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CFuller

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Everything posted by CFuller

  1. I started my journeyman save at a Welsh club. My English manager was there for just over two years but never learnt to speak Welsh. That might've been because I was in south Wales (near Swansea), where English is very dominant, whereas Welsh is much more widely-spoken in the north and west. Funnily enough, I ended that save in Basel, which is a German-speaking area of Switzerland. My manager became fluent in German very quickly, but also learnt good Italian (no French, though). I could also send my foreign players to learn German and/or Italian.
  2. Yeah, I wouldn't make too many assumptions based on a few wins with one of the strongest teams in the Championship. Then again, Sheffield United are also one of the oldest teams in the league and probably wouldn't be obvious candidates to counter-press their way to victory. The data hub looks really cool, especially with the customisation options they showed off. I'm still not sold on staff meetings, but some of the little QoL changes are pretty neat. The player animations do look so much smoother too. I'm still not fully sold on FM22 just yet, but I at least feel more optimistic now than I did pre-stream.
  3. CFuller

    25 Years

    ELSEWHERE IN FOOTBALL... Real Madrid smash the world transfer record, as Juventus midfielder Zinedine Zidane becomes a 'Galactico' for an eye-watering £45.8million. I mean, the 29-year-old Frenchman is a pretty handy playmaker... but surely no footballer is worth THAT much! Manchester United begin their pursuit of a record fourth consecutive Premiership title by spending a British-record £28million on Lazio midfielder Juan Sebastián Verón. In what looks like another very smart move, Sir Alex Ferguson sells his star defender Jaap Stam back to PSV for £3.7million after the Dutchman makes some controversial comments in his new book. A Copa America full of shocks ends with Ecuador beating Mexico 4-1 in Bogotá to win their first continental title. Eduardo Hurtado of Argentinos Junior scores twice in the Final, while Brazil wonder how the hell they failed to get out of their group. After an unsuccessful spell at Nottingham Forest, former England icon David Platt takes his next managerial job - at Stenhousemuir in Scottish Division 2. Seriously? Whatever next? Chris Waddle becoming the new manager of Brechin... oh, you've got to be kidding me! In other Scottish managerial news, renowned entertainer George Graham returns home to replace Billy Davies at Motherwell. However, reports that John Jensen would join him at Fir Park prove wide of the mark when the ex-Arsenal midfielder becomes player-manager of B 93 in his native Denmark. IN OTHER NEWS... In one of tennis' greatest fairytales, Croatian wildcard Goran Ivanisevic wins the Wimbledon men's single title after beating Pat Rafter in a five-set classic. The West Brom fan had lost three previous Finals before injuries saw him fall to 125th in the world rankings. Novelist and former Conservative MP Jeffrey Archer is jailed for four years for perjury. He is found to have perverted the course of justice during a libel trial against the News of the World in 1987. Tim Burton's remake of the iconic 1968 film "Planet of the Apes" is released. For once, movie critics come to a unanimous agreement - the musical was way better. Ricky Gervais' workplace sitcom "The Office" makes its debut on BBC Two and is immediately greeted with astounding...ly average viewing figures. Ah well. Maybe it'll do better on the other side of the pond.
  4. CFuller

    25 Years

    JULY 2001 My new career as a football manager began on Saturday 14 July 2001 - the first day of pre-season training at Dagenham & Redbridge. I was immediately greeted at the training ground by assistant manager Terry Harris - a tough-as-nails 44-year-old who'd already been coaching for well over a decade. His links with the Daggers went all the way back to 1977, when he played - and scored - for the original Dagenham FC at Wembley in the FA Trophy Final. He smiled, "It's been nearly 25 years now. It'd be quite nice to get there again, wouldn't it?" Terry then formally introduced me to the rest of the backroom staff. Craig Young was the only other coach on the payroll - and even by his own admission, he wasn't exactly a great one. On the plus side, we did have a knowledgeable scout in Mick Loughton, while Richard Harper was an expert physiotherapist. Mick and Dick, we call 'em. I then met my players for the first time as manager. Obviously, I'd worked with most of them before as a coach (and even played with some of them), but I felt it was time to reset our previous relationships and start again from scratch. Two of the Daggers' most devoted servants - captain Lee Matthews and his fellow defender Jason Broom - led the introductions and would be my eyes and ears in the dressing room. After just a few days assessing my players on the training ground, it became clear to me that a 4-4-2 was probably the wise choice for a starting tactic. I know all the cool kids love a 3-5-2 or a 4-3-3 or even a diamond, but when you're managing in the Conference, no-nonsense direct wing-play is king. Almost as soon as I'd settled into my office, I was already on the move again. Our pre-season campaign began with a long journey north - to a training camp in southern Scotland, where we would play our first three friendlies. Our first stop was Stair Park - the home of Division 2 side Stranraer. 18 JULY 2001: Stranraer vs Dagenham & Redbridge My managerial career got off to an impressive start against Stranraer. A couple of good first-half crosses from Tony Lock and Mark Janney were calmly finished by Junior McDougald, whose brace were the only goals in a solid win. We were so dominant that our hosts didn't even manage a shot at goal until second-half stoppage time! Stranraer - 0 Dagenham & Redbridge - 2 (McDougald 23,38) Friendly, Attendance 659 DAG & RED LINE-UP (4-4-2): Roberts (Gothard); Goodwin, Cole (Rooney), Matthews (Smith), Vickers (Broom); Janney, Hill (Brennan), Terry (Jones), Lock (Forbes); Stein (Shipp), McDougald (McGavin). After that game, we said a quick goodbye to winger Steve Forbes, who was sold to Dover for an initial £55,000 (potentially rising to £70,000). Someone call Kent Police, because Dover have been robbed! As Forbes headed back to England, we travelled to Dumfries for our next match, against another team Division 2. Queen of the South, to be specific. 21 JULY 2001: Queen of the South vs Dagenham & Redbridge Fun fact: Queen of the South are the only British football league team who are mentioned in the Bible. For a while, it looked like we would need some divine intervention to beat the Doonhamers, who were twice denied by Tony Roberts in the first half. I switched from a 4-4-2 to a 4-3-3 in the second half, and the tactical change paid off when Junior McDougald finished a 66th-minute counter-attack. Though Mark Graham found the net for the home team late on, his goal was disallowed for offside, and we held on for a narrow victory. Queen of the South - 0 Dagenham & Redbridge - 1 (McDougald 66) Friendly, Attendance 299 DAG & RED LINE-UP (4-4-2): Roberts (Gothard); Smith (Goodwin), Cole (Rooney), Matthews, Broom (Vickers); Janney (Heffer), Vaughan, Terry (Brennan), Jones (McGavin); Stein (Shipp), McDougald (Lock). BOOKED: Matthews. While my search for a new right-winger continued, we finished our Scottish tour with a match against non-league Huntly. Surely this would be a walk in the park, right? 25 JULY 2001: Huntly vs Dagenham & Redbridge Okay, maybe not. Huntly actually created more scoring opportunities than us, but their woeful shooting - and some assured goalkeeping from Paul Gothard - kept them at bay. We were much more devastating at the other end, with Mark Janney supplying a couple of assists from right wing. Junior McDougald's fierce shot in the 10th minute opened the scoring, while Mark Stein popped up late on to seal the win. Huntly - 0 Dagenham & Redbridge - 2 (McDougald 10, Stein 77) Friendly, Attendance 79 DAG & RED LINE-UP (4-4-2): Gothard (Roberts); Smith (Goodwin), Cole (Matthews), Rooney, Vickers (Broom); Janney, Heffer (Brennan), Hill (Vaughan), Lock (Hayzelden); Stein (Shipp), McDougald (McGavin). BOOKED: Cole. As we returned home, we welcomed in two new coaches - 49-year-old Philip Holder and 29-year-old Richard Hall. I'm not sure what the goalkeepers will make of being coached by electronic musician Moby, but if they start complaining about having cardiac problems, I might have to rethink it. Next on the schedule was our first home match of pre-season, against a Southend team who finished 11th in Division 3 last term. David Webb was in his third spell as manager of the Essex club, having previously managed Chelsea in the Premiership in the mid-1990s. Actually, I'm pretty sure he was Mark Stein's boss at Stamford Bridge at one point. 28 JULY 2001: Dagenham & Redbridge vs Southend United This should have been our first real test of pre-season, but we got off to a flyer against Southend. Junior McDougald (yes, that man again!) volleyed in a killer ball from Paul Terry after just two minutes, before Mark Stein doubled our lead. The Shrimpers then started to fight back, with Jason Harris pulling one goal back just before half-time to ruin our spotless defensive record. David Webb's men couldn't find an equaliser after the break, and when McDougald scored his SIXTH pre-season goal in the 74th minute, another impressive Daggers win was secured! Dagenham & Redbridge - 3 (McDougald 2,74, Stein 27) Southend United - 1 (Harris 42) Friendly, Attendance 825 DAG & RED LINE-UP (4-4-2): Roberts (Gothard); Goodwin, Smith (Matthews), Cole (Rooney), Vickers; Janney (Hayzelden), Hill (Brennan), Terry, Jones; McDougald (McGavin), Stein (Shipp). Four games, four wins! Hey, this managerial lark is quite easy!
  5. CFuller

    25 Years

    I was pretty much the only CMer at my school (the other boys were much more into FIFA 97 indoor football) so I can't say I have similar memories. All my CM memories are from playing at home. Like my very first session on CM3 aged eight, when I was so hooked that I stayed up way past my bedtime. Or beating Finland on penalties to win my first World Cup with England. Anyway, time to create some new ones...
  6. Women's football. WOMEN'S. There is more than one woman who plays football. I wouldn't say nothing has changed to international management since FM12. There have been changes... but those changes haven't been for the better. On FM13 (and maybe even as recently as FM16), you could hold private chats with any of your international players - for example, to praise/criticise their club form, or suggest that they move to another club if they're not playing enough. That feature has been completely absent from the international side of the game since FM17 at least. I still have no idea why it was taken away. I love international management, but on recent FMs, it's become so stale and bare bones that it's not really worth playing.
  7. CFuller

    25 Years

    Dagenham & Redbridge squad - Start of 2001/2002 season GOALKEEPERS Paul Gothard - GK, age 27, English Gothard is an agile goalkeeper who doesn't make many mistakes. After two years at Hayes, he has moved to Victoria Road as a backup. Tony Roberts - GK, age 31, Welsh [2 caps] Roberts is determined, authoritative, and a huge crowd favourite. He played for Wales and QPR before his Football League career was ended by injury. DEFENDERS Jason Broom - D/M L, age 31, English Broom is Mr Dagenham & Redbridge. The fearless left-back has worn the red-and-blue since our formation in 1992, making over 200 league appearances. Tim Cole - D RC, age 24, English Cole has been a rock-like presence in the centre of our defence since 1997. He has loads of stamina and physical strength but is not the most convincing tackler. Lee Goodwin - D R, age 22, English Goodwin is our starting right-back, and one of the first names on the teamsheet. He's brave and energetic, if a little slow off the mark. Lee Matthews - D C, age 28, English Daggers captain Matthews is one of our longest-serving players. The central defender is strong in the air and rarely shirks a challenge. Mark Rooney - SW/D RC, age 23, English Rooney is a mediocre sweeper who isn't very quick, isn't very strong, and isn't very comfortable on the ball. Basically, he's not Franz Beckenbauer. Mark Smith - D RC, age 33, English Smith is our highest-paid player on £1,400 per week, but I'm not quite sure why. He can run pretty fast for an old fella but that's about it. Ashley Vickers - D LC, age 29, English Vickers is well-known for his teamwork and his commitment to the Daggers cause. Though mainly a left-back, he also has the aerial ability to fill in at centre-half. MIDFIELDERS Mark Brennan - M C, age 35, English Midfield workhorse and set-piece specialist Brennan has been there and done that. He played over 100 league games for Ipswich in the 1980s. Steve Forbes - M RC, age 25, English Right-winger Forbes has two attributes higher than 8: Determination and Jumping. If he's "indispensable to the club", my name is William Hague. Kieran Gallagher - AM R, age 24, English Another mediocre right-winger. On loan at Boreham Wood. Danny Hayzelden - AM L, age 19, English Pacey wingman Hayzelden has just signed from Isthmian League side Grays Athletic. He also looks pretty useful from set-pieces. Steve Heffer - M C, age 28, English Heffer is an aggressive destroyer who does the basics well, even if his passing isn't the best. He certainly isn't somebody you want to mess with. Danny Hill - AM C, age 26, English Our most creative and flamboyant midfielder, Hill justifies his £1,000 weekly wage. He most recently did the league rounds with Cardiff. Mark Janney - M R, age 23, English Janney is a right-winger with some actual ability for once! The ex-Tottenham trainee is fast but also has the dribbling skills to complement that pace. Matt Jones - M L, age 30, English This fella probably isn't even the best footballer named Matthew Jones. Mind you, he is a fine left-winger who can cross the ball pretty well. Tony Lock - AM/F L, age 24, English Another new arrival at Victoria Road, Lock is a veteran of 102 league games with Colchester. As well as having good technique, this winger is a good finisher. Paul Terry - M C, age 22, English Energetic ball-winner Terry has been overshadowed by his younger brother - Chelsea defender John. I suspect that Paul probably won't cheat on his wife, though. Steve Vaughan - M C, age 19, English Stevie Vaughan is our sweet little thing, he's our pride and joy. He's an agile and technical young midfielder, I'm his little lover boy. FORWARDS Junior McDougald - S C, age 26, American Texas-born speed merchant McDougald has an excellent scoring record at this level. He is also a part-time actor who's appeared on Sky One's "Dream Team". Steve McGavin - AM/F C, age 32, English Former Colchester and Wycombe ace McGavin is a strong target man with good aerial reach. He is also one of our few players who's comfortable on either foot. Paul Piscopides - S C, age 17, English A quick and very young striker. On loan at Heybridge. Danny Shipp - S C, age 24, English A Dagger since 1997, Shipp is one of our all-time top scorers. He may not be the quickest striker around but is often in the right place in the right time. Mark Stein - S C, age 35, English One-time Chelsea hotshot Stein is winding down his career in non-league football. Despite a few fitness concerns, he is still incredibly lethal on his day.
  8. CFuller

    25 Years

    Thanks, fellas. I've been wanting to write a long-term Championship Manager story like this for a while now. I mentioned in my 2002 World Cup story thread that I started something like this on CM97/98 but lost interest after two seasons. I then planned to do it on CM00/01, which was my favourite game from the Champ Man era, but CM01/02 made more sense as it was more stable and had some user patches that fixed some significant bugs in long-term saves.
  9. CFuller

    25 Years

    It's been a while, hasn't it? Yes, folks, I'm delighted to be coming back to FMS - and with another Championship Manager story. To mark the 20th anniversary of Championship Manager: Season 01/02, I will be chronicling my managerial journey on that game over the course of 25 years. I will also regularly keep you updated on what's happening in the wider game world, as well as real-life news events and pop culture of the time. I'm running CM01/02 fully patched up to 3.9.68, with some extra user-made patches to improve long-term playability. I'm running a heavily-edited version of Luessenhoff's database, which massively expands on the original database. (Seriously, this DB has well over 100,000 players!) This will be a journeyman career, not necessarily a one-club save. Just because I'm starting at Dagenham & Redbridge (I chose them as they're the closest Conference team to me) doesn't mean I will finish there. As you can probably gather, we are in for quite a long journey, so please sit back and enjoy the ride! Christopher Fuller (CFuller) 12 October 2021
  10. CFuller

    25 Years

    25 years in a long time, especially in football. When my love for the beautiful game began, the sport looked quite different to what it has become now. In the 1970s, drinking was still a major part of football culture. Terracing was still preferred to seating at the biggest stadiums. The game wasn't as ethnically diverse, and the most exotic foreigners in the Football League generally came from Ireland. I grew up in east London, but my parents were originally from the north of the city. My father was a lifelong Arsenal supporter who took me to my first game at Highbury when I was just 10 years old. It was 2 October 1976, and the Gunners were hosting Queens Park Rangers. The visitors took the lead twice, but goals from the Irish trio of playmaking magician Liam Brady, veteran right-back Pat Rice, and goal machine Frank Stapleton sent us home celebrating a 3-2 victory. From that day, I wanted to be a footballer - and I wanted to play for the Arsenal. After rising through the local youth leagues, and after several unsuccessful trials, my dream came true when I signed schoolboy forms with Arsenal as a 14-year-old in 1980. I was a central defender who wasn't afraid to get stuck into challenges, though I could also play at full-back if required. My regular partner in the youth and reserve teams during those early days was another boy in my age group: Tony Adams. You might have heard of him. Adams broke into the senior team for the first time in 1983, though I had to wait a couple of years before Don Howe gave me my debut - at home to Hereford United in the second round of the League Cup. We won that match 2-1, and I went on to feature in three more cup ties until Howe stepped down in March 1986. George Graham - a former Arsenal midfielder who was part of the 1971 double-winning team my dad would always wax lyrical about - took over as manager ahead of the 1986/1987 season. Graham's pragmatic, safety-first approach to football tactics wasn't universally popular, but it would soon deliver results. To revitalise a Gunners team that had stagnated in 7th place in Division 1, Graham decided to ditch most of his ageing players and promote youth talent. Adams became an established starter and would be appointed club captain in 1988 - a role he still holds today - while still in his early 20s. Other youngsters who emerged as first-team regulars included Paul Merson and the late, great David Rocastle. I was not so lucky. I never played a league match for Arsenal - and on one rainy day in January 1987, Graham summoned me to his office and told me I was no longer required. Instead, I was offered the chance to kick-start my senior career in Division 2 with Millwall, whom Graham had managed with distinction before returning to Highbury. Based in New Cross in south-east London, Millwall were the only professional football club in London never to have played in the first division - but they weren't exactly regarded as plucky underdogs. The Lions' supporters had long been associated with hooliganism, with one particular night at Luton in 1985 going down in history for all the wrong reasons. Following those darkest of days, my arrival at The Den coincided with an upturn in fortunes. With future club legends Alan McLeary and Keith Stevens playing alongside me in defence, and Tony Cascarino and Teddy Sheringham banging in the goals at the other end, we would produce arguably the greatest team in the club's history. After slowly working my way into manager John Docherty's team during my first half-season, I became an established starter in the 1987/1988 season, which ended in us surprisingly winning the Division 2 title by four points. Millwall were promoted to Division 1 for the first time in their history Despite being tipped for relegation, we defied all the odds with a fantastic start to the 1988/1989 campaign - even leading the table for a few days at the beginning of October. It didn't last, though, and we ultimately dropped to 10th place after failing to win our final 10 matches. That was a sign of struggles to come in 1989/1990, when our top-flight fairytale ended in us finishing rock-bottom - with just five victories to our name. Millwall would not return to England's elite. For my final six years with the club, we were back in Division 2 - which was confusingly rebranded as Division 1 in 1992, after top-flight clubs broke away from the Football League to form the Premiership, which would transform the sport like never before. We reached the second-tier play-offs twice - firstly in 1990/1991 under the disciplinarian regime of Bruce Rioch, and then in 1993/1994 under the more affable Mick McCarthy, which was our first season at our new all-seater stadium. The New Den never generated quite the same atmosphere as the old Den, which was renowned for its 'Millwall Roar' from the club's most passionate followers. The 1994/1995 season was an unmemorable one spent largely in mid-table, but it delivered one of my career highlights. After holding Arsenal to a 0-0 draw at The Den in Round 3 of the FA Cup, we went to Highbury for the replay... and shocked the Gunners 2-0 with goals from Mark Beard and Mark Kennedy. We then knocked out Chelsea on penalties before falling to QPR in Round 5. 1995/1996 started promisingly enough, and we were top of Division 1 midway through the season until a crushing 6-0 defeat against Sunderland knocked us off our stride. Shortly after that, McCarthy resigned to become the new Republic of Ireland national manager. His successor Jimmy Nicholl was unable to steer our form out of a catastrophic tailspin, and within a few months, we had gone from promotion contenders to being relegated in 22nd place. Millwall were now in the third tier, but I would not be joining them there. After playing over 300 matches for the Lions in nine-and-a-half years, the club would not renew my contract. That was partly due to financial problems which would eventually see them enter administration, but also because I was starting to suffer from chronic knee problems. Instead, I dropped down another division - and moved back north of the River Thames to play for Leyton Orient in Division 3. However, I did not particularly enjoy my time at Brisbane Road, and after quickly losing my first-team place, I left Orient on a free transfer at the end of my first season. I was now 31 years old and contemplating retirement... until I got a career-changing phone call from an affable old gentleman named Ted Hardy. He was the manager of Dagenham & Redbridge - a semi-professional club near where I grew up in east London - and had just taken them to the 1997 FA Trophy Final at Wembley, which they lost to Woking. Hardy offered me the chance to play part-time for the Daggers in the Isthmian League - two divisions below the Football League - while also coaching the youth team. This was a young club (formed only in 1992 after the merger of Dagenham FC and Redbridge Forest), but one with ambitions of playing in the professional ranks. It was an exciting prospect, and one I wanted to be involved in. The Daggers finished 4th and 3rd in the Isthmian League during my first two seasons at Victoria Road. Hardy retired at the end of the 1998/1999 season, and his successor Garry Hill immediately finished the job, leading us to the league title in 1999/2000. We would be heading back to the Conference for the first time since our relegation four years prior. Sadly, my playing days would come to an abrupt halt when I tore my anterior cruciate ligament during a pre-season friendly in July 2000. At the age of 34, and with my right knee almost completely ruined, it was time to hang up my boots and concentrate on the next phase of my career. I joined Hill on the first-team coaching set-up for our first season back in the Conference. It was a huge success, with a 3rd-place finish behind big-spending Rushden & Diamonds and perennial challengers Yeovil giving us hope that the Daggers would soon be playing in Division 3. Everything changed on 7 July 2001. After a disagreement with chairman Dave Andrews over the club's transfer policy, Hill suddenly resigned. A week later, after considering several candidates to replace Hill, Andrews asked me if I would like to take over as manager. I couldn't accept the offer quickly enough. At the age of just 35, I am heading into the unforgiving world of football management, and I will have to be prepared for the huge pressures that come with this job. Nonetheless, I am relishing the opportunity to (hopefully) finish the job that Hardy and Hill started - by leading the Daggers into the Football League. In my first 25 years in football, I've experienced many of the highs and lows that come with being a fan, a player, and a coach. Who knows what the next 25 years will bring as a manager?
  11. I know what I'm about to say is very pedantic and not really relevant to the discussion... but 22 is just the year number. It's not the 22nd version of FM by SI, it's the 18th version - or the 30th, if you're including Championship Manager.
  12. Just because YOU didn't want this feature doesn't mean that NOBODY wanted this feature. LITERALLY NOBODY? So, not a single one out of 1,000,000+ FMers from across the world will use this feature more than once?! Okay, then...
  13. How many hours of gameplay does that $50 get you? If it's in the hundreds, then that can't be that many forms of entertainment which deliver more value for money. Coca-Cola won't simply reveal their secret formula to some random Joe (or Jane) who wants to modify it for their own taste. I'd imagine there are similar issues why SI won't make the FM match engine moddable. An interesting idea, I'm pretty sure SI's licensing agreements with the leagues would stop them from including this. We're now venturing into Football Chairman territory, and SI have consistently said they won't go down that road for a game called Football Manager. But if you want your feature requests to be heard, this is the place for them: https://community.sigames.com/forums/forum/353-football-manager-feature-requests-pcmac/
  14. I think the sidebar is yellow because that's the colour associated with deadline day (thanks, Sky Sports) - and the team they were managing in those screenshots (Watford) also happen to play in yellow, which makes it stand out even more. But yeah, I would like to see the team colours be more prominent, just like they were before FM21. Can't say I'm that excited about a new-look deadline day, personally. If I'm ever taking part in deadline day, then that means something has gone wrong, because I usually get all my business done well in advance. And the staff meeting info will probably just go straight into my inbox. It feels like you're having to jump through more hoops and make more clicks to get the same info that you previously got all at once. In fairness, I have literally not had my assistant say "we are being overrun in midfield" since FM18. That meme is in the distant past now.
  15. Congratulations to all our winners... Mark, Dave, Jon, Mark, Jon, Mark... Mark... and anyone else I might've forgotten. Great to see plenty of recognition for storied veterans and talented newcomers alike in the FMS community. Now the show's over and we have to give Cristiano his suite back, so I guess I will siu next year.
  16. Better still, put up a statue at Wembley. After all, he's already achieved more with England than Alf Ramsey, Gareth Southgate, Bobby Robson and Peter Taylor combined.
  17. HALLELUJAH! Hail, hail, @mark wilson27. We all knew you were an FMS legend anyway but this just confirms it. Now I am looking forward to welcoming our next inductee, Jon1982, at the 2031 awards...
  18. Yeah, sadly, a lot of FMSers seem to have shorter lifespans than Watford managers...
  19. Ah yes, I remember the days when I had to briefly leave an awards show because my cats were fighting each other. These days, I just have a cat, singular.
  20. I demand a recount... er, I mean, well done again, Mark! I reckon you gonna need a massive yacht to take all your awards back home. Hmm... does anyone here have a massive yacht you could borrow? And oh look, our audience has actually doubled since the start of the ceremony.
  21. But yes, Mark is much funnier than I could even dream of being. Congratulations again, Mr Wilson.
  22. The first award goes to the event organiser - and the only attendee who's actually up for any awards. Go figure. Congrats, Mark. Since there's nobody here, I guess I'll do all the applause myself.
  23. Erm... it's 8 o'clock. Are there any other folks here, or is it just the two of us? Did Dave get stranded in Vladikavkaz again? Did Neil get stuck in another corrupted save file? Is 10-3 too busy yelling at clouds?
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