Is anybody else experiencing an existential crisis due to FM?

(Light-hearted post alert!)

This Premier League season is indisputable evidence that we are all living inside an FM game. Ranieri's FM game, to be precise. Or to be even more precise, the FM game of whichever extra-dimensional sentience it was that created the manager character of Ranieri.

Think about it.

With Leicester top, the league standings don't look realistic. But if you assume that we are in a game of FM, then the standings look fine because this sort of thing happens all the time. Real-world 0 - FM game 1

With Chelsea in midtable, the league standings don't look realistic. But if you assume that we are in a game of FM, then the standings look fine because this sort of thing happens all the time. Real-world 0 - FM game 2

Despite having a healthy number of English players, only a small number of those Leicester players will even be considered for England's Euro squad. It's usually the case that playing for the champions pretty much guarantees even an average player a place in the squad, so this doesn't make sense. But if you assume we are in a game of FM, then it makes perfect sense because this happens all the time. Real-world 0 - FM game 3

Leicester's tactics are relatively simple and consistent, yet opposing managers didn't successfully adapt their play to specifically counter their strengths. This doesn't make sense as such basic tactics with such a relatively poor group of players should be relatively easy to specifically prepare for. But if you assume that we are in an FM game, then it makes perfect sense, as the AI can never "crack" a tactic. Real World 0 - FM game 4

Kasper Schmeichel is first choice GK at the champions. This isn't realistic because Kasper has never really been any good. But if we are in an FM game this is very realistic, because winning a league with Kasper Schmeichel in goal is something we have all done over the years. Real world 0 - FM game 5

Leicester are quite frequently out-played in matches, yet win a large proportion of games 1-0. This being sustained, along with a lack of a reversion to the mean, is not realistic. However if we are in a game of FM, then it makes perfect sense because Ranieri (or the thing controlling him) simply quits the game after a realistic 4-0 defeat, and re-loads again and again until he wins 1-0. Real world 0 - FM game 6

Personally I don't think there is any other explanation. We aren't real.

Given we all now know that we are inside an FM game, it makes the next 5 years or so fairly easy to predict:

2016: Alli, Vardy and Kasri all miss out on goal of the season to an effort described as a "composed finish from point-blank range."

2016: England win Euro 16 with Gary Cahill scoring a hat-trick in the final.

2017: Vardy, Mahrez and Kante are signed by bigger clubs, but only get a handful of appearances over the next 3 years.

2017: Chelsea announce that their new stadium will be called the "Mourinho Arena"

2018: Leicester win the Champions league despite only naming a squad of 12 players for the final, due to international call-ups.

2018: Ranieri leaves to become Italy manager. Leicester fans quickly forget his name.

2018: England win World Cup 18 on penalties - beating Republic of Ireland in the final after a 0-0 draw.

2020: Ranieri gets bored of managing Italy, and takes over at Accrington-Stanley.

2020: England lose the final of Euro 20 3-0 to Kosovo.

2026: Accrington-Stanley get successive promotions and gain CL qualification in their first top-flight season

2026: Lionel Messi wins the Ballon D'or

2030: Accrington Stanley wins their first ever Champions League

2031: Ranieri resigns as manager of Accrington Stanley and goes on holiday.

2050: Ranieri is spotted emerging from a Leicester City cryotheraphy chamber, amidst rumours he is ready to return to management.

2051: Ranieri celebrates his 100th birthday by becoming manager of League 2 Manchester City.

2055: The 'Last Thing to Ever Happen' happens, as the Ranieri save game is accidentally deleted.

2055: This universe ceases to exist!

Have I missed anything?

Nah. The save game wasn't deleted. It got corrupted because someone switched off their laptop too early. Or the editing they did on the database caused a terminal crash.

you missed Cristiano Ronaldo having an absolutely indecent record in all of football, but continually missing out on the Ballon D'Or. Started feeling quite sorry for him in my save, he was constantly brilliant, broke records all over the place, even at International level for a change, and then didn't get called up for the squad for his final World Cup. In Portugal. Poor Ronno.

Load more leagues and even better, manually set them to run in Full Detail. England will win nothing then, as is usual. That will mean that more than half those predictions will fail though, so be warned.

I nearly wrote a post along the lines of Leicester being the most FM thing ever to happen to the Premiership but yours is much better.

Other evidence of your theory I've noticed include:

Jamie Vardy is completely unstoppable because defenders have no way of coping with quick players, even when defending on the edge of their own box. However, other managers do not take this into account when assessing his ability and have also failed to notice his determination, aggression and consistency and useful PPMs.

The only players Ranieri needs to sign to change from being relegation fodder to title contenders are an unremarkable veteran left back on a free transfer and an low reputation player from Ligue 1. This obviously isn't very realistic, and nor is the squad only needing 18 players, both clear signs we are operating in FM. Obviously "Ranieri" is reloading when players pick up training injuries.

Newcastle have spent significant sums of money on transfers even though Mike Ashley is still at the club. Obviously this is not the real Mike Ashley. They have also managed to secure the services of Rafa Benitez, fresh from the Real Madrid job, to help them fight relegation. Assuming we are in FM, this is unlikely to prevent Rafa from becoming the next England manager if England fail to reach the final of Euro 2016 (otherwise it will be Roberto Martinez)

Manchester United sell the very expensive player signed last season off at half price, replace him with another very expensive player and then don't play him either. This sort of irresponsible transfer policy from established top clubs obviously happens much more in FM. Also, their "manager" plays a slow player with excellent mental stats as a winger with responsibility for tracking back and a hardworking winger that's a bit raw in an AMC role. This is a clear sign that the tactical decisions are being made by the FM AI.

On the other hand, we've had two transfer windows and nobody has signed Zivkovic or Gabriel Barbosa yet. Also, Man Utd's player of the year is a goalkeeper, which is impossible in FM.

I think the next test of the theory will come when we see if Spurs finish above Arsenal. This is not unusual in FM, but clearly does not happen in real life. If England fail to win the European Championships, the next thing to look out for is the announcement that the Qatar World Cup has been moved to China.

This is now my favourite thread here instead of the Pardew one.

YKW and enigmatic, take a bow

Ranieri is such a save-scummer.

Had Man City had gone on to with the Champions Leagues this season I would have been looking for the leave game & exit option. I just pray that England exit Euro 2016 no later than the 2nd round otherwise it is proof that I've played so much FM it has becomes my reality.

I thought that this might be the most brilliant thing I've ever read on the forum, then noticed the poll (and answers) and that kicked it right over the top. (Five years ago, I probably wouldn't have got the joke...)

The poll options are a nice bit of icing,

For a while I've been thinking that Ranieri's like an FM player using an ME exploit tactic. This is much deeper and more brilliant. My hat's off to you!

Some people have to be a bit more realistic pls. I recently listened to BBC interview with betting agencies using sophisticated software that predicts where abouts teams will end up on the ladder with all statistics from players. The software programmes predicted Leicester City to end up in the very bottom of the table. The agents said it's a very rare thing to see because year in year out they are right with their predictions.

Every players stats is taken into effect, the leagues are played over many years over and over. So you really can't blame SI for this for gods sake. You know your wife is going to give birth soon but not even the doctor can predict which date or time the child will enter earth with all software and tools at his or her disposal.

Some people have to be a bit more realistic pls. I recently listened to BBC interview with betting agencies using sophisticated software that predicts where abouts teams will end up on the ladder with all statistics from players. The software programmes predicted Leicester City to end up in the very bottom of the table. The agents said it's a very rare thing to see because year in year out they are right with their predictions.

Every players stats is taken into effect, the leagues are played over many years over and over. So you really can't blame SI for this for gods sake. You know your wife is going to give birth soon but not even the doctor can predict which date or time the child will enter earth with all software and tools at his or her disposal.

Some people have to be a bit more realistic pls. I recently listened to BBC interview with betting agencies using sophisticated software that predicts where abouts teams will end up on the ladder with all statistics from players. The software programmes predicted Leicester City to end up in the very bottom of the table. The agents said it's a very rare thing to see because year in year out they are right with their predictions.

Every players stats is taken into effect, the leagues are played over many years over and over. So you really can't blame SI for this for gods sake. You know your wife is going to give birth soon but not even the doctor can predict which date or time the child will enter earth with all software and tools at his or her disposal.

It is quite bit to understand. Ranieri if he lost a match he would quite the game, reload the save and play the match again until he got a win or Draw. If that happen he move to next match save and repeat the same steps.

I can feel the fun being sucked out of this thread.

I think the next test of the theory will come when we see if Spurs finish above Arsenal. This is not unusual in FM, but clearly does not happen in real life. If England fail to win the European Championships, the next thing to look out for is the announcement that the Qatar World Cup has been moved to China.

A reliable source informs me it will be Canada...

Load more leagues and even better, manually set them to run in Full Detail. England will win nothing then, as is usual. That will mean that more than half those predictions will fail though, so be warned.

Um..

I think his predictions have a pretty decent chance either way

Yep, the fun has all gone.

Edit: I'm definitely stuck in an FM world. Just received an email saying that a job I applied for yesterday has been filled even though the position was posted the day before yesterday.

Yep, the fun has all gone.

Edit: I'm definitely stuck in an FM world. Just received an email saying that a job I applied for yesterday has been filled even though the position was posted the day before yesterday.

At least they didn't laugh off your interest...

Yep, the fun has all gone.

Edit: I'm definitely stuck in an FM world. Just received an email saying that a job I applied for yesterday has been filled even though the position was posted the day before yesterday.

Not wanting to laugh at your misfortune but that is the funniest thing I've read on here. Cap doffed, etc.

Yep, the fun has all gone.

Edit: I'm definitely stuck in an FM world. Just received an email saying that a job I applied for yesterday has been filled even though the position was posted the day before yesterday.

Blonde bombshell walked in, so immediately hired.

But wait, the plot thickens!

Further evidence has come to light in the sacking of Quique Sanchez Flores as Watford manager despite achieving his initial goal of avoiding relegation! Why you ask? It's quite simple really.

With Watford 7th at Christmas, he increased expectations to a top half finish to buy more players.

OH NO!

Edit: I'm definitely stuck in an FM world. Just received an email saying that a job I applied for yesterday has been filled even though the position was posted the day before yesterday.

Perhaps it was the big red 'Inj' icon next to your name that put them off?

OK, Spurs finished below Arsenal in amusing circumstances. Normal service resumed guys. Move on, nothing to see here