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DavidMiller

Football Manager: The Commandments.

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Bringing this back. Thou shalt always instruct thy team when losing in the last 5 minutes to go route one, overload. - All or Nothing.

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Thou shalt never listen to your Ass man, even though he has very good stats etc he talks a load or sheite.

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Thou shall buy or loan a player if a player in a key position should be sold, if not you'll suffer a barrage of injuries in that slot that hampers your campaign.

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Thou shalt always lose the next match after being named manager of the month............

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Thou shall always look at the linesman immediately after scoring a goal, to prevent oneself from being excited before an offside is ruled.

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Thou shalt search the 6 months remaining on contract list on January 1st

Thou shalt ask thy ass man to quick pick the squad... Then make the changes you wanted anyway.

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Thou shalt always sign Balanta, Romero and Odergaard when managing a good team.

Thou shalt always go route one and overload when losing a game.

Thou shalt always release fringe players who demand first team football.

Thou shalt always sack staff with poor stats when ariving at a new club, looking to get at least 4 stars on every training category.

Thou shalt always demand the board invest in new training, youth facilities, increase junior coaching budget and looking for a feeder team.

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Thou shalt always put a timer on when playing online (because we all know that ONE guy who takes forever!)

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Thou shalt always blame a poor run of form on the fact that you saved when you were on a good run and that offended the FM Gods, hence the bad run

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Thou shalt never exit Football Manager, as closing Football Manager ruins your form.

Thou shalt not lie. Thou have been told multiple times on multiple threads that this is a complete myth. Thou shalt cease at once.

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Thou shalt always appoint Rene Meulensteen as a coach when managing a top club.

Thou shalt send a player back home after he complains of homesickness, having spent the last eight years with your club. (Reference to Tomas Rosicky at Arsenal.)

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:p:p Thou shalt always get carried away in desperation and buy a player who is not good enough for your team , just because you cannot get the ones you wanted for that position , then realise quite quickly that he is even worse than you hoped and stick him back on the transfer list or try to get him to accept mutual termination , thereupon having him whinging and crying at you in a conversation :o

:thdn: Thou shalt quickly get fed up of the same conversations in press conferences and job interviews and wonder why they are actually there in the game , but still do them because it seems like the right thing to do :thdn:

Thous shalt never blame your own tactics for losing games .

Thou shalt always blame the game itself , stating it is bugged

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Thou shalt always cancel their bid if it is accepted on the first try and make a smaller one, just to end up making a bigger bid for him than the first one, because the club won't accept it anymore.

Thou shalt feel very depressed and a lump in their throat to the point of stopping to play the save when their best player and world-beater is Junior Malanda and heards what happened in real life :(

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Thou shalt sell a player at your club who in real life you don't like but in game is a cracking player, bite off your nose to spite your face.

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Thou shalt search for players who you had in past careers just to see how the FM gods have treated his stats now he is a bit older and plumper.

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Thou shalt always suggest develop own youth players as a philosophy this way the board always agree to improve facilities.

Thou shalt always play possession based football.

Thou shalt never sign expensive star players.

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Thou shalt always lose your 12 game unbeaten streak to a championship side due to a 90th minute goal from 25 yards out.

thou shalt always have their save ruined by their laptop battery dying and youve got to play the 10 games you played before the defeat of the battery.

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Thine player shall always shoot from an impossible angle, rather than cutting thine ball back to an unmarked teammate in the box. And low was the side netting hit, and the goalkeeper saw it was good.

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Thou shalt always remember the 1% of occasions when you lose a player to injury after making all three substitutions, and thou shalt vent your anger on the forums after such occurrences.

Thou shalt never remember the 99% of occasions when you don't.

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Thou shalt conduct imaginary interviews once thou has quit the game

Everytime I'm in the shower.

Thou shalt listen to the AssMans advice for team talks, but completely ignore him anyway.

Thou shalt tell Assman to block any agent offers thou should recieve instantly.

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