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Scatter

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0 "What we've got here is a failure to communicate"

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    So... You wanna buy a house?

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  1. Which begs the question: why be able to set your reputation manually at all then? If the game is not going to let you be a Neville Nobody at a decent sized club - and is punitively sacking you for setting these options as such - then the "feature" itself is absolutely pointless. I'm with serif, it's poor game design.
  2. ...according to FM13: HYD: Boss, got a minute? Mgr: Ah... Good timing. I was just wondering at what time today you'd be in. Have a seat. HYD: [sits down] Today? What's so special about today. Mgr: It's the 13th of March. HYD: And? Mgr: Well... it's the same every year. You don't say ****ing boo to me - ever! - for 12 months except for one week in March starting from the 13th. And even then, that one week starts with you always saying the same ****... HYD: That's not true! Mgr: Ok, whatever. I'm busy, what is it? HYD: I've just brought in a group of 15 and 16 year old kids on trial for your appraisal. [The manager stares blankly at the HYD for a few seconds] Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Uhhhh... Mgr: Alright, let's cut right to the chase. Are any of these little arseholes any good this year? Because last year you brought in a bunch of dribbling ******* all of whom trap the ball further than I can kick it. Now, not to put too fine a point on it, but we're at one of the biggest clubs in the world and spending tens of millions of pounds a year on youth development, so I'd like to think we can do a wee bit better than that. Just a smidge like... HYD: Uhhhh... I don't know. Yet. Mgr: You don't know? HYD: Yet. [The manager stares blankly again at the HYD for a few seconds] Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Tell you what I'll do, I'll have these trialists play a game against the under 18's and then I'll get back to you. Mgr: Oh that's a ****ing genius idea. Play this years dribbling ******** against last years crop of dribbling *******. That can't POSSIBLY fail. HYD: What else would you have me do? Watch these little ***** train for a period of time and actually determine their possible potential through prolonged and reasoned observation? Mgr: No, we can't have that. Wouldn't want you to earn your million pound per annum salary with a years worth of work when you can get away with doing it in a week now would we? HYD: Glad you understand. See you in a week? Mgr: ****. Off. Five days later. HYD: Hey boss, got a second? Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Uhhh... It's important. Mgr: Let me guess, this years ******* played against last years ******** this morning and you can now tell me who is going to be the next Messi based entirely on those 90 minutes. HYD: Well, not exactly. It's not an exact science. I won't be able to tell you for certain until AFTER they've signed a contract. Mgr: What? HYD: Yeah, sucks dunnit? I'm going to offer these [holds up list] eight kids a contract, all of whom might be completely awesome - based entirely on one 90 minute match and completely ignoring the YEARS of schoolboy football these kids have put in here - but I won't know for certain whether they're any good or not until after they've signed that contract. Mgr: What? HYD: I'll take care of this now and I'll see you in a couple of days. Mgr: ****. Off. Two days later. HYD: Hey boss. Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Just thought I'd let you know I got those eight kids signed up. Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Yeah, it was just in time too. There's only three games left in the u18's league this season. Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Ok. No worries. I'll be off. Think I'll take the missus on holiday for a while. I've heard really great things about The Maldives. Cya. Mgr: Wait, holiday? For how long? HYD: Dunno... maybe ten or eleven months. Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Ok. Cya. Mgr: Hang on a second. Are any of these kids you signed any good? HYD: Yeah... about that... Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Of the eight kids, one of them is a potential superstar. He's an absolute lock to make it big time. Unfortunately, he's a wingback, a position you've never used tactically in all your time here, so if you want to get the best out of this kid, you'll need to change formation. Fortunately though, I've tied him down to a 15 year contract on absurd money to give you the time to see the error of your tactical ways. Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: There's another three kids who also look like they're all going to be a wee bit special. All of them are really promising strikers. Unfortunately, you only play with one up front and have have at least three other strikers under the age of 21 who all look like they'll be world class - they must have been signed before my time here I think - so that's a bit ****... Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Good news is though that if we train these players up for a couple of years I reckon we could easily sell them pon for a substantial profit. Mgr: ****. O... Oh... ok. That's not too bad then. What about the other four kids? HYD: The other four? They're all ****. Hilariously inept. L.O.L. Watching those kids kick a ball is like watching a new born giraffe trying to walk for the first time. On ice. L.O.L. Mgr: You're a ****. HYD: Hahahahahahaha... Seriously... You should go and watch those kids "play". Funniest. Thing. Ever. Hahahahahahaha. Mgr: ****. Off. HYD: Cool. I'm off to work on my tan. See you in twelve months? Mgr: ****. Off. The youth recruitment/handling/progression aspect of the game is seriously borked. I can't be the only person who thinks this, surely?
  3. then maybe, just maybe, you shouldn't 'advertise' them as being for fm13 then, should you?
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