The Race for the Whitehouse

[canvey!!]

Primary 29
Alaska

The Australian, 25th October 2008

It’s unsurprising that there is still no change at the top of the United States Presidential leaderboards, and despite Magnus Vestergaard’s ascension, Giuseppe Rossi of the state of Arizona remains first in the Republican polls. He accumulated a decent ten points this week, less than a third of his Utahan competitor, but enough to keep him 7 points in the lead.

Meanwhile, Kansas Governor NepentheZ sits rooted to the top of the table, and unlucky candidate Jeremy American is almost out of the Race in third. With Michigander Robert Boyle bearing down on the 43-year-old from second, the pressure is increasing for him to keep his first-placed spot. 14 points next week for ‘theZ means that the Ohio Governor American has no chance of being the Democrat nomination, a stark contrast from when he led the polls in April and May.

Unfortunately, family man and Colorado Governor Little Clinton Jr. recorded a score of 0 meaning that his Presidential campaign is hanging by a thread. Despite a statement from his funders yesterday backing the 45-year-old, he only remains in the Race due to a little-known rule that if the final standings are less than 10 points in difference, a vote is cast to determine the nomination. Mikey Twigge also had a bad week, and while his campaign is still alive, he needs to turn in a supreme performance in Hawaii in order to win the nomination.

The poll results from Alaska in full.

The Republicans

  Username    Club             Base Bonus Score Sum Security
  SCIAG       Chivas USA        10     –    10  483 Stable
  magvest     Real Salt Lake    17   +16    33  476 Stable
  mikeytwigge Los Angeles Galaxy 6     –     6  471 Stable
  corinthiano Colorado Rapids   15    x0     0  458 Secure

The Democrats

  Username      Club              Base Bonus Score Sum Security
  NepentheZ     Kansas City Wizards 9     –     9  460 Secure
  Robert_296    Toronto FC          7     -     7  455 Stable
  PaulHartman71 Columbus Crew      11     -    11  443 Stable

[PaulHartman71]

almost out of the race /o\, not looking good, will have to hope for some dramatic sackings

[Robert_296]

Only 5 points off first. I can do it!

[NepentheZ]

secure
top

[mikeytwigge]

second time in a row everyone gave me one point

[canvey!!]

Primary 30
Hawaii

The Honolulu Star-Bulletin, 26th October 2008

Judgement time is upon us. Or at least it is upon the seven candidates all vying for their parties’ nomination for Presidential runner. With one final Primary this week in Honolulu, they are fighting it out for that enviable position. Democrats Robert Boyle and Jeremy American are favourites for this week, however the Ohio Governor will have to put in a very strong performance to turn this week to his advantage in the final standings.

Republican Little Clinton Jr. is almost out of the Race, and has slipped from a hot favourite before his famous fling to a candidate almost as notoriously bad as Magnus Vestergaard has been. However, the Real Salt Lake manager stands a chance now, and with him being just seven points off top spot, he stands a good chance if he can argue well on Relations with Russia (Foreign Policy). Otherwise, he’ll be hoping for a slip-up from perfectly-poised Giuseppe Rossi, the ex-army general from Arizona.

While a sound aggressiveness in a debate will be fundamental for the candidates such as Jeremy American and Little Clinton Jr., who have fallen by the wayside, that will do them no good if they fail to cover their own bases, and as a result, each and every candidate is expected to be aiming for a sturdy defence, and the candidate that does “Concede the least goals” will have a fine base upon which to mount an attack. Even the poll leaders know that they cannot afford to concede those goals that could send them second, and potentially out of the Race.

The formbook predicts Los Angeleno Mikey Twigge to have another bad week, that being his third in a row. However, Little Clinton Jr. of Colorado Rapids experienced his first non-score last week and it is possible that he suffers that again, while NepentheZ’s double-nine from the past two weeks means that that is a possible score today, putting Robert Boyle’s target at just 4 to qualify for a vote while he cannot qualify outright.

Although all candidates can still be the nomination of their party, some have it easier than others:

  P Username      Manager          Current Minimum Maximum
  R SCIAG         Giuseppe Rossi     483     489     504 !
  R magvest       Magnus Vestergaard 476     482     497
  R mikeytwigge   Mikey Twigge       471     477     492
  D NepentheZ     NepentheZ          460     466     476 !
  R corinthiano   Little Clinton Jr. 458     464     479
  D Robert_296    Robert Boyle       455     461     475
  D PaulHartman71 Jeremy American    443     449     463

! = Can become nominee without a vote

It’s all to play for in this final Primary and the Hawaiians will be watching intently. Their vote determines the two potential Presidents.

~

Location: Hawaii
Subject: Relations with Russia
Focus: Foreign Policy
Guest Speaker: None
FM Objective: Concede the Least Goals
Bonus: (x2) – Robert_296, PaulHartman71

Writer’s Notes: Only votes from your own party are doubled. Fun fact for you: Microsoft Word has just told me that there are too many grammatical/spelling errors in my 169-page document to continue displaying them. Easter Egg, anyone?

[mikeytwigge]

i dont stand any chance tbh its between sciag and magvest

[PaulHartman71]

I don't have a very good chance at all, but I'd love to do the best that I possibly can regardless!

[canvey!!]

Primary 30
Hawaii

First up was an old grudge match: fighting it out to overturn Republican leader Giuseppe Rossi, the Colorado Governor Little Clinton Jr. and Utah Governor Magnus Vestergaard were going to begin the debates in Honolulu. The form backed Vestergaard, but home advantage backed the Colorado Rapids manager. Vestergaard’s debate started with a wish not to repeat the Cold War and he continued by detailing American accountability. Unfortunately for him, Clinton Jr.’s argument “The Russians need to stop being gits” went down better with the Hawaiian delegates, and the 45-year-old won 1-0, conceding 0 with Vestergaard conceding 1.

Next up: Giuseppe Rossi himself as he sought to stop any advance that his predeccesors had been attempting. He faced Robert Boyle, who himself was aiming to push his neck up above NepentheZ to win the Democrat nomination. Things were tense, and this was evident on the part of the Republican Governor of Arizona, who instantly saw his argument crumbled by Boyle, who was in front 1-0 due to a Chad Barrett goal. Giuseppe Rossi strained to produce a stronger argument: that the Cuban Missile Crisis is something should be avoided, but Boyle’s second goal came as he blew that argument out of the water as an obvious statement designed to appeal to idiots. Rossi’s final blunder was to suggest a subject dedicated to Russian studies in schools, at which point Boyle successfully got the entire audience to laugh. Boyle instead suggested stronger exchange links to facilitate international learning about the Russians without forcing it on students. Boyle had soared to a 3-0 lead, yet his first blemish came when he said that Russia was a country on the grow. Although a minor point, the well-tuned Rossi fired back that their population was increasing. Another error like this from the Michigander meant that although Giuseppe Rossi had conceded 3 goals, Boyle had still conceded 2.

The candidates and delegates, exhausted from the cross-party battle, took a break for lunch. NepentheZ got himself in an awkward social situation after talking to the organiser of the Luau feast put on for the candidates: after being told that Poi was called “two-fingered” or “three-fingered” according to how many fingers you would use to eat it depending on its consistency, the Kansas Governor used his fingers to eat it. There were frowns of confusion before it was explained that nowadays it isn’t eaten with fingers. Robert Boyle sat in the corner eating all of the Haupia while Mikey Twigge got a limpet stuck to his head from the fresh Opihi dish. It wouldn’t move, and he put on a hat to wear in the second half of the debates.

Jeremy American would commence the second half of the debates and he did so with his argument on the Economical benefit of a stronger alliance with Russia. With so much of Russia’s coastline aptly-placed to ship goods to the United States, trade on the West Coast could benefit significantly. The Columbus Crew manager talked about the possibility of aiding Russia in having a more transparent system of government. While the idea of a heavy American involvement in foreign affairs knocked one mark against the Ohio Governor, he still won his debate 3-1.

Next up was another Democrat: leader NepentheZ. He strode casually onto the stage. His opponent was the Democratic mayor of Honolulu: Mufi Hannemann. He began to speak as to why there was no benefit of relations with Russia, but found Hannemann’s speech overwhelming, and the mayor made compelling arguments contradictory to NepentheZ’s. First on one area, then on another, then on a third. With a 0-3 loss inflicted against him, the Kansas City Wizards manager slinked off the stage, shellshocked.

Mikey Twigge would steer the Republicans to a relatively easy, although rather meaningless, win. If he conceded any less than 4 goals, they would take the state of Hawaii. He started his debate well, but got phased as he noticed something oddly peculiar about his opponent. After the point was made that no preferential treatment should be given to any country, which gave the California Governor a 1-0 lead, he realised that his opponent was…Lawrence Lazewski.

Mikey Twigge: You’re…you’re Lawrence, aren’t you?

Lawrence Lazewski: Er…what?

Mikey Twigge: It’s you, isn’t it! Lawrence Lazewski!

There was a gasp from the audience. Several members of the Secret Service protecting the candidates placed their fingers on their guns.

Lawrence Lazewski: I don’t know what you mean.

The 38-year-old Californian moved towards Lazewski, as if to tear off the moustache that was part of the disguise. However, the ex-Governor of Texas was too quick for him, drawing a gun from his pocket and firing into Twigge’s stomach. Mikey Twigge crashed backwards onto the stage while Lazewski turned and darted, a torrent of carefully-aimed bullets flying after him. He made down the actor’s exit of the stage of the theatre in which they were debating, and a brace of agents followed him. Another two attended to Twigge.

The fact that he had a sympathy vote from the audience gave him a second goal. However, he conceded a goal in the form of a bullet, and he won 2-1 with 1 goal conceded. Yet there were more important things than that, and than the Republicans winning the state 1.25-2.00 and having a 21-30 final defecit, as Twigge was taken to hospital and a score of the Secret Service tracked down Lawrence Lazewski in the theatre...

The Republicans

  Username    Manager            Club               C
  mikeytwigge Mikey Twigge       Los Angeles Galaxy 1
  corinthiano Little Clinton Jr. Colorado Rapids    0
  magvest     Magnus Vestergaard Real Salt Lake     1
  SCIAG       Giuseppe Rossi     Chivas USA         3

The Democrats

  Username      Manager         Club                C
  PaulHartman71 Jeremy American Columbus Crew       1
  Robert_296    Robert Boyle    Toronto FC          2
  NepentheZ     NepentheZ       Kansas City Wizards 3

The Voting
Voting as it has been the past two weeks, please. PM it to me depending on your party.

If you are a Republican,

Republicans
3 points:
2 points:
1 point:

Democrats
3 points:
2 points:
1 point:

If you are a Democrat,

Republicans
4 points:
3 points:
2 points:
1 point:

Democrats
2 points:
1 point:

The deadline is Saturday, 25th April at midnight (BST). Last Primary votes, make them count!

[PaulHartman71]

hmm, had an almost perfect week, although I'm still of the opinion it's too little too late.

[Robert_296]

Sent mine in. Hopefully I can get 6 more points than Nep. Especially with my x2.

[mikeytwigge]

people i just got shot surely that deserves sympathy votes

[Robert_296]

yeah I'm sure a dead guy would be a good president

[mikeytwigge]

i didnt die i was just injured read the report

[magvest]

Votes are in. Very interesting results, the republic voting seems quite open now...

[Robert_296]

people i just got shot dead surely that deserves sympathy votes

maybe you should read the report

[mikeytwigge]

i didnt mean to say dead

[Robert_296]

yeah I did read it it was just you said you were shot dead so the sympathy vote wouldn't quite work

[SCIAG]

Conspiracy! Conspiracy! Conspiracy!

Neppo and I both conceded 3 goals!

Votes being prepared.

[SCIAG]

Anyway, well done magvest, you've already won tbh.

[Tomaldinho]

Nep and Rossi both blow it on the last day

This is good stuff!

[canvey!!]

I don't have votes from NepentheZ or corinthiano.

[PaulHartman71]

I don't have votes from NepentheZ or corinthiano.

Mon Nep not getting his votes in on time!

[mikeytwigge]

i need corinthiano to vote because otherwise their wont be enogh votes to realistically move me back into contention

[SCIAG]

Actually, I have a chance if those two don't vote...

[mikeytwigge]

you will win if they don't if they do it will be magvest

[NepentheZ]

Mon Nep not getting his votes in on time!

FO

Votes are IN

[mikeytwigge]

comeon corinthiano i need you to vote. It was between me and you early on we cant let these two upstaarts beat us

[Robert_296]

Thought nep had missed it but it is midnight not midday

[canvey!!]

FO

Votes are IN

Received. corinthiano has a very high total but he won't be getting any of it if he doesn't vote.

I sent him a reminder PM considering he missed the last votes but should I break from tradition and send him another one?

[Robert_296]

He hasn't been on since the 21st so a PM reminding him probably won't do much good as I guess he would check this as one of the first thnigs he does when he comes online.

[canvey!!]

I'm beginning to think that the idea of voting if there's less than 10 points is unfair on the winner. What do others think?

[Robert_296]

Does that mean that if myself and Nep are within ten points then Paul would just decide our nomination? If so I don't think you should use that idea.

[SCIAG]

I didn't see the "10 point re-vote rule". I don't know tbh, it's up to you.

[canvey!!]

Writer’s Notes: I have decided against the 10-point rule. I didn’t think that it would be this close at the end, and as a result I’ve dropped the rule as it would be unfair on the winning candidates.

Primary 30
Hawaii

BBC News, 3rd November 2008

Clyde Navisan: The Race for the Whitehouse in the United States of America has been an interesting one. The introduction of a new method of election, encouraged by the uncertainty over George Bush’s 2000 win over Al Gore, has been largely successful, and has led not only to attention from Political candidates to overlooked states, but also to overlooked issues. With a rigid timetable and specific debates, bonuses and Guest Speakers, the Race has been exhilarating and the results are finally in.

From here, the United States public, if they have registered to vote, will be able to do so for the two candidates that will be running, one Democrat and one Republican. Although he had a good week in Hawaii, Utah Governor Magnus Vestergaard, vying for that Republican nomination, fell just short as he managed 2 points less than his nomination-winning rival. He plodded along in last place for much of the campaign, however a dramatic surge in the closing stages made his attempt for the Presidency much more valid. He fell just behind the Arizona Governor, who had been top of the tables for some table, Giuseppe Rossi. Despite an uncertain start, Rossi was the only clear Republican nomination, with any others enjoying sporadic spells at the top. That leaves Mikey Twigge in third, five points behind Rossi, and after Colorado Governor Little Clinton Jr. failed to secure any points in the island state, he falls bottom.

Tomaldinho of Illinois had been the favourite for the Democrat nomination and despite an end to his long reign at the top of the Democrat polls, he bounced back before the withdrawal of his finances in October, only two weeks ago. From then, NepentheZ of Kansas has been leading the polls but with his rivals inching in on him, was there a chance of an upset in the final Primary in Hawaii?

Meanwhile, Lawrence Lazewski, suspected of the murder of Democrat Winston Walcott in May, has been apprehended by the Secret Service, but not before shooting Republican Californian Mikey Twigge. Twigge is said to be in a stable condition in a hospital in Honolulu, and will be able to leave in 7 days, giving hope to the 38-year-old of still being able to run as Giuseppe Rossi’s Mate.

It was, of course, NepentheZ, who secured the Democrat nomination on the final day. Although he achieved 7 points from Hawaii, his closest competitor, Robert Boyle from Michigan, only got 2 more with 9, and fell 3 points behind the Kansas City Wizards manager. Jeremy American enjoyed the best week of any candidate, but with him being so far behind in the Democrat polls, his 17 points weren’t enough for him to finish any better than 3rd, 7 points behind NepentheZ.

With the nominations decided and without any deviation from the past few weeks’ leaders, attention now turns to the evening of November 5th, where NepentheZ and Giuseppe Rossi will be expected to announce their Running Mates. Whichever candidate succeeds to office will have this Running Mate as their Vice-President, so it has a high value for all of those candidates who didn’t quite make it.

The Republicans

  Username    Club               Base Bonus Score Sum Security
  SCIAG       Chivas USA           5     –     5  488 Stable
  magvest     Real Salt Lake      10     –    10  486 Very Insecure
  mikeytwigge Los Angeles Galaxy  12     –    12  483 Very Insecure
  corinthiano Colorado Rapids     21    x0     0  458 Very Secure
  spartans5   FC Dallas            -     -     -  371 Out Primary 23
  JSalter     San Jose Earthquakes -     -     -  216 Out Primary 13
  frithleeds  Houston Dynamo       -     -     -    0 Out Primary  3

The Democrats

  Username      Club               Base Bonus Score Sum Security
  NepentheZ     Kansas City Wizards  7     –     7  467 Stable
  Robert_296    Toronto FC           7    +2     9  464 Precarious
  PaulHartman71 Columbus Crew       13    +4    17  460 Precarious
  Tomaldinho    Chicago Fire         -     -     -  456 Out Primary 27
  Romanista1994 D.C. United          -     -     -  424 Out Primary 26
  Benjaminoo    New York Red Bulls   -     -     -  167 Out Primary  8
  Walcott’s W.  New England Revolution     -     -  157 Out Primary  6

The Running Mates
Both NepentheZ and SCIAG are now obligated to pick a Running Mate. You will need to Private Message this to me, while the World waits in suspense. Here is a list of non-eligible candidates. You are free to pick any other candidate. However, bear in mind that your Running Mate needs to be in the Playoffs to score, so if one candidate has a non-scoring RM while another has a scoring one, the latter is going to benefit. However, I am not going to tell you who is in the playoffs so you will have to determine it from a mixture of Job Security and Past Performances.

Not eligible:
SCIAG/Giuseppe Rossi as he is running for President.
spartans5/Lawrence Lazewski as he is in police custody.
JSalter/James Salter as he is corrupt.
frithleeds/Matheau Frith as he has retired from running for President.
NepentheZ/NepentheZ as he is running for President.
Benjaminoo/Benjamin Franklin as he is ill with cancer.
Walcott’s Wonderkids/Winston Walcott as he is, tragically, dead.

[PaulHartman71]

oh well, 7 points away isn't at all that bad, more than happy to finish behind the two people that I finished behind tbh. Good luck Nep, make us proud!

kutgw canvey!!, been a fantastic sign up so far, lets hope that the closing stages run smoothly

[magvest]

Gratz SCIAG, i would probably have won if Corinthiano had voted, but you deserve the nomination mate!

Kutgw canvey!

[Tomaldinho]

Almost beat Paul having taken part in 3 less primaries

Ended up very close on both sides, well done lads

[NepentheZ]

I have selected my Running Mate

[SCIAG]

All three would make good running mates for different reasons.

Can I pick a Democrat?

What will the Running Mate Process involve? Simply winning matches in the playoffs, or will there be a non-FM aspect?

[canvey!!]

Can I pick a Democrat?

I was wondering if anyone would ask that, and yes you can. In the World of Politics I'm sure it isn't common, though .

What will the Running Mate Process involve? Simply winning matches in the playoffs, or will there be a non-FM aspect?

I'm going to do reports on the playoffs and it is up to the users who will be voting to decide on their Presidential vote.

[mikeytwigge]

so close yet so far. Remember i always backed you sciag

[SCIAG]

Right, I've decided against a Democrat candidate.

magvest was runner up and pushed me close.

mikeytwigge was performing well in the league at the last update.

corinthiano's status is "secure", whereas the other two are "insecure".

Tough choice, but I'm as ready as I'll ever be. PM in the post, canvey!!

[NepentheZ]

Bet we picked the same guy

[Robert_296]

Guess Nep's isn't a Democrat then :/

[SCIAG]

Bet we picked the same guy

If so, we both know who to blame

(And it isn't the candidate)

(Or Canvey!!)

(Or each other)

[canvey!!]

The Race for the Whitehouse

The New York Post, 6th November 2008

The two candidates running for the President of the United States, Arizona’s Giuseppe Rossi and Kansas’s NepentheZ, announced their running mates at party conferences yesterday. It was a rather surprising decision from both candidates, as neither chose arguably the strongest candidates, and favourite for NepentheZ’s nomination, Illinois Governor Tomaldinho has not been selected, neither has strong Republican Little Clinton Jr.. When asked to justify his decision, NepentheZ, 43, said ‘Tomaldinho’s a great guy but he isn’t who I’d want as my running mate. He looked set to win the nomination but he’s too much of a leader to play second fiddle’.

NepentheZ instead opted for the relative minnow, Jeremy American. Born in Ohio in 1969, he hails from Columbus and finished as the third-placed Democrat in the polls. With his financial support sinking beneath him, NepentheZ cannot rely on the funds, although neither could those funds be secured with any of the other three potential running mates. When questioned, NepentheZ said

‘I chose Jeremy for his foreign policy strengths and his sophisticated logic. I’m an adventurous person, and to work with such a logical analyst will really help. We can combine his solidity with my flair and perform extremely well as the leaders of this great country.’

Giuseppe Rossi, running as the nomination for Republicans nationwide, argued similar reasons for his appointment. His available candidates were slightly more limited that NepentheZ’s, with only the three active candidates to choose from. He could have chosen family man Little Clinton Jr., but decided against it because he felt he needed someone to balance his ‘adventurous personality’, not to contribute to it. For the same reasons he turned down his close competitor Magnus Vestergaard and opted instead for Mikey Twigge. When asked for an insight into the workings of the mind of such a prominent politician, he stated

‘As well as being a cool-headed guy to contrast my passion, his knowledge of the Economy will be vital during this turbulent financial time. With my Public Safety specialism, and his Economic one, we can deal with two of the greatest problems facing the United States today.’

But have the candidates stabbed themselves in the foot with their political nominations? Here’s the final MLS standings, and neither of the running mates qualifying for the playoffs, on which all of the four finalists will be judged by the American public. Fortunately the two Presidential candidates qualified, top as well, but joining them in the playoffs, of note, will be Chicago Fire and Colorado Rapids, both eligible running mates. However, neither NepentheZ nor Giuseppe Rossi should be too downhearted by this. Having both chosen poor running mates, they won’t find themselves losing out to the other at the end of the day. Instead, the competition becomes a whole lot more exciting as the candidates will be judged on their merit alone. Plus, it gives the tournament’s organisers less to write up.

Neither Jeremy American nor Mikey Twigge have had the best of fortunes in the recent Primaries, aside from the political perspective. Only last week, Twigge was assaulted, shot through the stomach, by ex-fugitive ex-candidate Lawrence Lazewski, already awaiting trial for the murder of Winston Walcott from Massachusetts. American has broken his leg, and has also broken his arm during Lazewski’s escape, meaning three of the candidates found themselves in the 43-year-old’s warpath. The broken leg is close to healing, while the arm will need yet more time.

Only time can tell what will happen to these two candidates, accompanied by their plucky running mates. One thing’s for sure: George W Bush won’t be President beyond 20 days next year, and one of these two will be. The future’s bright.

[mikeytwigge]

cheers for choosing me shame i didnt qualify for the playoffs

[PaulHartman71]

literally laughed out loud when I saw that I'd been picked as Nep's running mate, really wasn't expecting it

[SCIAG]

Who did make the play offs? I knew mikey was doing well so I thought he'd be a decent bet. Maybe I should have gone with corinthiano's job security

[Tomaldinho]

Hold on so Chicago are in the playoffs, but still fired their manager. Literally a disgrace.

[NepentheZ]

literally laughed out loud when I saw that I'd been picked as Nep's running mate, really wasn't expecting it

I love you man. I wanted someone I can trust

[canvey!!]

Who did make the play offs? I knew mikey was doing well so I thought he'd be a decent bet. Maybe I should have gone with corinthiano's job security

Sorry, I meant to post a league table. I'll get that put in and you'll be able to see sometime soon.

[canvey!!]

Final Map

Here’s a map showing states won by Republicans and by Democrats.



Writer's Notes: The league table's edited into the post above, by the way.

[SCIAG]

So I shouldhave gone for corinthiano

[canvey!!]

The Race for the Whitehouse

The Washington Post, 8th November 2008

The Presidential candidates have edged ever closer to crunch time, having completed their Playoff Semifinals against teams from their own conference. NepentheZ’s Kansas City Wizards were in action against Chicago Fire, which makes it ever so fortunate that the 43-year-old didn’t choose Tomaldinho as his running mate. The first leg, at Chicago’s Toyota Park, ended 0-0, which was a fair result. Neither team played better than the other, and although goals were possible, goalkeeping was decent and the 7 shots on target spread over both teams were all saved or cleared.

Meanwhile, Giuseppe Rossi wasn’t so fortunate in the West. His opponent was on some kind of rampage, and looking to add a third victim to his attacks: Lawrence Lazewski from Texas. It could be argued that Rossi’s Chivas USA team had the better of the play, but they already found themselves 0-2 down before they finally got a goal. FC Dallas won the tie 3-1 after a penalty. However, Rossi would be at home in Arizona for the next match, where a 2-0 win would see him take the tie to extra time and or penalties.

However, the second leg would be easier for NepentheZ, with no deficit to overcome. His Kansas City Wizards team scored after just 6 minutes, and the hero Herculez Gomez scored a further two to secure himself a hattrick. This was peppered with a goal from Jimmy Conrad just into the second half, which gave the 2-0 advantage that seemed so small given the final 4-0 result, knocking out Tomaldinho’s Chicago Fire.

There was quite a bit of work for Giuseppe Rossi, but if FC Dallas could win 3-1 at home, why couldn’t Chivas USA? The first goal came in the 32nd minute from Sasha Victorine, while the last goal came in the 32nd minute from Sasha Victorine. The 1-0 win wasn’t good enough, and it probably wasn’t fair, given the ease with which Lawrence Lazewski’s old team had controlled the game.

In the other games, New York Red Bulls beat New England Revolution 2-1 on aggregate after a 1-1 draw in Massachusetts, and Houston Dynamo, the former team of Matheau Frith, went through over Colorado Rapids 4-2 after a 2-2 draw in Commerce City, leaving NepentheZ as the only surviving manager: Little Clinton Jr., Giuseppe Rossi and Tomaldinho having lost. Lawrence Lazewski would be keen to add Matheau Frith to his hit list while NepentheZ would face the former team of ill candidate Benjamin Franklin.

The Democrats

          Chicago Fire 0-0 Kansas City Wizards
    New York Red Bulls 1-0 New England Revolution
                        -
   KANSAS CITY WIZARDS 4-0 Chicago Fire
New England Revolution 1-1 NEW YORK RED BULLS

The Republicans

             FC Dallas 3-1 Chivas USA
        Houston DYNAMO 2-0 Colorado Rapids
                        -
            Chivas USA 1-0 FC DALLAS
       Colorado Rapids 2-2 HOUSTON DYNAMO

[SCIAG]

Isn't that the wrong way around? (The labels of the tables, I mean...)

[canvey!!]

You are right, SCIAG .

[canvey!!]

The Race for the Whitehouse

NBC News, 15th November 2008

Debbie Rae: The political adventure that has been the Race for the Whitehouse is about to reach its conclusion, and as a special treat, our political correspondent Cal van Disney is here in the studio today. Cal, can you tell us a bit more about the last few days in the political world?

Cal van Disney: Yes I can, Debbie. It’s been an exciting few days, viewers, and the final stages of the Race for the Whitehouse are being staged. In just one week’s time, the Race will finish and the polls will open. Two nights ago, two ex-candidates competed in the Battle of Texas. Matheau Frith, I’m afraid, fell as the third victim of Lawrence Lazewski as his Houston Dynamo team lost 2-3 to FC Dallas. It was a tight game, Debbie, yet FC Dallas were crusing at one point, 3-1 up despite being at Dallas’s home stadium.

They struck first, of course, with Roger Levesque opening the scoring on four minutes. Although Dynamo dragged the scores level with a penalty, Levesque struck again and then Dax McCarty added a third just two minutes after Levesque’s second, leaving the home team trailing 1-3. A 53rd minute goal from Brian Ching wasn’t enough to escape from a place on Lawrence Lazewski’s hitlist for the defending champions, and Matheau Frith joins Winston Walcott, Jeremy American, Mikey Twigge and Giuseppe Rossi.

Debbie Rae: Thank you Cal. Now, today was another source of action as Presidential forerunner NepentheZ played in his match against New York Red Bulls.

Cal van Disney: Absolutely right, Debbie. Benjamin Franklin’s former team were the opposition for NepentheZ’s Kansas City Wizards side. The Community America Ball Park was the venue, and it was packed with over 10,000 spectators who watched NepentheZ secure a solid victory that sends him into the MLS Final. New York may have been said to have had the better of the shots, but they didn’t have the better of the match, Debbie. It took them extra time to do it but the Wizards got the win they deserved.

They were already 1-0 up by the time New York Red Bulls’ Dave van den Bergh scored, with American Herculez Gomez having scored in the 16th minute. The match stayed level until minute one hundred and thirteen, when a Duke Hashimoto goal flew in. NepentheZ and Lawrence Lazewski will square off in the MLS Final. It’s a bit unusual, as you’d expect the two candidates to be there, but one of them is and he’s looking for a win to elevate him to the Oval Office.

Debbie Rae: NBC News will keep you up to date viewers! Thank you, Cal.

Cal van Disney: Thanks Debbie.

Debbie Rae: Now, the Space Shuttle Endeavour launched today at the…

The Republicans

      Houston Dynamo 2-3 FC DALLAS

The Democrats

 KANSAS CITY WIZARDS 2-1 New York Red Bulls

[NepentheZ]

Oh yeah. Going strong

[canvey!!]

The Race for the Whitehouse

The Kansas Informer, 24th November 2008

Kansas’s very own Presidential candidate NepentheZ triumphed last night over the belligerent Lawrence Lazewski. In a gripping MLS Final tie in Massachusetts, home of New England Revolution, Kansas City Wizards and FC Dallasbattled it out under the evening sun.

It was a tense game, and it was 11 minutes in when Herculez Gomez sent Democrats all across the country wild with excitement. However, only eight minutes after that, dreams of a better President were almost dashed with a Kenny Cooper goal. What followed was a mud-fest, a slanging match, and both of the teams had a player sent off. For NepentheZ, centre-back Sergiy Fedorov got himself a second yellow, while Lawrence Lazewski’s young Josh Lambo flew off in a flurry of foul-mouthedness after a second yellow for the goalkeeper.

That didn’t stop the goals however, with the Democrat once again edging infront, this time from an Iván Trujillo goal. The candidates took a break, having been worn out by the debate so far. When they resumed, it didn’t take Lawrence Lazewski long to fire back, Roger Levesque scoring from close range in the 49th minute. Would NepentheZ be another victim of Lazewski’s? The match was closed out with little more action.

To say NepentheZ triumphed in the face of adversity would be an understatement. With only three shots in the entire match, his team scored two of them, while Lawrence Lazewski had to settle for scoring two of his 18. Kansas City Wizards bossed possession, as they always do, but at the end of the day it was pure composure that won out as the penalty shootout got underway.

Lawrence Lazewski’s team went first, and David Wagenfuhr scored. NepentheZ followed, Carlos Marinelli putting the spot kick away. Up stepped Kenny Cooper for FC Dallas. Despite having scored in this match and being the league’s second-top goalscorer, he blazed his over the bar. Claudio López scored, putting the pressure on the Toros. Although Roger Levesque scored his, as did Thomas Gravesen, and Anthony Wallace scored what could have been FC Dallas’ last kick of the game. To win it, all that Iván Trujillo needed to do was score.

And he did.

With NepentheZ triumphing against such odds and power of corruption, democracy takes a small cheer. It isn’t a big one yet, because as we all know, the American public heads to the polls, and only then can we breathe a huge sigh of relief when Kansas Governor NepentheZ becomes President!

Writer’s Notes: This article is rather obviously biased due to it being from a Kansas newspaper. Don’t take it too seriously! All subsequent action will take place in the ‘Vote for your CSE President’ thread, so watch that!

[canvey!!]

The Race for the Whitehouse

Writer’s Notes: I won’t be reporting on the states that didn’t vote. Let’s just assume they don’t exist.

CNN News, 28th November 2008

Matt Lewis: Welcome back to our election day special. We’ll have all the coverage of this year’s election day where Republican candidate Giuseppe Rossi is trying to conquer Democrat NepentheZ in the Race for the Whitehouse. First in CNN’s special coverage, let’s head over to Republican HQ in Washington, D.C. where it’s make or break time for the candidates. Our reporter Lenny Scaivad is there.

Lenny Scaivad: Here we wait for the first three of today’s results to come through. Each state is important but some are more important than others, and to began the process we have the poll results from Alabama, Georgia, Vermont, New Hampshire, Connecticut and Rhode Island.

…

Lenny Scaivad: And there is a universal sigh as hands go up to foreheads with the news that arch-rival NepentheZ has won these first six states. With results coming in next from Arizona, California, Delaware and Maryland, surely there has to be some Republican gains. Listen up here…and the Republicans have gone ahead after winning Arizona and California, unsurprising seeing as that is the territory of candidate Giuseppe Rossi. But NepentheZ has won Delaware and Maryland to keep a solid lead.

Matt Lewis: Well thank you Lenny, and NepentheZ takes an unsurprising lead, eight states to two. Fourteen states remain, so there is everything to play for, especially considering that the Presidency of the United States is up for grabs. Next, we go over to New York where Penny Spenny is at the Democrat HQ. Penny?

Penny Spenny: Yes, Matt, and we await excitedly the results from Minnesota, Wisconsin, Utah and Nevada. The first two are easily winneable by the Democrats yet it’s the reverse for the second two. Here come the results now…and as expected, NepentheZ has won Minnesota and Wisconsin but Giuseppe Rossi has won Utah and Nevada. That puts NepentheZ 10-4 ahead. Next, Idaho, Montana, Iowa and Nebraska announce their candidate, which could be the chance for Rossi to bring it together again.

…

Penny Spenny: NepentheZ builds on his electoral college advantage. Giuseppe Rossi won Idaho and Montana, worth 7, but NepentheZ has claimed Iowa and Nebraska, worth 12. He leads, and there are only 12 states remaining for Rossi to attempt to stop this 12-6 deficit. Next, the results from West Virginia and Virginia…and Rossi has won those two, bringing it to 12-8 with just 10 left.

Matt Lewis: Thanks Penny. Back to Lenny at the Republican HQ in the nation’s capital.

Lenny Scaivad: If NepentheZ wins four more states he wins, and results from Kansas and South Dakota are next up….and Giuseppe Rossi has won them, putting him only 10-12 behind. Illinois and Alaska go next, which could put NepentheZ that one step closer…it does! NepentheZ with the advantage as Texas, Oklahoma, Ohio and Pennsylvania announce their votes. This could be split, but that would still put Democrats into the Whitehouse.

Matt Lewis: Back to Penny as the Democrats prepare for the news that could move them into the Whitehouse…

Penny Spenny: NepentheZ has done it! Ohio, Pennsylvania, Texas and Oklahoma have all voted in his favour! NepentheZ will be the next United States President. Michigan and New Jersey announce…they’ve voted for Giuseppe Rossi, but it isn’t enough and NepentheZ will find himself in the Whitehouse!

Matt Lewis: Congratulations to NepentheZ. We’ve got more news and reactions coming up after this short break…

[SCIAG]

So close yet so far

Congrats Nep, you'll make a great president!

Edit: So in terms of individual nominations, it was 8-6 to Nep?

[PaulHartman71]

heh, without me changing my mind at the last minute to stay loyal to Nep then it would have been a tie if it was 8-6 to him

[canvey!!]

No - sorry, it was 9-6 to NepentheZ - I must have forgotten someone .

[Tomaldinho]

Well played Democrats, it was a one horse all the way if we're honest about it

Now where's my reward for staying loyal I wonder...

[SCIAG]

You would both have been rewarded far higher if you had voted for me. I'm let down by corinthiano and mikey too

[canvey!!]

The Oath of Office

It’s inauguration day and the NepentheZ and Jeremy American need to take the Oath of Office. PaulHartman71 needs to post:

‘I, Jeremy American, do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter. So help me God.’

After this, NepentheZ needs to post:

‘I, NepentheZ, do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of the President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.’

Once that is done, we will have the new President of the CSE Forum!
Speeches are welcome but not necessary.

[PaulHartman71]

‘I, Jeremy American, do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter. So help me God.’

[NepentheZ]

‘I, NepentheZ, do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of the President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.’

Hell yeah. I knew I made the correct choice in you PH

Thanks everyone that voted for me, this is a great honor.

[canvey!!]

Congratulations, Mr. President.

Just a conclusive post to come and then the Race for the Whitehouse will be over forever!

[canvey!!]

The Race for the Whitehouse
The Victory Lap

As we look back on the sign-up, a lot of writing has been involved. The decision to break the sign-up up into 30 tasks plus made it more extensive than the Appentice. So much so that a while ago Microsoft Word stopped giving me automatic spelling and grammar mistakes (i.e. the red and green lines). Let’s look at the word counts, and this was a team effort, considering that a large number of your speeches are here too. This includes those, but doesn’t include this post itself, any posts where I’ve asked for votes, etc., and it doesn’t include the opening few posts of the Voter Registration thread. Post and View Counts don’t include that thread either. P.S. Can you give this thread a rating if you liked it? 10 ratings + will show an average one.

2 days, 22 hours, 40 minutes plus of game time

65,899 words
326,440 characters (without spaces)
79,568 spaces
8,095 lines
185 pages
2,831 paragraphs

870 posts from 19 posters
8,415 views

~

Praise for the Race for the Whitehouse

‘Great sign-up, as expected’
‘This is genius’

Tomaldinho

‘Excellent updates canvey!!. Your research into this is what makes it. Brilliant work.’

NepentheZ

‘You have me craving more’

SCIAG

‘An amazing update’

corinthiano

~

With Thanks

NepentheZ

PaulHartman71

SCIAG

mikeytwigge

magvest

Robert_296

corinthiano

Tomaldinho

Romanista1994

spartans5

JSalter

Benjaminoo

Walcott’s Wonderkids

All who registered to vote and others who posted

Wikipedia, for all the information, without which the reports would have been skeletal

dafuge

Sports Interactive

‘I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of the President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.’

Fin.

My Sign-Ups: A compendium

Year(s) Name                        Winner     Second
   2008 The Apprentice: FM Edition  Robert_296 Mikel LUFC
2008-09 The Race for the Whitehouse NepentheZ  SCIAG
   2009 60 to One                       ?        ?

[Tomaldinho]

Was a mammoth effort Canvey that's for sure, a great sign-up and will be a front runner in the CSE awards no doubt. It seems you still had a passion for the write-ups even in the latter stages which is where so many sign-ups drift off and fall away, so congrats on keeping the effort levels consistent throughout!

My rating: 9/10. Not a perfect 10 because I was robbed plus I've just noticed you used Wikipedia as your sources

Roll on The Apprentice 2009??

[PaulHartman71]

fantastic sign up that wouldn't have worked without all of your efforts canvey!!, as Tom said, even at the latter stages you continued to deliver the same quality in updates, which is something I especially find hard to do (being consistent with updates).

It was an honour to be the running mate and vice-president, well done canvey!!

[SCIAG]

Such a shame that this has finished.

Well done canvey!! and Neppo.

Give it a rating if we liked it? What if we didn't? This is a biased sample, dammit!

10/10.

[canvey!!]

You misunderstood "rating". If you go to the top of this page there's an option to "Rate this Thread" .

[Robert_296]

Great signup Canvey!!. Updates were consistently good and the 60 to one signup looks equally good. Thank you.