Player names that make you go WTF

**Bjeurn** · 21-02-2008 07:49

First of all, this is my first topic here /wave. Been lurking these forums a bit and decided it was time to make a topic.

I think everybody who has some CM/FM experience knows the feeling. You're either scouting or playing a team, and you stumble on a player that just makes you go 'what the hell'. This could be cause it's a funny combination of names, an incomprehensible last name, or maybe even no last name at all. This is the topic to show these players

I'll start out on a last name that really surprised me:

Reza Who?

Curious to see what you've found!

Regards

**SWaRFeGa** · 21-02-2008 07:51

Bjeurn

**ShaunO1** · 21-02-2008 07:51

I think it is pronounced Reza Retrainasawinger

**Bjeurn** · 21-02-2008 07:58

Originally posted by SWaRFeGa:
Bjeurn

I'm not too surprised ya said that

. Would be the Dutch pronounciation of my first name (BjÃ¶rn). Registered like that when I just wanted to lurk :P.

Any way, I wonder how they fitted that on his shirt

**jordanpower2007** · 21-02-2008 07:59

zlatan ljubranjic

**Nomis07** · 21-02-2008 08:04

Thadogs Bollochs

**Bjeurn** · 21-02-2008 08:08

I'd love to see a screen of that last one

.

Anyway, do you guys think this coach is ever gonna be succeful in England?

**niktheblade1** · 21-02-2008 08:11

Brian Pinas is and will always be my favorite!

**Nomis07** · 21-02-2008 08:13

Originally posted by Bjeurn:
I'd love to see a screen of that last one

.

Anyway, do you guys think this coach is ever gonna be succeful in England?

Haha

Not regens but I remember the old games, which had gems like; Raphael Scheidt at Celtic.

What about the cricketer for England whose name is pronounced Mask-er-anus.

**tottenham2k7** · 21-02-2008 08:30

Childish but..
Andre Muff

Mohammed Mohammed

**MarkTCfc** · 21-02-2008 08:34

IsaÃ¡c Cox

**disasterd** · 21-02-2008 08:35

zlatan ibrahimovic

**amplifierworship** · 21-02-2008 08:37

That lad Supaporn who was in 07 was a good one.

**dewey** · 21-02-2008 08:40

Ralf Minge

**tottenham2k7** · 21-02-2008 08:42

When i saw tottenham were going for a new goalkeeper i got excited...until i saw his name

Maarten Stekelenburg

haha imagine that on the back of your shirt

**disasterd** · 21-02-2008 08:45

david battymen

**disasterd** · 21-02-2008 08:45

paul gascoin

**saulty2805** · 21-02-2008 08:48

for some reason i cant get a screenie, but when your next on FM08 look at jason shade of sheff utd. His full name 'according to si' is very dodgy.

will try and get a screenie for you

**disasterd** · 21-02-2008 08:55

yea ive just seen it
its truely funny

Jason dark sun shades

**Tim Madisun** · 21-02-2008 09:16

Waldo Ponce.

Stick him on your shortlist for amusing news stories such as "Manager chases Ponce"

Good times

**saulty2805** · 21-02-2008 09:18

his official Full name is , say S Utd. Hence leaving him NFE ... that is true, i have not edited it at all... you check yourself

**disasterd** · 21-02-2008 09:19

harry prince
was one that made me laugh

sort by last name

prince , harry

**amplifierworship** · 21-02-2008 09:55

Originally posted by saulty2805:
his official Full name is , say S Utd. Hence leaving him NFE ... that is true, i have not edited it at all... you check yourself

Yeah, what's going on with that?

**arsenal_2111** · 21-02-2008 10:46

Is saying Rod Fanni just immature?

If so, never mind!

There was a regen on m game (not at my club) called Scott Scott. His cruel parents!

**Ackbaria** · 21-02-2008 10:59

When I managed Botafogo in FM 06 I had a brazilian regen named JÃ¼rgen Hitler.

**PMLF** · 21-02-2008 11:04

Probably one of those infamous "name in the game" players. I am glad SI got rid of them!

**ZlatanFollower** · 21-02-2008 11:56

Originally posted by Tim Madisun:
Waldo Ponce.

Stick him on your shortlist for amusing news stories such as "Manager chases Ponce"

Good times

lol, done that before :P

also did it with a regen caled Flavio Weiner

"X" chases Weiner

how mature :P

**Sweet-Zombie-Jesus** · 21-02-2008 11:59

I've seen a regen called John Godsman

**Skunner** · 21-02-2008 12:22

If I ever feel down, I just have a look at the China squad or Iraq squad.

Makes me laugh every time.

**Quacky** · 21-02-2008 12:38

It took me a few moments to work out how to cheer for this guy Dalibor Crkvenjakov but by far the best name is Cook Islander, Lemon Moo.

**backpackant** · 21-02-2008 12:38

I remember a Swiss stadium with the word Wanktof in the name. Current game, 2007. 802 patch...

**Quacky** · 21-02-2008 12:45

Stade de Suisse Wankdorf, home of BSC Young Boys. Its a well known thing backpackant, they rebuilt the stadium from the old Wankdorf but its still in the name.

**happy slappy** · 21-02-2008 12:55

Elliot Elliot.

**ProudoftheSun** · 21-02-2008 15:20

All the players from Madagascar.

I don't understand how they all have such incredible last names.

**nbirkett1** · 21-02-2008 15:48

I've always liked the fact that there were two Przemyslaw Kazimierczak's in the game!

**route1** · 21-02-2008 15:50

**Starr_Man5** · 21-02-2008 15:56

On my last save on '07 I signed a striker who scored on his debut for me (At Atletico Madrid).

The commentary was great:

"And the fans chant Ignacio Diaz De Cerio's name!!"..

Exactly how? And to the tune of what?

I subsequently changed his name to simply "Diaz".

**solid3** · 21-02-2008 19:44

Creedence Clearwater Couto

**Mark Snellink** · 21-02-2008 21:35

Originally posted by Starr_Man5:
On my last save on '07 I signed a striker who scored on his debut for me (At Atletico Madrid).

The commentary was great:

"And the fans chant Ignacio Diaz De Cerio's name!!"..

Exactly how? And to the tune of what?

I subsequently changed his name to simply "Diaz".

Ignacio Diaz de Cerio, fa la la la la, Ignacio Diaz de Cerio, faaa la la la la la

**Y@$H!** · 21-02-2008 21:53

Some regen made me almost p!ss myself...CAMPBELL DICK...The headline...Wenger chases Dick...ROFLMFAO!!!!!!

**Nomis07** · 22-02-2008 01:07

Originally posted by route1:

There are a few Benders in Germany.....Lars plays for 1860 Munich.

**nk86** · 22-02-2008 03:46

Didi Ben-Lulu is currently a right back for sevilla on mine

also, on one of the old versions, i had a grey player called Pete Hercules

**vanpersie11** · 22-02-2008 03:50

In one game I had a player called Willie Hunter

**Bloodstreaks** · 22-02-2008 03:56

I had a regen on 07 called 'Potato'.. He didnt turn out very good, and then there is a player in the Tottenham youth called Troy Archibald-Henville.. Imagine putting that name on a shirt!

**markrae1** · 22-02-2008 04:00

My favourite CM2 regen was Paddy Le Saux!

**Bassman666** · 22-02-2008 04:57

german

stefan kuntz

beautiful, just beautiful

2 world wars eh? ha ha

**Nobby_McDonald** · 22-02-2008 11:49

Two regens stick out for me from a 01/02 clan game I played...

Chocolate (and was Nigerian!)
James Brilliant (who was rubbish)

**Nobby_McDonald** · 22-02-2008 11:51

Originally posted by Bassman666:
german

stefan kuntz

beautiful, just beautiful

2 world wars eh? ha ha

That reminds me of a John Motson commentary at a finals (can't remember which one).

"And Germany are about to make a substition... Kuntz..."

**muncherdave** · 27-02-2008 15:55

this year so far ive found Yu Sup, Waldo Ponce and the winner young Benfica striker Wang Gang

**eaglealan64** · 27-02-2008 16:28

I have a youngster come through the academy - Scott Scott !!

**Oktober** · 27-02-2008 17:41

There is apparently a South African player in the database with the surname Hitler so in theory, a South African regen could pick it up at some point.

I'm still fond of Pheng Pheng Pheng Pheng of Vietnam. And I suppose my star Japanese players first name of Yusuke (You suck) is pretty cool. One of my youth strikers though has an awesome name... Fabrizio Zonzini. Dubbed the next Andy Selva, no less.

**skintsaint** · 27-02-2008 19:36

Originally posted by Nobby_McDonald:

That reminds me of a John Motson commentary at a finals (can't remember which one).

"And Germany are about to make a substition... Kuntz..."

Euro 96, Motson was talking about Germany winning the last few games...then came out with Kuntz hehe

I signed a physio with the last name of Gay...

Message came up "Gay signs for Southampton"

I assumed it was John O'Shea but alais is wasnt.

**Fire Bracelet** · 27-02-2008 21:32

Armand One plays for TPS (Finland) in my game. He's from France so I'm not sure if that's a common surname or what.

**NickT** · 27-02-2008 21:43

I don't know if they're in the game, but three real players:

Have-A-Look Dube
Danger Fourpence
Bongo Christ

**Shiny223** · 27-02-2008 21:43

Originally posted by Y@$H!:
Some regen made me almost p!ss myself...CAMPBELL DICK...The headline...Wenger chases Dick...ROFLMFAO!!!!!!

God thats feckin brilliant, mate.

**phnompenhandy** · 27-02-2008 22:24

Originally posted by Bassman666:
german

stefan kuntz

beautiful, just beautiful

2 world wars eh? ha ha

You must remember the original video for 'Three Lions' - banned by the Beeb - which had the German wall with all the players sporting 'kuntz' on the backs of their shirts

Danger Fourpence
Bongo Christ

NickT - Seriously? Who do they play for? There is a real-life Bungo Singh in India - should be in the game.

**Y@$H!** · 27-02-2008 22:31

Almost fell off my couch when my new lot of academy players came in, a kinky cross-dressing Zimbabwean...LOVELACE SIBANDA!!!!!!!

Pity he was sh!te and I had to release him...maybe he'll also join LA Galaxy and sent off against Argentina in a World Cup!!!

**Y@$H!** · 28-02-2008 01:37

Originally posted by Shiny223:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Y@$H!:
Some regen made me almost p!ss myself...CAMPBELL DICK...The headline...Wenger chases Dick...ROFLMFAO!!!!!!

God thats feckin brilliant, mate.

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ha ha, yep...some classics too from commentary when playing him:

* "Dick hit the post" * yow that must'v hurt

* "The crowd chant Dick's name" * the perv's!!
and the classic...
"Dick should've scored"

LOL hahahahaha

**skintsaint** · 28-02-2008 04:35

Originally posted by Y@$H!:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Shiny223:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Y@$H!:
Some regen made me almost p!ss myself...CAMPBELL DICK...The headline...Wenger chases Dick...ROFLMFAO!!!!!!

God thats feckin brilliant, mate.

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ha ha, yep...some classics too from commentary when playing him:

* "Dick hit the post" * yow that must'v hurt

* "The crowd chant Dick's name" * the perv's!!
and the classic...
"Dick should've scored"

LOL hahahahaha </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Dick heads wide?

**Tom Leeburn** · 28-02-2008 04:53

there is a player called hobbit, i believe he is mexican

**andysharkey21** · 28-02-2008 05:12

[QUOTE]Originally posted by skintsaint:

Message came up "Gay signs for Southampton"[QUOTE]

im sure that could be said about most of your players!

**Penfolder** · 28-02-2008 05:47

On earlier verson of CM there was a Thai player called Bamrong Boonprom
Always thought it was afunny name!

Oh and he's real!
Boonprom

**mitch537** · 28-02-2008 06:00

okay ive seen a few on my current game...

my german star striker johan geyer
then my centre back is kunze

there was a guy called curtis jackson (nickname him 50cent perhaps?)

and then realmadrid have a defender called kalashnikov (hes a real gun of a player!)

**Nomis07** · 28-02-2008 06:01

Originally posted by skintsaint:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Y@$H!:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Shiny223:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Y@$H!:
Some regen made me almost p!ss myself...CAMPBELL DICK...The headline...Wenger chases Dick...ROFLMFAO!!!!!!

God thats feckin brilliant, mate.

</div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ha ha, yep...some classics too from commentary when playing him:

* "Dick hit the post" * yow that must'v hurt

* "The crowd chant Dick's name" * the perv's!!
and the classic...
"Dick should've scored"

LOL hahahahaha </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Dick heads wide? </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Dick is really up for this match.

**Bartman2008** · 28-02-2008 06:46

Can't remember which team he plays for, but there is a Danny Shittsu

**NickT** · 28-02-2008 06:56

Originally posted by phnompenhandy:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content"> Danger Fourpence
Bongo Christ

NickT - Seriously? Who do they play for? There is a real-life Bungo Singh in India - should be in the game. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
Apparently Danger Fourpence plays for Caps Utd, and I don't know who he plays for but Bongo is from Congo. As far as I can tell, neither is in the game.

Few more at http://nameoftheyear.blogspot.com/2007/04/zimbabwe-is-f...s-danger-brains.html

**moorag** · 28-02-2008 07:17

my favourite is from real life - he plays for morocco i think - Rectum Salami - makes me chuckle every time

**jkae** · 28-02-2008 07:38

ivanschitz!!!!!

**jammyjizz** · 28-02-2008 07:40

i went to the world cup in germany and my dad wouldnt let me get a germany shirt with Kuntz on the back. dunno why, hes a real player.

**blackadder1984** · 28-02-2008 08:16

i've just sold a nigerian kid called Sunday Monday and also my scouts noticed a young french kid called...Eric Cantona...hmmmm. although he's not actually great and he's a LB

**james_33** · 28-02-2008 23:45

Originally posted by arsenal_2111:
Is saying Rod Fanni just immature?

If so, never mind!

There was a regen on m game (not at my club) called Scott Scott. His cruel parents!

I'm from South Africa and there was a TV presenter by the name of Scott Scott

**Y@$H!** · 28-02-2008 23:51

Haha yep me too James_33, good old curly haired MNet presenter....oh and dont forget Gerald de Kock

**eXistenZ** · 29-02-2008 01:16

I found two Diego Maradona's

**Ben Mann** · 29-02-2008 01:25

In FM2007 there was a nigerian player called Ice Cream!

**Wijnand fens** · 07-03-2008 02:08

season 31

name:
Friday Sunday

He was also in fm 07 and 06

**Y@$H!** · 07-03-2008 02:25

I needed some new strikers after reverting to a 4-3-3 ...what a three-"pronged" attack with these guys:

Steve Short
Matthew Dick
Michael Mann

Now picture them in your tactics screen...

**Dreaded Walrus** · 07-03-2008 05:35

Originally posted by Quacky:
Stade de Suisse Wankdorf, home of BSC Young Boys. Its a well known thing backpackant, they rebuilt the stadium from the old Wankdorf but its still in the name.

Oh man... anyone remember the Soccernet headline regarding that? Truly legendary.

Young Boys' Wankdorf erection woe.

And then, two years later, Young Boys Wankdorf erection relief.

Whoever came up with those headlines deserves a pay rise.

**Bullion1** · 07-03-2008 05:51

Originally posted by Dreaded Walrus:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Quacky:
Stade de Suisse Wankdorf, home of BSC Young Boys. Its a well known thing backpackant, they rebuilt the stadium from the old Wankdorf but its still in the name.

Oh man... anyone remember the Soccernet headline regarding that? Truly legendary.

Young Boys' Wankdorf erection woe.

And then, two years later, Young Boys Wankdorf erection relief.

Whoever came up with those headlines deserves a pay rise. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

that is legendary.

**creature_from_ottawa** · 07-03-2008 06:35

nick coward

not that funny,but still coward.

**Radon** · 07-03-2008 06:47

Masahiro Nakashita... Duisburg physio, quite a good one I think

**gubbs** · 07-03-2008 07:16

Who could forget the seemingly indefatiguable Kuntz dribbling up and down the wing ...

Danny Shittunot!

**Jakey_q** · 07-03-2008 14:08

]

[/URL]

**philly_flyer10** · 07-03-2008 15:47

In EHM, theres a player called Fukufuji. Sounds like hes really annoyed with a camera firm.

**turn it upto 11** · 07-03-2008 16:07

Originally posted by Jakey_q:

]

[/URL]

im sure the queen would love dick, only at a reasonable price though.

**WolvesNicky** · 08-03-2008 17:25

James James

**anagain** · 08-03-2008 17:38

Had a youth regen this season named Prince Cornwall (honest).

I'm sure Madge would be proud of her grandkiddies for getting in the Bournemouth setup.

He's actually not a bad left winger and I envisage good things of him.

**Chrisy177** · 09-03-2008 07:24

had a regen called "Nikola Hadziahmetovic"
Also "Tommy de ****"
And in the Preston Under 18s: "DJ Dickford" (also a regen)

**Alex14/01/87** · 09-03-2008 07:46

Tal Shitrit an isreli referee

**Dreaded Walrus** · 09-03-2008 14:00

In my save there's a regen at Tamworth with the rather excellent name Phil Brazil.

**Mike7077** · 09-03-2008 15:25

I just had a player play against me in the Russian league called Oh Bum-Suk.

And he's not a regen! Made me chuckle, it did.

Search

Thread: Player names that make you go WTF

Thread Tools

Display

Bookmarks

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions