season, all i will say is Ben you look like/are ET, and Niall even though your team is vastly superior in every way(except equipped with a worse manager ) if i do manage to take even a point off you...HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Ireland are not going to the world cup

New man bounces into Baggies hotseat

West Bromwich Albion have announced that Bryan Robson has had his contract terminated with immediate effect, despite his heroics in keeping the club in the top flight last season. Replacing him is former Middlesbrough and Manchester United manager Richard Liggins, who has a good pedigree but has been out of the game for a few seasons. Can he pick up where he left off, or will he be following Murphy and D'Ardenne down to the Championship? Liggins had the following to say:

"MORNING! It's great to be back in management. It's going to be a long hard season, we could finish anywhere between 10th and 20th, but the aim is to stay in the division and build for the future. It's my hardest challenge to date but one I feel I'm ready for."

Robson has left the Baggies with a squad that epitomises mediocrity. On-loan sicknote Kirkland is the only shining light, and his fitness will be key to West Brom staying up. The one hope that the fans can cling onto is the fact that Villa, Birmingham, Blackburn, Fulham, West Ham and Wigan all have new managers of dubious talent, so there might be more teams worse than Albion over the course of the season. Let's hope so

Boing boing

Heart Opperation A True Success For Ellis

Doug Ellis was whisked into Hospital two weeks ago for immediate heart surgery after his tripple by-pass, put in 5 years ago, began to fail.

Ellis was taken through to Birmingham City Hospital where it was unfortunatly full to the brim, however it wasn't when Ellis was picked up from his home but unfortunatly during the 20 minute ride to the hospital the news had spread and hundreds of people swarmed the hospital in search of a whole range of aids from staff. Some wanted the flu jab, others claimed broken bones whilst people were aparently going in with tomato sauce all over their shirts trying to play it off as blood just so that they could get in.

The madness at the hospital surely wasn't caused by the news of Ellis heading their way, and the abundance of Aston Villa shirts on the people must surely be a coinsidence....but the 'we want Ellis out' chants could've tipped any jury over as to what the cause was.

As Ellis was rushed through the hospital the staff attempted to find a room to perform the surgery, but it just wasn't possible. The only free bit of space was in the relatives room where only one man was sitting in the corner looking quite sad. The crew rushed Ellis in and tried to remove pieces of equipment from other rooms which weren't in use to place on the 80 year old. It was a right kerfuffle and in the end a whole host of odd's and sods were brought in to try and help the surgeons. Jumpers were being unsown by staff insearch of material for stitching, a needle was removed from the turntable in reception, a bedpan was used as a pillow for the patent whilst perhaps the worst bodge of the lot was a lie detector that was used as a heart monitor!

As nurses stripped Ellis of his clothes, pieces of paper fell out of his pocket and span their way across the floor in the direction of the man in the corner. He carefully leant forward and picked up the pieces of paper, but didn't really pay much attention to it. Moments later, the bleeps were coming from the machine and all seemed to be under control with Ellis, then the man's Son walked through with his wife.

After a little while all three members sat down with a cup of tea quite oblivious to what was happening just a few feet away from them. The little boy took the pieces of paper from his dad's hand and began to write on them, copying something from a badge of a coat he saw on the side. The family then left the room and headed their way out of the hospital. As they turned from the exit the wind from the outside blew the pieces of paper from the boys hands back into the hospital and to the feet of the main doctor of the hospital, Doctor Bouchard. He picked up the paper and began reading the sheets carefully. Whilst reading he peered into the window in the door of the 'Relatives room' where Ellis was laying'.

He walked in and was informed of the situation before he looked at the equipment in use. He put the pieces of paper down on the lie detector and picked up a chart showing Doug's progress. After a short chat with other doctors he turned around to pick up the paper only to see the needle joult and go over it

Bouchard looked over the papers again and saw that the lines had replicated Ellis' signature to an absolute perfect match. He then went and picked up his jacket from the side which he left on a chair from earlier and left the room leaving the papers by the man's clothes.

AAAAAAAANYWAY.....today it turns out that Doctor Sam Bouchard has been hired as the new gaffer of Aston Villa Football Club. Ellis who is now recovering from his operation said that he couldn't remember if he'd signed the papers or not, but that it had definatly gone through his mind about getting rid of O'Leary and that he was set to give him his P45 that very evening. As for hiring Bouchard, he said that he must've seen something in him due to putting his name at the top of the sheet, filling out his details and then signing his own name perfectly at the bottom.

Bouchard who was quite baffled yet excited about his new job had spoken to Ellis on the ward after the news and agreed to take the club to 'dizzy heights' whilst taking personal care of the chairman if needed at any time. Ellis seemed more than happy with the result that was made...even if it was a somewhat dillusional one.

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Doug Ellis

The name Bouchard definatly rings bells to me, I'm sure i've had a recent dream about the lad or at least his name. I'm not saying i'm gay byu having dreams about a gorgeous male doctor.....errm....I mean he's a nice lookin chap who'll definatly boost the club in one form or another....oh just shut up...he's got the job and he's my first choice.....for a manager anyway - not anything else...got it! </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Sam Bouchard

Well, of course i'm flattered to be involved with Aston Villa FC, i'm involved with new people and new events on a daily basis, although i still need a lot of patients.....*waits for laughs*.....................

........................................................................

........................................................................

...............*gets them*....anyway! I'm delighted to be here, rave on to Villa Park, bring back the trophy's i say. I can work miracles, it's proven already after i removed that toilet duck from the man's bladder, and put it back in his toilet for him. It's something i can do in the medical profession and I aim to do so in the footballing profession.

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

So.....Dr Sam Bouchard Monday, Manager Sam Bouchard the next...

Spurs prays are answered

Well it's what the fan's wanted, and who can argue with the fans? They demanded the lengendary Pagi be reinstated as the Spurs manager and thats exactly what has materialised. Jol was sensationally asked to clear his desk by Daniel Levy yesterday reasons why are still very much unclear but rumours are the Dutch Numpty was caught red-handed prowling the dark side of Amsterdam and enjoying the "delights" the city has to offer. An on-looker had this to say "Blimey....Oh yeah he was enjoying himself alright, you know the old mushrooms, ladies of the night, haha.....Hic...I even saw him enter this brothel called "Phoawwwwwww...sure" (think about that one ) came out of there with a real big........smile on his face"

Pagi had this to say:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content"> MORNING! Sorry I'm late had to take the A50 past Stoke it's beautiful cuts out Birmingham completely.......Anyway onto the point in hand, yeahhhhh Jol done ok but lets be fair the mans a bloody egg head, Amsterdam oh dear the dirty dirty man. Jol has set out the foundations for this club to succede and now I'm gonna be the architect to lay the flooring, roofing, carpet and stuff...errr basically I'm gonna like finish it, the job,this club, I mean....Sh*t

Right as everyone knows from my previous time at Spurs, I am just as much of a fan as you guys so we're all striving for the same thing to make this great club GREAT AGAIN... back in the big time, back in Europe.

I intend to sustain Jol's "Buy British" mentality, as I agree entirely with his philosphy of aquiring all the best young talent.

And overall I am pleased with the crop of players at the club. YOUNG AND TALENTED which is what I always look for, and I know my good mate (Blackburn Boss) Goat likes em young aswell and I respect his opinion.

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

GK = QUALITY DEFENCE = QUALITY 100000000000000+ MIDFIELDERS = QUALITY although I am gonna target a true no.10 ideas man/playmaker and an orthodox left winger STRIKERS = QUALITY Although I'll have to negotiate with Roma to purchase Mido on a permanent basis, and maybe another young striker to keep every1 on their toes, competition for players all that crap.

TARGET: 6th - I demand Europe at the very least

COME ON THE SPURS!

-Insert Funny Punch Line Here-

There i was, a 20 year old good looking lad with the world at my feet, sat in my cosie executive office in Manchester's Health & Safety office. The world was my oyster, fast cars, money, job prospects. Whilst thinking about the current events of the day, including Mrs Norris the tea lady tripping over a cable, i came accross a rather disturbing folder, On the front, a rather large Manchester City logo was upon it, so immidiately, without thinking, i spat at it. After shouting at my personal seceratary, Ms Brook, for putting utter $hite on my desk, i proceeded to read on. It seemed to be a story covered in controversy, with great health and safety risks taken obviously. Stuart Pearce, current Manchester City Football Club boss was the main culprit, along with the entire football team. The dirty bastards hadn't cleaned the City Of Manchester Stadium for 2 years since moving there from Maine Road. Silly really as they didn't pay a fcuking penny for it in the first place. As well as this issue, there had been obligations of gay $ex going on in the male changing rooms after every home defeat (pretty much every game). Now, being an open minded yet full blooded straight male, i can understand every man needs to get his end away, be it inside a male or female. But when neither party is protected, not only is that disgusting, its a breach of Health & Safety act 271.G which states;

'No Unprotected Anal $ex In The Manchester City Changing Rooms After Defeats '

This news meant that, to the joy of United fans everywhere (including myself), Manchester City Football Club would need to be shut down.

Now, at first, i thought obviously about money, with riniging the Sun and other leading papers coming to mind. But, being the smart lad i am (notice the executive office) i decided to crush the ba$tards even more by exposing Stuart Pearce to the Chairmen and demanding his job or else i'd be informing the press and closing the place down. A phone call to 118 118 and minutes later i was yes 6 quid out of pocket, but more importantly on the phone to John Wardle, Chairmen of Manchester City Football Club.

Wardle - Hello?

Boult - Aight G, t'is Rick Boult ere from down local HSE office

Wardle - How'd you get my number you ****

Boult - Swear at me again, and i'll be round yours with a bat you ****

Wardle - Bring it you *****

Boult - I swear, your mine yo

Wardle - Who the **** are you?

Boult - Who am I? Who are you mofo!!!

Similar conversation went on for around 30 minutes before sense provailed ;

Wardle - You theiving Gypsie Ba$tard

Boult - Yeah yo mam

Wardle - You did not just call my mother!

Boult - What if i did homes??

Ok, so after an hour it calmed down....

Boult - It goes like this G, i've got documents stating batty boy Steart Pearce been giving it to the team after home matches, without protection, innit.

Wardle - You must be joking. Stuart Pearce? Batty? I've been $haggin his wife?

Boult - And you never noticed the peni$

Wardle - ********

Boult - Well, enough of that, you either give me his job or the boys and I will be round

Wardle - Is that a threat?

Boult - You ****** bet it is

Wardle - I will **** you up you **** *** *****

More drivel went on before we eventually compromised ( i went round and broke his legs ) and i was later giving the job of Manchester City. By now, your probably wanting to know a little more about myself, well, here goes.

Manager Profile :

Name - Rick James Boult

Age - 20

Location - Manchester

Team Supported - Manchester United

Women Slept With - 7,411

Favourite Tipple - Vodka & Red Bull

Likes - Booze, Chicks, $ex, Drugs, Rock & Roll, Sam Bouchard

Dislikes - Niall Murphy, Ben Jackson, Danny King, Andy Nielsen, Mark D'Ardenne, David Pagi, Dave Williams, Richard Liggins

Managing Profile

Ability To Handle Pressure - 21

Ambition - 34

Loyalty - 1 (Will fcuk off to Man U when Glazer comes a calling)

Media Handling- 31

Professionalism- 43

Temperament - 23 - 21

MANCHESTER CITY NOTIONS

Having been the manager of Manchester City for little less than an hour, here are the latest notions i've put forward to the board. If my demands are not met, i promised i'll $hag all there wives (or husbands).

1 - There's only 1 real club in Manchester, we should therefore locate to somewhere more convenient, say Salford, no clubs there.

2 - Changing locations would mean a change of name, to which to be decided, but Salford United sounds good.

3 - Changing locations would mean a new ground, which should be nicknamed the Palace Of Dreams.

4 - Changing grounds would mean 4 new stands, to be named The 'Cantona', The 'Robson', The 'Sir Alex Ferguson and The 'Sir Matt Busby' End.

5- Changing names would mean a change of nickname, Salford Devils for example

NEW GROUND RULES

NO blasformy of the manager

NO wearing of the old 'blue' colours on matchdays

NO ex players / managers to visit the ground

SILLY SPIKE outside the ground to be cut down and chopped into little pieces to be used when burning down the old ground.

OUT IN THE STREETS THEY CALL IT MUUURDERRRR

Welcome to Charlton.

Or so the sign said as I rolled in, I could go into how I ended up in this situation, but, with me just getting out of Hospital with suspected Kidney Stones, the old noggin isn't in a creative mood, sufficed to say, Curbishley was taken out by a Uzi wielding Psycho by the name of Noreen, and I was given the job mainly because no one else wanted it.

The Squad

3 good Keepers, looks like 1 will go but injuries will force me into postponing their departures.

Defence looks OK, possibly be able to let a couple go to create a little poundage.

Midfield seems to good to be true, and it is, too good to be true that is, too much fluff and not enough gruff, plenty transfer potential so should be some changes in personnel.

Strikers, 1 good 1 bad and 3 old, I can see major changes afoot.

Expectations

The CM/FM tide definitely needs turning, I think my personal progress will be determined by the ability of the other Managers, having always done well with my personal games, I cannot seem to carry it over to net play so 'twill be interesting to see how things pan out. top of the bottom half would be a realistic target I think.

All in all I'm pretty happy with my lot, until I get sacked that is, then I'll do the usual "well if I could have had Liverpool" speech.

The man

the legend

The best dam manager ever seen

.

.

.

.

as RETURNED!!!!!!

Football may have changed but one thing is still the same and forever will be and that is if you have the goat as your manager you are guaranteed entertaining football and of course success. You must know by now that I turned Manchester city into a household name dominating world football with some of the best football ever seen. Then it was on to Portsmouth were I won the league title and finished in the top 4 four times which no other EPL manager achieved (not even Chelsea and united who were managed by 2 of the most overrated managers in the premiership Dunga99 AKA Danny and AsherDSSc AKA Rick )

Out of all the teams you could of managed why choose Blackburn?

Well unlike Mr Murphy I wanted a challenge this season and out of all possible contenders Blackburn were the most suitable. Not to mention one of my favourite players, my fellow Norwegian (ok so I’m only 1/8 Norwegian but it still counts) Mortan Gamst Pedersen is already at the club.

So are you happy with the clubs financial state?

What kind of question is that you numnut? You know that this club only as £1 in the bank (I’m not even joking it seriously is £1) and you ask if I’m happy. Of course I’m not but you know me, I can raise money like no one else so expect major transfer deals to go through during the summer to help balance the books .

What are your plans for the club?

Success.

The first season will be all about making my own squad so don’t expect big things in the first season. Much like my time at city and Portsmouth were in my first season we finished mid table. The second season I will be aiming for top7 or maybe even top 4 and then the third season will be the point were I turn Blackburn into a force to be reckoned with when we win the title.

I know you all want to hear what I think of the competition this year so here goes

David Pagi - Spurs

I know what your thinking so ill say it for you wtf are spurs doing hiring this nutter who underachieves at every club he’s been at? (well it is spurs so just put 2+2 together and you realise the answer is simple).

Anyway imo (lets face it my opinion is FACT! ) pagi should be aiming to win the league title with a squad full of class players and the resources to bring even more in if need be. Spurs also have no European competition to worry about which is a bonus so to finish off spurs should finish top 4 atleast.

Niall ‘Brum are crap’ Murphy - Birmingham

No matter what Murphy says we all know Birmingham are the second best team out of the human controlled teams. So with my nemesis starting with a good squad and money to spend I cant see him being near the bottom like the rest of us (unless he buckles under the pressure which he is showing signs of already of starting with a good team ) so I predict a top 7 finish.

Sam - Villa

Villa are one of the big three along with Spurs and Brum but with O’Leary spending 11m on a bunch of crap will Ellis give Sam the money he wants or will the so called doctor Sam have to ‘examine’ Doug’s back passage some more to get what he wants ? Should finish in the top 8

Mark D'Ardenne - Fulham

Fulham fans will be excited as Mark as a reputation of building teams full of French stars such as …… hmmm….. Well there was that one ……. What was his name…… o ok I tried to be professional but lets face facts even Murphy is better than most of the French guys Mark buys. The only decent French guy is Malbranque but will he want to stay in a team that makes him ashamed to be French? Will fight against relegation and probably finish around 16th.

Rick Boult - City

Was manager of Blackburn who got relegated, he then turned it around winning promotion when out of the blue (and still no one in the epl knows why) Man United offered him a job. Needless to say Rick won the title thanks to his suggar daddy but then it all went t!ts up next season when they were 15 points behind my Portsmouth so Rick left and as now returned to manage united rivals MAN CITY! City have a decent squad, money to spend and a great stadium. The future sure seems bright especially with the best youngsters in England. For now though City are nothing more than a midtable team.

Danny King - West Ham

After being Chelsea will Danny be able to handle the pressure of not having unlimited amounts of cash? I think with the right buys West Ham could be a pretty decent team but knowing dannys past buys he will probably get west ham relegated . I predict that they will survive in 17th place

Ben Jackson - Wigan

Ben has a challenge on his hands with a very poor squad he will have to do all he can to improve it. The Wigan chairman as made this possible though by handing him 10m to spend but the question is who would join a team almost certain to be relegated? Its going to be tight at the bottom this year and unfortunately for Ben wigan will not have what it takes to survive.

Ligs - West Brom

Ligs as had a controversial past in the EPL with rumours of scandals floating round the press daily. Ligs had to get away from these rumours before Niall sent the guys that can only be described as ‘Them’ to do some unearthly things to ligs. After his long time away he has returned taking control of West Brom who have bought well under Robson so Ligs will be expecting a midtable finish although with such a hard season to predict he could find west brom being relegated.

Dave Williams - Charlton Athletic

Ashamed of being compared to Jay as one of the worst managers in EPL history Dave will be determined to show that he is actually an average manager

Top 10 will be the aim for Charlton but with Williams in charge they could very well find themselves routed to the bottom.

And there we have it folks the first of many successful reports coming from Ewood

Revolving door whirls at Craven cottage...Mo barred from the ground after public didsorder offence during friendly against Colchester

After the first hectic week or so at the helm of Fulham, manager Mark D'Ardenne has already implemented changes in the playing staff at the cottage, with a host of high profile departures, with some players who had just been signed by the previous management being shown the door immediately! D'Ardenne, who is keen to put his own stamp on the team, has however brought in reinforcements with 5 players already signing on for the season, 4 on permanent contracts and 1 on loan for the duration of the season.

Players In

Leandre Griffit-Southampton-30k(French)

21 year old winger who is apt with either foot, and has had some succes with me in the past in league 1 and the championship, should be more of a backup player this season but if the worst happens could play more of a part next season.

Cyril Chapuis-Marseille-Free(French)

26 year old who had an ill fated loan spell with leeds during there relegation season, but i know can find the back of the net. I had a word with the lad and he seems keen to rectify the poor opinion of him held by the majority of english supporters, and for no fee, was keen for him to sign on and bolster my wafer thin strikeforce.

Allin Stoica-Siena-Free(Romanian)

Another lad snapped up on a free, and at 26 should provide service for a few years yet. He was signed mainly for his versatility as he can play across the midfield and provides cover for alot of places, however he could force his way into the team, he certainly has the potential.

Jimmy Briand-Rennes-Loan-(French)

This lad is dynamite and ive alot of experience of him firsthand, and was delighted when i got the chance to take him on a season long loan. This lad has pace and can stick the ball in the back of then net and should get us some goals, rumours of a permananent deal are true with negotiations at an advanced stage.

Nigel Reo-Coker-West Ham-£3M-(English)

This young lad is a quality player who i hope will develop into engine room of my midfield for years to come, and with Diop expected to want to leave for a bigger club, in january, he could well feature alot for us over the next season, he also has extensive experience of the championship, which could prove useful. Also when the £3M deal was struck King was attacked by the hammers faithful for selling the starlet so cheaply, i hope the fans were right!

Players Out

Radzinski.T-Genk-£2.5m

Jensen.C-Portsmouth-£2.5m

Leacock.D-Rangers-875k

Jensen.N-Panathanaikos-£1.7m

Helguson.H-Panathanaikos-£2m

Timlin.M-Sheffield united-875k+20% future fee

Pembridge.M-Southampton-230k

With a struggle to keep some big players at the club and the small matter of being some £22m in debt- expect further departures and signings "a l'avenir"

Murphy's announces first new signing.

Birmingham City today held a press conference to announce the signing of Swedish U21 winger, Tobias Hysen for £1m from Swedish club Djurgarden. Although not the big name signing that the fans craved to bolster Birmingham's Premiership campaign this season, Murphy had the following to say:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">I'm very pleased with the signing of Tobias who has the ability to play wide on the left wing and also up front as a support striker. He's an excellent crosser of the ball and has the flair and determination to make it in the Premiership. I am confident that in time Hysen will become one of the most feared left wingers in the country and his signing also gives me good options for the squad with Julian Gray also there. He's a young lad and he's here to win trophies. He's no one season wonder like Rivaldo!! </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

As the Swede joined the club, three stalwarts of the Steve Bruce era were offloaded by the affable Irishman. Steve Clemence, Stan Lazaradis and Muzzy Izzet all leaving for new sides.

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Stan was coming to the end of his time here with the signing of Hysen and although we are sorry to lose a player of Izzet's quality, a potential move for him to Turkey was too good an option to turn down for both player and club. What's that? Yes, we are light central midfield at the minute but let me assure the fans that I'm scouring the market to ensure we close that gap in time for the big KO against Man Utd. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Why didn't you go for Reo Coker?

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Well, quite simply I had a few Czech beers (delicious they were too Frenchie!) and didn't know King was offering his wares about the Premiership. The lines must have been down between Birmingham and London that day!! Fair play to the D'Arsene at Fulham, he nipped in there as fast as a Frenchman does when running from a fight, like lightnin, and nicked him ahead of me. I will be having a few words with King later though about his lack of communication skills on this. I'm surprised he sold him, he must be feeling the pressure already. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

In other news, Murphy also announced that he had completed the signing of Liverpool goalkeeper Chris Kirkland for the beginning of the 2006/07 for £1.7m. The former England goalkeeper will spend the season on loan at West Brom where he anticipates a relegation battle under the "disappointed to miss out" West Brom boss Liggins. Kirkland was heard to say, "there's more chance of Aston Villa winning a Premiership game than me joining WBA!!!"

20th July 2005

Shock Resignation Leads to Shocking Appointment

Portsmouth Football Club were last night thrown into turmoil, as Alain Perrin resigned from his post after a rift with Chairman Milan Mandaric over transfer targets. Details are only now starting to emerge, and are sketchy at best, but it appears that the Serbian businessman had instructed to sign certain players, in preference to his own preferred targets.

Perrin is rumoured to have flown into a rage at this, and stormed out of the club, but not before

Stepping into the breach is newcomer and managerial rookie Jay Mellor, who takes the rather large step up from Everton youth team coach to Premiership boss - although how in charge he will actually be, remains to be seen.

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">"I'm really looking forward to the challenge", remarked Mellor, "and I firmly believe that I have what it takes to make a success of this club." He went on to comment that, "People have told me that the chairman is a difficult man to work with, but I have seen no evidence of that so far. Mr Mandaric welcomed me to the club, and promised to back me in any signings *I* might want to make - obviously within the means of the club." in what was a not-too-subtle message to his employer.

"As for the other managers in the division, for the moment at least, I can't concern myself too much with them. I have a very firm idea of what I'm looking to achieve with Pompey, and if I can put that into action, it will be up to THEM to respond to ME, not the other way around. I have belief in my own abilities - now it is up to me to prove it. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Squad Rundown:

Goalkeepers:

Jamie Ashdown, age 24

Sander Westerveld, age 30

Kostas Chalkias, age 31

Andrea Guatelli, age 21

A couple of solid if unspectacular keepers who should, in theory, tide me over for now - at some point in the future will be looking to improve this position, if things go according to plan. Undecided at the moment who from Ashdown and Westerveld will start the season as number 1 choice, but Guatelli looks like he might have potential for the future.

Defenders:

Matthew Taylor, age 23, - D/WB/AM L

Dejan Stefanovic, age 30, - D LC

Andy O'Brien, age 26 - D C

Aliou Cissé, age 29 - D R, DM

Brian Priske, age 28 - D RC

Gregory Vignal, age 25, D/WB L

Linvoy Primus, age 32, D RC

Andrew Griffin, age 26, D/WB R

A fair few of my defensive players are either pushing, or are the wrong side of 30 - younger, higher quality replacements will need to be brought in as soon as possible. Starting back line will probably consist of Taylor on the left, Stefanovic © and O'Brien in the centre, with Cissé on the right hand side.

Taylor will also provide cover on the left of midfield when required.

Midfield:

Zvonimir Vukic, age 26, AM C

Gary O'Neil, age 22, AM RC

John Viáfara, age 26, DM, M RC

Laurent Robert, age 30, AM L

Richard Hughes, age 26, DM, M LC

Ivica Mornar, age 31, AM R, F C

Salif Diao, age 28, DM

Franck Song'o, age 18, AM R

Richard Duffy, age 20, D/WB R

Liam Horsted, age 19, AM L, ST

Giannis Skopelitis, age 27, DM

Scott Harris, age 20, M C

Not a bad selection to choose from - Vukic in particular looks to have star quality, and making his deal a permanent one from Shakhtar will be a top priority. Laurent Robert, who is due to join at the end of the season on a free transfer, will be our set piece taker - his aim from long range is well documented. O'Neil and Mornar will fight it out for the right wing position, while Viáfara and Diao will provide further competition in the centre. Song'o looks like a quality acquisition from Barca for the future.

Attack

Lomano Lua Lua, age 24, AM R, FC

Collins Mbesuma, age 21, ST

Svetoslav Todorov, age 27, ST

James Keene, age 19, ST

Vincent Pericard, age 23, ST

Dario Silva, age 32, AM/F C

Azar Karadas, age 24, ST

Aleksandar Rodic, age 25, ST

Upfront, we have a few quality players. Lua Lua's pace is well known and rightly feared around the Premiership - if he can up his goal rate, we will have a first class striker on our hands. Mbesuma is something of an unknown quantity, but I have high hopes for this youngster - he may be the one player with the ability to propel us up and out of the relegation fight the media has predicted for us this term. We are a little thin on the ground in terms of quality backup - i will be looking to rectify this asap.

Overall I am relatively happy with this squad - with one or two additions, I firmly believe that relegation should not be an issue for the club this season - and once that spectre is banished, who knows what is attainable.

grrr... any chance of Marlow (or another equally helpful mod finishing off the second paragraph of the above post (ending but not before...) with the following:

*hurling Mandaric's favourite silver plated Kalashnikov out of the office window and straight through the windscreen of the chairman's newly purchased Zastava.*

many thanks

Were all waiting Niall......

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by TopToffee:

grrr... any chance of Marlow (or another equally helpful mod finishing off the second paragraph of the above post (ending but not before...) with the following:

*hurling Mandaric's favourite silver plated Kalashnikov out of the office window and straight through the windscreen of the chairman's newly purchased Zastava.*

many thanks </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

it's ok I think we got the jist

Solid start to the season for D'Ardenne's Cottagers; Mo Illyas revealed as director of football

As you can surely garner from the headline above the first two games of the season have gone well for Fulham with 2 games being played and 2 games being won, leaving Fulham sitting pretty in second place in the table, yes behind chelski , but hey above Niall' rudderless Birmingham -who languish in 3rd. With the games being played against Newcastle and West Ham 6 points was indeed an unexpected yet welcomed surprise. But more talk of matches and results later, now on to transfers. With my squad looking a bit thin and bereft of quality, after the wholesale changes implemented some weeks earlier, i had to fill 3 main positions if i was to stand a chance in what is a very competitive league. These positions were GK, which is of course a vital position, DL-vacated by Niclas' jensens departure and DMC in which team star player, Papa Bouba Diop, had left a gap, but not by leaving the club but sustaing a major injury(damaged spine- oh dear.)

With this in mind i decided that i would take my time to find the right players due to my limited funds, with the final player being recruited 2 days before the premiership kicked off! The following players were recruited.

Players In

Johnson.E-Brondby-£2.5m(Norwegian)

An incredibly talented keeper and for once myself and the goat agreed that he is a player of some ability. At the age of 26 i feel he was a bargain and should stand us in good stead for a considerable time. He has international and european experience so i feel he can add alot to the squad, and can go some way to filling the void left by van Der Saars departure to Man Utd in the summer- with Batista coming through the ranks and Drobny who is returning from serious injury, i feel confident that we have enough in the goalkeeping department to brave the coming season.

De Cler.T-AZ Alkmaar-£2.8m(Dutch)

Tim is a high calibre full back who really emerged as a player of some ability last season during AZ succesful league campaign, and after a much mooted move to Sevilla over the summer failed to materialise i was delighted to have him aboard. He is proficient technically and is composed on the ball, as well as being a voracious tackler and im sure he will be a success in the premiership, unfortunately he is currently out injured after a goal line save against newcastele but i hope he will be back soon as we are a poorer side in his absence.

Rasmus Wurtz-AAB-£2.5m(Danish)

Now this player is someone who really excites me with his potential. You can see his quality everyday in training, he has a real Roy keane drive that is rare for one so young, but is incredibly comfortable on the ball in the manner of Pirlo. His mental stats seem spot on and i really believe that he will go on to be a world class midfielder. He already has an international cap for Denmark, which im sure he will be keen to add to, and has been impressive in the way he has handled himslef having been thrust straight into the first team due to Diop's injury. With diop possibly moving to highbury before the transfer window closes if he can win his fitness battle Wurtz will have to continue to impress if my fine start to the season can continue.

In other news Mo Illyas former manager of fulham has been taken aboard in an executive consultancy role, and has been put in charge of international scouting and youth development. D'Ardenne was delighted with this appointment indicating that he believed Mo could really bring fulham's facilities into the 21st century, however D'ardenne denied that Mo would have any influence over first team affairs asserting, to the fans relief, that the infamous 5-4-1 tactic would not be implemented.

So on to results of the 2 league matches played so far.

Fulham 1-0 Newcastle(away)

In my mind this was a difficult game to begin with, but in reality, i controlled alot of the ball and was good for my win. I had a goal disallowed after 17 minutes when Mcbride shrugged off Boumsong and planted the ball past the hapless keeper. This however did not effect my team as they continued to press and eventually the dealock was broken after 80 minuts when Mcbride ghosted past boumsong(see a pattern here) and nodded in from close range, with my team having the necessary composure to see off newcastle for a good win and a great start to the season.

Fulham 2-0 West Ham

This game was closer than the scoreline suggests with both teams having chances but without Holm, Kings men lacked incisiveness upfront, with harewood and benayoun guilty of misses, where as mcbride in the form of his life proceded to bang in 2 goals and secure the points for Fulham. John missed a few golden opportunities but he is usually a slow starter and i fully expect him to kick on once he gets his first goal. However king has strengthened well considering his poor finances(like myself) and i would be very surprised if he was relegated and fully expect him to avoid relegation. I get the feeling that the hammers will be a force at home but will struggle on there travels- but ultimately will stay up!

So with the new signings seemingly settling in well and a new found depth in the team things are looking promising for fulham right now, and with Williams gaining 4 points from 2 tough games could it be that the 2 perennial underachievers will indeed be Top-Dogs come the end of the season....i bloody hope so as it would be a riot taking the p*ss out of the rest of the clan

ggrrr damn the badge, its just taunting me.....could a mod please sort it out. cheers in advance

EPL Prediction's 2005/2006

Yes thats right ive taken it upon myself to do the prediction for the coming season, mainly because when we suggested Niall did them he was less than enthusiatic, and this should free up some time for him to spend with Mel allowing us to play more . Also as im the only person who shirked from doing them in EPL's previous incarnation, its only fair that i step into the breach....oh and im bored and can't sleep

So here we go, in order of numptiness:-

Niall-Birmingham-Prediction 7th

Niall will once again be hovering like the proverbial bumble bee around the european qualification positions, but will fail to consolidate early form due mostly to an inevitable injury crisis that will see him slip down the table in the early months of 2006. With birmingham he has a good team with some good players, as well as some cash so anything outside the top 10 will be considered an abject failure. Monsieur Escargot' star man- Mikael forsell- guaranteed to bang in the goals!

Pagi-Spurs-prediction-5th or 9th

Once again pagi has spurs and with easily the best squad and finances he should really be aiming for that elusive 4th champions league place, but i foresee him having to settle for a UEFA cup place, which will itleast deliver european competition to the longsuffering spurs fans. Monsieur Escargot' star man- Paul Robinson- with a midfield and strikeforce burgeoning with talent getting goals should not be a problem but stopping them will determine spurs season and in my eyes this is down to the GK.

Sam-Villa-Prediction 10th

Sam has returned to his old stomping ground but his failure so far to sign any meaningful players leads me to "underrate" his team slightly. His squad has quality but will struggle to find consistency in true villa form. With a few signings however the alleged Dr. may be able to push on for europe but i expect him to consolidate this season and push on in the future. Monsieur Escargot' star man is Milan Baros who has talent as proven by his golden boot in the european championships, but if not handled correctly will continue to be the donkey we've all come to love.

Danny-West Ham-Prediction 15th

Danny finds himself at upton park(or the boleyn ground ) and although initially starting in an unfavourable position has demonstrated his ability to find bargains in the transfer market and has built a squad capable of staying up. He also signed most of the players ET wanted so congrats on that. He has precocious talent in his squad in benayoun and will not be short of creativity and flair in midfield and if Holm stays fit should get the goals needed for survival. Monsieur Escargot' star man- Daniel Fredheim Holm will be key and will need 20+ goals to keep the hammers in the top flight, but i firmly believe he is capable of that.

Rick-Man City-11th

The mouth from manchester has inherited a decent squad and has also improved it considerably (too many dirty scottish players for my liking). If he gets his tactics right he should have too much quality to be embroiled in the relegation battle and the depth in his team looks good. He does however have David "i model for Armani" James who will need to be consistent to ensure boult collects the points. Expect him to score goal but also concede. Monsieur Escargot' star man- Andy Cole, this man is vintage bintage and still has the ability to get 20+ goals in the prem...now why did cookie release him

Andy-Blackburn-13th

The goat will go through this first development season appearing to be embroiled in the relegation battle but never really involved in it. Expect murphy to "gloat over the goat" for the duration of the season as Andy finds the balance his team will need to push on and will finish somewhere in the bottom half of mid-table..expect excuses and harassment aplenty from the geordie lad with a fondness for youth . Monsieur Escargot' star man-Morten Gamst Pedersen...can the inspirational winger continue to be a creative force as well as registering the odd goal..i think so, also expect the goat to bleet on about his tenuous link to Norway.. i believe his current story is he once bought some Birdseye steamfesh haddock from said country.

Ligs-WBA-12th

WBA have a team that is well structured and capable if not brillieant on the eye. Don't expect any fireworks but WBA should progress under Ligs, as long as he is wary not to become embroiled in the relegation battle. Few signings have been made so far this season with ligs choosing to keep faith with his current squad- or he just has no money! Not much to say reall..solid but unspectacular! Monsieur Escargot star man- Chris kirkland- the brum scum bound keeper has the class to keep WBA in the game against more illustrious opponents and will prove crucial in the coming campaign.

Williams-charlton-8th

Im going to go out on a limb here Williams so you better not let me down! Dave has a team built by curbishley that has a good balance of graft and skill and with young Darren bent should not be short of goals. Dean kiely although getting on is still undeniably a class keeper and should save dave from sticky situations. With a few million in the kitty there is also money for dave to put his own mark on the team and i believe he could surprise everyone and do well, alternatively he may get drawn into the relegation battle but im inclined to believe that if he starts well he should have enough in the tank to be safe, if not better. Monsieur Escargot' star man- Danny Murphy- although the obvious choice was bent i believe that it is more important to provide the ammunition for the strikers and murphy has the talent and work ethic to do that, and being good with a dead ball should register alot of goals.

Ben/ET-Wigan-19th

Its all said in the odds really and with other relegation candidates being offered at 150-1 for the title and wigan being offered at 2000-1, it should prove to be a long hard season. Ben has bought well in Viduka who should provide goals upfront and there is talent in the midfield with bullard catching the eye. However defensive frailty could leave him exposed and in a shootout with most other EPL teams expect wigan to come off second best. Gabbidon was brought in to shore up the defence but unproven in the prem will have to adapt quickly if wigan are to survive. Also the creaking legs of his goalkeepers may let him down. Mosnieur escargot' star man-Mark Viduka- prolific bruising striker who should get goals even with poor service...maybe not enough to save wigan though.

Jay-Portsmouth-17th

Jay is an unproven entity and thus it is difficult to gauge how he will do this season. In pompey he has a team containing some undoubted talent but with fundamental flaws that could well set him back in his quest for survival. Also translating form from our own games to network games is a difficult task, as most of us have found out to our peril, so on paper pompey are up against it. From his first few games performances have been promising, but with no points on the board, performance counts for little....points win prizes! Monsieur Escargot' star man- Lomano Lua Lua- if the pacey attacker can take on the vacant mantle left by Yakubu, and score 20+ goals then he could save his team from the drop...i however expect him to fall short of that mark and pompey to disappear into the recesses of the championship.

Mark-(me )-Fulham-16th

Now im going out on a limb here by saying i will avoid the drop and others will get relegated, but i truly believe i have a team that can save me from relegation. However with itleast 2 0f Diop,Malbranque and Boa Morte expected to demand a transfer, survival will depend on how i invest and replace these players. On paper my team is reasonable with a better quality of depth than my rivals i feel that is the factor that will keep me in the premiership. Monsieur Escargot' star man- Collins John- when this lad gets going he is a predatory force and i hope he can hit the elusive 20+ mark this season.

I know it is usual to do predictions for the league cup and FA cup but i feel that this will be too close too call so little sense in making predictions in these categories. All i will say is that with Pagi's depth and quality he should challenge on all fronts so should be a force in the cups as well as Niall, the sly ofl codger, who has a knack of going on a cup run. I also predict that 1 lesser team will challenge to the latter stages in each of the cups...but havn't the foggiest who .

Vission is blurrred now and im on the verge of passing out so i thin in offski!

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by keedo666:

EPL Prediction's 2005/2006

Jay-Portsmouth-17th

Jay is an unproven entity and thus it is difficult to gauge how he will do this season. In pompey he has a team containing some undoubted talent but with fundamental flaws that could well set him back in his quest for survival. Also translating form from our own games to network games is a difficult task, as most of us have found out to our peril, so on paper pompey are up against it. From his first few games performances have been promising, but with no points on the board, performance counts for little....points win prizes! Monsieur Escargot' star man- Lomano Lua Lua- if the pacey attacker can take on the vacant mantle left by Yakubu, and score 20+ goals then he could save his team from the drop...i however expect him to fall short of that mark and pompey to disappear into the recesses of the championship. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

kinda begs the question why did you predict 17th place?

haha prove me wrong ....or go down and make me look good....i trust you'll make the right decision!

With the transfer window almost upon us, Murphy has empty pockets but he also has six points from his opening two games. Yes, the Premiership awoke this morning to see Birmingham sitting alongside Chelsea and Fulham as the only two sides with a 100% record so far.

Birmingham 2 - 1 Manchester United

Murphy's first game in charge at St Andrew's and the Premierships longest serving manager in Alex Ferguson was the first to feel the winds of change around the English Premier League. In an intriguing game, Mikael Forssell impressed everyone (especially Andy Nilsen) in a sublime example of top class marksmanship. The Finnish international scoring a brace to put Birmingham in charge, before Man Utd substitute Cristiano Ronaldo notched one with around 15 to go to set up a tense finish. For United, it was not enough. Tobias Hysen comes home with the man of the match award on his debut.

Middlesbrough 1 - 2 Birmingham

Off to the Riverside to face a Middlesbrough side that were also brimming with confidence after totally destroying Rick Boult's Manchester City 5-1 in their opening game at the City of Manchester Stadium. With Yakubu and the discarded City player Vassell up front, Middlesbrough's attack was full of pace and power. With Downing also on the left side we knew this would be a tough task especially as the first kick in the bollox of the new season saw Forssell was ruled out prior to the match for 5 days to 2 weeks. However we had a unlikely hero. Cometh the hour, cometh the Heskey. Grabbing the opener in the first half, then after Yakubu equalised for 'Boro, Heskey fired the Brummies back into the lead before HT which completed the scoring. Felt we were unlucky not to add a couple more goals as a good first away win is secured but was well satisfied with this win.

So 3rd after two games but the crunch is already here as a spate of early injuries see four top players booked in with the physio, including Forssell, Pandiani and Jarosik. With a fixture list featuring Everton, Chelsea and Arsenal in the next three games, I expect Birmingham to be back in their usual position of mid table quite soon!!

Transfers In

Aaron Mokoena - Blackburn (2.5m)

With Goat buying thousands of players, I couldn't believe my luck when he agreed to sell me Aaron Mokoena. He

is comfortable either playing at centre-back or in defensive midfield, he's also capable of long range accurate passing which Viduka is sure to love.

Bjarne Ingebretsen - Lyn (500k)

A bargain at only 500k, Bjarne Ingebretsen is an exciting left wing prospect who'll only get better and is a player that will be one to look out for in a couple of seasons.

Danny Gabbidon - West Ham (P/Ex)

First signing of the season, Danny Gabbidon plus 500k arrived from West Ham with Henri Camara going the other way. Danny will add much needed pace to the centre of the defence which is going to need all the help it can get this season.

Eddie Gaven - Metrostars (1.5m)

Comfortable playing either attacking midfield or just off the striker, Eddie Gaven at only 18 years old has

plenty of potential to be a big player in a few seasons if he continues to progress the way he looks like he'll do.

Kris Commons - Nottingham Forest (750k)

Another good young player, Kris Commons was the best player in League One and I was delighted to get able to bring him to the club. He'll be on the left wing and will be terrorising defences with his tremedous pace running with the ball.

Ivan Hurtado - Al Arabi (750k)

Brought in to add some much needed experience to the squad, Hurtado also have a rocket of a shot on him so he'll be one to watch from free-kicks this year.

Mark Viduka - Middlesboro (2.5m)

Signed the day of the Bolton match, Viduka put in a transfer request at Middlesboro and I moved quickly to snap him up. I'll be looking to Viduka to score the 20+ goals that will give us half a chance of staying up this year.

Spent - 8.5m

Transfers Out

Henri Camara - West Ham (500k + P/Ex)

Matt Jackson - Colchester (250k)

Sold - 750k

13th August 2006

Wigan 2

Viduka 3, Teale 11

Bolton 1

Davies 78

Knowing that Bolton would be a tough side to break down, I was hoping for a good performance in the first match

as all 7 new signings were making their first team debuts. We got off to a great start after 3 minutes when

Baines swung in a cross to the far post which was taken down and blasted past the keeper by Viduka for his first ever Wigan goal.

Teale then made it 2-0 with a neat finish after being put through on goal by Mahon. We looked comfortable for

most of the match until Davies beat the offside trap and easily beat Pollitt to make it 2-1 to get Bolton back into the game but we managed to weather their late surge to secure the first victory of the season.

20th August 2006

Sunderland 3

Georgiev 3, Miller 19, Stead 66

Wigan 2

Hurtado 7, Viduka 90

After beating Bolton, I was feeling confident that we could get at least a point from the game against Sunderland. In a frantic first few minutes, Georgiev put Sundeland in the lead with a well-taken goal from a tight angle but Hurtado scored his first goal for us after blasting in a free-kick that somehow beat the keeper to level the scores at 1-1.

Miller then scored to put Sunderland back into the lead and they added further to their lead with an amazing goal from Stead who somehow managed to score when it looked highly unlikely to make it 3-1. I decided to try and push more men forward towards the end but only managed to score once through Viduka right at the death to make it 3-2.

Overall, 3 points out of 6 isn't a bad start but I'll be looking to tighten up the defence as we're looking capable of scoring enough but we could do without conceding plenty too. I'm confident we've got enough in the squad to stay up but it'll need all the players to be at their best for the whole season.

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by keedo666:

haha prove me wrong ....or go down and make me look good....i trust you'll make the right decision! </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

what he was saying mark is that you said he would get relegated but 17th isnt a relegation position lol 20, 19, 18 go down

same old stupid french

lol i realise that now but i wrote that early in the morning having watched copious amounts of the A-Team and then jumping off the roof of my house for a bet so.......

Shortly after taking charge of the club, I was informed by some kind soul (notably NOT the chairman) that the majority of my transfer budget had already been spent on the £2.5m purchase of Claus Jensen from Mark D'Ardenne's Fulham. I wasn't best pleased to say the least - Vukic was certainly set to be first choice in the more attacking central midfield role.

I decided that, since there was little I could do about Milan's little spending spree, I would look on the bright side - Jensen is a quality player, and I guess competition is never a bad thing at a football club - well, ALMOST never, as Pagi will find out.

With the little money I had left, I set about making what improvements I could to my squad

In the space of 4 days, between the 24th and 27th of July, 3 new faces were added to the Pompey ranks:

Kris Boyd

Boyd, a young Scottish striker, was brought in for the bargain price of just £250k from Kilmarnock. The player has already made his bow for Scotland, and will surely go on to make many more appearances for both the national side and for Portsmouth - he will provide mostly backup to Mbesuma for now - although look for him to crop up with the odd important goal if all goes according to plan.

Gary Kenneth

Another young Scottish prospect, Kenny (to his mates) is most definitely "one for the future", and I fully expect him to develop into a very useful centreback.

Ryan Nelsen

The New Zealander was snaffled from Blackburn for £1.4m, and will slot into my backline alongside the club captain Stefanovic. Nelsen will add some much needed pace to the centre of the Portsmouth defence, and is also very useful in the air.

Also brought in, ableit only on loan from Spurs, was left winger Andy Reid, to provide vital competition for places with Robert.

So, onto the season. Pompey had maintained a 100% record throughout preseason, including an impressive 2-1 victory against Sporting CP, but one glance at the fixture list gave me cause for concern as to how long that would last.

We had been given an absolute nightmare start to the season - the opening day would see us visit Arsenal at Highbury, followed swiftly by, of all teams, Chelsea's arrival at Fratton Park. A tough ask to get anything from these two games, but we'd certainly give it our all...

13th August 2005

Arsenal 2 - 1 Portsmouth

I made the foolish error here of playing Stefanovic, when the captain was not at full fitness, and was swiftly punished, Dennis Bergkamp slotting home his 200th league goal, half way through the first period.

Coming out for the second period, i replaced the tiring legs of Laurent Robert with Andy Reid, and Stefanovic with Nelsen. Whether it was this, or the words I said to the team during the break (or something else entirely), we came out a different side, playing some lovely football, and after about an hour, we got our reward - the equalising goal coming from Lua Lua, at the end of a beautifully flowing move, which had even the stars of Arsenal chasing shadows.

A few minutes later, and after more pressure, Zvonimir Vukic hit the bar when well placed in the Gunners box, and I was led to make my second mistake of the afternoon. I sensed blood, and decided to press forward more, in search of a famous scalp. Unfortunately, after another good chance went begging, we were hit on the break by Arsenal's legendary pace, and Lauren, marauding forwards from right back, was able to slot past Westerveld.

In the dressing room after the match, I did my best to console the lads - letting them know that their performance had deserved at least a point, but privately, I couldn't decide if it was 1 or 3 that we had lost.

The post match media rightly commented that Portsmouth would be disappointed to have lost a match which could have gone either way.

20th August 2005

Portsmouth 0 - 2 Chelsea

And so, onto the second match of our nightmare double header. This one, however also started badly. Within 7 minutes, we were two goals down, both from Eidur Gudjohnsen. Desperate measures were called for, and after some hastily shouted instructions, we managed to stem the Chelsea tide, and the rest of the half passed without incident.

After the break, Reid again entered the fray, as did Claus Jensen, making his debut in place of John Viáfara. Suddenly, the team was transformed, and playing like men possessed. Some of the midfield interplay had the crowd chanting "It's just like watching Brazil" - I had to agree, with one exception - Brazil score.

It appeared very much as if we would too - Andy Reid beat 5 men, on his way to unleashing a piledriver from the edge of the box, which cannoned off the bar and into the arms of a grateful Cudicini - surely a contender for goal of the season had the shot dipped a little more.

The Chelsea woodwork was not safe yet - indeed it would be rattled 3 more times, by Lua Lua, Mbesuma, and Vukic, as we ran the Champions ragged. Unfortunately, through a mixture of luck and judgement, they kept us out, and the game remained at a misleading 0-2, until the final whistle blew.

Several national newspapers later commented on the quality of our play, and on the fact that we actually had more possession AND more shots than our illustrious rivals. Unfortunately their multi-million pound strike force showed a ruthlessness infront of goal that we could not match.

And so, as I look back on the first 8 days of the season, we are - perhaps as expected - without any points, but with plenty of positives to dwell upon as we look to our next match - a potentially very interesting tie against Ben Jackson's Wigan...

Season goes on, but Fulham continue there excellent start;Illyas erects statue of himself outside the ground.

Yes currently 7 games into the league season and despite a few stutters, i lie in 4th position in the league, with goaty hot on my heals. Having won the first 2 matches against Newcastle and Danny kings West Ham, my next match was a tough game away at the Hawthorns. With Ligs absent yet again his team took all the points, even though they were somewhat undeserving, with both his goals coming from horrendous individual errors from my players. Anyway im sure i'll complain more in my match reports.

Anyway with the transfer window closing i decided not to supplement my squad but to wait until january when i will have a better idea where this team is heading. With cover across the board depth is not a problem...however there is a substantial difference in quality between my starting 11 and reserve team, im no Chelski .

So on to the Match reports.

Fulham 1-2 WBA(away)

2 horrendous errors gifted WBA the game, when it was really an even affair in that WBA dominated posession and i had the better of the chances. However WBA raced into the lead with goals from Inamoto and Earnshaw, which both came from sloppiness on the ball- first Reo-Coker passed the ball back to Knight but put too little weight on the pass and Inamoto made an easy interception and slotted past the keeper. Then Espen Johnsen was at fault as he dwelled on the ball and Earnshaw knicked it off him and put it into an empty net..at this point i was boiling over with rage and my monitor was in serious peril. With the 2 goal advantage WBA predictably sat back so i was forced to take the game to them. Which my team did admirably but could only get 1 goal back through the majestic john, for his first goal of the season.

At this point i presses everyone forward and John stole past the WBA defence and slotted home, but it was ruled out for offside ...it ended 2-1 to WBA.

Fulham 2-0 Charlton(Home)

With a tough game at home to charlton, against old rival Dave Williams, the points were won in a 5 minute spell in which John scored twice- with 2 clinical finishes. Williams had his chances but his strikers blew them or my GK rose to the occasion. With a shift to a more defensive formation Charlton could not break us down and the game finished 2-0.

Fulham 2-0 Man City(away)

Probably my best performance of the season as in Rick' absence City were swept aside with some truly quality football, with the goals coming from McBride and John taking there individual tallies to 4 goals each for the season. Wurtz was a terrier in midfield hunting down City playmaker Bautista with real venom, and when City eventually broke us down johnson was on hand to save the day. A pleasing performance allround.

Fulham 1-1 Aston Villa(home)

A tough game was predicted with Bouchards unbeaten Villa coming to a sold out craven cottage to witness the combat of the top 2 placed human managers in the league. I knew Baros would be there main threat on my goal as Bouma would be the main threat on my players shins! As it happened the game panned out quite evenly with Villa just shading the first half after the break my players began to assert themselves on the game but against the run of play Baros stole free and smashed home past my keeper. WIht Mcbride picking up a knock i withdrew him from the fray and introduced Briand making his debut for the club. He made a fantastic impact on the game with his direct running and slick passing immediately causing the villa defence problms. As it was he earned the penalty that got me back into the game as he broke through the villa defence once more and was scythed down by Bouma....John coolly stepped up and smashed the ball past the keeper 1-1, and thats how it finished. Unfortunately shortly after that Briand was again fouled and was stretchered off injured, tarnishing a good performance, redeemed however by some zealous Fulham fans pelting Bouchard with some chicken wings. (No Bouchards were harmed in the making of this report).

Fulham 5-2 Brentford

A one sided game made to look better by 2 well taken goals from the veteran marcus gayle. The fulham goals came from chapuis(on debut), Wurtz(first for the club), Stoica(on debut) and 2 for Collins John. Brentford sensing there demise decided to butcher my players with Mcbride and Boa Morte going off injured, and Knight taking a knock. To be honest the game could not be over soon enough.

Fulham 0-1 Liverpool(away)

Away at anfield my team put in a solid defensive performance, but on the day a moment of class from Gerrard took the points, smashing home from 25 yards after a slick move. John had a goal ruled out for a shove on Hypia(GIT), which was hotly contested by my players, and we pressed late on for an equaliser but despite some scintilating attacking football Liverpool escaped with the points...not a great end to the session but the performance was pleasing.

So 4th in the table and through to the next round of the League cup, and overall a good position that belies pre-season predictions of a relegation fight. However i am in no way suggesting that we can maintain our current form and just aim to avoid getting drawn into a tightly contested relegation battle.

The team is playing well at the moment but 3 players must be mentioned for sustained excellence- GK Espen Johnson who has despite a few high profile gaffs played well, Luis Boa Morte who has devestated defences across the land averaging above 8, and finally young Dutch striker Collins John who has 7 goals in 8 games, with rumours of a call up to Van Bastens Dutch squad.

So......more of the same please!

Birmingham stutter as key players are missing.

My rivals had a huge stroke of luck as Birmingham's impressive start stuttered in three very tough games against Everton, Chelsea and Arsenal...With main man Forssell ruled out of all three games and injuries also ruling out Pandiani, Jarosik, Dunn, Tebily and then left back Jamie Clapham, the very poor standard of reserves were cast into the limelight and naturally weren't good enough for the job.

Everton 1 - 0 Birmingham

Despite the heavy losses in personnel, we really should have had a point out of this game against a very physical Everton team with Ferguson and Beattie starting up front. Everton took the lead on 28 minutes through the impressive Beattie, but after that we played really well - with Heskey the hero against Middlesbrough missing two glorious chances to equalise. A late effort from outside the box from Julian Gray drifted inches past the post when on another day it may have sneaked in. Overall, I felt a draw would have been a fair result here but it just wasn't our day against a good Everton team.

Birmingham 0 - 1 Arsenal

Another narrow loss recorded against the high flying Gunners who are currently unbeaten in the Premiership. Overall, Arsenal deserved their win with most of our pressure coming late in the second half after Arsenal lost the services of Hleb (out for 5 months) and Senderos. We didn't create much against the Arsenal defence with Campbell looking after Heskey and Toure nullifying the threat of makeshift striker Tobias Hysen who lacks a physical presence.

Chelsea 2 - 0 Birmingham

Having seen Andy Nilsen's Blackburn fluke a last minute win here a few weeks previously, I was hoping for even a teeny weeny slice of the huge dollop of luck that Nilsen usually has in his armoury. On the day though we were a well beaten side with Joe Cole and Damian Duff having outstanding games for the defending Champions. At 2-0 down, Heskey had a great chance to bring it back to 2-1 and provide a good last 15 minutes, but when put through the big man hurriedly screwed his effort well wide despite being totally unmarked. ******.

Birmingham 2 - 0 Wigan Athletic

After a run of horrendous fixtures I was delighted to be inviting Ben Jackson's Wigan to St Andrews for my first head to head against one of the crew. Wigan have made a few impressive signings, especially the new £4.5m goalie (how I'd love to have such vast resources of money that Mr Jackson enjoys) and were hovering above us at this stage in the top six. On the day though Birmingham were too strong for Wigan and just before HT, the returning Forssell produced a beautiful cross that saw Heskey left unattended in the middle to head home from close range. As Wigan attempted to come back into the game the most pleasing aspect of the match was that we reduced them to very few attempts at goal. A scrappy game was decided when Oliver Tebily was able to turn in the box from a corner routine and fire home his first goal for the club. A much needed morale increasing win after three straight defeats. Wigan should stay up under Jackson's leadership.

League Cup 2nd Round

Watford 1 - 3 Birmingham

A first minute goal from Forssell made it an uphill task for the Championship outfit, who fought back to 2-1 after Pandiani had added a second goal. Any thoughts of a revival were quickly dashed when the returning David Dunn slotted home from close range to seal a 3rd round tie to Bournemouth at St Andrews. Big Cheerios were passed on though to Williams, Liggins, Boult and as usual in the cups, Mr Nilsen at Blackburn!!

Newcastle 1 - 2 Birmingham

Surprisingly Newcastle haven't had a great start despite an impressive squad but my lads did their best to change that with an absolutely horrendous mix up in the first minute . With no pressure on them at all, Jiri Jaroski and Matthew Upson managed to get themselves into a tangle just outside our box. Nobody bothered to clear the ball and Michael Owen forever sniffing out an opportunity, burst into the box, took the ball from the two Birmingham clowns, rounded Maik Taylor and slotted home. An atrocious start to the game as Murphy jumped out of the dug out and gave the lads a verbal lashing.

However, we came back well with Shay Given keeping Newcastle in the lead with a string of good saves before the main man took over the game...That being Forssell...With a good partnership being forged with Pandiani, the Finnish striker equalised in the second half silencing the forever biased and loud Geordie crowd. With the game petering out into a draw, Newcastle began a bit of time wasting - considering they were at home maybe its no surprise they are struggling - but it was to backfire as in the 92nd minute Forssell was put through one on one with Shay Given. As the Irishman approached, Forssell in a moment of magic associated with Murphy's sides, casually lifted the ball over his head and into the empty net....YESH!! Murphy went crazy on the touchline as this win puts us just three points behind the league leaders with many of the top sides already played. If we can push on in the next few weeks we could set ourselves up for a good season.

The Mission...

Save West Ham from relegation.

The game plan...

I haven’t got a clue apart from preying to Jesus.

What have I taken on here at West Ham???? A club that’s deep in debt with a 25 million pound loan and a back balance already in the red.

There can be little doubt that this season is going to be an education, and will be a long hard season trying to keep West Ham in the premiership. That said, after a relatively successful pre season and promising start, there is every reason to be optimistic that even if we do go down we’ll see some entertaining, attractive football. It begs the question, would be going straight back down be that damaging to West Ham Football club? I’ll make a rod for my own back and say no, it wouldn’t. For what its worth I’d much rather see us blood some of our youth team players, give them a season of first team experience and then take the Championship by storm next season as a tighter, younger, hungrier outfit.

Whilst I’m making every attempt to be positive, the national tabloids’ preview of the season hardly made good reading. Whilst another promoted team managed by Ben/ET have 11 million to spend on new players, West Ham have only 3 million to spend on new players. You can only wonder how much longer Danny King can be expected to pull rabbits out of a hat.

It’s only words, the Bee Gees once sang, and words are all I have. Words are all this club have and my, oh my, don’t they have a way with them. It’s not exactly difficult. Your club has just been promoted, you’re £25 million in debt and you face the prospect of balancing the books whilst your prime assets get tempted away by the lure of filthy lucre. What do you do? I may be an expert on football but what I wouldn’t do is hit the fans with a constant stream of negativity.

The first piece of business was to sell some players which would enable me to bring in new better players that would hopefully keep us in the premiership.

Players Out…

Matthew Etherington to Sunderland for 2.4 million.

With the formation I’m going to use there was no place for Matthew in my team and being one of only a handful of players with any real value I cashed in on the young winger.

Teddy Sheringham to Sheffield Wednesday for 190k.

The legend that is Teddy was earning 13k per week and with the board already on my back to reduce the wage bill I had to let him go with a tear in my eye. I would have loved to keep Teddy but the mind won over the heart.

Daniel Gabbidon to Wigan for P/Ex.

The only position where West Ham has any real depth is there defence so when I meet Ben/ET at service station on the M25 to talk about a deal for Henri Camara and he suggested that Gabbidon could be a possible part exchange I knew I had to let him go.

Shaun Newton to Crystal Palace for 850k.

Shaun was again another player who didn’t fit in my formation so with funds for new players still top of my list I was happy to agree a deal with Crystal Palace.

Tomas Repka to Messina for 325k.

Tomas was a main earner at West ham and was hmm basically one crap player who would give away penalties at a drop of a hat. What more do you need to know about this water carrier.

Jemel Henry to Aldershot for free.

Jemel didn’t look like he had what it took to become a premiership player so when Aldershot offered to take him of my hand for free I accepted.

Nigle Reo-Coker to Fulham for 3 million.

Yes one of the West Ham stars was sold off to help fund new players. I didn’t want to see this lad go but 3 million was too good of an offer for this young lad. I’m sure he will do a good job for Mark and Fulham.

Fans hit out at Reo-Coker sale

After the conformation that Reo-Coker was sold to Fulham the West Ham fans hit out at there manager Danny King and the West Ham board for letting such a young English talent leave the club to join a rival. Many managers couldn’t believe that King sold off Reo-Coker and the Birmingham manager Niall Murphy also added his amazement that King had sold the player.

King hit back by saying

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Look I know I have sold of one of the clubs young stars for a small fee but these things have to be done in football and I only hope that this transfer doesn’t come back and slap me in the face at a future date.

I would also like to remind other managers to keep their noses out of my clubs business as I do remember one manager spending too much cash at Everton football without really selling anyone of worth and taking his club into administration

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

With 6.75 million brought into the club I was able to buys some players who would hopefully take the club forward

Players In…

Henri Camara for P/Ex and 500k from Wigan.

Offering formidable attacking support to the forward line, Henri Camara is capable of breaking free from midfield to get in among the penalty box action and scoring those all important goals. The skillful striker - a houselhold name in Senagal after scoring his country's golden goal against Sweden in last summer's World Cup - signed a three-year deal to become my first signing

Demetrio Albertini for Free.

Albertini is a wonderfully composed midfielder who has bags of experience having played with Milan, At Madrid, Lazio and Barcelona and his country for many years. Apart from a loan spell with Padova Calcio in 1991 Albertini has spent most of his whole career with AC Milan, where he has picked up five League championship medals and won the European Cup in 1994. There are rumours his form may have dipped some what but despite his vast experience, he is still 34 and should help West Ham this season with his composure and passing abilities.

Daniel Fredheim Holm for 1.3 Million from Valerangs.

This was my main transfer target over the summer and I had to beat off tough competition from the like of Wigan and Blackburn but in the end working for a top class manager swung it in my favor. I’m hoping Holm will score the goals that keep us in the premiership.

Pablo Barrientos for 725k from San Lorenzo.

Pablo was another player I had to battle it out for. Charlton under the management of Dave Williams made a late offer for the player but again he picked the class manager.

Barrientos will be one for the future and will be the next generation of West Ham players.

Danny Mills for free from Manchester City.

Combative and committed, Danny made just two starts and five appearances as a substitute before the 2002 World Cup Finals but was one of the successes of the tournament for England, starting all five matches. I’m hoping he bring he’s battling qualities to the West Ham team and a big thanks you to Rick Boult for letting him go out on a free.

Labinot Harbuzi for 250k from Feyenoord.

Labinot was one of ET only good buys from FM05 and I’m hoping I can turn him into the same kind of start that Mr. Jackson did. Again he will be part of the next generation of West Ham stars but is unlikely to start too many games this season.

Lorenzo Amoruso for 100k from Blackburn.

Talented and uncompromising defender signed from Glasgow Rangers in July 2003 after six years with the Ibrox outfit. Started his career with home-town club Bari, before spells with Mantova, Pescavo and then Fiorentina. Enjoyed huge success in Scotland, winning three Scottish Premier League titles, and the domestic treble on two occasions but has found the going harder in the English top-flight. Underwent knee surgery in 2003 and subsequently needed another operation to correct a heel problem. Its true what they say you can always find a bargain at the goat shop and Amoruso is one of those at this price.

Pablo Vitti for 350k from Central

Again I had another battle on my hands trying to sign Vitti as Blackburn and Wigan were also in the hunt. I think he knew he would get more of a first team opportunity at West Ham. Pablo will be given the chance to shine this season if we are in a comfortable position but my have to wait until next season if we are in the expected dog fright at the bottom of the league.

So that’s 6.75 million received and only 3.2 million spent so at least the West ham board is happy because the fans are already on my case .

More to follow soon .

Fulham continue to impress, but injuries take there toll as sicklist grows

What can i say to summise my season with Fulham so far? Well i'll start with the positives and that is i find myself 5th in the premier league table, with ten games gone. Also Collins John finds himself joint top of the league scoring charts with 7 goals. Luis Boa Morte also tops the average player rating charts with an average in excess of 8. I have also passed through the first two rounds of the carling cup without any trouble with teams largely made up of youth with a smidgeon of experience thrown in.

However no matter how good my start to the season has been, there are certain elements that temper the success. Primarily i have had a horrendouse run on the injury front, with itleast 2 and up to 5 first team players out at a time since the beginning of the season, indeed i have never had the chance to deploy a team i deem my "first choice" due to the spate of players arriving at the medical centre. However the gravest fact is that damned rogue niall murphy has managed to usurp me positionally in the league, and with a game coming up, is something i hope to rectify.

N.B. the table pops up on the epl website when niall finally overhauls me....i smell a rat!

Game wise i played a further 4 games winning 2 and drawing 2, with the results and goalscorers as follows:-

Fulham 2-1 Spurs(home)

Goals-Malbranque,John-Keane.

We started well, and immediately asserted ourselves on a tottenham side low on confidence after a rotten start to the season. The strategy seemed to be working as we took the game to them and were rewarded when Malbranque fired past the keeper from 10 yards after a sweet interchange of passes with the dynamic Wurtz. This seemed to fire spurs up and they got back into the game with both teams having chances to score. The breakthrough happened when keane headed in from a corner that was given in error by the referees assistant. 1-1 forcing me to attack from the platform i was sitting back from. However cometh the hour cometh the man, and indeed collins john was on hand to take the ball at his feet from Stoica, turn Dawson and smash home from the edge of the box...2-1 3 points for Fulham and a happier manager indeed.

Fulham 0-0 Boro(home)

Simply put bore draw... i had the better of the chances and Wurtz missed a pen 2 points dropped.

Fulham 1-1 Bolton(away)

Goals-John(pen)-Nolan

A tough game against big sam' trotters and to be honest i was second best for most of the game, taking the lead early and then hoping to sit on it. However Bolton struck back after half time(when that rat murphy showed his head in gartside' box), but i managed to hold on for a draw. Johnson played well in goal and kept me in the game.

Fulham 1-0 Cheltenham(home-AET)

Goal-Briand

The kids were sent out for this game and they did not dissapoint, despite the game being taken to extra time, with Fulham controlling the game throughout. The tie was settled in the second half of extra time when Briand showed his class rounding 2 defenders before chipping over the GK with a sublime finish...thats class baby!

With injuries mounting, as well as a worsening financial situation, i hop to get to january with as many points as possible, when i can trim the fat from my team. As ever the aim is to avoid relegation, but on current form i hope to stay well out of that...fingers crossed. Now anyone for a "murphy sandwich" ...goaty...???

and again the badge doesn't work...damn this i blame the premier league...NOT personal error as has been suggested

So far so good for Birmingham.

Into 4th place in the league, not bad on a spend of only £3m, a fifth of what the Goat has splashed out on Blackburn Rovers only to have the same number of points in the table....Of course Murphy had to play the next set of matches without his star striker Forssell....

Recent Games was head to head almost all the way....

Birmingham 1 - 0 West Ham

Danny King has already stated that he's worried about relegation and on this performance his side looked like a championship outfit in the making.

The 1-0 final score line was not a fair reflection of the complete domination Birmingham enjoyed in this game where King was indebted to goalkeeper Roy Carroll for keeping the score line respectable. My £1.9m Czech international right winger sealed the points from the spot in the first half. West Ham have the quality to survive but the question is, do they have the right manager?!!

West Brom 0 - 2 Birmingham

A midlands derby and a match against a Liggins controlled side which meant we knew that WBA would be fired up and giving 200% in an attempt to beat my side.

Oh the joy then when in the first two minutes David Dunn, who was on a high after being called into the England squad for the injured Chelsea player Joe Cole, fired home a rasping drive from 25-30 yards beating Albion's reserve keeper all the way. As Birmingham completely controlled the first half, the second goal arrived from another piece of magic from Dunn. Drifting infield from his position wide on the left, Dunn beat a few static Albion defenders before hitting another unstoppable shot past the keeper. After HT, WBA made a good attempt to get back into the game, but moving to a 4-5-1 for the final 25 minutes saw the game out.

Birmingham 3 - 3 Charlton Athletic

A tremendous match against Dave Williams' Charlton here at St Andrews with both managers agreeing after the game that a draw was a fair result but also rueing missed opportunities to win the game. Charlton have a good record so far on the road so I was anticipating a tough game and we got it. Charlton went 1-0 and 2-1 up with Heskey and Pandiani bring us back into the games both times. Finally in the second half, Birmingham took the lead at 3-2 but a spectacular finish by Darren Bent a few minutes later saw the points shared - although Pandiani should have won the game but hit the bar when straight through!!

Birmingham 1 - 0 Bournemouth

Comfortable win in the 3rd Round of the Carling Cup, Damian Johnston scoring the winner to send us into Round 4.

Next up, it's Rick Boult....

Table After 10 Games

Have you ever has that sinking feeling?

Well I certainly have at West Ham

After winning my opening game of the season against much favoured Spurs the wheels have well and truly fallen of the bandwagon.. With the unrealistic amount of injuries in the game and generally starting with a half baked team we are struggling in the relegation zone within the premiership.

Our main problems are:

*No Cash

*No World class player only a few young ones with ability

*No real way to raise cash via player sales

*No way to ever field a first 11 (not even a first 7) with the amount of injuries I’m getting

*No luck like Mr Murphy and Mr Nilsen get game in game out

The only real plus they have is ME, a world class manager in the making

Results….

Premiership Game 1

West Ham 2

Holm 5, 12

Tottenham 0

Man of the Match: Konchesky 9/10 West Ham

Attendance-35559

Refereed by Matt Messias

Maybe this was the best time to play pagi as Spurs had a few injuries in there team with the like of King being out. I couldn’t have asked for a better start with Holm heading a Yossi Benayoun cross pass Paul Robinson. Then Holm picks the ball up in the centre circle and left the spurs midfield for dead hitting a low left drive into the bottom of the net. With pagi knowing the only way he could stop Holm in this game was to injure Holm his players done just that with Holm limping off in the 17 minute . For the rest of the first half it was all the hammers. Spurs did come back in the game in the second half and Mido had a goal ruled out for offside but West Ham was the better team in the game but did look a bit toothless without Holm. 2-0 Win

Premiership Game 1

Fulham 2

McBride 2, 79

West Ham 0

Man of the Match: McBride 9/10 Fulham

Attendance-21961

Refereed by Matt Messias

The bad news for this game was Holm was still out injured. With morale high after the Tottenham result I was hoping for a point even without him. McBride was the only real difference between the teams putting Fulham into an early lead. Yossi Benayoun and Noble were at the heart of most of West Ham best play but there shooting let them down in front of goal when really they should have scored. Second half with Fulham still leadng 1-0 I deciecded to thorw the kickten sink at the Fulham goal and used all 3 subs in the 60th minute, no sooner had I done this then one of my players when of injured playing the last 25 minutes with only 10 men. With Mcbride in great form nicked a second to seal Marks first win over me in Football manager . 2-0 Defeat

Premiership Game 3

West Ham 2

Holm 45

Bolton 3

Fernandez 19, 59 Svensson pen 85

Man of the Match: Fernandez 9/10 Bolton

Attendance-35583

Refereed by Chris Foy

The good new was that Holm passed a late fitness test to start the match but the bad news was Henri Camara picked up an injury in training. This was one of Carroll worse game for the club this season letting in 3 goals in only 4 shots on target. How I ever lost this game is beyond me with the amount of possession and chances I enjoyed against Bolton but you always get games like these in football so I’m hoping it will even itself out over the season. 3-1 Defeat

Premiership Game 4

Sunderland 1

Georigiev 32

West Ham 2

Camara 45 Harewood 66

Man of the Match: Carroll 9/10 West Ham

Attendance-32506

Refereed by Andy Durs

With Sunderland taking the lead in the first half I was fearful of another defeat but in the second half Camara scored his first goal for the club with a 20 yard effort on goal. Knowing I had to try and win games like these if I have any chance at staying in this division I put on Harewwod with 30 minutes to go and he immediately replayed my faith with the winner after only 6 minutes after coming onto the pitch. Carroll pulled of some fine saves late on but West Ham ran out deserved winners.

2-1 Win

Premiership Game 5

West Ham 0

Portsmouth 0

Man of the Match: Robert 8/10 Portsmouth

Attendance-35541

Refereed by Rob Styles

With Portsmouth manager Jay being call away on urgent business it was left to his assistant manager to fill in for him. This was a boring game mainly due to Rob Styles handing out cards for fun and spoiling the flow of the game my players collecting 5 along the way. Laurent Roberts was Portsmouth main danger man supplying crosses for the strikers which luckily for me they couldn’t finish. 0-0 Draw

Premiership Game 6

Blackburn 2

Deschacht 27 Young 89

West Ham 1

Holm 16

Man of the Match: Pedersen 8/10 Blackburn

Attendance-29338

Refereed by Phil Dowd

If Andy Nilsen could bottle his luck and sell it on he could be a multi millionaire in his own right by now . This was a game of two half’s with Blackburn making a bright start but West Ham finishing the much stronger team. Holm scored a good goal running past a Blackburn defender and beating the keeper only for Blackburn to score a thunderbolt from outside the area via Deschacht. Second half West Ham went on the attack only for there keeper to make save after save, the best of the chance coming when Holm was sent clear only for the goalkeeper to somehow save the one on one. Another good chance was when we hit the bar but with West Ham in control of this game I decided to go for the win and stuck on Harbuzi with 10 minutes left only for him to lose possession in the middle of the park and it left 2 Blackburn forwards bearing down on goal with only one defender back . With Goats luck the forward passes the prefect ball to his strike partner who had an empty net to slot the ball into it and win the game in the 89th minute. Andy later declared it was his great tactical change that won him the match but it was clearly an awful mistake by Harbuzi that gifted them the 3 points . 2-1 Defeat

League Cup 2nd Rd

Braford City 2

Windass 75, 106

West Ham 4

Vitti 35, Weatherall og 101 Harewood 112, 115

Man of the Match: Harewood 8/10 West Ham

Attendance-8832

Refereed by Andy Penn

Put out the mainly the reserves out for this game as we had another big game against Manchester United at the weekend. Vitti got his first start for the club and made the first goal himself after some fine work outside the box then slotting home but he then picked up a minor injury which I decided best not to take any chances so he was replaced. The evergreen Windass then scored a good goal after an error from Luke Davenport gifted him the ball. Then the game went to extra time and with West Ham better fitness starting to show as Weatherall put the ball into his own net. Windass scored again but Harewood popped up with a quick double to seal victory and send us into the next round.

4-2 Win

Premiership Game 7

West Ham 0

Manchester United 0

Man of the Match: Carroll 8/10 West Ham

Attendance-35588

Refereed by Andy D’urso

A great battling performance for my team against one of the great EPL teams in today football. Yossi Benayoun scored a stunning goal in the 10th minute only for the ref to rule it out for offside but on closer inspection the goal cearly should have counted . Carroll again was our main man pulling of some saves from the likes of Rooney and Smith but I was left to rule that goal that would have given us 3 points. 0-0 Draw

Premiership Game 8

Birmingham 1

Pitak pen 40

West Ham 0

Man of the Match: Carroll 9/10 West Ham

Attendance-30856/I]

Refereed by Rob Styles

Facing the second most luckiest manager in EPL I came to st Andrews with a game plan which was to defend, defend, defend and defend striaght out of the bible of the lengendally Mo . My team done me proud mainly keeping Birmingham chances to long range efforts or last ditch tackles. Again lady luck didn’t shine on me but on the Irish one. Birmingham was awarded a penalty that won them the game. Niall reaction after this game was the West Ham team was good enough to stay in the premiership but maybe not there manager. You wait until our next game your luck can only last so long unless you’re buying the bottled stuff of the goat . 1-0 Defeat

Premiership Game 9

West Ham 0

Everton 1

Cahill 8

Man of the Match: James McFadden 8/10 Everton

Attendance-30508

Refereed by Barry Knight

Another game that my football deserved to be awarded some points from but on Everton first attack on goal they scored from a corner via Cahill header. We had our fair share of chances to score but our morale is hitting a low and it showed in front of goal. The best chance was when Holm hit the bar and the ball fell straight to Harewood who somehow missed an open goal from 5 yards out . 1-0 Defeat

Premiership Game 10

Arsenal 2

Reyes 7, 33

West Ham 0

Man of the Match: Cole 9/10 Arsenal

Attendance-38408/I]

Refereed by Matt Messias

Just what you need when you’re on a losing steak is taking on Arsenal at Highbury. Arsenal was lot better team on the day and two well worked goals from Reyes gave them the victory they deserved. We had a few chances to score but we were never really at the races in this game and another negative was we picked up another two injuries in this game. 2-0 Defeat

With form like this I could soon find myself out of a job but it could be worse I could be Rick or Pagi but they are good managers and I’m sure with the teams they have they will be climbing the league in no time and leaving me at the bottom of the table . With the injuries mounting up and no real depth within the squad the future doesn’t look great down at West Ham. On top of this our first game Sunday will be against Chelsea but after that will have Wigan managed by ET in a game I have to win if there is any chance that I might stay up.

More to follow soon

Thank God for the assistant

Due to other committments, I had to leave the new assisstant in charge of affairs for July and August. It's a good job I did as well...

Firstly, transfer news:

IN

Tom Muyters - Gk - £300k from PSV

Good keeper, one for the future, will see more action when splitter Kirkland leaves next season

Nicolas Lombaerts - DLC - £350k from AA Gent

20 year old CB with a big future in the game

Andrew Considine - DC - £20k from Aberdeen

Absolute bargain for a brilliant young talent. 18 years old but already with U21 caps, sent straight out on loan to Cardiff

OUT

Lloyd Dyer - AML - £400k to Plymouth

Good pace, but not enough quality at this level.

There have been some transfers arranged for January, but they shall remain a secret for now.

Anyway, onto the fixtures. My trusty assistant took charge of the following results.

WBA 3-1 Liverpool

Spurs 0-0 WBA

WBA 2-1 Fulham

Bolton 0-1 WBA

WBA 1-1 Sunderalnd

Portsmouth 2-2 WBA

At this stage, we were as high as 2nd, although the team did go down 1-0 away to Plymouth in the League cup. Unfortunately I came along and f**ked it all up...

WBA 4-6 Blackburn

Blackburn 3-0 after 10, WBA 4-3 up after 25. 1 man sent off, 1 off injured reducing WBA to 9 men, 2 penalties for Blackburn - this game had it all. At the end of the day, though, Blackburn deserved the 3 points

Man Utd 2-1 WBA

2-0 down after 8 minutes, Liggins stormed off leaving the faithful assistant in charge (well, I was disconnected, but I prefer my story.) A late consolation was all the team could muster

WBA 0-2 Birmingham

Murphy, annoyingly, took all 3 points home, after David Dunn raveged the Baggies in the first half with two individual 20 yard strikes. WBA then controlled the 2nd half but couldn't break down the resolute scummers from Small Heath.

Everton 2-1 WBA

Horsfield gave the Baggies a half time lead, but Everton fought back to claim an unlikely and fortunate victory.

So there we are, I come in and lose 4 on the bounce. Still, it can only get better, can't it?

Liggins finally doesn't lose!

Yes, it's happened, Richard Liggins has picked up his first point in charge of WBA. Fans rejoice, and an open-top bus ride is being planned.

WBA 0-1 Arsenal

A decent performance, but the game changed on 39 minutes when Liggins was sent to the stands for decent, after intimating that the ref needed glasses (Yes the bloody game disconnected me again, sort it out SI.) It was 0-0 and very even. Come full time, Earnshaw had been sent off and Henry grabbed a late winner. Grr.

Chelsea 2-1 WBA

An excellent performance from the lads, a point would've been fair. Gera put the Baggies one up with 10 to go to the break, only for Tillen to equalise just on the stroke of half time after a defensive error from Albrechtsen. West Brom controlled the 2nd half thanks to some tactical genius from Liggins, only for young carthorse Carlton Cole to grab a winner in the last minute. Grr, again.

Newcatle 3-3 WBA

Woohoo, a point, but it should've been all 3. Gera put the Baggies one up after 5 minutes, only for Owen to pounce on another defensive error, this time from Watson, after 20. Kamara restored the lead to put WBA ahead at the interval. Shortly after the break Shearer was left unmarked and equalised for the Newcastle, before Luque put the Toon into an undeserved lead. But in injury time some sort of justice prevailed, as man-of-the-match Koumas grabbed a point.

After 6 straight defeats, a draw away from home was very welcome. The performances have started to improve, and with Albion having a game in hand and the chance to move up from 17th to 13th, plus plenty of transfer activity planned for January - high earning reserves out, fresh faced young talent in - things should be about to improve.

Hopefully.

Boing Boing

Fulham continue to perform above expectation, but the spectre of administration looms!

Nearing the half way mark in the season, Fulham lie in 5th in the premiership, a position that would see them qualify for europe, if they can maintain these level of performance for the duration of the season. In the league cup all goes well, with a trip to the Madjeski stadium next on the cards, a match which D'Ardenne has tipped to be a cracker. However it seems that Fulhams best ever season in the premiership, is destined to be ruined, after a series of unfortunate events, beginning with a horrendous injury crisis which lasted for 2 months and when the team has finally recovered to a decent level, the clubs finances begin to spiral out of control. This seems somewhat unfair to D'Ardenne who feels misled by chairman Al Fayed. D'Ardenne took over the club with the realisation that the club was £2m in the red, and after some wheeling and dealing in the transfer market came out ahead, by over £1.5m. However despite making money im currently losing £500k a month, even though im currently under wage budget, and am at a loss of what more could be done to stem the flow, except to dismantle my squad. Thus it is with great sadness that i am placing Papa Bouba Diop and Luis Boa Morte on the transfer list. With both player expectd to go for fees in excess of £6/7 million, they should provide the money that will see the club comforably avoid administration. This however will ravage my squad, and with little money to bring in reinforcements, my season could easily subside into mediocrity, or worse relegation. Damn you Sigames, you've ruined me .

Anyway onto the match reports.

Fulham 1-3 Sunderland(home)

goals-John-Etherington,Flitcroft,Gray

Dour performance really with only Collins "the hitman" John turning up for the game, and with so many injuries(5 missed this 1 i think) my team could not cope with a surprisingly decent Sunderland. Collins john did however conjure up some magic when he chipped the ball over a defender, a la gazza, and fired past Davis with a stinker of a shot.

Fulham 0-0 pompey(away)

This game despite not having goals was quite exciting with both sides having good chances to score and indeed win the game. Lua Lua terrorised the fulham defence and created lots of chances for himself but didn't take the opportunity to score. John and Mcbride were presented with the better chances of the game but failoed to find the back of the net, John in particular geting onto a pass slotted thorugh the pompey defence by the ever improving Reo-Coker, and firing past the keeper but just wide, 2 points dropped really, but the game was quite even, however given i was away 1 point is not to be sniffed at.

Fulham 4-2 Blackburn(home)

Goals-John(2)Mcbride(2)-Joo Young(2)

This game was billed as a cracker of a match with both teams being attack minded, and it certainly did not dissapoint. With Gardner carrying a strain the fulham defence was below par as was the blackburn defence, missing 2 central defenders. In addition to this the teams boasted the 2 best strike partnerships in the premiership(perhaps along with brum's) so goals seemed inevitable. Fulham opened the scoring when larsen panciked and crossed the ball into his own box under pressure from John and Mcbride rose imperiously nodding past the keeper, with larsen credited with the assist . Fulham continued to completely dominate in the opening 20 minutes and were rewarded when petit hacked down john conceding a penalty. Being the last man the fulham faithful chanted "off,off,off" gleefully but the referee decided to only award a yellow card, another slice of luck for the "goat pie". Retribution was swift as john slotted home for his 10th premiership goal of the season, giving Fulham a 2 goal lead. In typical goat fashion Blackburn rallied and hit back through korean prodigy Joo Young(or egg foo yung, however its spelt ). despite a now even game Young got another and you could tell goaty thought he was destined to win. Petit then omitted another cynical foul on Diop and surely he was destined to receive his marching orders, no he wasn't . At this point goaty removed him from the game as he could only get lucky so many times. However cometh the hour cometh the "hitman" and wizardry from John unlocked the blackburn defence allowing Mcbride to slot home to give Fulham the lead. Shortly after from an innocuos position some 30 yards out John unleahshed a belter into the top corner, making the score 4-2. Goat then had connection problems so left the game and i saw blackburn off for the win. With goat in charge they may have scored but i feel i still would of held them off. A great result .

Fulham 2-2 Man Utd(away)

Goals-McBride,Wurtz(pen)-Van Nistelrooy, Ronaldo

A tough game but my lads really exceeded themselves dominating a side containing a host of big players. But for the absence of john i feel i might of won the game as i would have had more of an edge upfront. As it happened i left old trafford with a point and united were definitely the happier side. Unfortunatley every time i scored united conjured up a reply at will, and the game finished deadlocked, but it was a performance to be proud of.

So looking to the future aims include avoid administration, beat Murphy and preferably maintain a decent league position

Baggies improve as others feel the strain

With Messers D'Ardenne, Boult and Pagi all feeling the strain, West Bromwich Albion are slowly pulling away from the drop zone.

WBA 3-2 Wigan

Ben Jackson was sent back up the M6 with his tail between his legs after his expensively assembled Wigan side were dispatched by the Baggies. Just 2 minutes were on the clock when Ellington (2) scored his 1st goal for his new club against the team he left in the summer. But typically WBA didn't wanna make life easy for themselves, and after Neil Clement gave away a needless penalty, Kavanagh (9 pen) quickly got the Latics back on level terms. Ellington (16) quickly restored the home team's advantage, and when Earnshaw (50) made it 3-1, the game looked to be over. Roberts (72) kept up the trend of scoring against former clubs, but West Brom hung on to record a well deserved victory.

WBA 0-0 West Ham

Danny King was lucky to get anything out of this game, as West Brom dominated. Despite 1st choice keeper Roy Carroll being injured for the Hammers, Shaka Hislop showed he was a worthy replacement with an outstanding performance, producing save after save. As it was, West Ham could've nicked an undeserved victory, but Haydan Mullins hit the post after a one-on-one with 10 minutes to go.

The next 2 games were controlled by the assistant manager, due to Liggins being on a scouting mission (more bloody technical problems at my end )

Middlesbrough 1-0 WBA

Charlton 1-1 WBA

Very annoying, as I was confident of getting more than a point from those 2 fixtures. But, these things happen, and so it was time to look forward to the Boxing day clash with under pressure Rick Boult

WBA 3-1 Man City

City turned up, but Rick Boult didn't. And he made the right decision, as his side gave a poor performance, despite taking an early lead through Cole (3). WBA got back on level terms in fortunate circumstances, Onuoha (26 og) diverting a cross past the stranded David James. The Baggies took advantage of this fortune and went on to dominate, with Horsfield (59, 72) heading home twice from Greening free kicks to secure the 3 points.

Villa 2-2 WBA

2 days later and Villa Park was the venue. Sam Bouchard had slowly and quietly taken his Villa side upto 7th in the league, so this was always going to be a tough game. And in the 1st half, Villa showed their superior class with a dominating performance. Despite this, they fell behind to another Horsfield (19) header from a Greening cross, this time from open play. The home side deservedly levelled 10 minutes later, Baros (29) scoring a wonderful equaliser. Villa continued to press, but the sides went in level at half time.

The second half was a totally different story, as it was West Brom who made all the running. They deservedly took the lead for a second time, Horsfield (63) again heading home at the near post, this time Inamoto the provider. But yet again Baros (68) popped up with a quick equaliser. After this the game somewhat fizzled out, and a draw was a fair reflection on what was a highly entertaining game.

We're now up to 14th place, only 6 points off 7th. Unfortunately we're only 6 points off 18th as well, so it's all rather close. But we now enter the January transfer window with the prospect of plenty of big earning reserves leaving, freeing up some money to spend only hopefully 3 or 4 new faces to help continue the relegation fight, and possibly push the club on towards the top half.

Boing Boing

The halfway stage has been reached in season one for Murphy's Birmingham City and with 19 games completed the conclusion has to be that it's been an excellent start for the boys in blue. With a record of 12 wins, 2 draws and 5 defeats, Birmingham sit in unprecedented heights of 4th place in the English Premier League - six points ahead of our nearest rival - big spending Andy Nilsen's Blackburn Rovers.

Indeed the Birmingham fans are just coming down from the high of the perfect Christmas present. A thrilling victory at "the Goat's" Ewood Park achieved via a momentous comeback from three goals down with only half an hour to play..... The DVD of "Three nil down, Four - Three Up!" is expected to be one hot seller as Nilsen's troops and morale were battered on their own turf...

More good news is Birmingham's progress to the Carling Cup Semi Finals where a two-legged head to head against Wenger's Arsenal awaits. The quality in the Carling Cup semi finals is very high this season with Manchester United and Everton appearing in the other semi final...Very close to the Millenium and the chance of some silverware then...

Some recent games:

Birmingham 1 - 0 Tottenham, Birmingham 2 - 0 Tottenham

Two meetings in three days against Pagi's Spurs, one in the League and one in the Carling Cup saw two wins for Birmingham...Pagi is really struggling at Spurs which is a shame for one of the modern game's great gentlemen. I have to say that on both occasions Spurs could have won the game with better finishing and put in two very good performances. Both times, Birmingham just had a little extra composure in front of goal and that was enough to win the games. I'm hoping Pagi stays on at Spurs, cos with more experience a better manager will eventually emerge....

Liverpool 5 - 3 Birmingham

At this stage we were on a good run of eight games without defeat, but Anfield is a ground I don't like travelling to as Liverpool invariably get the result. Here I watched amazed as my side ran Liverpool ragged for 35 minutes, scoring three times and having an effort cleared off the line. However, before HT, the scousers had managed to pull two back through expert finishing by Spanish international Morientes. Despite doing everything I could to contain Liverpool in the second half, Morientes was unstoppable and ended up rattling home five goals as the scousers completed a great comeback. For us, a devastating result.

Birmingham 2 - 1 Aston Villa

The points in the first Midlands derby against Sam Bouchard's Aston Villa went to Birmingham in a tight, even, well contested derby, where Birmingham just did enough to secure the win. If all the games are as interesting as this one, Bouchard and I should have a lively rivalry....

Man City 1 - 2 Birmingham

Struggling Rick Boult's City look a doomed side at the minute and the Championship looks inevitable on this performance. Birmingham coasted to the win, with a late goal from City as consolation. Rick could stay up, but has he got the determination to try or does he only "sing when he's winning?" That's what the City fans need to know...

Birmingham 2 - 0 Portsmouth

Absent Jay's Pompey go down to mean Murphy has tasted victory against all human opponents with away trips to D'Ardenne and Nilsen to come.

Fulham 1 - 0 Birmingham

Mark's Fulham have been performing excellently this season and he has surpassed all early expectations of his managerial ability. With a comprehensive victory over the Goat already under his belt, I knew this would be a tough game. Fulham attacked early on with verve and style, especially from the two wing men, Malbranque and Boa Morte. As it was, Fulham took the lead from a poorly defended set piece, with Brian McBride scoring from close range. After that, Birmingham had some great chances and periods of play, but an outstanding performance from D'Ardenne's signing Espen Johnsen in the Londoners goal kept us out. In an even contest, D'Ardenne played a good game from the bench (even if a draw would have been a fair result), to record my first defeat to the Frenchman ever and my ambition of completing a set of al lthe human scalps destroyed...!!

Blackburn Rovers 3 - 4 Birmingham

Well the fixture list had kept us waiting all the way until the 28th December for the first head to head between Nilsen and Murphy, which is always one of the most hugely anticipated meetings of the season. With both bosses sitting in the top six, Murphy's side held a three point advantage going into the game, but I had been impressed by Blackburn's style in hammering Middlesbrough 4-0 in a scouting trip prior to the game.

Goatee Beard came into the match in attacking style as always. A 4-4-2 diamond with Petersen feeding the dangerous Kuqi up front, a player the Goat has been trying to offload all season. Fortunately, as both sides had played only two days earlier, Nilsen's best striker Cesar Delgado was on the bench.

Well I could go on for ages about this match and Goat will no doubt put in a very biased report later, but the facts were this. The game was very even before HT with Birmingham looking good, but Blackburn's finishing was superior and that had given them a 2-0 lead. After HT, Blackburn added another to make it 3-0 (again with Birmingham playing well) and I was starting to get concerned about a mauling. Then I remembered.

It is foolish to try to prevent Goats sides from scoring as they always do....But Goat's sides are usually sh1te at the back!! Replicating Goat's diamond for the last 30 minutes, we went for the jugular. As goal, after goal, after goal, and then GOALLLL!!! hit the back of Nilsen's net, I just sat there and grinned as the wails from the Blackburn bench got ever louder....You shut up!!!!!

Overall press reports were all in agreement that Birmingham had been the better side over the entire 90, but what a way to win the match....

So all has been good so far, Bury in the FA Cup 3rd Round await....can it possibly be as good in the second half of the season when I basically have 17 players...we await to see.....

Heskey, what a legend...

Season falls apart as morale hits an all time low!

Okay as you will have garnered by now, my season has in fact gone tits up, and im definitely up the proverbial creek without a paddle. Having gone on hols for a few games as i nipped out, my assistant Steve Kean proceeded to ruin my season in 2 games, quite an achievement i think we will all agree. The first game he took my lads to Goodison and was on the end of a 6-0 thrashing, i cant really tell you how the game panned out as i have not worked up the courage to check myself! Anyway as we all know morale is a crucial part in this latest installment of FM06, and im certainly learning that the hard way, with that heavy defeat still having a lasting affect over my teams performances, we have not played to our potential since my return.

However more grave than my league form, i think im around 10th but to be honest had more worrying things to think about other than league placement, is the prospect of going into administration. With my club losing some 850k a month, and the balance in the red at some 5 million, worrying times indeed at craven cottage, and i think the only way to avoid this is to sell off Diop,Boa Morte and Malbranque, hopefully for around £20million, to sort out my negative balance, and if funds are available to invest in a few young,cheap players to take their places. With the dip in form, and financial problems times are tough at Fulham but i hope to push through, and come out of it a better manager!

On to match reports however there will be a change in structure today; in that i will list the results and then talk about them after that, i fear my form must be seen to truly appreciate my crisis!

Fulham 2-1 Reading(league cup 4th round away)

Fulham 1-0 Birmingham(home)

Fulham 0-6 Everton(away)

Fulham 0-2 Arsenal(away)

Fulham 1-3 Arsenal(league cup quarter final)

Fulham 1-3 Chelsea(away)

Fulham 0-3 Wigan(home)

On the face of it, as Niall said, with the exception of Wigan, all the teams who beat me beat him, and to be honest are expected to get the points against me. However it was the manner of these defeats that upset me with my team easily surrendering goals and generally being second best throughout the game, something i could not accuse them of earlier in the season. To truly turn the knife i welcomed ET's Wigan side to Craven Cottage and a team i should be looking to take 3 points from, particularly at home, beat me 3-0, with performance perhaps a little improved, but still alot to be desired. I fear that is as detailed as the match reports will get as i look to the future and not the past as i attempt to improve morale, and get my team back on form.

However despite my doom and gloom report, i am currently meeting my season expectations, and my main season aims which were avoid relegation(not down yet) avoid administration(desperately bailing water) and beat Niall...which i managed to do.

So on the face of it December has been a rotten month for Fulham, but if we can recover our early season form and solve our financial crisis, then there is still some hope yet for this season and the future.

The badge again, damn it..talk about kicking a man when he's down

Disarray At The Park

After 6 weeks of mind games, scoring and being so close to coming somewhere respectable - Sounds like the Police statement about GOAT - Aston Villa have only themselves to blame after winning just one game in 6. Since the draw with high flying Fulham Bouchard's Aston Villa have gone ever so slightly downhill going out of the League Cup in just the second round and then having to endure the imbarrassing trip home after a 3-0 loss away from home to woeful Sunderland.

The season began away at Dave Williams' Charlton, who had bought very well and formed quite an interesting side with a defense that looked more solid than GOAT's schlong in a playground.

Premier League Game 1

Charlton:[2] Bothroyd, Sorondo

Aston Villa:[2] Barry(pen), Baros

Dave's side really put the pressure on first half, taking all opportunity's given to them and keeping the ball better than most could - creating chances and unfortunatly scoring them .

The same Villa side was sent out in the second half but they came onto the field unforfilled and performed to a standard much less than the first half, if it was at all possible! It took a spot of genius tactical changing with 15 minutes to go which brought about 2 away goals late on. A superb performance in the final 10 saw the game levelled and a completly different side. Williams could and probably should feel hard done by with only a point - however their solid defence looked a bit shakey with three men to deal with up there and they faulted. Full marks to Charlton, they just let it slip towards the end.

Premier League Game 2

Aston Villa:[3] Baros(2), Angel

Manchester City:[1] Bautista

I wish that i'd be able to say that Rick Boult was completly comitted to the cause for this game, however I can't! A 5-1 loss just 3 days prior must've had a fair amount of effect on the Manchester born boss.

Beyond Boult's lack of tactics Aston Villa shone on a day where they really needed to. Milan Baros scored two beautiful curler's whilst Angel netted from a near impossible angle. A truly sensational set of goals against at times a defiant City.

Premier League Game 3

Middlesbrough:[0]

Aston Villa:[1] Angel

Complete Boro domination for most of the game should've meant an easy win for the home side, however Angel turned up with 15 minutes to go and bagged a vital headed goal.

Villa have taken the league by the scruff of the neck, going top above Chelsea on goal difference.

Premier League Game 4

Aston Villa:[2] Baros(2)

Tottenham Hotspur:[0]

Injury threw Villa off course with both goalkeepers being injured somehow and Milan Baros being affected by a flu virus that he'd caught from International duty - Baros perked up a little to keep a place in the 16 if only just.

The game was fairly even, but with Spurs' array of talent on display and the knowledge of manager David Pagi's skills behind them all most people would've thought they'd been able to take Villa to the death before finishing them off, however their bark is bigger than their bite as they finished the game on a low note. The introduction of Milan Baros proved pivotal as he managed to score a header and then a beautiful chip over Robinson to secure all three points for the home side.

Fortunate...maybe, but the points are in the bag and Pagi's sent to the bottom of the league where he belongs .

On a serious note, the season has started well for Villa although saying that - it's bound to change....quite rapidly - only Fulham next though so...not quite yet!

More to follow...

http://www.premierleague.com/en/images/club_normallogos_180x160/astonvilla.gif

...More that was set to follow...

Premier League Game 5

Fulham:[1] John(Pen)

Aston Villa:[1] Baros

Two of the top teams in the EPL met at Craven Cottage aiming to inflict some damage on eachother, and that they did....fairly equally.

A push in the back gave Collins John a chance to level the game just 10 minutes after Baros gave Villa the lead. Much of the first half belonged to Fulham, with the French revolution aparently taking shape and standing tall, however the second half was the other way with Villa attacking chance after chance.

The game ended one a piece which was a fair result considering the contrasting halves, so the war betweeen French and English supremacy continues...

League Cup Round 2

Wolves:[1] Melberg(og), Seol, Cort

Aston Villa:[1] Angel

A midlands derby cropped up in the draw for the second round of the League Cup as high flying Wolves drew Villa at home. A youthful crop of players - bar a couple - were drafted in for this match and they were well and truly battered. Roasted like a prostitute on a bonfire.

Superb Wolves > Woeful Villa - Simple As

Premier League Game 6

Aston Villa:[2] Berger, Barry

Bolton:[1] Borgetti

Bolton vs Villa....Near The Top vs Near The Bottom....Big Sam vs Medium-ish built Sam...TV Gold in the making .

This was actually a very good game as Bolton took it to the league leaders well and actually took the lead and held it solidly for 20 minutes. Unfortunatly a very large kick up the arse from the home team manager ensured a decent comeback from his side. 2 goals in 9 minutes was a highlight from the game and really opitomised Villa's second half performance. Quick, acurate and very high quality. All in all, a good day .

...More to come...

Double whammy for Birmingham.

With Birmingham flying high in 4th place in the league table and into the semi finals of the Carling Cup, the midlands outfit was dealt a huge blow when details emerged that on loan defensive midfielder Jari Jarosik has sustained a broken leg in a training ground incident. With Murphy's squad already suffering from long term injuries to the likes of Jamie Clapham, Tobias Hysen and with David Dunn being injury prone, this blow puts a further strain on the team's already fully stretched resources. Latest news is that Jarosik, who Murphy described as "an integral part of the side" has returned to Chelsea for treatment by a specialist.

We caught up with Murphy this morning,

"Niall, the loss of Jarosik, what's your reaction?"

Well I got to admit that I'm deeply upset by the loss of such an influential player. Jari was instrumental in our successful season so far and to lose him is a huge blow. We wish him all the best for his recovery."

"What's the plan now then?"

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Well I'm actively looking in the market for a replacement, but with only 10 days to go until the window shuts it could be difficult to get the right player in at this late stage. We'll have to see what develops and who, if anyone, comes onto the market. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

In a further blow to Birmingham, the news that all fans feared but had hoped would not arise given the clubs attempts to qualify for Europe next season came to fruition today. It is emerged that Birmingham's best central defender Matthew Upson will join champions elect Arsenal in a Bosman move this July. This comes as a huge blow to Murphy who had attempted to offer Upson the most lucrative contract in Birmingham history to persuade the defender to stay at the club. The player though is believed to have wanted guaranteed European football next season and jumped at the chance to reunite with Arsene Wenger, the man who originally brought him into top flight football....

Murphy stated,

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Well this is a huge loss to the club because Matthew has been absolutely outstanding this season. Wenger has got himself a top defender, positionally sound, brilliant in the tackle and of course possessing that pace to recover positions. I'm really disappointed that Upson is leaving as it gives me a headache now trying to replace him in the summer. He will be a very difficult player to replace. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Better news for Birmingham is that leading scorer Mikael Forssell has committed himself to the club until 2011 after signing a £35,000K per week five year contract. The Finnish international has been in great form for the club this season and Murphy was known to be keen to tie him down to an extended stay at St Andrews. It appears that Forssell has a similar faith in Murphy's ability to bring the best out of him. This reporter feels that makes him a very wise man indeed.

Results….

League Cup 3rd Rd

Sunderland 3

Elliott 26 Stead 28 Gray 79

West Ham 1

Holm 71

Man of the Match: Stead 8/10

Attendance-30479

Refereed by Graham Poll

Sunderland seems a little overrated on this game and with my squad down to the bare bones I didn’t hold out much hope. The injuries were so bad at this point that I had to play a defender in midfield. A quick fire double from Sunderland gave them a two goal lead until Holm popped up with a header to give us some hope only for Gray to seal the victory for Sunderland. 3-1 Defeat

Premiership Game 11

West Ham 1

Camara 45

Chelsea 0

Man of the Match: Cohen 8/10 West Ham

Attendance-35583

Refereed by Uriah Rennie

My best result so far on Football manager online 2006 was against the mighty Chelsea team. With Chelsea having much of the attack, only some fine defending from Davenport and Anton saved us. Mark Noble was again superb in the middle of the park passing and tackling alike. Camara is very hit or miss at the moment but in this game he was unstoppable scoring right at the stroke of half time and then making another few good chance by himself only for there goalkeeper to save. 1-0 Win

Premiership Game 12

Wigan 1

Robert 41

West Ham 0

Man of the Match: Ochoa 8/10 Wigan

Attendance-24964

Refereed by Uriah Rennie

With ET/Ben off flying his spaceship around the solar system before phoning home to his parents I was up against another assistant manager of a human club. After the Chelsea game my morale was high and the players were up for another win but unfortunately so was ETs goalkeeper who kept out all of my efforts on goal winning the man of the match award along the way. I really should have at least got a point out of this game and maybe all 3 if ET had turned up but that’s the story of the season so far. 1-0 Defeat

Premiership Game 13

Middlesbrough 1

Giannakopoulos 62

West Ham 1

Noble 89

Man of the Match: Davenport 8/10 West Ham

Attendance-20479

Refereed by Uriah Rennie

This was another even game with nothing to separate the teams in the first half. Second half and the Boro sprung to life with Giannakopoulos heading the ball from the corner to give them the lead. With Boro in command of the game there manager changed to a defensive formation which seemed to give West Ham the upper hand having more attacks on goal. Then finally Mark Noble was able to make the pressure tell with a well worked goal with the help of a fine Yossi Benayoun cross. 1-1 Draw

Premiership Game 14

West Ham 1

Vitti 34

Newcastle 2

Owen 10, 14

Man of the Match: Owen 8/10 Newcastle

Attendance-29939

Refereed by Dermot Gallagher

The main difference on this game was the finishing with Michael Owen on top form scoring a trade mark goal for the first and a second that shouldn’t have found its way into the back of the net from the angle he shot from. After the second half I changed the formation around this brought a better performance for West Ham. Vitti scored his first League goal for the club and Holm had two good chances to level the game.

2-1 Defeat

Premiership Game 15

WBA 0

West Ham 0

Man of the Match: Albrechtsen 9/10 WBA

Attendance-30479

Refereed by Graham Poll

A bore draw said it all at the end of the match but in to be honest WBA had the best of the chances to score but Hislop was more than up for the challenge. Mullins really should have given us an underserved 3 points late on after a one on one with the goalkeeper he only managed to hit the post. 0-0- Draw

Premiership Game 16

West Ham 0

Charlton 0

Man of the Match: Hreidarsson 8/10 Charlton

Attendance-35567

Refereed by Steve Bennett

With my old mate slim taking the night off I came up against a better tactical manager in the form of his assistant . In truth this game could have gone either way with both sides having chances to score but neither did. 0-0- Draw

Premiership Game 17

Man City 2

Cole 36 Kamburov 48

West Ham 0

Sent off: Danny Mills 1st Minute

Man of the Match: /10 Man City

Attendance-43709

Refereed by Dermot Gallagher

This was s big six pointer against Rick Boults Manchester City who was AWOL for this match. What can I say I was ****ed after the 1st minute when Danny Mills got a straight and deserved red card for bring down a Man City player but to my surprise West Ham still played the better football in this match creating the most chances and generally playing the better football. With David James (off all people) getting a 10 out of 10 for most of the match and City scoring with there only 2 shots on goal this was never going to be my night and just summed up my luck at the moment 2-0 Defeat

West Ham in truth isn’t actually playing that bad at the moment but we haven’t had any kind of luck in any game. No penalties for us only against, No red cards for the other team only red cards for West Ham. A few vital goals ruled out when they clearly wasn’t offside Don’t get me wrong there have been games when the Hammers just didn’t show up like against Birmingham, Aston Villa, WBA and Arsenal but with a little rub of the green we could have at another 10 points at least.

More to follow soon

Baggies improvement continues

With West Brom continuing to move up the league, and an FA Cup victory over the mighty Liverpool in the bag, it's been a Happy New Year down at the Hawthorns.

But firstly, transfer news:

OUT

At last, the biggest earners have left the club, providing some more money to spend and easing the monthly loss of cash.

Kanu £1m to Brondby

His £100k p/m wage is finally off the books

Darren Moore £100k to Barnsley

Russell Hoult £200k to Celtic

Mike Strutter £50k to Accrington

Jarrad Hodgkiss £22k to Chesterfield

Kevin Campbell £6k to Barnsley

Martin Albrechtsen £1.2m to Crystal Palace

Ronnie Wallwork £750k to Norwich

So well over £3million earned, putting the club back into the black and giving plenty of transfer funds to strengthen the squad. Some of it has already been spent:

Jonas Johansen - D/AMC - Free from Tromso

Versatile 20 year old Swede, good back up for the side

Jonatan Berg - AMR - Free from IFK

Another 20 year old Swede, again will provide competition for places

Andrew Sinkala - D/DMR - £500k from Koln

26 year old Zambian international, who when fit will become 1st choice RB

Pontus Wernblom - DMC - £700k from IFK

Really pleased to get this 19 year old Swede, who's got all the credentials to become a superstar. Already cementing a place in the starting 11

So with £2million made in the transfer window so far, there's still some funds available to strengthen the squad further. Watch this space

Now, onto the matches:

WBA 3-0 Spurs

In what proved to be one of Pagi's final matches, his team were put to the sword by West Brom in the 1st hour. It was 2-0 at half time, Koumas (3, 23) scoring them both. Scimeca(61) scored his 1st of the season just after the hour to wrap up the points and heap more misery on the hapless Spurs boss.

Liverpool 2-1 WBA

2 days later Anfield was the venue as West Brom slipped to defeat in a close encounter. Morientes (17) and Zenden (57) put the home side 2 up, before Ellington (86) gave WBA a glimmer of hope. Despite more pressure Liverpool hung on. But revenge is a dish best served immediately...

FA Cup 3rd Round: WBA 3-1 Liverpool

West Brom were up for this game after feeling hard done by in the league game just days earlier. The lads got off to a great start when Ellington (4) fired home, only for Sinama Pongolle (32) to equalise from close range. But just before the break Horsfield (44) nodded home, giving the Baggies the upper hand going into half time. The second half belonged to the home side, and when Scimeca (58) got the 3rd, the game was effectively over. A great result, setting up a home tie with local rivals Wolves in the 4th round.

Fulham 0-2 WBA

With Monsieur D'Ardenne off tending to his broken motorcycle, his side were dispatched with ease by a confident West Brom side. From the moment Ellington (2) gave the Baggies an early lead, Fulham were always on the back foot. Volz was sent off for a cynical professional foul, and it was up to that goal machine Scimeca (90), with his 3rd in 4 games, to wrap up the points.

Upto 13th in the league and only 4 points off 8th, things are looking brighter at the Hawthorns. With a 4th round tie at home to Wolves to come, the 2nd half of the season could prove to be a successful one.

Boing Boing

Results….

Premiership Game 18

West Ham 1

Noble 4

Aston Villa 4

Hendrie 2,25 Bouma 41 Whittingham 59

Man of the Match: Hendrie 10/10 Aston Villa

Attendance-35583

Refereed by Uriah Rennie

This was my biggest defeat of the season to date. West Ham was no match for Villa as there free flowing football destroyed us. Sam has really got his team playing well with his new formation and I expect them to finish in the top 6 after this display. 4-1 Defeat

Premiership Game 19

Liverpool 2

Diao 36 Amoruso og 81

West Ham 1

Camara 18

Man of the Match: Noble 8/10 West Ham

Attendance-32685

Refereed by Uriah Rennie

It was again another match when will should have won but for a crap ref and some more bad luck. West Ham took the game to Liverpool in the first half scoring first via Camara then getting a perfectly good goal ruled out for offside . Diao decided to get his first goal of the season against us and with West Ham on the attack Zenden breaks free down the wing with the ball at his feet delivering a harmless cross which Amoruso decides to header the ball into his own net with no pressure being on him . 2-1 Defeat

Premiership Game 20

West Ham 1

Benayoun pen 53

Fulham 4

John 11 Malbranque 26 Braind 82 Morte 87

Sent Off: Davenport 74 minute

Man of the Match: Diop 10/10 Fulham

Attendance-35579

Refereed by Uriah Rennie

This was a poor, poor performance by West Ham as we rolled over and died on the pitch against a good Fulham team. My old friend Rob Styles again gave one of my players a red card which didn’t help the cause, so that 2 games played against Mark this season and neither time did I finish with 11 men. Well done to Mark as he got his Fulham team playing some good stuff out on the pitch. 4-1 Defeat

Premiership Game 22

Tottenham 3

Defoe 30 Rosiak 67 Keane 72

West Ham 1

Benayoun 22

Man of the Match: Lennon 9/10 West Ham

Attendance-36212

Refereed by Steve Bennett

This was a battle at the bottom clash which saw Tottenham that on West Ham at White Hart Lane. I not just saying this but I’m really surprised that Spurs find themselves at the bottom of the table with the players they have in there squad. Benayoun is finally starting to find his shooting boots but I’m afraid its to late with the team on such poor morale they can’t even seem to pass the ball anyone without losing possession. Despite taking the lead via Benayoun Tottenham was the better team in this encounter and was worthy of the 3 points. I can still see both me and Spurs going down despite Tottenham winning this game. 3-1 Defeat

FA Cup 3rd Rd

West Ham 0

Benayoun 42 Priskin 81

Huddersfield 0

Man of the Match: Davenport 8/10 West Ha,

Attendance-19190

Refereed by Colin Webster

A good home tie against a lower league team is what I needed to get morale back on track so unlike some managers in EPL I pick my best team for this match and my lads didn’t disappoint. A goal in each half from Benayoun and Priskin gave me the victory I needed with Huddersfield never really troubling me. I have been drawn against Middlesbrough who are currently the best form team within the premiership so I guess that’s the end of the road in the cup for me. 4-1 Defeat

Premiership Game 23

Bolton 3

Haim pen 19 pen 28 Jaidi 40

West Ham 0

Sent off: Konchesky 22 minute

Man of the Match: Haim 10/10 Bolton

Attendance-25423

Refereed by Rob Styles

Rob Styles is a ****ing joke. He was on FM05 and again on FM06. I have no comment about this match other that Rob Styles is a ****ing joke.

Rob Styles what a joke

Danny King today made an official complaint against referee Rob Styles who he described as "crap" after West Ham 3-0 defeat by Bolton. Styles was widely criticised following Saturday's Premiership clash at Reebok for giving Bolton two dubious penalty decision and dismissing Paul Konchesky.

King said:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Three ridiculous decisions in the first half cost us. I am going to tell the assessor that I thought it was an inept performance. I understand referees get it wrong sometimes and I understand that, but you can't give a penalty for no apparent reason twice.

At every Premiership match, there is an official overseeing refereeing standards who routinely canvasses managers' opinions after the game. I would not be surprised if nothing happened. I will probably get into trouble for saying that, but I don't care. When I get the phone call from the assessor I will tell him what I think. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

King called Styles "crap" in the post-match press conference and his furious reaction could spark a separate Football Association disrepute charge. An FA spokesman confirmed that the governing body is giving his comments "due consideration".

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Rob Styles is a ****ing joke. He was on FM05 and again on FM06. I have no comment about this match other that Rob Styles is a ****ing joke. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Definite pens imo.

24th August 2005

Wigan 4

Viduka 30, Francis 37, 66, Roberts 90

Portsmouth 1

Lua Lua 47

Although a tough match on paper, my players performed brilliantly to impressively win against Jay's Pompey team. I'm hoping it's not just a one-off as we need these kind of results to secure our premiership status.

27th August 2005

Blackburn 1

Johnson 11

Wigan 2

Eriksen og37, og90

A superb game of football against Goat's Blackburn team who seems to be reviving the Keegan style of all out attack and totally forgetting about the defensive side of things . I'd like to give special thanks to defender Eriksen for finishing off our moves so well to secure all the points in the end .

10th September 2005

Wigan 1

Connolly 50

Man Utd 3

Scholes 33, Park 44, Ronaldo 72

Man Utd look unstoppable as they completely tore apart my team with the terrorising pace of both Ronaldo and Rooney which we had no answer for. They look likely for the title this season if they carry on playing like this.

17th September 2005

Birmingham 2

Heskey 45, Tebily 84

Wigan 0

With Niall bemoaning his lack of funds and any decent players before the season began, it was obviously a load of tosh as they looked pretty damn good to me. Never managed to get into the match as Heskey and Tebily both scored to secure the points for our illustrious EPL host (He paid me to say that!!! ).

League Cup 2nd Round

21st September 2005

Wigan 5

Gaven 29, 54, 67, Roberts 70, Bullard 90

Leeds 2

Healy 45, Hulse 80

After the poor showing against Niall's Birmingham side, I decided to let the team go all out attack and take

the game to Leeds. The team turned in a great performance as we demolished them 5-2 with Gaven scoring an impressive hat-trick as he showed why he's going to be a top player in the Wigan side for years to come.

24th September 2005

Wigan 3

Viduka 10, 15, 51

Everton 2

Beattie 28, 46

With Everton performing well, this was a great result with Viduka scoring a tremendous hat-trick as he continues to justify his 2.5m transfer fee with top class performances.

1st October 2005

Arsenal 2

Van Persie 5, Reyes 16

Wigan 0

Stood no chance in this match as Henry ran the show. Van Persie and Reyes scored in the first 20 minutes and

we never looked like getting back into the match.

15th October 2005

Wigan 0

Chelsea 0

23rd October 2005

Middlesbrough 4

Maccarone 20, Yakubu 65, 90, Mendieta 79

Wigan 3

Gaven 8, Viduka 40, Kavanagh 82

With my defence deciding to go on holiday during the match, the rest of the players couldn't score enough to cover up for their mistakes as Middlesbrough had a field day scoring 4 goals and could have scored 8.

League Cup 3rd Round

26th October 2005

Wigan 0

Southampton 1

Prutton 49

The less said about this game the better as Southampton won thanks to a Prutton goal. Not happy with my side

and let them know in no uncertain terms after the game that I won't stand for this kind of performance.

29th October 2005

Newcastle 3

Shearer 24, Parker 28, Ameobi 80

Wigan 1

Viduka 86

5th November 2005

Wigan 1

Roberts 41

West Ham 0

Another game where my capable assistant pulled off a win against Danny's West Ham side. Ochoa was MOTM as he

kept the Hammers at bay for the whole game and is looking well worth the money spent on him.

26th November 2005

Wigan 3

Roberts 5, 22, Viduka 41

Charlton 3

Jardel 21, 25, Murphy 62

With me being away, another game that my assistant took charge of but a point's a point so it's happy days .

30th November 2005

West Brom 3

Ellington 1, 16, Earnshaw 50

Wigan 2

Kavanagh pen 9, Roberts 72

Coming up against Ligs for the first time ever in EPL history, I wasn't sure what to expect. At the end of a

entertaining game, we ended up on the wrong side of a 3-2 win with Lig's team looking impressive so it looks like he'll do quite well this season.

3rd December 2005

Man City 1

Kamburov 68

Wigan 0

With Rick's Man City team really underachieving, I thought we'd have a good chance of getting at least a draw

but with the strikers hitting a blank for once, Kamburov scored the only goal to wrap up the win for Rick.

10th December 2005

Wigan 1

Francis 28

Aston Villa 1

Baros 32

Sam is having a good season with the Villans so far and so was a bit apprehensive before the game. It turned

out to be a pretty boring game with a draw being a far outcome in the end so I needn't have worried.

26th December 2005

Wigan 2

Mahon 27, Gaven 36

Tottenham 0

Coming up against a seriously underachieving Spurs team (Pagi's managing them so it's no surprise ), I was confident that if the players put in a good performance that it would be enough to get a win. Mahon and Gaven secured the points with two good finishes.

28th December 2005

Fulham 1

McBride 72

Wigan 3

Viduka 20, Roberts 40, 65

With Frenchy's Fulham having a bad run before this game, my players did me proud with an impressive performance

against one of the better teams in the league despite their recent form. A goal from Viduka and two from Roberts was enough to secure the win but disappointed we couldn't manage a clean sheet against a ineffective Fulham frontline but still one of the easier games this season .

2nd January 2006

Wigan 2

Roberts 5, Viduka 90

Sunderland 1

Murphy 28

After losing 3-2 at the Stadium Of Light to Sunderland who ran rings round us that day, we got our revenge as the players put in a good performance although we did leave it late to secure the win with Viduka scoring in

the 90th minute with a well-taken goal.

4th January 2006

Bolton 2

Davies 46, 73

Wigan 1

Viduka 25

Although Bolton won 2-1, this is a game where we really should have won as we created plenty of chances but

just couldn't put the ball in the net, but can still take positives from the amount of chances we created in the end.

FA Cup 3rd Round

7th January 2006

Wigan 0

Reading 0

Dominated the game but strikers just couldn't finish off the chances being created for them. So we'll have to go to Reading now and try and get a good result to keep us in the cup as i'd like to have a good cup run.

11th January 2006

Liverpool 1

Alonso 63

Wigan 0

Didn't think I'd get anything out of this game which turned out to be right as Alonso scored to secure the win

for Liverpool but we can be happy as they should have scored more than one goal so the defence put in a good

performance.

14th January 2006

Porstmouth 3

Mbesuma 23, Lua Lua 86, 87

Wigan 5

Mokoena 14, Gaven 45, Commons 58, Kavanagh 80, pen 90

With Jay being away and his assistant in charge, I was confident of getting at least a point to help push us

up the league. The match was a real end to end game and we looked impressive as we got ourselves 4-1 up but

Lua Lua scored two off counter-attacks to make it 4-2 to get the nerves going but Kavanagh slammed home a penalty to confirm all three points in the end.

FA Cup 3rd Round Replay

18th January 2006

Reading 1

Convey 36

Wigan 2

Gaven 8, Viduka 58

A potentially tricky cup replay away at Reading was comfortably won in the end with goals coming from Gaven

and Viduka. Man Utd away in the next round awaits so that'll probably be the end of any potential cup run .

Report Stats

Played - 24

Won - 10

Drawn - 4

Lost - 10

Scored - 39

Conceded - 36

I think I'll be trying to more regularly update as I've got cramp in my wrist from having to talk about 24 matches in total .

We're currently on 30 points after 20 odd games of the season but we'll still need at least another 10 points to have definitely secured our premiership status then we can look to push on from there to hopefully finish somewhere near mid-table.