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The_Damaja

Things you know you have taken too far when playing FM

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I am fluent in a couple languages, but I know obscenities in about twenty. I have taken to swearing at players in their native languages when they do something to annoy me.

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Go out the backyard , Put my first letter of my first and last name on my football jacket by stapling paper on there then proceed to have a training session with them pretending im talking to them and having a chat with the lads when low and behold....Im there by myself :)

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I hope to recreate one of my favourite golfing memories where while celebrating holing a birdie putt I managed to punch myself in the eye... The worst thing was I didnt even get to see the ball go in... I just knew where it was going the moment I hit it... The ball, not my eye :)

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Last night, my girlfriend wanted to have sex and kept trying to kiss me and such. I kept telling her to wait until my team finished their match. I have a problem.

No. You don't. You are the man. You decide when, what sex en where sex. And certainly not when you're playing FM.

Just my two cents :thup:

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I go out for a lucky cig during penalty shootouts. Was shocked the other night when I came back in the other night and they were still going at 12-12. I quickly retreated to the kitchen so as not to hex them and when I came back we had won 14-13

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when my striker shot in the winning goal in the dutch cup final in extra time, i pulled my shirt over my head and ran trough the living room

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i sometimes change my english name to have an italian or spanish slant depending who im managing!!

simon jeavons if managing in england, simeone la jeavigo if in italy !! :$

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I handed my parents a transfer request because they won't increase my allowance.

Quality :-D

Last night, my girlfriend wanted to have sex and kept trying to kiss me and such. I kept telling her to wait until my team finished their match. I have a problem.

Just pause the match, have sex while thinking about FM (whether to tweak your tactics, make subs etc.), and then go back and finish your match when your done. Then you avoid decreasing gf morale :-)

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I've given the finger to so many opposing managers when I've made a stirring comeback or after they have given me crap in the press conference before usually followed by a very loud expletive

I've also ran round the room jumping David Pleat style after I took my home town team Glentoran to the Champions League final

I do stand up and appeal for offsides as well and then look accusingly at the screen

And it's appalling when someone tells you "its just a game" after you've just lost a match!

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Having just skimmed this thread, I felt I had to comment.

I have never gone as far as wearing a suite, but I do often find myself commentating about the games on FM, as well as when watching real life football favouring my current FM team...

That's probably a good thing, I imagine it'd kill you.

-Fist pump when a winning goal is scored.

-Having imaginary press conferences after signing a player (no need to do this with FM10)

I do those. I sometimes do press conferences in my head when I'm in lectures or wandering down the street. I also start writing up shortlists and designing tactics.

I have at times refused to watch the monitor when it is a penalty shootout.

I can't watch shootouts. Not when my players are taking them anyway.

If im managing in a foreign country, I often go Steve McClaren and spend my time speaking in a horrible accent.

I might have done that once or twice...

I hope to recreate one of my favourite golfing memories where while celebrating holing a birdie putt I managed to punch myself in the eye... The worst thing was I didnt even get to see the ball go in... I just knew where it was going the moment I hit it... The ball, not my eye :)

:D

That may be the best celebration of all time.

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I have pretend press conferences in my mind if I'm on the train and bored and on the way home.

Who am I kidding? I have them all the time. Everywhere. I'm having one now.

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Back in old FM when it was CM I would play the game totally in the language of the nation I was managing in. It would drive me crazy but I was very hardcore player at the time.

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Back in old FM when it was CM I would play the game totally in the language of the nation I was managing in. It would drive me crazy but I was very hardcore player at the time.

Hey Marek, shouldn't you have posted:

Things you know you have taken too far when playing FM

using chinese doublenicks on the FM-forum.

:)

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At least once a day me and my brother will call each other to discuss tactics, players we want to buy, who we have found in game, as if its R/L. Plus all of my closest friends play the game and we r constantly talkin fm. Also on a sat night if we can all get together we have upto 6 different laptops on the go with indervidual FM. But then again is that takin it to far or just normal for FM gamers.

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cueff.jpg

PICT0314.jpg

Hell of a player tbf

Outstanding dedication. :D

I bet when you wear that in public everyone is secretly laughing at you not being able to spell Cruyff.

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Things I do often to the annoyance/embarrassment of the wife...

1. Before kick-off if at home(after team select when I have chosen my team talk) I walk into the kitchen then back again (the dressing room). Looking behind and up and nodding (acknowledging fans)

2. Before and during the game, looking to my right and nodding/shaking head/smiling (looking at my Assistant)

3. At Half time I walk into the kitchen and back again (see no. 1)

4. As mentioned by others I have been known to stand up and watch the game (edge of technical area)

5. Wave my arms about like a looney

6. When things not going my way, and I have finally realised shouting and waving my arms like a looney doesn't work I just fold my arms and look unimpressed

7. No matter the score, I always look up or across and nod at the end of each match. Some times I hold my arm up in a clinched fist (acknowledging the fans again)

8. During periods of loading/background scores I chat to myself, pretending I am taking training (the wifey goes balistic about this one - as I sometimes talk out loud)

9. Also pretend to take training during toilet breaks - as well as board meetings etc.

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Absolutely fantastic thread! And to think I thought I was the only one who did these things! I'm not the only one who is abit crackers then!

The main ones I do - fist pumping, jumping out of my chair in outrage at a bad decision, throwing my arms up, shouting, swearing, the usual.

Everywhere I go, I do manager interviews in my head! Almost non-stop if I'm not speaking to someone/playing FM/watching TV! Even in bed, before I go to sleep I am doing them! On the bog, down the street, at work, it's mental really!

Whenever I am manager of England, I ALWAYS play the national anthem before a match! Drives my girlfriend mad the amount I have it on!

Also, I usually do a save game with my cousin, as he is just as addicted. When we play there is a massive atmosphere. I even have 'We are The Champions' ready to be played after yet another title success! We shake hands before the match, and after. Always did. Until FM08, I was Chelsea, he was Man Utd. We met in the Champions League Final one year, biggest game I have ever played on FM due to the fact it was against my 'rival'. I even downloaded the music and played it before kickoff.

It was 4-4 in last minute of extra time, brilliant game. I had had a man sent off, had had three penaltie appeals turned down, and he had scored a dubious penalty, Ronaldo dived for it, and converted it. El Nino (Torres - I signed him for Chelsea) picks the ball up and runs at the defence, round one, then two, lays it back for Sergio Aguero who blasts the ball home.

Cue massive screams from me, jumping around the room 'F'in GET IN! YEEEEEEEEESSSSSS!!!!!'

All of a sudden it's my cousin who is jumping up, the goal has only been disallowed (to this day I still don't know what for, terrible decision!).

So it's a penalty shootout, which I inevitably lose. I'm gutted, nearly crying, he is dancing round the room.

I refused to shake hands with him after that. Jammy, scummy, undeserving git!

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You know you've taken FM too far when you steal things of here and use them as jokes on Live at the Apollo...

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Quality :-D

Just pause the match, have sex while thinking about FM (whether to tweak your tactics, make subs etc.), and then go back and finish your match when your done. Then you avoid decreasing gf morale :-)

To be faie - he could probably do the deed in between clicking to play match and the slight pause as it transfers to TV view.

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The worst one I ever done was in my FM 09 save. I was set to play in the champions league final, I bought myself a replica medal of ebay, gold & silver (£30 + £30), a cheap bottle of champagne (£8) and wore my suit and played the champions league music before the game and set up a playlist for the presentation of the trophy. Turned out I lost the game and I didn't need the playlist or the champagne.

I now always recieve one of these medals after a champions league final

I have also eyed up the replica trophies now and then, thank god I havn't went that far...yet

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had a good one earlier today

was in the pub and glanced up at the tv which was showing sky sports news - the breaking news ticket was SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY PART COMPANY WITH BRIAN LAWS

my first thought was i quite fancy that job, before i realised it was in fact real life :-)

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Things I do often to the annoyance/embarrassment of the wife...

You mean 'carer', right?

This whole thread is madness. Superb, wonderful, beautiful madness.

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Me and my mate (this was about 95/96), we sat down for about 4 hours and added our whole football team with, what we thought were their real attributes. Added them to the club they supported and over the next few weeks played it whilst keeping an eye on our progress. Was very much fun.

Done all the moves, shouting at the screen etc. Also have got so ****ed off with a season I've actually sulked and my missus has wondered what's wrong (when I've told her she has said I'm sad and the game is not real!) I'm sorry but it is real and I love it as much as my children.

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This thread is quality :D

I do the usual fist in the air when I score, and when I concede I'll shout at the laptop, get out of my chair, moan, and get back in my chair.

When I beat both Rangers and Celtic (I'm St Mirren) I stuck the fingers up at the screen and said "Get it right f**king up you!" I also shout at the ref for not booking opposition players, or for booking mine.

I also play "goal music" on my Ipod Station when we score at home :p

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so im not the only mental one then,

when im villa and beat the blues i chant and sing s**t on the city and start chanting VILLA VILLA VILLA!

oh and when im 5-0 up etc, i chant easy easy easy!

and wave my hands at crowd, its funny as.

btw this thread is quality, lol at people wearing suits for finals.

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Go out the backyard , Put my first letter of my first and last name on my football jacket by stapling paper on there then proceed to have a training session with them pretending im talking to them and having a chat with the lads when low and behold....Im there by myself :)

Excellent, there is another "Adam S" here!

Ive got loads, especially because I used to live with a fellow FM nutjob.

1) Anyone ever do the commentary in their heads, especially about 'the manager' i.e you? So if you are three down and you decide to storm off to the kitchen for a cup of tea, in your head there is a Martin Tyler and Andy Gray going,

"Look at this Andy, Shaw is furious!! He's thrown a water bottle down and.....yes he's off down the tunnel!! Shaw is walking out on his own team!!"

"Well Martin I can't blame him, his side have just been appalling, and he is sending a message saying that they just can't put in a performance like this!"

2) I do the whole sideline thing as well, i point and shout OI!!! GET BACK!!! and when they dont listen and we concede, I shrug my shoulders at the screen as if Im saying to the player, "What do you expect when you dont listen to me???"

3) Im a Stockport County fan, so whenever I see a player who Ive only ever heard of in FM, Ill always make a judgement based on how good he is in that. Its great because it often works. Christian Ribeiro had been great for my Championship Bristol C side

, so last month when he came to County I said to my Dad "Good signing, good signing him." and hes been our best player.

4) Another example of this is when the infamous Richie Partridge (remember how good he was on 03/04?) was sold to Chester, he came to play against County. I said to my Dad, "We've got to watch this guy he's bloody brilliant." I could see my Dad wondering how I knew. And not a word of a lie, when he banged in a screamer against us, I stood up and screamed "ITS RICHIE ****ING PARTRIDGE, YOU CANT GIVE HIM THAT MUCH ****ING SPACE!!!" I'd never seen him play in real life before that, but as far as I was concerned, I knew him like the back of my hand!

5) I remember we had a friendly against Liverpool reserves and FM legend Dean Bouzanis was playing for them. I called my FM geek mate and we both just went nuts over the phone at each other like schoolgirls that had seen.......whatever pop star they love, as we had both signed him for our teams. I nearly went and got his autograph but realised id be killed by all the fellow county fans!

6) In real life if a County reserve comes through the system, but AFTER Ive used him on my FM first team, then its me that discovered him, not the manager. I am therefore responsible for Tommy Rowe's success in real life and subsequent move to Peterborough, as I had been playing him in Countys FM team for about a year previous.

Ill try and think of some more, but yeh, Fm take control of your life. I can often walk to the supermarket and back running through a press conference in my head!

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cueff.jpg

PICT0314.jpg

Hell of a player tbf

You are officially a legend. I wanted to do this last year when I signed a regen for County called Jose Laurent (ST), and he took me almost singlehandedly from League 1 to the Prem before I sold him for about £10 million.

Oh one more. Do you all now refer to players by their FM abbreviation? Me and my flatmate have done this for years, so now its totally normal.

"IS he an AMC?"

"Nah, hes more of a DM slash MC, but really he is one of those players who is a DRLC/DM/MC"

At which point we both nod and groan, because we know that those sort of players are rarely good anywhere!

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THere is a massive whiteboard next to my desk and although half of it is taken up with college coursework notes, etc, the other half currently is a football pitch with lots of circles and arrows and scribbles on it :D

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On my custom database I almost cried when I took Hull to extra time at 1-1, my team was exhausted but held out until 120mins, then conceded. I had to take off my best players for ET too, went totally defensive. I had some good pen takers left so was hoping for it to go to that. I then go and get Hull in the other cup.

Happend about 4 hours ago

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I give myself Match of the day interviews while on the bus/bog/missus. Hansen has been very harsh about my defence this year.

I do sky style commentary during games and press conference's after them. If I look at replays it's Andy Gray doing the commentary.

I once ran round the house with a collander (champs lge trophy) and stood at the window.... it was my open top bus. I waved at the neighbour washing his car.

I talk to my assman in my head. We discuss transfers, he always agrees with me.

I "bump fists" with the screen when my team scores.

Is this unhealthy?

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When we score, I like to punch my first, or stand up and re-enact the goal with an imaginary football, etc. I also like to commentate on matches and pretend I'm chatting with Eddie Gray (does the Leeds commentary). :cool:

When we concede (and providing the game is close) I often start screeching at the computer in a really high-pitched voice, swearing at the players and waving my arms about like a freaking nutter. Anyone seen that video of the angry German kid? I remind me of him. If someone video'd me, I'd be famous by now from youtube. I go absolutely nuts, especially when my defenders mess up or a player is constantly in acres of space, or is through on goal. Accidently knocked my laptop on the floor the other day in a rage. Then I got all embarrassed because whilst I was steaming, we had scored.

If we score a last minute goal, I like to replay it, twice. The first time I act as the manager I supposedly am whilst commentating, the second time I pretend to be a fan going wild.

If I go for a whizz (or other), I pretend to read a report in my head about myself (I created myself and added me into the game, as a 16 year old on the fringes of the first team, with -10 potential), about a match, build up to another game or maybe just think through my team, or what it'll be if I sign who I plan to, and think how great it is.

I have loads of other ones, just can't remember them for now. I'm sure I'll remember over coming days. If I do, I'll post them up. :cool:

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currently managing as Sunderland, play Prokofiev at the start of every match, i generally get very abusive towards the referee & opposition players, not forgetting my own whenever an anton esque cock up is made, i also have the tendency to break into real life chants/songs singling a particular player out, not to forget cursing opposition players mums/wives when they've just scored an important goal against me, me n my brother have been known to fight when playing a network game, i must have broken countless mugs due to bad performances aswel

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I think some of my best/most embarressing have to be:

1. Explaining to my dad how good this player is, even though I've never seen him play, just remember him from an FM save.

2. Smiling to myself for finding Lucas on FM07 or 08, can't remember, he was at Gremio, the season Newcastle started with Giuseppe Rossi, think it was 08, not sure.

3. Fist pumping.

4. Screaming GOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL like the Spanish commentators.

5. Playing FM whilst having a ***** in the loo.

6. Playing Fm whilst in the bath (have the laptop on a stall and I lean over the bath. My charger also plugs in so can play for however long I like, or the water turns cold.

7. Spending more time playing FM then doing real life important things.

Does all of this make me a) sad, b) a bad person or c) addicted to FM or does it just make me normal?! My poor family!

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I tried to seduce my wife by telling her that she is on my favoured personnel list.

:(

Did you wait until she was performing well before praising her?

You don't want her thinking that you're too easy to please!

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I used to re create goals that were scored in my room :p

Think family got annoyed that the celling was collapsing in.

Now I just provide real time managerial feedback to a 'media man' :p

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I've recently bought a new laptop which has the capability to hook up to my TV in my room via HDMI. Have more than once turned on the TV and analysed my teams tactics and performances using the far larger screen to get a better view of things :D

I played FM09 quite a lot on my 42" 1080p Panasonic plasma TV last Christmas... up until the image retention started to worry me... there was a little shield shape burned into the top left hand corner of the picture for everything I watched on TV in the first half of January. :D

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