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Thread: Manager Quotes discussion thread

  1. #1
    Joe - SEGA
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    Default Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Every few weeks on the FM website we will be taking a look at some of the most humorous quotes to come from the mouths of some of the games most notorious managers.

    Check out http://www.footballmanager.com/index...manager_quotes.

    If you want to discuss any of the quotes or add any of your own favourite quotes from the world of football then here's the place to do it...

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    what about the Rangers supporter who said to Jock Stein '' you only won the European Cup coz you had 5 protestants in your team ''

    Big Jock replied '' well you's have 11 , so whats your excuse ?? ''

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Surely Gordon Strachan can't be topped! My personal favourite is definitely where a reporter asked Gordon in what areas he felt that Middlesbrough had been better than his Southampton team - Gordon replied "that big green one out there"!! Class!

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    john collins said after a 0-0 game

    " if we had scored a goal we would have one"

    all scottish managers

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by drmanley View Post
    Surely Gordon Strachan can't be topped! My personal favourite is definitely where a reporter asked Gordon in what areas he felt that Middlesbrough had been better than his Southampton team - Gordon replied "that big green one out there"!! Class!
    Haha, another Strachan classic . I must admit I didn't see that one when I was looking for all his finest comments.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    I see Ollie Holloway's been covered quite deeply already. I suspect there will be one for José Mourinho to come?

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Next up should be 'Appy 'Arry, followed by Keano

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by 4457 View Post
    I see Ollie Holloway's been covered quite deeply already. I suspect there will be one for José Mourinho to come?
    In terms of this though Holloway is a legend!! Some of the stuff he comes out with has me in bits!

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Trond Sollied: "Crisis? In Iraq there is a crisis, not in Bruges"
    "Ristic is like a potato, you can plant him anywhere on the field"

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Ron Atkinson is a legend.

    'It was that boring I switched over to watch Porridge on the other side.'
    'I would not say that he (David Ginola) is one of the best left wingers in the Premiership, but there are none better.'
    'They've come out at half time and gone bang.'
    '[Phil Neville] was treading on dangerous water there...'
    'I've had this sneaking feeling throughout the game that it's there to be won...'
    'I would also think that the replay showed it to be worse than it actually was.'
    'I think that was a moment of cool panic there.'
    'Beckenbauer has really gambled all his eggs.'
    'If Glenn Hoddle said one word to his team at half time, it was concentration and focus.'
    'They must go for it now as they have nothing to lose but the match.'
    'Woodcock would have scored, but his shot was too perfect.'
    'He's not only a good player, but he's spiteful in the nicest sense of the word.'
    'Tony Adams - he's the rock that the team has grown from.'
    '...and he [Peter Schmeichel] extends and grows even bigger than he is.'
    'They've done the old-fashioned things well; they've kicked the ball, they've headed it...'
    'They've picked their heads up off the ground, and they now have a lot to carry on their shoulders.'
    'Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.'
    'He sliced the ball when he had it on a plate.'
    'I'm afraid they've left their legs at home.'
    'The keeper was unsighted - he still didn't see it'
    'Zero-zero is a big score.'

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Jimbokav1971 View Post
    Ron Atkinson is a legend.
    And of course, that infamous comment he made on telly about a french defender!

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    haha those Gordon Strachan quotes are good

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Further Strachan gold

    Reporter: Bang, there goes your unbeaten run. Can you take it?
    Strachan: No, I'm just going to crumble like a wreck. I'll go home, become an alcoholic and maybe jump of a bridge. Umm, I think I can take it, yeah.
    Reporter: This might sound like a daft question, but you'll be happy to get your first win under your belt, won't you?
    Strachan: You're right. It is a daft question. I'm not even going to bother answering that one. It is a daft question, you're spot on there.
    Reporter: Gordon, Do you think James Beattie deserves to be in the England squad?
    Strachan: I don't care, I'm Scottish.

    Reporter: "Gordon, can we have a quick word please?"
    Strachan: "Velocity" [walks off]
    Strachan was on Sky on Sunday morning. He saw John Terry's goal and said he was impressed that Terry goes up expecting to score. He contrasted this to Claus Lundekvam the Saints central defender who goes up for every dead ball and never ever looks remotely like scoring. He said if there was a dead body lying in the penalty area the ball would hit it on the head several times a season which he said is more than Lundekvam can manage. He said referees should book Lundekvam for timewasting every time he goes up for a corner. When the co-commentator said if Lundekvam was watching Strachan was only joking. Strachan assured him he was deadly serious.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    "Why do you want to sign Zidane when we have Tim Sherwood?" - Blackburn Rovers owner Jack Walker. 1995.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Jimbokav1971 View Post
    Ron Atkinson is a legend.
    I was going to cover Big Ron next - you've beaten me to it

    So, you've been left with Sir Trevor Brooking for your next installment. He's come out with some classics too...

    http://www.footballmanager.com/index...le&newsid=2816

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    THe Celtic fan that allegedly said (when Enrico Annoni was about to be subbed on) "aw naw no Annoni oan anaw noo". Classic.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Moving to the Football Forum.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Bobby Robson and Kevin Keegan are great with this kind of thing.

    "We didn't underestimate them, they were just better than we thought" SBR

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Those Gordon Strachan ones are quality

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Scott W51 View Post
    john collins said after a 0-0 game

    " if we had scored a goal we would have one"

    all scottish managers
    I can't work out if you have messed up that quote or not.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Ebbe Skovdahl - Statistics are just like mini-skirts - they give you good ideas but hide the most important things.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    "Steve, how important and significant was that win?"
    "[It had] zero significance and zero importance"

    "The lad got over-excited when he saw the whites of the goalpost's eyes"

    "It was a very hot potato at the time. We thought we'd put it to bed, but to have it regurgitated now is pointless."

    “He pulled his hamstring and it's the hamstring he pulled last year, it's not good.”

    “We were desperate for a left side, and the videos landed in our lap.”

    Sir Coppell such a genius (though the last two are average).

    Found some more:

    "I really don't know my team yet. I usually find that a quiet hour watching Bonanza or something will make my mind up for me."


    REPORTER:…it’s uncharted waters
    SC: It’s ****** waters. You can quote me on that. It’s smelly and it’s clingy.

    "Well we will have to try and keep eleven men on the field! That in itself can be a test for us sometimes, but Sonko isn't here so we have probably got a better chance!"

    "It's just a game of football. There are 1.2 billion people in India who couldn't give a s*** what happens to Reading."

    On the chance of getting the England job:
    "They keep spelling my name wrong and adding an O on the end!"

    Reporter: Sonko's just knocked Kebe out!
    Coppell: Good, that should liven him up a bit!
    Last edited by SCIAG; 23-12-2008 at 14:32.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by miketheheadlesschicken View Post
    Ebbe Skovdahl - Statistics are just like mini-skirts - they give you good ideas but hide the most important things.
    that's a good 'un, very European

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    there's still some celtic fans who hate strachan's conferences and interviews

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    I love what Muricy Ramalho (São Paulo's manager, he has been elected the best manager in Brazil in 2005, 2006, 2007 and 2008) said when some people complained São Paulo didn't play beautiful football in a Brazilian League match vs Náutico:

    Se quiser ver espetáculo, vá ao teatro municipal
    "If you want to watch a show, go to the municipal theater".


    Maybe not very humorous, but given the context it was funny as he said (and I agree with him) that it's more important to play in a pragmatic way to win the game than play beautiful football and end up losing the game.
    Last edited by PMLF; 23-12-2008 at 21:23.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Bhoy View Post
    there's still some celtic fans who hate strachan's conferences and interviews
    he's a bit buddy, buddy with the media, I guess

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    some people use it as an excuse just because they simply dont like him. 3 titles, cups and last-16's. get over martin o'neill everyone.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by SCIAG View Post

    On the chance of getting the England job:
    "They keep spelling my name wrong and adding an O on the end!"
    Haha thats excellant

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Allardyce said something similar about his name and the England job

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Yeah I know but it works better with Coppello, when referred to in relation to the guy that actually got the England job

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by SCIAG View Post
    REPORTER:…it’s uncharted waters
    SC: It’s ****** waters. You can quote me on that. It’s smelly and it’s clingy.
    I can't stop laughing. Did he really say that? All sorts of new respect.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Can't find the Holloway ones on that site, he has the best quotes too

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Rio_V View Post
    I can't stop laughing. Did he really say that? All sorts of new respect.
    Yes, he did.

    And another:

    (After Glen Little injured his hamstring walking up the stair for the second time in a year)
    "We've asked him to move into a bungalow"

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Some Diamonds from David Pleat!!!


    Pleat: "Ambitious effort from the Brazilian left back...Argentinian rather"
    Peter Drury: "Uruguayan actually"
    Pleat: "South American"

    "As much art as science, as much science as art"

    Pleat: ''The ball was rolling when Fabregas played the ball perhaps that's why they're complaining Peter''
    Peter Drury: ''David it wasn't a free kick it was a drop ball it's allowed to roll''

    During a match between Arsenal and Dynamo Kiev: "Do you know any French words Peter?"

    "I wonder what Christopher Samba would be like in Strictly Come Dancing?"

    Pleat: "I think the wind may have slowed the ball down, and this confused both players"
    Clive Tyldesly: "No it was just an error"

    On Jimmy Bullard laughing with his fellow England subs on the bench: "Probably telling them about his days in the non-league"

    "Of course Ronaldo is Manchester United's key player, but we must not forget Milan's Ronaldo...Kaka" (despite Milan's Ronaldo at the time being, well, Ronaldo)

    "I'm surprised Aragonnes hasn't made any substitutions, perhaps from the bench"

    "Gareth Southgate's got a broad chest, but he's going to have to take it on the chin"

    "Arsene must be giving him [Ramsey] confidence pills, you could do with some of them Clive [Tyldesley]"

    "My dentist is a Spurs fan"

    "He looks like Lewis Hamilton, he races like Lewis Hamilton" (on Theo Walcott's speed)

    "If the ref gave a penalty every time players touched each other in the box, we'd have, well, a lot more penalties"

    "If a player gets punched in the head in the box, that should be a penalty"

    "Sanga and Cliche are going to be receiving a lot of balls now, but hopefully not too deep in uncomfortable areas"

    "Look how heavy the defender's legs are"

    "A few South Americans in this Porto team. Three Romanians and three Portuguese. We should be in for some Samba action tonight"

    "To be fair, he probably struck the ball too well" (on Frank Lampard shooting wide of the goal)

    "A two-footed beaver of a player" (on Wesley Sneijder)

    "He looks a bull of a defender but I have to say he's playing like quite a cultivated bull at the moment"

    "Craig Bellamy definitely runs faster forwards than he runs backwards"

    "I think I'll have to sit on the bench on that one" (when asked to pick a winner between Spain and Russia)

    "Terry Sheddingham"

    "Lovely cultivated player, or is it cultured?"

    "No yellow cards yet, only mustard ones"

    "He decided to go to Korea, probably because of the noodles" (on Gus Hiddink's decision to coach Korea instead of Tottenham)

    "Sometimes the cheapest corners can be the most expensive"

    “There's music playing” (after Portugal scored a goal)

    “It was wild and handsome, high and handsome”

    Pleat: “The Swedish only have ten minutes to do something should they want to stay in the competition”
    Clive Tyldesley: “There’s still 26 minutes left of the match”
    Pleat: “Oh dear I forgot to put my watch back to Swiss time”

    “He's a very young, fresh-faced player, well he's not that young actually, 26 or 27, fresh-faced though, looks like he has just come out of college”

    “With eight minutes left, the game could be won in the next five or ten minutes”

    “They are trying to walk the ball in by heading it”

    “They're changing some of the midget gems in midfield”

    “Isaksson's not had much to do. He must be happy, he’s not been very busy and surprised”

    “There we see the little man trying to scratch the big man”

    “Daniel Anderson's a little ferret of a midfield player”

    “Sergio Ramos was an expensive addition to Spain”

    “These wingers are showing great intervention in invention”

    “Little wide outside right” (meaning ‘right wing’)

    “Of course! Deco has got eyes in the back of his head...I forgot about that!”

    “Moutinho using his weight there - all 5’ 7” of it”

    “Republic of Czechoslovakia”

    "The Dutch will be wary of the big lad pulling off at the back post"

    "He's got the world at his dancing feet" (on Christian Ronaldo)

    "He is a good defender, a fish and chips man"

    "Brian McBride is pound for pound as good as any of the top strikers in the Premiership"

    "This will be the first time we will be two thirds of the way through the match"

    "Ronaldo was coming in behind Ashley Cole there" (on Giggs; Ronaldo had supplied the cross)

    "Great save by Michael Carrick" (on Cech saving from Carrick)

    "And here we have a real movie star menace in that of Didier Drogba"

    "What a swivel and a shot from Redknapp" (On Frank Lampard nearly scoring)

    "I'm not too sure how much you get for winning the Champion's League, but it's definatly 10 million euro"

    "If United get through, they'll play Chelsea or Liverpool, in an all-Premiership tie, which is also an all-English tie, and also an all-British tie"

    "Here we see Tevez's little curly one"

    "There he goes again, doing doggies"

    "The ball is tied to his feet, but where's the string?"

    "Giuly's only 5'6 he's not very tall for a winger"

    "I don't know if that was a good bad one or a bad good one"

    "Manchester should brush past Roma tonight but it won't be easy"

    "The Romans are now disappearing, on the bus, trains or where ever they live"

    "There's Jermaine Defoe, checking the weather on his phone no doubt...he's a lovely boy"

    Clive Tyldesly: "Well, we have a Spanish referee for this all English encounter"
    Pleat: "Yes, well it is hot"

    "Who's coming off? It might be King, he certainly knows who's coming off, but only Ledley knows for sure, so we can't tell you"

    "Carrick will be the deepest of the threesome"

    "Statistics are damn lies"

    "He had to cut back inside onto his left foot, because he literally hasn't got a right foot"

    "Martin kick-your-legs as we used to call him when he was playing for West Brom in the 80s. He went home, ate a few pies, and now he's back and Spurs are grateful for all he's done"

    "He wasn't really trying to score with that shot"

    "Preki quite literally only has the one foot"

    Clive Tyldesley: "This wont be United's biggest win in Europe. They actually won a game 10-1"
    Pleat: "I remember that as a young man, against Anderlecht, wasn't it?"
    Tyldesley: "It was in 1903, David"

    "Robbie Keane does not miss. I can tell you now, Robbie Keane does not miss." Following Robbie Keane's subsequently missed penalty: "He usually puts it the other way"

    "Marseille needed to score first, and that never looked likely once Liverpool had taken the lead"

    "The pitch looks a bit like custard"

    "I always thought Justin Hoyte was right footed but it seems like he has improved his left foot too. He's played well at left back for Arsenal today" (commenting on the match where Armand Traore was playing left back and Justin Hoyte was on the bench)

    "Dennis Bergkamp has been a wondrerful player for Arsenal down the years and I'm sure he'll be a valuable member of the squad for years to come" (on Bergkamp's career after his testimonial match at the emirates)

    "No pain without gain"

    "I would take advantage of this and make the wall stand the full 10 metres back"

    "It looks like he's pulled a rabbit out of the bag"

    "To be offside there must be daylight between the players and there was a little daylight there so the ref has got it right" (on Joe Cole's goal that was NOT dissallowed against West Ham)

    ''Ive just noticed something interesting, the left and right backs have both got long sleeve shirts on"

    "Liverpool have got 9 games in the next 29 games"

    "Of course, Steven Gerrard is one of only a few Liverpool players who never get left out by Rafa. And even he doesn't always get picked"

    "Giggs is enjoying himself in the middle of the threesome"

    "Liverpool are sending a message to the Liverpools and Chelseas"

    Clive Tyldesley: "David, whats your prediction for the match?"
    David Pleat: "Good evening everyone, a lovely night for football"

    Clive Tydsley: "If Babel had scored it would have been the quickest hatrick in champions league history"
    David Pleat: "Was that in the uefa cup?"

    "The sight is in end"

    ''Carrick has got all the ingredients in his recipe''

    "Ronaldo draws a lot of comparisons with George Best, the incomparable George Best"

    "Jonathan Woodgate is telling the bench that he can't deal with the pace of Henry and wants to come off"

    "The Greek commentators are going mad, and they're standing in front of us. Sit down!"

    "I feel like a drunken man who doesn't have a drink. I've never known a Groundhog Day like this and I'll have to go and see the film to find out what it's all about"

    "He's a water carrier, a hard worker, a bit of a dog... a ferret"

    "Bordeaux's champagne country, isn't it?"

    "I think they'll have to throw the kitchen sink at them now a bit. Maybe not the whole sink, with all the plumbing - maybe just the taps for now"

    "He's a local favourite, born and bred in Salford" (On Cardiff-born Ryan Giggs)

    "They’ll be happy with that, but they'd be more happy if it went in"

    "Zola's got two feet"

    "We are now in the middle of the centre of the first half"

    "We just ran out of legs"

    "At this moment there is not a problem at this moment"

    "I was inbred into the game by my father"

    "There's a little bit of a South American touch, if that's not Irish, about this European side, Portugal"

    "That would have put the icing on his start"

    "Pires has got something about him, he can go both ways depending on who's facing him"

    "He's got a brain under his hair"

    "And the steam has gone completely out of the Spanish sails"

    "I've seen some players with very big feet, and some with very small feet"

    "This is a real cat and carrot situation"

    "Winning isn't the end of the world"

    "The man we want has to fit a certain profile. Is he a top coach? Would the players respect him? Is he a nutcase?"

    "He hits it into the corner of the net as straight as a nut"

    "Had we not got that second goal, I think the score might have been different. I’m not sure"

    "Eighty per cent of teams who score first in matches go on to win them. But they may draw some. Or occasionally lose....."

    "A game is not won until it is lost"

    "Stoichkov is pointing at the bench with his eyes"

    "For such a small man Maradona gets great elevation on his balls"

    "Our central defenders, Doherty and Anthony Gardner, were fantastic and I told them that when they go to bed tonight they should think of each other"

    "There's Thierry Henry, exploding like the French train that he is"

    "If there are any managers out there with a bottomless pit, I'm sure that they would be interested in these two Russians"

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by The Rafalution View Post
    I can't work out if you have messed up that quote or not.
    what do you mean?? :confused:

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    "With several players likely to be hors de combat for an indeterminate period, augmentation of the squad is a prerequisite for the perpetuation of our season."

    Harry Smith, Crowborough Athletic manager

  37. #37

    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    This thread isn't complete without some kevin keegan:

    'Nicolas Anelka left Arsenal for £23million and they built a training ground on him'

    'Shaun Wright-Phillips has got a big heart. It's as big as him, which isn't very big, but it's bigger'

    'We deserved to win this game after hammering them 0-0 in the first half'

    'I'll never play at Wembley again, unless I play at Wembley again'

    'He'll also be very dangerous from set-pieces. That means he'll be a threat from free-kicks and corners in the final third of the field.'

    'The Germans only have one player under 22, and he's 23'

    'There's a slight doubt about only one player, and that's Tony Adams, who definitely won't be playing tomorrow.'

    'We have spent three matches chasing a football.'


    'Argentina won't be at Euro 2000 because they're from South America.'

    'I'd love to be a mole on the wall in the Liverpool dressing room at half-time.'

    'It could be far worse for me if it was easy for me.'

    'Discipline is not only very important, it's crucial.'


    'The 33 or 34-year-olds will be 36 or 37 by the time the next World Cup comes around, if they're not careful.'




    there are so many it stops being funny...

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Scott W51 View Post
    what do you mean?? :confused:
    because is it meant to be "if we had scored a goal we would have one (goal)" or "if we had scored a goal we would have won"

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    That one of Strachan's, about them being better on "that big green one out there", has to be my favourite deliberate football quote - though he & Holloway could make up a book's worth of these all by themselves - but I've always found the unintentional ones funnier, where everyone's laughing except the person we're laughing at

    The one of Beckham's, where he was going to get Brooklyn Christened but "he wasn't sure into what religion yet" takes some beating; then there's Big Ron's insistence on referring to the opposition as "Maltesers" during an England vs. Malta friendly (despite the best efforts of his co-commentator to correct him...) and his comment about Barca coach Louis van Gaal that "he thinks defence is just something you build around the bottom of the garden"

    Then there's the legend that is Barry Venison, and his "Skontons" in a Skonto Riga UEFA Cup tie (the city's Riga, not Skonto, in case you're Barry...), and Gabby Yorath's unfortunate voiceover to a shot of a woman in the crowd eating some kind of pie; "I always feel much livelier with some hot meat inside me on a cold night like this"

    I'd still give the prize to Big Ron, for a couple with IIRC West Brom when he was one of the first British bosses to go on tour to China; "We were in trouble, but then we spotted a few chinks in their defence" and "I don't know why the Chinese have a problem with population, they've got the best form of contraception there is - ugly women"

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Non League ones are better tbh

    "The linesman was so old he tripped over his zimmer frame four times in the first half," A frustrated Hailsham Town boss Kenny McCreadie complaining about the referee's assistant after losing 1-0 at home to Three Bridges

    Kenny is a former Boxer from Glasgow. This time last year, he got a 2 month touchline ban (and a caution for assault) for decking an Eastbourne United player. My old boss was a County League referee - he had many tales of attempting to keep Kenny quiet/in his technical area/from invading the pitch

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by daemonic View Post
    Further Strachan gold





    Strachan quote on taking over at Southampton: REPORTER: So Gordon do you think you're the right man for the job?

    Strachan:Nope they should have given it to George Graham i'm useless!!!!

    Class.

  42. #42
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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Some more quotes on the website.

    These ones come from the man, the legend, Mark Lawrenson...

  43. #43
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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Pardew came out with a lot of rubbish last season, though this seems to be about favourite quotes.

    After we lost to Blackpool last season-

    "No disrespect to Grant Basey but we really missed Kelly Youga. Some players have to sweat now to see if they get the chance to repair the damage of today.”

    Before playing Ipswich a few games later-

    Pardew added: "Kelly has been terrific for us but I just felt that Ben's experience in and around the dressing room as well as his play would be important. So it's no slight on Kelly, he's been fantastic, but Ben has that little edge in terms of the knowledge he brings to a football team."

    Never new his best team, always seemed like he picked it out of a hat.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Not so much funny, but bizzare
    I present former Cork City manager: Damien Richardson

    "Whether one is blessed with a prodigious flair for articulacy or merely entrusted with a basic monosyllabic uttering of contentment, the relevance of this coming season will stimulate in every green and white heart at least a temporary escalation in embellished eloquence, so as to allow all an opportunity to express the most wondrous sense of anticipation and excitement that lies within."


    "Whether one possesses the stoical stature of an empirical philosopher or a more mundane propensity for self-gratification, the cataclysmic effect of one’s removal from pole-position in the most senior league in the country could be most injurious."


    "If the remnants of my classical education at the sometimes not-so tender hands of the Christian Brothers of Donore Avenue and Drimnagh Castle serve me correctly, it was that Greek playmaker of old, Epicurus, who stated that ‘the misfortune of the wise is better than the prosperity of the fool.’"


    "The last miles home on a long journey appear unending at the best of times, but traffic congestion when in sight of the homeland only serves to test further the resolve of those concerned."


    "Seven draws is an awful lot. If Bohs (Bohemains FC) had won two or three of those and even lost the rest, they'd be in a wonderful position."


    "I felt there was a lack of definable objectivity about both teams."


    "This is the last and final goal from the Turks."


    "The Russians will be big and strong if you let them be big and strong."


    "Maldini has really regurgitated his career at left back."


    "There was a lack of interdepartmental choreography between midfield and attack."


    "Brian, I know you've got your backbone set in stone."


    "The Waterford player's shot was on target, which is an important aspect of a players shot."

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Reporter:

    Gordon, Agustin Delgado?

    Strachan:

    I’ve got more important things to think about. I’ve got a yoghurt to finish by today, the expiry date is today. That can be my priority rather than Agustin Delgado.

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Reporter:

    Welcome to Southampton Football Club. Do you think you are the right man to turn things around?

    Strachan:

    No. I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job and I said, “No, I think they should have got George Graham because I’m useless.”

  47. #47
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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    no clough makes this thread null and void

  48. #48
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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by cms186 View Post
    no clough makes this thread null and void
    In this case Chris...

    "If God had wanted us to play football in the clouds, he'd have put grass up there." On the importance of passing to feet.

    "Manchester United in Brazil? I hope they all get bloody diarrhea." On Man Utd opting-out of the FA Cup to play in the World Club Championship.

    "I can't even spell spaghetti never mind talk Italian. How could I tell an Italian to get the ball - he might grab mine." On the influx of foreign players.

    "I bet their dressing room will smell of garlic rather than liniment over the next few months." On the number of French players at Arsenal.

    "Who the hell wants fourteen pairs of shoes when you go on holiday? I haven't had fourteen pairs in my life." On the contents of Posh Spice's missing luggage.

    "I wouldn't say I was the best manager in the business. But I was in the top one." Looking back at his success.

    "On occasions I have been big headed. I think most people are when they get in the limelight. I call myself Big Head just to remind myself not to be." Old Big 'Ead explains his nickname.

    "At last England have appointed a manager who speaks English better than the players." On the appointment of Sven Goran Eriksson as England manager.

    "If he'd been English or Swedish, he'd have walked the England job." On Martin O'Neill.

    "Anybody who can do anything in Leicester but make a jumper has got to be a genius." A tribute to Martin O'Neill.

    "The ugliest player I ever signed was Kenny Burns." A Clough complement for a talented player.

    "Stand up straight, get your shoulders back and get your hair cut." Advice for John McGovern at Hartlepool.

    "Take your hands out of your pockets." More advice, this time for a young Trevor Francis as he receives an award from the Master Manager.

    "The Derby players have seen more of his balls than the one they're meant to be playing with." On the streaker who appeared during Derby's game against Manchester United.

    "I only ever hit Roy the once. He got up so I couldn't have hit him very hard." On dealing with Roy Keane.

    "Walk on water? I know most people out there will be saying that instead of walking on it, I should have taken more of it with my drinks. They are absolutely right." Reflecting on his drink problem.

    "I'm dealing with my drinking problem and I have a reputation for getting things done." A comment which speaks for itself.

    "Don't send me flowers when I'm dead. If you like me, send them while I'm alive." After the operation which saved his life.

    "Players lose you games, not tactics. There's so much crap talked about tactics by people who barely know how to win at dominoes." Reflecting on England's exit from Euro 2000.

    "We talk about it for twenty minutes and then we decide I was right." On dealing with a player who disagrees.

    "I want no epitaphs of profound history and all that type of thing. I contributed - I would hope they would say that, and I would hope somebody liked me," On how he would like to be remembered.

    "It was a crooked match and he was a crooked referee. That was a tournament we could and should have won." On the 1984 UEFA Cup semi-final Forest lost to Anderlecht.

    "I'm sure the England selectors thought if they took me on and gave me the job, I'd want to run the show. They were shrewd, because that's exactly what I would have done." On not getting the England manager's job.

    "You don't want roast beef and Yorkshire every night and twice on Sunday." On too much football on television.

    "If a chairman sacks the manager he initially appointed, he should go as well." On too many managers getting the boot.

    "I thought it was my next door neighbour, because I think she felt that if I got something like that, I'd have to move." Guessing who nominated him for a knighthood.

    "For all his horses, knighthoods and championships, he hasn't got two of what I've got. And I don't mean balls!" Referring to Sir Alex Ferguson's failure to win two successive European Cups.

    "I like my women to be feminine, not sliding into tackles and covered in mud." On women's football.

    ''That Seaman is a handsome young man but he spends too much time looking in his mirror, rather than at the ball. You can't keep goal with hair like that." On England goalkeeper David Seaman.

    "I've missed him. He used to make me laugh. He was the best diffuser of a situation I have ever known. I hope he's alright." On the late Peter Taylor.

    "He's learned more about football management than he ever imagined. Some people think you can take football boots off and put a suit on. You can't do that." On David Platt's first season as Forest manager.

    "He should guide Posh in the direction of a singing coach because she's nowhere near as good at her job as her husband." Advice for David Beckham.

    "Barbara's supervising the move. She's having more extensions built than Heathrow Airport." On moving house in Derbyshire.

  49. #49
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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Some new Ron Atkinson quotes up there now...

    http://www.footballmanager.com/index...le&newsid=2995

  50. #50
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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    First part of the Shankly quotes are up now. Second part to follow

    http://www.footballmanager.com/index...le&newsid=3121

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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    I hope the Shankly's classic quote will be in the second : "There are only two teams in Liverpool; Liverpool and Liverpool Reserves."

    Shankly famously said about the offside law, "If a player is not interfering with play or seeking to gain an advantage, then he should be." * Also attributed to Brian Clough

    When Liverpool player Tommy Smith once consulted Shankly to tell him he couldn't play next week, due to his injured knee, Shankly replied: "Take that poof bandage off, and what do you mean Your knee, it's Liverpool's knee!"

    For many years, legend had it that Shankly had taken his wife to a Rochdale game as a Wedding Anniversary treat. Eventually someone plucked up the courage to ask Bill if it were true. Naturally, the great man denied it venomously "Of course I didn't take my wife to see Rochdale as an anniversary present, it was her birthday. Would I have got married in the football season? Anyway, it was Rochdale reserves."

    Shankly was famously competitive in 5 a side matches. Matches in which his talented full-back, Chris Lawler was equally famous for his taciturnity. Bob Paisley was refereeing one day and decreed a goal offside. Shankly argued long and hard, so much so that in the end Bob Paisley asked Lawler: "Chris- you were the last man, was Bill offside?" To which Chris replied "Yes Bob, he was" Shankly exploded with rage. "All these years he keeps his mouth shut, and when he does speak, it's to tell a lie"

    Shankly was once asked how a top star of the 1970s compared to his former Preston North End teammate Tom Finney: "Aye, he's as good as Tommy – but then Tommy's nearly 60 now."

    “The trouble with referees is that they know the rules, but they do not know the game.”

    “If you're not sure what to do with the ball, just pop it in the net and we'll discuss your options afterwards.”

    “If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing.”

    “Above all, I would like to be remembered as a man who was selfless, who strove and worried so that others could share the glory, and who built up a family of people who could hold their heads up high and say, 'We're Liverpool'.”

    “It was the most difficult thing in the world, when I went to tell the chairman. It was like walking to the electric chair. That's the way it felt.”

    “We murdered them 0-0.”

    “Denis Law could dance on eggshells.”

    "You son, could start a riot in a graveyard. "-- (to Tommy Smith)

    "Brian Clough's worse than the rain in Manchester. At least God stops that occasionally"

    "If he had gunpowder for brains he couldn't blow his cap off."

    "Don't worry Alan. At least you'll be able to play close to a great team!" Bill Shankly to Alan Ball after he signed for Everton

    "It's there to remind our lads who they're playing for, and to remind the opposition who they're playing against." Bill Shankly about the 'This is Anfield' plaque

    "Just go out and drop a few hand grenades all over the place son." Bill Shankly to Kevin Keegan

    "Ay, here we are with problems at the top of the league." Bill Shankly suggesting to a journalist that Liverpool were in difficulties

    "Where are you from?" "I'm a Liverpool fan from London." "Well laddie, what's it like to be in heaven?" Bill Shankly to a Liverpool fan

    "Yes Roger Hunt misses a few, but he gets in the right place to miss them." Bill Shankly to a reporter

    "With him in defence, we could play Arthur Askey in goal." Bill Shankly after signing Ron Yeats

    "He couldn't play anyway. I only wanted him for the reserve team!" Bill Shankly upon hearing Celtic's Lou Macari had snubbed Liverpool in favour of a move to Manchester United."

    "Laddie, I never drop players, I only make changes." Bill Shankly to a journalist who criticised his team selection

    "It's great grass at Anfield, professional grass!" Bill Shankly comparing the Anfield pitch to other grounds

    "Hold on a minute, John Wayne hasn't arrived yet." Bill Shankly to the awaiting TV crews and journalists for the press conference to announce he was retiring from football

    "The difference between Everton and the Queen Mary is that Everton carry more passengers!" Bill Shankly

    On awaiting Everton's arrival for a derby game at Anfield, Bill Shankly gave a box of toilet rolls to the doorman and said: "Give them these when they arrive – they'll need them!"

    "At a football club, there's a holy trinity - the players, the manager and the supporters. Directors don't come into it. They are only there to sign the cheques". Bill Shankly on boardroom meetings

    "I'm just one of the people who stands on the kop. They think the same as I do, and I think the same as they do. It's a kind of marriage of people who like each other." Bill Shankly on the fans

    "If he isn't named Footballer of the Year, football should be stopped and the men who picked any other player should be sent to the Kremlin" Bill Shankly on Tommy Smith

    “Ladies and Gentlemen, yesterday at Wembley we might have lost the Cup but you the Liverpool people have won everything. You have won the admiration of the policemen in London and you have won the admiration of the public in London." Bill Shankly after losing the FA Cup in 1971 to Arsenal

    "Chairman Mao has never seen a greater show of red strength." Bill Shankly

    "If you can't make decisions in life, you're a bloody menace. You'd be better becoming an MP!" Bill Shankly

    One of the most iconic images of all was caught on television, when a Liverpool scarf which had been thrown at Shankly during a lap of honour was flung to one side by a policeman, in April 1973, when he and the team were showing off the League Championship trophy to the Kop. Shankly pounced on the scarf and reprimanded the copper, uttering the immortal words "Don't do that. This might be someone's life".

    After his retirement he said: "I was only in the game for the love of football - and I wanted to bring back happiness to the people of Liverpool."

    Shankly told Kevin Keegan in 1971 as Liverpool were playing West Ham United "Christ son, I've just seen that Bobby Moore. What a wreck. He's got bags under his eyes, he's limping. He's got dandruff and it looks as if he has been to a nightclub again". Moore played a blinder during the match but Keegan still scored. After the game Shankly said to Keegan "Aye he's some player that Bobby Moore isn't he? You'll never play against anyone better than him"
    Last edited by Georgik; 10-04-2009 at 12:13.

  52. #52
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    Default Re: Manager Quotes discussion thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Razzler View Post
    he's a bit buddy, buddy with the media, I guess
    Oddly enough, not so much in Scotland, the media up here don't like him much. Anyway he's a cack manager and all the witticisms in the world don't hide that

    Clough came out with some classics.

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