The Scottish Clan

Jimbhoy · June 18, 2003

And Now the End is Near..........

Thank f*ck for that. We were sh!te, I was sh!te the game is sh!te but hey looking forward to Season 2 already.

On a night when I thought things couldn't get worse they amazingly did. After playing a tight match against Champions Peterheed and only losing 2-0 we had a battling performance against Montrose and were deniad an equaliser at the death but we lost 2-1. The 3rd game of the night was against Morton and at half-time we were 1-0 down. The 2nd half however seemed like a nightmare, my defence seemed to totally disappear from the pitch and in scenes that just made me laugh we conceded goals in the 67th, 73rd, 74th, 75th, 80th & 88th to lose 7-0

The final game of the season was against the 2nd worst team in the league Queen's Park things looked bleak when we went 2-0 down after 22 minutes. The lads however provided me with one final big push and amazingly we scored in the 28th, 60th & 74th minute to comeback and win 3-2.

It's nice to have a totally unambitious board as at no time was my management position insecure unlike a few of the managers. Will they be so kind to me in Season 2.

MLC

coisty · June 18, 2003

The Great Ton

After a disappointing season for Morton Pete abraham kept a high note saying "Next season WILL bring success".

Looking back on the season, Morton started in a good way, beating everybody up to the first quater when things got worse and worse. Players had to be sold to loose up the wege grip on finance.

Albion Manager Bod tried killing our most influencial player and almost succeeded the third game against his Psycho Ho beasts. Alex williams missed a few games with bruised ribs and Fisken was out a few months with broken ribs

The last session should that good things could happen in the future.

The session started like so many games before when The Ton visited Albion And despite Bod trying our players managed to leave the pitch in tact. Abraham had set out to Attack Albion but back fired when MacLean found his form and scored a hattrick with Collins managing to pull one back via a conselation panalty. (Well done on getting promoted Bod, What a come back. You certainly deserved to go up)

Next was a trip to champions Peterhead and Abraham had to win to keep his job. There was no point in defending so Pete opted to use his home tactics and won in great fashion. Williams started to rout with an excellantly worked goal. Former England International Ripley scored the second before Super Williams added to his tally by rounding of an excellant attack with Peterheads Keeper going walk about. Kirkwood rounded of the 4-0 win with a superb header through a corner kick. (nice league win Dogs, you certainly proved that Turpie is yer b1tch)

A visit to Gretna came up next and both managers needed the win to keep there jobs secure. This day however Abraham came out comfortable victors. prunty started shakely but scored before the break. However Abraham was not happy with his contribution so substituted him at half time with Williams. Super Williams, let loose on a park, is always gonna be difficult to control and he proved this by scoring a hatrick and was looking to score more but opted instead to help Annand score his own hatrick. Final score 7-0 (all the respect for sticking in there Jim. Hope things go better for you next season)

Last game of the season ended in contrivercy since Williams, Collins and Prunty made Abraham a very happy Manager but Turperoonie could not take The Ton finishing above his beloved East W@nks so fixed the game so it would crash and started it up again and again till Morton lost 3-0. So we ended the season 5th instead of the more deserved dizzy hights of 4th place. (Well done Trose. had a few good games towards the end. Hope it continues for you next season)

Thanks for serving an enjoyable season Turperoonie. Hopefully there are many more to come.

Rosco Van Nistelrooy · June 19, 2003

### Game up tonight for shortlisting at 6-30pm. Its preseason so get on early to sort yer shÂ¡t and lets get the next season started ###

Gary Toner · June 19, 2003

The Spiders Web

Welcome to the last edition of The Spiders Web for this season and what a season it has been, Fast and Frantic.

Our form over the season was erratic to say the least, players came players left but the fans stayed through thick and thin and it's unfortunate we couldn't repay them with a better finish.

My assistant manager was in charge of the first game whilst i was around the world trying to snap up some players for next season. I was shocked when i flicked on teletext to read East Stirling 5 - 0 Queens Park but that was nothing to what i was going to feel going into the next game.

We travelled to Forthbank stadium to take on Stirling in what was to be a game of gaffs that would make any player blush and some wonderful finishing from Claque, we looked nothing more than a shambolic sunday league team who had been out on the pÃss the night before. The team that was put out are better than this and i make no excuses of the performance, i do however make a apology to everyone involved with Stirling i didn't mean to wreck the away changing room i hope you can understand it was under some extreme conditions.

Stirling 9 - 1 Queens Park

The board were screaming in my ear about there un-satisfaction, what do i have to do with there sex life is beyond me but we awaited the visit of 3rd Division champs Peterhead in a game i knew deep down i had to win and it was to be a day of suprises as we put last weeks shocker behind us and a on fire Christer George made no mistake as he slotted SIX goals past a helpless Peterhead recent Signing Tam Brighton added to that and defence mainstay Brannigan stepped up to slot home a penalty. After the game they were screams of something "phisy" and mutterings of "phisy as phuck" but we took no notice as we enjoyed the win.

Queens Park 8 - 1 Peterhead

Gretna was the destition for the last game of the season and once again our erratic form paid dividends, well that is if your a Gretna fan. Despite taking a 2 goal lead from Corriea and George some shameful defending and some class finishing cost us as Gretna went on to win.

Gretna 3 - 2 Queens Park

My thoughts on the season are one's of regret and fun, at times we could have done better than we did and as i reflect of some of the mistakes that were made along with the lack-lustre finishing i can only imagine "What If".

No time to reflect on past memories tho as we look towards next season and look to cut out the mistakes i want to thank everyone who turned out week in week out to support us despite our erratic form and to my rival managers all i can it has been a good experience and here's to next season.

On a last note..... I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M STILL IN A JOB!!!!

Gary Toner

theregistry · June 19, 2003

Gable Endies Gaffer Speaks!

The final 4 games of the season, and I survived by my fingertips! Starting away to Stirling Albion the ref was lucky to escape my clutches in the car park after the match. A shambolic display of card happy reffing and my team leaving with a 1-0 loss.

Next up was the long trip south to lowly Gretna, and despite my teams general performance we left with lucky 2-1 victory despite nearly conceding the equaliser minutes from time. Elgin City came calling at Fortress Links and managed to escape with a 1-0 win. Final match was lost 3-0 at home to Morton before the game crashed.

Clearly my team are not scoring enough goals and that department is where I will be concentrating my hundreds of pounds that my ever happy chairman has decided to spend. So Montrose fans, do not worry, new signings are on there way to the club. I aim to take this club to the top in the long term but paitence is required. A top 5 finish next year will give us something to build on in the seasons to come.

dogs · June 19, 2003

#### The Scottish Sun ####

Peterhead gaffer Alex Holligan was today sensationally dragged before the SFA Beaks at their offices at Hampden Park to answer allegations of match fixing.

Before the last 3 games of the season the Blue Toon had only conceded 13 goals in 33 games and had by far the best defensive record in the SD3. The last 3 games of the season saw the team concede an unbelievable 12 goals as they slumped to both Morton and Queens Park where the common knowledge was that if both teams had not got a result against Peterhead both clubs would of sacked their under presssure managers'.

Match reports have shown Peterhead Goalkeeper Derek Souter charging up to the half way line shouting "gies a shot" and "i want a dig at goal" in both games. Alex Holligan has not commented on such facts but said that his Peterhead Team would not lie down to any team.

"We were tired after a long ardous season and after sealing the championship the week before there were alot of tired legs out there. We had nothing to play for and both Morton and Queens Park simply had to win"

When accused of being a "big soft shÃte" Alex Holligan came out with a confusing statement stating

"your either in the game or no, and its far better to be part of the whole set up even if you are pÃsh"

Although we have no idea what that means its been interpretated that the Peterhead Gaffer has had one shandy too many in the last week

Rosco Van Nistelrooy · June 19, 2003

Poor Gaz and Coisty they actually thought they out witted you dogbreath through sheer tactical superiority......mugs!

coisty · June 19, 2003

Hehehehe Yea, we did Heheheheheeh

stevethedog · June 19, 2003

East Fife prove they have what it takes

The only real battle left was to try and secure 6th spot as it was clear Pete had finally got his act together and we werenâ€™t catching 5th placed Morton. Murrays Elgin side however were also determined to pull off 6th spot but a win at Elgins home ground thanks to 2 goals from Stevie Kerrigan. Fifers were now deploying a counter attacking 4-3-3 system that was too good for Elgin City as they fell 2-0 which put the Fifers nicely into that coveted 6th spot.

Now there was a slight hurdle blocking our path to grabbing 6th spot once the 36 games were up. Well actually there was 3 and they came in the form of Albion Rovers (a), Stirling Albion (h) and Peterhead (a). Thatâ€™s the top 3 teams in the league if you didnâ€™t know and the Albions were still playing for promotion.

Soâ€¦â€¦.. away to in form bod, he picked up form again after being defeated by the mighty fifers. We held the wee rovers for 83 mins and created the odd chance ourselves however on after one of bods infamous tactical switches they pulled clear after some slack defending. It was disappointing to lose but a good performance to take into the Stiling game.

I wish I could have seen Ally Shaws face as ex Stirling ace Steve Kerrigan fired the Fifers ahead in the first half. Despite a great first half it didn't turn out to be enough as Shaw's Stirling battled back to a creditble 1-1 draw.

Away to champs Peterhead on the last day of the season. A lot of people turned up to watch Peterhead as they were being accused of match fixing and also to see Dogs; last game in SD3 (not SD2 ally!). It was a boring 0-0 as bnth defences came out on top. I believe dogs was going for the win so I have to take a lot out of the game going into the next season.

I have to admit that I am dissapointed to have finished 7th and I feel if we hadn't had so many injuries and I was changing the tactcs so often we could have done something as we certainly showed a lot of promise and upset all the big teams. There are too many "ifs" in football thuogh and next season I intend to be the force the "delighted" fans want.

Roll on 03-04

June 20, 2003

Alasdair Shaw's Programme Notes. Thursday 19th June 2003

Dear Supporters,

Once again the smell of freshly cut grass and hamburgers returns to footballing stadiums around the country, as we prepare to embark on another season. After our bitter disappointment at ending our last campaign with nothing, I am utterly determined to ensure promotion this time round and have assembled a squad which is more than capable of delivering such targets.

Not surprisingly, some players have moved on to new things over the close season. Allan Moore, Mark McNally and Colin McKinnon have all hung up their boots, while Issac English and Steve McAnespie have both left the club. Young Ross Beveridge has gone to Alloa, Gary Kelly is now with Buckie Thistle and Paul Whitmarsh has been transferred to Elgin City; a transfer which I hope will not haunt me as Kerriganâ€™s did last season.

As a result of this, I was in a position to significantly strengthen the squad and I am delighted to welcome the following players to the Forthbank. Former Leeds, Middlesbrough and England striker Brian Deane will give us another significant threat in attack with his strength, height and experience. Another veteran is Andrew Marriot and the former Wales keeper will provide backup to the number one slot as well as passing on some tips to the younger goalies. Danny Lennon, the man who made the famous score line of Bayern Munich 0 Raith Rovers 1, brings a wealth of knowledge and his influence to the club.

Some of you may know Michael Branch from his time at Everton and Wolves and he is another player who will add to the squad. Iâ€™ve also been keen to add to our youth squad and have secured the promising talents of Steven Folley, an attacker from Aston Villa, Adrian Deane, a midfielder from Sunderland, Kevin McKinley, a winger who joins after a spell with Chelsea and Ryan Amoo, a defensive player who also signs from Aston Villa. Another young signing is goalkeeper David Marshall from Celtic. David looks to be a great prospect but I feel his just a little inexperienced for first team action and I have struck a loan deal with Queenâ€™s Park; who will have his talent for the season, except for games in the cup or against us.

We have also brought in some players on loan and I think that getting Sunderlandâ€™s Scotland international Kevin Kyle could be the transfer coup of the season. Also joining are Liam Miller, a midfielder from Celtic, defender Paul Reid from Rangers and Stephen Schumacher a player who great things are expected of, from Everton.

With such quality available throughout the squad, it came as little surprise to me in learning that we have been installed as the bookmakers favourites for the Bells 3rd Division title this season.

Our preseason friendlies help the team get their fitness levels back up and I was delighted to see crowds of nearly 4,000 turn up for our games against Livingston and Hertha Berlin; attendances which Iâ€™m sure will also please the money men at the club.

As most of you will probably know, the draw for the CIS League Cup 2nd Round has been made, with a mouth watering tie in Aberdeen in prospect for us.

I have to admit that I was dieing for the big kick off and was confident that a win on day one of the season would be forthcoming over Murray Etheringtonâ€™s Elgin. The bookmakers had made us 1-4 favourites and with you fans spurring us into the new campaign, we immediately took the game to the visitors. For the second year in a row we opened the scoring in the league when Clague pounced just 13 minutes into the season and Kyle soon doubled our lead. Elgin had the chance to pull a goal back with Knowles, but thankfully he failed to take the great opportunity which fell to him. I was truly delighted by the way in which my attackers ripped the Elgin defence apart and Clague scored two more in the second half to bag an opening day hat trick and continue his exploits from last season. Steven Nicholas was taken off early into the game with a damaged shoulder, but there appears to be no lasting damage.

The emphatic win put us joint top of the league and was the perfect start to the new season.

As the runners-up of last years Challenge Cup, I am hoping that we can reproduce the excellent form we found in our previous tour of this tournament.

The 1st round paired us up with 2nd Division outfit Stranraer and I was once again confident of another win. It wonâ€™t shock many to learn that it was Clague who stole the show as he opened the scoring with a close range header. Nicholas then scored a scrappy rebound to give us a two goal cushion at the interval. We totally dominated over the visitors and when Clague made it 3-0, we had booked our passage into the next round, a game with Raith Rovers.

The last time we went to Pete Abrahamâ€™s Morton a defeat ultimately cost us the chance of promotion, so we had a bit of a score to settle with our hosts. A tactical gamble came in the shape of Nicholas dropping out of the team in favour of an extra midfielder, an approach which paid off. Both sides squandered some early chances and I was relieved to see Williams have a goal chopped off for offside. However we made the breakthrough on the stroke of half time as Kyle found the back of the net. It was an ideal time to strike and Kyle must have demoralised Morton even more with his second goal just after the restart as he fired home a 35 yard screamer. Morton responded by pushing men forward and Smith in goals was forced into making a great save to preserve our highly impressive 2-0 away win. However some bad news came in the shape of Neal Clagueâ€™s dislocated shoulder, and injury which will keep him out for the next couple of weeks.

Weâ€™ve made another great start to the season, having won all our games, scoring nine in the process and weâ€™ve yet to concede a single goal. Iâ€™m really hopeful that weâ€™ll taste success this year and am looking forward to a productive and entertaining season.

Enjoy the game!

Alasdair Shaw, Stirling Albion FC Manager

June 20, 2003

Elgin Evening News

Eye on Elgin City: Preseason Review

Hello Readers,

What a summer! It has been non-stop at Borough Briggs with very little chance even to watch Big Brother. We have been hunting the transfer market for players to come in and boost the squad as well as letting a few of the bit part players leave.

As many of you who came to the games last season will now I prefer to play a 4-4-2 system and I felt that our lack of a quality left full back was cruelly exposed and so I made this position a priority buy. We had our eye on a couple of players and although we lost out on Australian Robertson from Morton due to a work permit we did sign young starlet Charlie Mulgrew from Celtic on a free transfer. I believe that Charlie can do big things in the game and will be a stalwart for Elgin over the coming seasons. We have also augmented the back line with right-sided full back Thompson on a free transfer. He is a pacy player who is a welcome addition to the squad.

Our midfield flanks needed a bit of beefing up in my opinion and this was compounded by us letting a few youngsters go, who we felt had not progressed in the manner that we would have liked. So priority was a right-sided midfielder to give cover and competition to Fraser Brebner, however original target Issa again agreed terms but was not granted a work permit so we began our search again. After a few showings last season Alex Benjamin had caught the eye and we managed to tempt him away from Gretna for a fee of Â£6k . I have also managed, although this has yet to be 100% confirmed, to sign young Peter Flynn from Celtic on a season long loan. Flynn is an exciting young winger who will not only add some depth to the left flank but will also push current holder David Craig for his jersey.

Finally in the attacking department there has been many changes. Just after the departure of Trevor Benjamin â€“ who returned to Leicester after his loan spell we have all lost Subiat whom retired at the end of last season. I know this decision will come as a shock to many fans but I am sure you will all join me in wishing him all the best for the future. This left us with only 2 strikers at the club who, in my opinion, have the quality to play in the SD3. Therefore the hunt was on for new talent to shake things up. However although I managed to get Ellis Remy, from Wimbledon, and Kristopher Myles, from Albion Rovers in on season long loans as well as negotiating the Â£4k transfer of Paul Whitmarsh from Stirling Albion, all of these players did not manage to get registered in time for the big match. So young Alex Knowles was drafted in from the under 18s to play.

I am sure you will agree that the squad has certainly improved from last season with more quality for each position and it still leaves us around Â£10k in the pot and the chance for one or two new loan signings in the winter. Rest assured that I will continue to scour the country (and beyond) for signings to help strengthen the squad and provide cover.

PS A star buy will be arriving in January to help the defence.

Powerful Stirling Pummel Elgin

â€˜Elish Performance Ends In Rout.

We awoke this bright morning to the sound of birds chirping in the trees and the smell of freshly cut grass â€“ it was Saturday. But not just any Saturday, it was the start of the football and we were on the bus heading for Stirling and Elginâ€™s first game of the season. We were in buoyant mood, a few new players were signed and the manager certainly could talk a good game â€“ even though we knew that we were facing, arguably, the best side in the league this season. However we began to get nervous when Sportsound announced that we had a mini injury crisis and that 17yr old Alex Knowles would play his first competitive match for us up front. We were right to get worried.

Stirling is a huge side and they lined up 4-3-3 with physical strikers Kyle and Deane either side of the deadly Clague. Things did not look good after the first free kick was hit long into the box and Deane won his header with easy. Our central defenders where having a torrid time and it was not long before Stirling had gone one up â€“ and it was that man Clague who supplied the finish from a Deane knock down. We went 2 down shortly after when no one picked up Kyle at the near post and deftly flicked his header into the net. Things were looking grim. Then in the 42nd a chance for Elgin, Porsteinsson had made the keeper make a good save but the ball bobbled loose to Knowles who contrived to miss from 4 yards and an open net. That proved to be our final attack.

At half time Etherington mad some changes, taking off both ineffectual central defenders â€“ however that did little to stop the flow. Clague scored two more to bring up his hat trick and even had the chance to showboat near the end. At the end I feel that we were lucky to get away with the scoreline at the end. Stirling looked awesome â€“ however our lack of defensive awareness was very suspect and maybe Etherington has to look at his tactics?

It must be remembered that one game does not make a season so hopefully we can put this down to a one off and with the new strikers joining maybe we can mount a challenge. Not holding our breath though.

Final Score: Stirling 4 Elgin City 0

The Brigg Boys â€“ Elgin City Fanzine

Elginâ€™s 5 Star Showing

A great performance by both Porsteinsson and new striker partner, Albion Rovers on loan striker, Myles left poor Gretna stunned last night. In a one sided affair, that both managers were sent to the stand for the second period, the latest members of the growing band of Borourgh Briggs Boys helped to turn Elginâ€™s possession into goals. 2 for Myles, one for Porsteinsson another from Craig and a screamer from Rattray were enough to see the black and whites progress in to the second round of the Challenge Cup, where they now face the daunting task of playing Albion. At the end of the game Elgin manager Murray Etherington was obviously delighted. â€œI was very pleased with the performance tonight, we have worked on a few things in training and bring in the new players up front has also helped a great deal. I donâ€™t think you can take anything away from these lads, after Saturdayâ€™s thumping, they have come back in great fashion.â€ Ask what the stramash at the touchline with Gretna boss, Jim Hastie, was all about he declined to comment only saying that â€œIt was nothing real, Jim and I get on greatâ€¦..noo get that mic oot oâ€™ ma face or ah wull ****in dae you, ya bassâ€

Final Score: Gretna 0 Elgin City 5

Daily Record â€“ Score Magazine

Cowed-and-beaten

Cowdenbeath frustration at late refereeing decision

In an action packed match, the first home game of the season for Elgin, Cowdenbeath were the visitors. As predicated Etherington kept the same 11 from the midweek mauling of Gretna and they once again produced the goods. After only 3mins powerful Icelandic forward Porsteinsson calmly slotted past the helpless Cowdenbeath keeper. A couple more chances were created by the hard working black and whites midfield before Thompson, a close season signing, made a colossal error of judgement. He decided to head the ball back to his keeper but left the header woefully short which was pounced upon by and was smashed into the top corner of the net. This was the score at half time and it was a surprise to see Thompson out for the second period. He did not last long and neither did the stalemate with McMillan replacing the hapless fullback and Myles breaking the deadlock. It was quick break from Elgin with Porsteinsson exploiting the space in behind the defence by latching on to a lofted through ball. Instead of going for glory, he drew the keeper and squared the ball to the in rushing Myles to smash the ball into the empty net. The game looked as though it was going to fizzle out as Elgin switched to a defensive formation after a scare. However controversy reigned in the 82nd minute when McMillan passed the ball back to Pirie in goal who, instead of thumping the ball out or up the field, smashed it across goal and straight to Cowdenbeath who gladly accepted the gift. Etherington was furious but Stewart Robertson was obviously delighted. Although once we reached the end of the game it transpired that the referee had actually ruled the goal out for offside. A stranger decision will not be seen in Scotland this season (or for a few seasons) but, in the end, it was the correct result. A furious Etherington had some stern words at the end of the game for his players and scoreline but after visiting the refereeâ€™s office he was, understandably, ecstatic. â€œIt was a strange end to the game and I do feel a bit for Cowdenbeath who had thought that they had secured a point. At the end of the day though we merited the victory and it would have been a travesty had we drawn that game.â€ Asked what he though of the new Cowden manager â€œI wish Stewart all the best, he looks to have a decent squad available to him and if he can get a bit of organisation together he could be a real handful.â€

Final Score: Elgin City 2 Cowdenbeath 1

The Sun â€“ Scottish Division 3 Review

$Lambie\'s Lovechild$ · June 21, 2003

Rovers Fans Desperate for Derby Day

With the heroics of last season out of the way, Albion Rovers fans have been wondering what manager McGuinness is going to do next. Having taken an unfancied squad and made them into promotion winners, it was widely expected that with a transfer budget of nearly Â£20,000 , he could bring in players of a calibre sufficient to take Rovers to the heady heights of mid table mediocrity, and more importantly , settle (for one season anyway) the ongoing lanarkshire feud that is Coatbridge V Airdrie.

On the incoming front, fans were surprised to see very little movement. Freed East Stirling midfielder David McPherson was brougth in , along with promising keeper Brian Hamilton, but with no fees involved, and the out-door showing no signs of letting up (Yardley , McAllister , Dick , Bradford , McStay & Myles(on Loan)) the fans wondered if the manager had truly lost the plot.

Then came the signings theyd been waiting for. Loan deals for 12 months, but players of real quality, desperate to show off their talents in a first team environment. From West Ham came talented young centre back Ezy Iriekpen to add a little steel to a backline which still lacked a degree of experience, but not degree of ability. And to challenge Stirling and Mercer for the wide left slot came Robert Wolleaston from Chelsea. The pacy little winger will ensure that the complacency which crept into Mercer's game near the end of last season will not be repeated.

With these new starlets in place, Albion set out to conquer division 2 .... starting at home to their old adversaries , Division 3 champions Peterhead

Albion Rovers 2 - 0 Peterhead

Scarcely could anyone believe this was the same Peterhead team which had destroyed all in its path. Gone were a huge portion of last seasons starlets, released after the job was done, or sold for pitiful fees to lower division teams. And on the park, it seemed to show, as a lackluster Blue Toon failed to spark , almost as though they hadnt had the time to gel as a unit, whilst Albion , with Charlie "The General" McLean marauding up front seemed able to get off shots on goal at will. Despite a first half in which Peterhead were awarded a dubious penalty for some pushing and shoving in the box, they never looked like seriously threatening Albion in the second half, and goals either side of half time by McLean sealed a great start to the league campaign.

Elswhere , Forfar picked up a 4-0 away win, showing early that they would be title contenders.

Forfar 0 - 0 Albion Rovers

Forfar had started this match as red hot favourites according to the bookmakers, and it showed as right from the off, they pounded the albion goalmouth. Only some superb defending from Iriekpen , and some outstanding goalkeeping from Shearer kept the scorelines level, with one particular one handed save from Shearer earning him the man of the match award. With 90 minutes on the clock, and the scores level, Albion's counter attacking football almost paid dividends , with a sweeping move through the middle resulting in Ian Mackie ghosting in from the right and sweeping a shot low past the Forfar keeper. Alas , it wasnt to be as the linesman raised his flag and ruled the goal offside. A creditable away draw for Bod & his troops, and the North Lanarkshire derby looming in the distance.

Elsewhere, Hamilton , beaten 4-0 the previous week by Forfar , proceeded to win 4-0 themselves , showing there will be no easy matches in Scottish Division 2 this season.

Sun Exclusive - Turpie overtakes Barry Fry

Statisticians everywhere were delighted today to be able to announce that with his 238th signing of the season , East Stirling manager Ross Turpie has finally overtaken the all time signings record held previously by Peterborough chairman and football legend Barry Fry. The fact Turpie has achieved in 2 seasons what Fry took 27 years to do makes the achievement all the more amazing. When asked to comment on this , Turpie smiled and said "Aye , well , the board have backed me on the wages, and we move on as many as we bring in, usually to the dole queue. By the way, i see yer 16yr old son can kick a ball quite well, would you be interested in signing him up for a trial ...... "

The Scottish Football League is apparently carrying out an investigation to see whether any connection exists between Turpie and the agent who represents 234 of the players which Turpie has signed. Both parties have declined to comment further on the matter.

Rosco Van Nistelrooy · June 22, 2003

### SHIRE START SEASON 2 ###

A fresh start and new beginning would see some fresh faces and some old leave, as stalwarts Brian Irvine and Peter Grant hung up their boots and made way for the youth. The Shire kids were eagerly chapping at the bit to stake their claim for 1st team action. Pre-season had gone well with 6 friendlies being played with relative success as no losses were recorded. The team was fit, ready and raring to go for the forthcoming campaign.

The board expected the development of youth to continue and a respectable mid-table position to obtained. With no finance and poor wages the challenge would be difficult, as most the better platers were signing for more glamerous and richer clubs, but boss Turps was confident that a top 6 finish would be secured and we would push the promotion favorites hard all the way. Squad wise the team had strength and depth, was youthfull and had bags of experience despite the departure of Peter Grant, Brian Irvine and Razor Ruddock. Some great loan deals had been done for cover and would play their role in the 1st team. Player like Leon Osman from everton, Jamie 'Smudger'Smith and Ton McParland from Celtic and Norwich's Chris Llewellyn.

PLAYERS OUT

Robert Dunn - Free to Montrose

Mark Slater - Free to Montrose

Razor Ruddock - Free to Queens park

Kevin McCann - Released

David MacPherson - Released

Chris Bladwin - P/X to Falkirk

Pat Clark - Free Transfer to Morton

Chris Todd - Free Transfer to Morton

Graeme McLaren - P/x ICT for Paul Ritchie

PLAYERS IN

Andy Legg - Experienced veteran left Back signed on a Free Transfer from Cardiff

John Henry - Experienced Midfielder P/x with young Chris Baldwin

Marvin Robinson - Young striker from Derby signed on a free

Jimmy Gibson - Young AMC signed from Rangers on a free

Paul Ritchie - P/x deal with ICT for Graeme Mclaren

Paul Bernard - Experienced DMC signed on a free from the Pilgrims

14 youth players were also signed for the U18 squad mostly regens or unknown teenagers. Stuart Shearer,Ian Martin,Steven Marshall,Scott Stewart,Paul Russell,Graham Patterson,David Robertson,Kevin hughes,Graham Dale,Gary Burns,Steven Boyle,Gary Alexander,Scott Brady & Craig Clark all agreed terms.

Here's how our opening games went, a good start and two good clean sheets!

2.8.03 EAST STIRLING 4 Dumbarton 0

Shire's opener was at home thankfully and would see Kenny'scots' make his Clan debut. The Sons of the Rock were not so might as they crumbled 4-0 and had Barry Donald sent off as the Shire easilycontrolled the game. Dumbarton failed to trouble Shire as they Scored 4 great goals through a Dean Cooper Double, Paul Kane strike and Jamie Smith goal. It would take Kenny time to settle and find his feet in the competitive Scots 3rd division.

Dumbarton 1 EAST STIRLING 0 (Challenge Cup 1st Round)

Scots would have his revenge as some key players were rested and untried youth were given their chance only to fail against the 'Mighty Sons of the Rock'. A solitary strike was the difference in scrappy close game at the Rock Stadium. The Challenge Sup was a mickey mouse competition any way as the League was the most important competition. Any way good luck to Kenny and His first win in the Clan and hopefully the 1st of many, not against the Shire *fingers crossed*

9.8.03 Montrose 0 EAST STIRLING 0

Sandy Thomson's Trose had improved greatly since last season as his fresh approach and blend of fresh faces and playing style caused Shire problems. Both teams were well organized and hard to break down. Shire's Young striker Marvin Robinson missed an empty net in the 'Van Vossen' mould late on in the 2nd half after some sloppy Trose defending. He was forgiven though as his match sharpness was not great and a good away point had been secured at a very difficult venue.

### Extracts from the FALKRK HERALD ###

Furious East Stirling gaffer hit back at reports of fowl play and comparisons to flambouyant manager Barry Fry. Turpie explained, " we have 69 players now on our books, I know thats a bit of a mouthfull for most but we still have room for a few more key 1st team players as we are Â£1400 under our overall wage budget. A lot of the duds have been moved on and the majority of Shire players are just young kids, which bodes well for the future". Only a few experienced players have joined Shire this season as most the quality free players available have opted to ply their trade at bigger 'Glory' clubs in the division. Gaffer Turps stands buy his 'strategy' and transfer policy, He claimed, "Its not our fault the rival gaffers are lazy and naive when it comes to scouting and finding new talent and value. We have a great scout in Dave Colley, and a good young squad which will improve, with the right players in the right places to fit our system and style of play. We might not have any big names at the club , but at least we get tore in un-like some of the leagues 'Big-time Charlies"!

Jimbhoy · June 22, 2003

A New Season.............A New Hope

We made 67 signing bids during the close season with a grand total of 5 signings made.

and so the coming season doesn't look too hopeful.

We opened up with a home game against Morton a team we lost 7-0 to late last season. It was good to see that we had tightened up at the back and a well deserved 0-0 draw was achieved. We played Elgin in the Challenge Cup and after going 2-0 down went for all out attack, sadly this coincided with some underhand tactics from the oppostion who decided to evict me from the stadium for no apparent reason. (Northern hospitality hmmmmmmph). Without sny interaction from either manger the AI played out a 5-0 defeat. Our final game of the night was against East Fife and with a more normal tactic another tight defensive perfomance was achieved although we lost 1-0.

We have therefore played 3 games and once again the problem of scoring goals is the main Gretna problem. I'm away now to work on some new tactics.

ALL WE ARE SAYING......IS GIVE US A GOAL

MLC

Rosco Van Nistelrooy · June 22, 2003

richard thomson · June 22, 2003

Hi troops i hope all is well in scotish clan land???? has anyone managed to over take the dog myster or is he still top dog(sorry)

June 22, 2003

WOW Jims not bottom any more

June 22, 2003

Itâ€™s cut throat stuff just the way I like it. Itâ€™s going to be a hard season for my Cowdenbeath side but I hope to have a few players next game in place.

To be honest I think Stirling have this season in the bag. We will see and with 12 Human players of which ten are in the third its fantastic fun playing real people and not the crappy Ai managers.

Sav.

$Lambie\'s Lovechild$ · June 22, 2003

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by richard t:

Hi troops i hope all is well in scotish clan land???? has anyone managed to over take the dog myster or is he still top dog(sorry)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Check out the Division 2 table. Theres your answer

Rosco Van Nistelrooy · June 23, 2003

### Game Announcement ###

Due to a family engagement I cannot get out of Tonights session (monday 23rd ) has been cancelled. sorry lads hope yes understand

Rosco

Jimbhoy · June 23, 2003

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by jeffduke:

WOW Jims not bottom any more<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Early days Jeff, early days.

$Lambie\'s Lovechild$ · June 23, 2003

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by TURPS:

### Game Announcement ###

Due to a family engagement I cannot get out of Tonights session (monday 23rd ) has been cancelled. sorry lads hope yes understand

Rosco<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

For "Family Engagement" read "Mrs Rosco has put her foot down, and Rosco's had his erse felt"

coisty · June 23, 2003

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by Lambie's Lovechild:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by TURPS:

### Game Announcement ###

Due to a family engagement I cannot get out of Tonights session (monday 23rd ) has been cancelled. sorry lads hope yes understand

Rosco<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

For "Family Engagement" read "Mrs Rosco has put her foot down, and Rosco's had his erse felt"

When you going on holiday Turperoonie?

June 23, 2003

Dumbarton's Progress Report Coming Soon.

Having A Crappy Time Removing Every Second Word So It Is Suitable For The Whole Family To Read.

I'm Also Having A Sh*tty Time At Work So I'll Not Be Online Much This Week, So Hopefully There Aint A Session On Thursday.

Thanks

Your Rumour Mole

$Lambie\'s Lovechild$ · June 24, 2003

BTW Rosco , i can recommend a good plastic surgeon to remove that Thumbprint from your forehead if you want.

June 24, 2003

Thumb Print you should know better steviebod its stilletoes or nothing fur oor man turps.

June 24, 2003

Thumb print or no thumbprint you all know itâ€™s just no worth upsetting the other half. Ok Iâ€™m not married yet so I have some negotiation leeway but once that ring is on that finger face facts lads your life as an individual making decisions is over because upsetting them is a fate worse than death.

I can see it now

Rosco

â€œSorry love I canâ€™t take you out tonight Iâ€™ve got a game of Cm4 to play and the lads are counting on meâ€

Wife

â€œ thatâ€™s ok by meâ€ followed by that look (you all know it)and her walking out the door.

Followed by The next five days being a living hellâ€¦â€¦. .

Sav.

Rosco Van Nistelrooy · June 24, 2003

LOL, it was my 2nd wedding anniversary! And if i played the clan game and CM its was gonna end in a divorce, now no one can say i dont love my champo but when it comes to the crunch what would you all do? Nae wonder theres a few wee fat baldy virgins in the clan..thats all i'm saying.....

Powlay · June 24, 2003

married two years TURPS and yours still a virgin...i think your doing something wrong...didnt know you were fat and bald like mate!

Rosco Van Nistelrooy · June 24, 2003

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by Powlay:

married two years TURPS and yours still a virgin...i think your doing something wrong...didnt know you were fat and bald like mate! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

HAHA peewee powlay are ye allowed to shag in your American wannabee Christian Sect?

Powlay · June 24, 2003

*runs away before it turns into a mocking match*

richard thomson · June 24, 2003

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by Lambie's Lovechild:

BTW Rosco , i can recommend a good plastic surgeon to remove that Thumbprint from your forehead if you want. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Rosco i can't beleive your getting abuse from stevie bod of all people!!!!

$Lambie\'s Lovechild$ · June 24, 2003

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by richard t:

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote">quote:<HR>Originally posted by Lambie's Lovechild:

BTW Rosco , i can recommend a good plastic surgeon to remove that Thumbprint from your forehead if you want. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Rosco i can't beleive your getting abuse from stevie bod of all people!!!!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Over the years Ricardo, you learn when to listen and when to shut up. As a result, you learn to see the openings and where to deliver the "Coup De Grace" .....

I got promoted last season by signing 2 players. Rosco didnt after signing 38. Hence , Bod has the bragging rights , for this season anyroads.

So whits your good self doing back here? ... managed to stop greeting over the Ipox Exodus, and come here to find some like minded weeping old firm fans?

Or , as ever , are you just trying to find Jinksy and wind him up aboot the whole Edinburgh United thing?

June 24, 2003

Originally posted by TURPS:
LOL, it was my 2nd wedding anniversary!QUOTE]

2 years? FFS mate you can get less than that for armed roberry these days.

Al

Rosco Van Nistelrooy · June 24, 2003

HAHA Lads very funny.......

Its easy to laugh..Its easy to hate...It takes strength to be gentle and kind.....

chris101 · June 24, 2003

awww how sweet turps whats next your gonna campaign for womens rights lol

richard thomson · June 25, 2003