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How do others overcome wife hate when playing FM?

My wife is getting narky that I am playing FM too much even though I am lucky to play 1 hr a day, it is driving me crazy. She is quite happy to spend hours staring at Facebook and chatting to friends or commenting on peoples posts/pictures, but as soon as I try to play a little FM I get wife attack. She thinks I obsess over it too much by reading forums, watching YouTube, reading internet articles when I am not playing.

I think the crux of the problem is she thinks I am too old to be playing computer games, she just doesn't understand the allure of computer games as she was too busy studying in her younger years.

Anyone else have similar problems? All I want to do is get Sheffield United back to the premier league :(

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Her working schedule might be heavy.

You should praise her more if appopriate.

Build good relationships with her family.

Or maybe a better marriage contract.

And yes I play FM too much :lol:

 

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Tell her to do one,i always seem to find that works out well from a personal point of view  :D

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Sit her down and have a conversation explaining why it's important to you. If you can't communicate with your wife, you're going to have problems sooner or later. Say it's your free time, it relaxes you and you enjoy it. I wouldn't 'attack' her pastimes of Facebook unless you want a blazing row.

Failing that, find someone more understanding! ;)

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Problem with wife not liking him playing too much FM.

Asks what to do on FM forum.

She's a lucky woman.

Edited by Craigus89

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Talk about all the benefits of FM.

- It keeps you knocking about the house and always available still to talk, do things needed etc. Unlike if you were say in a Sunday league team.

- It's vastly cheaper than things like going down the pub for an hour or two, or bowling once a week etc.

- It's a very quiet and so you can be playing it in near silence as she watches TV/goes on facebook.

- If you're at home playing FM you'll be too distracted to consider an affair or such.

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Have a conversation with her in FM style:

[Assertive] I am your boss and you should start to respect my decision

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My girlfriend doesn't play computer games at all so doesn't even understand what I am doing on the computer!

Fortunately her friend sent over season 6 of the walking dead which I have already seen so she can watch that whilst I play FM at least for the next few weeks.  Just need to get all of Game of Thrones now (except the latest one which I have not seen...)

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Transfer window's still open - you have time to get a new one in.

 

Wives come and go; FM is for ever. I've had 3 long-term relationships since discovering FM. My current one, 11 years now, encourages me to play. The way she sees it I don't go out and waste money on booze and birds. She's a keeper.

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One of the fundamentals of me agreeing to any sort of relationship is 'FM, will be played, like it or lump it' they are fully aware of the fact that this is a part of my life, one of my hobbies and ways of chilling out. If they do not accept this, there is no future for us and so it fails at the first step.

I would never attempt nor want to stop anybody's happiness in whatever they choose.

Should not be afraid to say how it is in any walk of life. Stand up for what you want/believe.

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1 hour ago, santy001 said:

- It keeps you knocking about the house and always available still to talk, do things needed etc.

This is crucial in my opinion. Yes, you're playing a video game, but it's one played at your own pace where you're constantly available for anything that might come up in the household; do a chore, go somewhere quickly (like to the shop), help with kids/pets or simply talk to her while she's relaxing playing Candy Crush or whatever.

 It'd be entirely different story if you played a game like online FPS with headset on, which takes your full attention for hours.

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I think it's terrible how some of you guys treat your other halves...

Oh, what do i do you say? Simple. Tell her i'm looking at a surprise for her so she's not allowed to look at the screen or else she will ruin it.

:brock:

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No team talk required tonight, Sheffield United carried on. I even got encouragement saying that I can show her brothers FM next time we visit her family as they love football.

We will see what tomorrow brings!

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My wife doesn't understand why I play FM, as she's not remotely a football fan. Nor does she understand why I watch people play it on Youtube or Twitch.

I don't get any aggro, though.

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20 minutes ago, Powermonger said:

No team talk required tonight, Sheffield United carried on. I even got encouragement saying that I can show her brothers FM next time we visit her family as they love football.

We will see what tomorrow brings!

That's the other great unknown - the fickle nature:one day your spending too much, the next day thats ok, my brothers love football! Sometimes you have to take it day by day. I always find that a giving her glass of fizzy and some choccies, her fav programme on a Friday night helps. Gives you credit in the FM bank during the following week. Though depending on her mood that credit can last or go quickly - sigh.

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Damn, this forum needs "Like"-buttons. So many wonderful answers, reactions and quips here I want to reward.

I guess there's a certain social view on pasttimes which is heavily biased and distorted by social norms: "Games" are, by some people, seen as "bad pasttimes", because they are ranked as "useless". Or at least childish pasttimes. Funnily enough, playing FM is probably enhancing your brain activity much more than watching a real football match.

In my opinion, it should be clear that, within a partnership, both should have the right to do with their leisure time whatever they want. Leisure time is important. Sometimes you need to think of other things than work, family and the problems of life. That being said, if pursuing hobbies leads to neglecting time with spouses, you're doing something wrong. And, well, we all know that FM does have a certain potential for just-one-more-week!!!-situations, right?

But in the end, if FM makes you happy, your wife should be happy that you are happy. It's a simple as that.

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5 minutes ago, Jean-Luc said:

Damn, this forum needs "Like"-buttons.

There's a big upvote button on the right.

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Just now, HUNT3R said:

There's a big upvote button on the right.

Hahaha... I thought that's the "Back to the top of the page"-button! :D

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My wife is totally cool about it. She knows im addicted to the game and will play in all my free time where i can. As long as i dont ignore the kids too much and spend a little tim some nights with her, i can play it as much as i want. :)

She tried to get into it around FM10 time but found it too complicated so she is happy for me to play it for her ha ha

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I may have missed the answer to this, but are you playing on a laptop or a desktop? If it's a desktop in another room, solutions will be hard to come by...

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6 hours ago, Lenzar said:

My wife doesn't understand why I play FM, as she's not remotely a football fan. Nor does she understand why I watch people play it on Youtube or Twitch.

I don't get any aggro, though.

I also don't understand why some play FM on YouTube or Twitch..

With regards to the OP, it's all about balance, compromise and give 'n' take. Which is what all relationships need to thrive. Communication is key though, as other have pointed out.

One piece of advice, if your partner doesn't football or 'gaming' then don't try and get them involved more. Leave that for places like this where people care about your latest FM conquest!

Edited by daniellewis_789

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Currently sat on sofa browsing this forum and playing fm with the mrs next to me watching tv.. it works fine

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I think it could make a real difference if you have the best pay-tv film channels and things like Netflix subscribed. You could both spend time in season four.

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I know this issue. She says I play too much but at the same time devotes effort and time into things I would never think of. Try to explain that it is how you like to spend your free time and that it helps you to be relaxed and calm. Focus on the football part and less on the video game part, I think it is easier for her to understand your affection for football. I think that one does not need to understand what the other one does in their free time but one needs to respect it. Women often seem to seek an "urge to further oneself" in a male partner. Men who set themselves goals, are active, do projects. Maybe you can do something in that department if you're not on FM?

Edited by bezarkane

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Thankfully my wife played the early years of FM, in fact we started going out around the time FM06 was dwindling and FM07 was set to be released so we both bought it. We never played online however sat in the same room at times playing and would often compare successes. FM08 came out and we both surprised each other with a copy lol

It was around 2010 or 2011 she lost a little interest and focused more on house and wedding stuff. Now that we have 2 children aged 4 and 18 months she chooses not to play any more and I do believe she simply wonders why or how i find the time to play. Simple. She goes to bed I play till 11pm ish. I make sure it does not effect the childrens time with me in any way at all. Yes I wish I could play all day but I had to accept that a long time ago!

She sometimes says I should be too old to play it or at least has a way of saying it without muttering the exact words but I simply say I could be out getting drunk or spending time out and about but I would much rather play FM. Its what I want to do and its far better than MIC or only way is essex or whatever its called.....

 

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4 hours ago, withnail316 said:

I may have missed the answer to this, but are you playing on a laptop or a desktop? If it's a desktop in another room, solutions will be hard to come by...

Yes I am playing on a PC in my office, however she can and usually does use her laptop in the same room or we talk to each other from the office to the lounge area where she sits and uses her phone/laptop or reading a book. She is not big on watching TV. It's not like I am locked away and uncommunicative.

Even if I had a laptop and played on that it would still be contentious, probably even more so because I would be more mobile and play it more.

Anyway, next time I receive some heat I'll explain it is my wind down time and hobby.

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17 hours ago, Powermonger said:

Anyway, next time I receive some heat I'll explain it is my wind down time and hobby.

This line is the important part in all this. Its a hobby and a pretty cheap one at that.  Everyone should have a hobby, so long as it doesn't turn into an obsession.

 

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My wife left the house at midday...her parting words..."could you put the shed up" (been in the box in the garden for six weeks).  My response; "no worries, I'll do it now" putting on my DIY clobber as she prepared to leave.

Before her car had pulled out of the driveway...I was already at my PC, loading FM.

6 hours later my arse has not left the seat, the shed is still I the box!

Not sure what my excuse should be...

- They did not put instructions in the box

- Not enough nails

- too windy to put a shed up

Any suggestions?

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1 hour ago, cpfcfm2009 said:

My wife left the house at midday...her parting words..."could you put the shed up" (been in the box in the garden for six weeks).  My response; "no worries, I'll do it now" putting on my DIY clobber as she prepared to leave.

Before her car had pulled out of the driveway...I was already at my PC, loading FM.

6 hours later my arse has not left the seat, the shed is still I the box!

Not sure what my excuse should be...

- They did not put instructions in the box

- Not enough nails

- too windy to put a shed up

Any suggestions?

Waterlogged pitch?

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1 hour ago, cpfcfm2009 said:

My wife left the house at midday...her parting words..."could you put the shed up" (been in the box in the garden for six weeks).  My response; "no worries, I'll do it now" putting on my DIY clobber as she prepared to leave.

Before her car had pulled out of the driveway...I was already at my PC, loading FM.

6 hours later my arse has not left the seat, the shed is still I the box!

Not sure what my excuse should be...

- They did not put instructions in the box

- Not enough nails

- too windy to put a shed up

Any suggestions?

Dont know how to break it to you but that sounds like game over, burnt toast. Expect divorce papers upon that kitchen table in the morning!

On the plus side after that all blows over its FM all weekend and evenings :)

 

Edited by JR866Gunner

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2 hours ago, cpfcfm2009 said:

My wife left the house at midday...her parting words..."could you put the shed up" (been in the box in the garden for six weeks).  My response; "no worries, I'll do it now" putting on my DIY clobber as she prepared to leave.

Before her car had pulled out of the driveway...I was already at my PC, loading FM.

6 hours later my arse has not left the seat, the shed is still I the box!

Not sure what my excuse should be...

- They did not put instructions in the box

- Not enough nails

- too windy to put a shed up

Any suggestions?

Tell her the instructions were in Chinese and hope she doesn't ask to see them. 

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My girlfriend doesn't complain about it. She understands (and she's kinda curious about the game and I can teach her about football and stuff), even if I'm playing for 4 hours straight. 

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Good job I haven't got a girlfriend if I did have one she would have to have the same interests in me like football and gaming (and support the same team as don't want like a Macclesfield, FC United or a Burnley fan as a girlfriend) 

Edited by stockportguy86

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3 hours ago, cpfcfm2009 said:

My wife left the house at midday...her parting words..."could you put the shed up" (been in the box in the garden for six weeks).  My response; "no worries, I'll do it now" putting on my DIY clobber as she prepared to leave.

Before her car had pulled out of the driveway...I was already at my PC, loading FM.

6 hours later my arse has not left the seat, the shed is still I the box!

Not sure what my excuse should be...

- They did not put instructions in the box

- Not enough nails

- too windy to put a shed up

Any suggestions?

3 hours and no updates. i can only assume he's dead, or he's been hastily putting up a shed! :lol: 

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17 minutes ago, PleasedToMichu said:

3 hours and no updates. i can only assume he's dead, or he's been hastily putting up a shed! :lol: 

Half correct. He is dead and now the wife is putting up the shed over his buried body. :D

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I haven't encountered this problem. My girl friend understands my gaming habits and knows it's good to have things of your own. I have gaming, and she has her crafts.

As long as you balance out the play time and spending time with her, there shouldn't be a problem.

Playing FM is a hobby just like any other. 

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13 hours ago, apsychoshow said:

My girlfriend doesn't complain about it. She understands (and she's kinda curious about the game and I can teach her about football and stuff), even if I'm playing for 4 hours straight. 

My girl friend get curious over the finances of my club. She's an accountant so anything number related she immediately drawn too. 

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My wife reminded me there is a 20% discount on FM for me and asked when I'm buying it today. 

So I don't get the wife hate.

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18 hours ago, cpfcfm2009 said:

My wife left the house at midday...her parting words..."could you put the shed up" (been in the box in the garden for six weeks).  My response; "no worries, I'll do it now" putting on my DIY clobber as she prepared to leave.

Before her car had pulled out of the driveway...I was already at my PC, loading FM.

6 hours later my arse has not left the seat, the shed is still I the box!

Not sure what my excuse should be...

- They did not put instructions in the box

- Not enough nails

- too windy to put a shed up

Any suggestions?

I don't know but when you do build it, make it cosy. I can see you being banished to it many many times!

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No problems here. Mrs Matrix316 is very understanding. All about a good game/wife/kids balance and an ability to compromise.

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20 minutes ago, monkeywool said:

My wife reminded me there is a 20% discount on FM for me and asked when I'm buying it today. 

So I don't get the wife hate.

Hmmm would you like to swap? :D

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2 minutes ago, Powermonger said:

Hmmm would you like to swap? :D

That sort of thing is on a whole different type of forum! :D

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My girlfriend isn't bothered by it at all, gives her a chance to get on the Playstation for hours while I'm upstairs getting an FM-marathon in.

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