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Should be able to turn off scouting updates in inbox.


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To: Head scout for Eastern Europe

Subject: Re: Another average 32 year old Ukrainian striker prospect

My dear scout. It is always good to hear from you. It's reassuring to know that you are doing your job and not spending, well, at least not all your time in Kiev hitting the borscht bars. And I do of course appreciate that you have taken the time to recommend me another fine specimen of raw Eastern European manliness that will be able to challenge the players I already have on... well, if not on the pitch, then at least in terms of physical similarity to a boiled ham. However, I am the manager of a large European club. I have seven scouts. I get a lot of emails (all of you seem to share this same boundless desire for my love and attention). My inbox is getting stuffed. I just clicked past my actually useful scouting report for the next opposition, and I can't find my confirmation emails for certain gentlemen's websites... actually, never mind that.

In any case, as I've told both you and the press repeatedly (I wish those journalists could stop pestering me about that one-legged Finnish right back, as well), we won't be signing any more players in this transfer window. So tell you what, why don't you just gather up all your reports, and next transfer window, I'll come over and look at the whole bunch at once, and put the ones I like in my nice shortlist here, like I always do.

Seriously. Stop spamming my inbox.

Just something to consider...

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Just because you are not signing anymore players in this current window doesn't mean you won't sign anyone in the next ones. Plus managers irl look at players long before they sign them.

I hope the 32 yr old ukranian knocks you out of europe with a blast from 40 yrds out ;)

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  • 3 years later...

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