Anything you can do, we can do better – the game thread.

[Denther]

Background:

The Times

In an unprecedented move, the FA has today announced that it intends to appoint 10 football fans to take control of teams in the Blue Square South and North. An FA spokesperson said the reason for the decision was to prove to fans once and for all that they could not do a better job than professional managers.

“We always hear of fans complaining that their managers are rubbish and that they could do a better job. They complain about the formation, the starting line up, the way managers handle the press, everything. Well it’s time for them to put their money where their mouth is. We will be accepting applications from fans all over the world. The best 10 applicants will get to manage a Blue Square South or North team of their choice.”

When asked what would happen to the displaced managers the spokesperson merely commented that “they will be given an adequate compensation package”.

There are also rumours that the FA will allow the chosen candidates to bring in a member of staff of their choice. The staff member could be playing or non-playing. The FA spokesperson has not denied or confirmed these rumours but did say “the successful candidates will be given the opportunity to bring in adequate support”.

The Sign Up:

The idea was that 10 fans (now 12) be given the opportunity to manage a Blue Square South or North team. Their CA has been set at 60 to represent the lack of experience (their only experience being FM!). However, this is the fans opportunity to prove that, in fact, they do know more than the professionals. Therefore their PA has been set at -9 (not 200 as I believe even the most dedicated fan would never match Fergie etc, and anyway I would like to see some smaller teams involved in the sign up, not just Man Oooo or Chelski.)

The 12 managers have also be given the opportunity to bring in 1 member of staff. Be that bringing in their wise old dad as their ass man or your younger brother as their star right back, the choice was entirely theirs. These members of staff also have a CA of 60 PA of -9.

I will try and keep the updates quite interesting by including newspaper reports as above. The Updates will be 1st October, 1st February and 31st May every season. My aim is to do one update a week.

I will also be thinking of ways to throw surprises into the sign up by introducing sub plots, such as displaced managers plotting their revenge, which may result in signer uppers losing their jobs .

This is my first sign up so please feel free to make suggestions or tell me where I am going wrong.

Details of the game, including leagues being run, can be found here.

The sign up thread can be found here.

[Denther]

The Times

The FA has released to the Times details of the successful applicants who are now managers in the BSS or BSN, along with details of their chosen member of staff.

Coop624 - I apologise for the mistake in getting your managers name the wrong way round

Patton Cooper is the new manager of Workington. In his application he admitted that he was "A self-confessed football tragic". He also revealed that "Among the pros of Patton´s previous football fan experience, was his winning of the pub football tipping competition in ´98, and the bet he won of $100 that Hull would get promoted to the premiership in 2009. He was also voted ´Most Likely to Start a Fight Over Football´ by his drinking peers."

The FA accepted Cooper's application because "The FA believes that anyone who predicted Hull would get into the Premiership must have some kind of footballing 6th sense. Also as he was also voted ´Most Likely to Start a Fight Over Football´ by his drinking peers we believe Mr Patton and Mr Blanco could have a very... interesting relationship."

More details on Patton can be found here.

Coop Cooper is Patton's chosen member of staff. An ex Sutherland Sharks player, Patton has seen his fellow Australian's potential and has asked him to come play for Workington.

More details on Coop Cooper can be found here.

Hamilton162

Tom Hamilton is the new manager of Southport. In his application he stated that "I should be chosen as i have had an addiction to FM for many years, despite smashing several keyboards, monitors and mice to bits".

The FA gave theses reasons for accepting his bid, "Although concerned about Mr Hamilton's aggression towards his son, they were more worried about the aggression towards them if he wasn't chosen. Also the FA have been contacted by Wycombe who pleaded with them to appoint Mr Hamilton as a manager to "stop the maniac sitting on our roof!".

However the FA have specified that Mr Hamilton not be given a computer in his new job as they believe Bath cannot afford to fork out for a new keyboard/mouse every time he smashes them up."

More details on Tom Hamilton can be found here.

Tom Hamilton Jr is Hamilton's chosen member of staff. The son of AFC Wimbledon Manager Tom Hamilton, Tom Hamilton Jr is an up and coming striker with a great future ahead of him (according to Tom Hamilton).

More details on Tom Hamilton Jr can be found here.

Blowcrapup

Robert Blowcrapup is the new manager of Blyth. In his application he had this to say, "He wants to try and stay in the North East and get his hands on his beloved Magpies but he is content to work his way up the ladder. He likes to watch and create fast, counter attacking football and is always one of the first people to defend any of his players."

The FA accepted Blowcrapup's application as "The FA feel that they had to accommodate for an applicant who follows Newcastle Utd. They believe that as all Newcastle fans are deluded about the quality of their team, making one of them a manager would be perfect, they can be disillusioned about another team for a change."

More details on Robert Blowcrapup can be found here.

Luke Blowcrapup is Robert's son, as well as being a talented footballer he is also an avid chess player and is cyrrently trying to learn to speak Manderin.

More details on Luke Blowcrapup can be found here.

Fergysafc

Stew Ferguson is the new manager of Tamworth. In his application he gave the following details, "The manager Stew ferguson was born in Hartlepool and grew up in a town called Horden, it is his lifelong dream to become a football manager. He has a wide range of skills and loves Sunderland.

The FA commented that they "were impressed by Mr Ferguson's attitude and determination. Although, the FA would like to point out that following members of the FA board home and singing to them outside their homes at 2am in the morning in an attempt to be chosen, is not normal."

More details on Stew Ferguson can be found here.

Liam Ferguson is Stew's son and is a great player for the future and has a wide range of skills.

More details on Liam Ferguson can be found here.

More to follow...

[BenArsenal]

C'mon Vauxhall!

[Denther]

The Times

BenArsenal

Ben Cee is the new manager of Vauxhall Motors. Ben stated in his application that "I should be considered for the post of manager at Vauxhall Motors because of my exemplary record in FM games. While major trophies are few and far between (only two Champions Leagues and one La Liga title), I've been known to help minor clubs overachieve beyond their expectations."

The FA said this about Ben's application, "The FA couldn't give two hoots about Mr Cee however they were very impressed with Miss Brown's two hoots! The FA have since commented that there should be more woman in football, especially ones who have the stature, experience and legs of Miss Brown."

More details on Ben Cee can be found here.

Rachel Brown is Ben's assistant manager. Ben said "I've decided to rope in my fiancee Rachel, whom I met during my days as a Premier League footballer, as my assistant manager, for she is as passionate about football as I am."

More details on Rachel can be found here.

Blanco

Cristobal Blanco is the new manager of Welling. In his application he revealed a cloudy past, "The wealthy Blanco family left Peru under a bit of a cloud some seven or eight years ago. Papa Blanco was the owner of a gold and diamond mining company, but was forced to sell up and leave the country once it became clear that the incidents involving executives at rival companies disappearing down mineshafts were all connected to him."

The FA still accepted his application, "Although there are allegations against Mr Blanco relating to the unusual disappearances of rival executives, the FA feel that he would fit perfectly into today's cut throat approach in football. The FA believe the presence of Mr Blanco and his son will keep the other managers on their toes".

More details on Cristobal Blanco can be found here.

Juan Manuel Blanco is Cristobal's son. Both Blanco's are now naturalised British citizens and season ticket holders at Underhill, and now there is a Barnet fan club located in Cuzco, in Peru, where League 2 games are broadcast to the world.

More details on Juan Manuel Blanco can be found here.

Hamuel

Charlie Crabs is the new manager of AFC Wimbledon. In his application he said the following, "A cockney geezer through and through. Would like to obtain control of the wombles of which he has been a lifelong fan in return for waiving Jon Mains gambling debts and for the destruction of some interesting personal polaroids of Terry Brown and Uncle Bulgaria."

The FA "were impressed with Mr Crabs... enthusiasm about taking over AFC Wimbledon. They would especially like to see him wrestling a Womble, although the FA do not condone animal cruelty. The FA also miss the days of hard tackling and broken legs being a mere scratch. The days when yellow cards were only awarded if you didn't say you were frightfully sorry after headbutting someone, nobody has manners nowadays".

More details on Charlie Crabs can be found here.

Junior Khanye Jnr is "the son of FM2007 legend Junior Khanye. But alas he is his son in name only. Kicked out from his home when only 12 after questioning his father whether there was more to being a footballer than dribbling 20. The next years are murky; some say he went to Guyana to train to be a priest, some say he was drugged by his father and woke up there in exile as a disgrace to the family".

More details on Junior Khanye Jnr can be found here.

Coldkohmew

Charlie Zhang is the new manager of Stalybridge. Apparently "Charlie Zhang, a baba who returned from the United Kingdom, he is generally disapproving of the Peranakan culture, earning him scorn from the older generation of high Peranakan society. He has affairs with many women, and would like to take over a New Club with his wealth and status".

The FA were perplexed, "The FA has no idea what a baba or a Peranakan is, but Mr Zhang has a lot of money and likes women and so the FA could not help but admire him for being just like the FA's beloved Sven! Oh how we miss Sven, perhaps Mr Zhang can replace what was lost upon the departure of the great Mr Eriksson".

More details on Charlie Zhang can be found here.

Robert Zhang is Charlie's son. It is said that he is "a cunning one like his father. He would like to be a Club legend and be successful as his father".

More details on Robert Zhang can be found here.

More to follow...

[Denther]

The Times

Jamjerome

Josy Joseph is the new manager of Bromley. Joseph is "a man obsessed over football who managed to gain entry as a manager through backhand deals with FA officials to finally realise his dream of applying his own ideas on a scale more than just video games but to a real team!"

The FA gave this reason for accepting Mr Joseph "Simple really, he bribed the FA".

More details on Josy Joseph can be found here.

Jerome Joseph is Josy's son. "Once a hot shot youth talent, scouted heavily and of much interest to clubs all over the world until laziness hit at a surprisingly young age, but his dad (manager) inspiring him and assuring him of a place in his new side has reinvigorated him".

More details on Jerome Joseph can be found here.

Wegason

Edward Nelson is the new manager of Braintree. He baffled the FA with his bizarre application, "As a research scientist he has spent a great deal of time researching and experimenting with growing brains on trees and whether the cerebral cortex can in essence be recreated by growing it on trees in the Braintree area. Edward recorded one case of a tree that looked like a brain, leading him to submit a research paper that was widely derided by the scientific community, causing the Sun to brand Edward as “Brain-less”."

However, the FA still accepted his application, "The FA were utterly bemused by Mr Nelson's application. They had no idea that you could grow brains on trees. However they were very happy that this 'research' coincidently ties in with the team Mr Nelson has applied for".

More details on Edward Nelson can be found here.

Ryan Lamb is Edward's chosen member of staff and gave some 'interesting' information on him, "Ryan Lamb grew up on a farm near Braintree herding Sheep for a living. His experiences on his parents farm, together with running and walking over the vast farming estate, meant that he has great stamina, running ability, and fitness for a young lad. His experience with herding lambs to the slaughter has made him a committed vegetarian".

More information can be found on Ryan Lamb here.

Crouchie

Jake Nash is the new manager of AFC Telford. He had this to say on his application, "I am an avid football man. I spend much of my time discussing with colleagues at work just where modern day managers are going wrong these days. What I’ give for more charismatic managers like Cloughie in today’s game. I believe too much time is spent tweaking tactics and that good old-fashioned Man management is the way to success".

The FA were impressed by his past experience, "Mr Nash's experience in coaching his local youth side will stand him in good stead for the challenges ahead. Because of this previous experience Mr Nash is the only applicant the FA actually like as they feel he is more like them and not just a smart arse FM manager".

More details on Jake Nash can be found here.

Jamie Schober has been appointed by Nash as his assistant manager and had this to say, "Jamie is a very strong friend of mine. He and I have a very strong bond and work together perfectly. We know one another’s strengths and weaknesses and can strategically solve problems using each other’s assets (not breasts) to our advantage".

More details on Jamie Schober can be found here.

M.G.L

Sam Ralph is the new manager of Bognor Regis. Sam got personal in his application, "Sam Ralph is a middle-aged lowlife from South London, he's never been married and has only ever been in one relationship, unfortunately the lucky lady had been keeping some secrets from Sam and the lady wasn't really a lady at all".

The FA "were very impressed with Mr Ralph's scouting ability. The FA feel that if he uses his knowledge of local park players well Bognor may not actually finish bottom of the table, although the FA feel that 20th is a completely unrealistic target. Also the FA will not let Mr Ralph near the under 18 team as they may start throwing stones at him".

More details on Sam Ralph can be found here.

Miles Johnson is Sam's chosen player. "Sam Ralph saw Miles Johnson on a rare trip to the local common, Miles wasn't with a team, just with playing with his mates. To be honest, Miles was overweight and obviously very unfit. Sam was just turning his head away until Miles got the ball. He chested it down superbly and hit a fantastic volley that went into the net, from 30 yards out".

More details on Miles Johnson can be found here.

There you have it!

[Blanco]

Great stuff so far!

[Denther]

Ok so all the managers and players profiles are now up!!!

Feel free to flesh out your characters a bit more through interviews, newspaper articles etc, but don't worry if not. As long as you all post I'm happy

First update will be Sunday or Tuesday (I hope )

[crouchie]

Brilliant start, nice to have so much detail put in. KUTGW

[BenArsenal]

Vauxhall Motors held a press conference at Vauxhall's motor plant at Ellsmere Port today, as their Rivacre Road stadium was too small. Although, with the noise of the factory as Corsas and Astras rolled off the production line in the background, it wasn't very much better.

Vauxhall spokesman: So, welcome journalists, to Ellsmere Port, for our unveiling of our new managerial lineup.

And with that, he pulled off a cloth that was concealing both Ben and Rachel, like a magician. Voila! Cue applause.

Spokesman: Thank you. You may begin your questions now.

The Daily Mirror: So, Ben, what made you want to come to Ellsmere Port?
Ben: I felt that it would be a good challenge, to make this team successful.

The Daily Mail: You've decided to bring in your fiancee as your assistant manager. Will this affect your professional relationship at all?
Ben: I think we are both professional enough to separate work from personal issues.

F365: Women are few and far between in football. Do you think you have what it takes to be successful?
Rachel: I certainly do. I know a lot about football, and Ben will certainly help me out a great deal too. *flutters eyelids*

Soccernet: What are your short term, and long term goals, for the club?
Ben: I understand that we're not exactly the biggest, or richest club in this division. Even if we're backed by a car company, times now means that money is tight. So I guess that for the short term I will look to consolidate Vauxhall's position in this division, and maybe work on youth development. After that, we can plan for the future and work our way up.

442: Some say that having a pretty female on the sidelines could be a distraction. What do you make of that?
Rachel: Well, too bad for them then. They should keep their eyes on the ball.

The Sun: Will you be resorting to any 'tactics' to help your club gain an advantage, if you know what I mean?
Ben: What do you mean?

The Sun: I mean, you know, with Rachel...
Ben: Please get your mind out of the gutter.
Rachel: Yeah! We're not dirty people.

The Daily Telegraph: But surely, you have to acknowledge, having an attractive blonde woman on the touchline can be an advantage in this division?
Ben: Look, we're serious about our jobs. Rachel's not eye candy for you jerks to stare at. She's my fiancee and she's here to help me out with the running of this football club.

The Independent: One last question...
Ben: No more questions.

The Independent: But I haven't asked any questions yet!
Ben: Too bad for you.

The Sun: Can we have Rachel's number please?
Rachel: No!

Vauxhall spokesman: All right gentlemen. The press conference is over. Please make your way to this side where we have our latest lineup of cars for you to check out. Thank you.

[hamilton162]

The Sun: Can we have Rachel's number please?
Rachel: No!

That has me ROFL Ben Classic Sun

[Denther]

He He, great stuff Ben

[PluckaDuck]

Brilliant start mate. As a non-signed up observer, I will be actively reading this!!!

KUTGW Mate!

[Denther]

Brilliant start mate. As a non-signed up observer, I will be actively reading this!!!

KUTGW Mate!

Thank you very much

It's nice to know that others are following this as well

[coldkohmew]

Rumor that Stalybridge is getting a Japanese player!!!

Charile Zhang was seen collaborating with the Japanese National team today at a clubhouse,it may be possible that he wanted to bring some talent from Japan as He did helped the Japanese many times.As usual he is seen with a Japanese woman next to him......

[Coop624]

Don´t apologise about getting the name wrong Denther - I think everyone has at least once.

[Denther]

The Times

1st October 2008

Welcome to the first update of the season on the lucky 12 fans who have been given the privilege of going into professional football management. 7 of the managers are in the Blue Square North (Stalybridge, Workington, Tamworth, Blyth, Telford and Vauxhall) and 5 are in the Blue Square South (Welling, Bognor Regis, AFC Wimbledon, Bromley and Braintree).

The new managers have had mixed success, some mediocre, some terrible, some good and one manager has done exceptionally well considering the team he is at. All the managers and their staff have decided to stay at their original teams... for now.

Let's have a look at the tables then:-

Blue Square North

Blue Square South

The Blue Square North is very close at the moment. AFC Telford are top, but Southport, Tamworth and Workington are within three points and have a game in hand. Ben Cee will be very happy as Vauxhall are currently 12th after being predicted to finish last! Charlie Zhang has a lot of work to do at Stalybridge, they are 16th but are predicted to finish 5th! Blyth are last but if they can convert some draws into wins they will shoot up the table.

The Blue Square South is a lot more spread out. Blanco has done a fantastic job with Welling. They are predicted to finish 12th, but are runaway leaders! AFC Wimbledon are 3rd, but being predicted to finish 2nd Charlie Crabs will want to push on. Bromley are doing well, they are 7th but their game in hand could see them move to 2nd! Edward Nelson will be disappointed that his team Braintree are 13th. Finally, Bognor Regis look in trouble already, 21st and 3 points from safety after only 9 games!

Awards -

None of our managers' players have won player of the month yet. However some of the managers themselves have been impressing...

BSN - August Manager of the month
BSN - September Manager of the month

BSS - August Manager of the month
BSS - September Manager of the month

Blanco

Cristobal Blanco - Welling

Blanco must have very very high expectations, despite being top he is disappointed with how things are going.

In the news Blanco has been showing how much confidence he has in his team, he believes the can win the Conference Leauge Cup.

Juan Blanco has made a solid start but will be hoping for more games. However he did score in extra time to put Josy Joseph's Bromley out of the CLC.

Here are Welling's results and transfers. As we can see, Blanco's achievement is even more impressive by the fact he has bought nobody in!!

M.G.L

Sam Ralph - Bognor Regis

Understandably, Sam Ralph is distraught at the thought of destroying his beloved Bognor.

In the news Sam Ralph recognises Blanco's superior team and manager skills.

Ralph will be hoping that Miles Johnson will stay clear of injury. He was out for 5 weeks after twisting his ankle on the opening day of the season.

Here are Bognor's results and transfers.

Hamuel

Charlie Crabs - AFC Wimbledon

Charlie Crabs is disappointed with AFC Wimbledon's 3rd place.

In the news he was unwilling to say who he thought would win the BSS, a sign that he doesn't think he's up to the job?

Junior Khanye Jr has made a very impressive start to the season.

Here are AFC Wimbledon's results and transfers. With only one signing it looks as though Crabs is confident his team are good enough already.

Jamjerome

Josy Joseph - Bromley

Josy Joseph has already decided he is too good for Bromley and is considering his options.

Josy has been very controversial in his press conferences, he has stormed out of 5 of 8 press conferences!!! He is also very critical towards his own players, especially his son!!!

Jerome Joseph, despite his dad, has made a decent start and has scored 4 goals, including an 80th minute winner against Bognor.

Here are Bromley's results and transfers.

Wegason

Edward Nelson - Braintree

Edward Nelson is disappointed with his team's poor start.

In the news Edward has been confusing the press by stating that playing well is bad for his team.

Ryan Lamb has played a lot of games but not played that well.

Here are Braintree's results and transfers. Edward Nelson getting rid of half his squad may explain the poor league position!!!

Coldkohmew

Charlie Zhang - Stalybridge

Charlie Zhang is another manager that isn't sure the Blue Square is for him as he's considering his options.

In the news Zhang wasn't at all bitter following the loss to Southport.

Robert Zhang hasn't played as much as he would have liked due to being out with a broken cheekbone for 4 weeks.

Here are Stalybridge's results and transfers.

Coop624

Patton Cooper - Workington

Patton Cooper, as most of the managers, is disappointed with how things are going.

In the news Cooper clearly wasn't happy with the press mentioning his loss to Vauxhall. He has now stormed out of two press conferences.

Coop Cooper has had a steady start, but was hampered by being out for 12 days due to a facial injury... twice!!!

Here are Workington's results and transfers.

Fergysafc

Stew Ferguson - Tamworth

Stew Ferguson is disappointed with how things are going.

In the news Ferguson obviously doesn't think much of the Conference League Cup.

Liam Ferguson has only played a few games, but did score on the opening day of the season in the win over Southport. His lack of games is due to a twisted knee which kept him on the sidelines for three weeks.

Here are Tamworth's results and transfers. Tony Sheridan being a notable signing!

Blowcrapup

Robert Blowcrapup - Blyth

Blowcrapup is bottom of the table and so unsurprisingly is disappointed how things are going.

In the news Blowcrapup was never confident of his Blyth team.

Luke Blowcrapup has made an excellent start scoring 4 goals in 10 games.

Here are Blyth's results and transfers. Perhaps the lack of transfers explains Blyth's position

Crouchie

Jake Nash - AFC Telford

Jake Nash has obviously had his ego inflated by taking Telford to the top of the league as he is considering his options.

In the news Nash has shown he's not a modest man by saying Telford will win the league.

Here are Telford's results and transfers.

BenArsenal

Ben Cee - Vauxhall

Ben Cee is a hard man to please, despite doing well to get Vauxhall to 12th he is disappointed with how things are going.

In the news Cee has proven he's not afraid to use a good old cliché.

Here are Vauxhall's results and transfers.

Hamilton162

Tom Hamilton - Southport

Tom Hamilton is as hard to please as the other managers as he is disappointed with how things are going.

In the news Hamilton has been bringing his players back down to earth, no matter how good the goal.

Tom Hamilton Jr has made a very solid start, scoring 6 goals in 9 games, including one in a 2-0 win over Ben Cee's Vauxhall.

Here are Southport's results and transfers.

If there is anything else people would like in future updates please let me know. I will probably show different things in each update to keep it a bit varied.

At the end of the season I will do a head to head manager's league.

Hope the above is ok!! (It took bloody ages so it better be )

[Denther]

FA Statement

We at the FA have been asked to comment on the progress of the new.. 'breed' of managers. We have noticed that Mr Blanco has been doing very well at Welling, indeed they are top of the league. However the FA are looking into reports of opposing players pets going missing before matches Welling. It is reported that a note was left in place of the pets saying "lose or Fluffy gets it".

Ben Cee has also been doing very well, but clearly this is only because his Ass man happens to have a very nice arse which is putting the opposing teams off.

Mr Ralph is doing exactly as we predicted, steering Bognor towards 21st place.

The FA are happy that Mr Blowcrapup looks like he will relegate Blyth, they would be disappointed if he didn't emulate his beloved Newcastle.

It would seem that Charlie Zhang is having trouble communicating with his players at Stalybridge, at half time the players return to the pitch still wondering what on earth they have been told to do, hence the poor league position.

Another notable point is that Mr Josephkeeps storming out of press conferences, apparently this is to avoid any questions relating to unusual betting patterns around Bromley's games.

The FA will comment on the other managers further into the season.

[BenArsenal]

Oi!

"Fears the fans will drive me out of the club?"

Bloody ingrates. They only come to look at Rachel.

[coldkohmew]

Charile Zhang only talks to good players =P

[PluckaDuck]

Awesome update mate, With no Team Bath to support, I think I'm going to support Bognor Regis based on the fact that the town's picture on Wikipedia looks rather similar to my local area!

I was desperate okay!!!!

[hamilton162]

Great start for me, 4th in the league with a game in hand, will go top if we win Hamilton Jr scoring loads as well

KUTGW

[iamjerome]

looking brilliant so far! controversial..

[Blanco]

Undefeated, 6 points clear at the top and still disappointed with the way things are going...

Perfectionist, me

[fergysafc]

tamworth manager 2nd in manager of the month

[Denther]

Thank you all for your kind words

I have holidayed to February 1st, and there are some big movers. At least one team has fallen down the table like a proverbial sack of spuds and at least one team has decided they prefer the top of the table to the bottom

I haven't checked to see if everyone is still at their clubs though...

Hopefully the next update should be up by the weekend

[crouchie]

brilliant start! manager of the month for sept and top of the league ! love that im considering my options after 5 minutes in the job! i am the special 1 and should be managing much higher up the divisions clearly haha!

[Hamuel]

Great work Denther!

Charlie Crabs is only dissapointed as junior hasn't got a single card yet. If he keeps that up charlie will send the boys round to toughen him up a bit.

[Denther]

Hey guys,

just getting some screenies for the next update, but not sure what manager pics to put. What do people want to see, I am saving things like their history until the end of the season, but does anyone want anything specific apart from the non manager stuff like league tables, awards and results?

Cheers

[hamilton162]

Player Stats for the division would be nice Denther if you don't mind, it is only 1 extra screenie

[fergysafc]

league tables,Player stats and Team stats

all i can think off

[blowcrapup]

The FA are happy that Mr Blowcrapup looks like he will relegate Blyth, they would be disappointed if he didn't emulate his beloved Newcastle.

That made me laugh. The updates look good and player stats would be a nice screenshot.

[Blanco]

Don't mess with me, senor, or Fluffy gets it....

KUTGW - looking forward to the next update

Bet it's me that falls like a sack of spuds though

[Denther]

The Times

1st February 2009

The Times is pleased to bring you the second update of the season on our favourite FM managers. It's been a good four months for most of our young hopefuls, although a couple have begun to crack under the pressure.

However, we can report that all the managers and their staff are still currently with their initial teams. Although by the look of things this will not be the case by the start of next season.

Let's have a look at the tables then:-

Blue Square North

Blue Square South

The managers are taking the Blue Square North by storm, 5 out of the top 8 teams are managed by them. Jake Nash's AFC Telford are clear leaders at this point, with a comfy 9 point gap to second place Southport. Although I'm sure Tom Hamilton will be happy with 2nd place. Patton Cooper has done a great job to get Workington up to 3rd.

Charlie Zhang has clearly over come the language barrier as Stalybridge have leaped from 16th up to 7th place. Ben Cee continues to a fantastic job, getting Vauxhall up to 8th place is fantastic for a team predicted to finish last. It remains to be seen if Cee can take them to play off glory.

Robert Blowcrapup has converted those draws into wins and Blyth have shot up the table from last to 13th. The only team not to have improved is Stew Ferguson's Tamworth, who have plummeted from 8th place down to 15th and only 4 points above the relegation zone!

The managers aren't doing so well in the Blue Square South. Only two managers are making an impact. Clearly Blanco is the pick of the bunch, guiding Welling to a massive 11 point lead in the table after 26 games. Charlie Crabs is also doing a steady job, AFC Wimbledon are still in third place.

The other three managers aren't doing quite so well. Edward Nelson's Braintree are still languishing in mid table in 12th place. Even worse are Bromley who have slipped from a promising 7th place down to 16th! Sam Ralph has done well to bring Bognor up from 21st to 17th, but he will want to be further than 3 points from relegation come the end of the season.

Unfortunately the poor league form of 2 of our managers has made their positions insecure. (sorry this isn't very clear, it's Tamworth and Bromley near the bottom, I'll try and change it later)

Awards -

The times are pleased to announce that our first player has won player of the month. Congratulations to Tom Hamilton Jr on winning the BSN January Player of the Month.

The managers continue to impress in their respective leagues, especially in the BSN.

BSN October Manager of the Month
BSN November Manager of the Month
BSN December Manager of the Month
BSN January Manager of the Month

BSS October Manager of the Month
BSS November Manager of the Month
BSS December Manager of the Month
BSS January Manager of the Month

Our readers have requested that we give a few more stats for the leagues and we are only too happy to oblige.

BSN Player Stats

In the Blue Square North there are a couple of players who have broken into the top of the stats. Tom Hamilton Jris joint 2nd in the goal scoring stats with 10 goals and Luke Blowcrapup is joint 5th in the assists with 7.

BSS Player Stats

In the BSS there are also two players good (or bad) enough to get to the top of the stats. Miles Johnson is doing brilliantly, he has the highest average rating in the league and has completed 80% of his passes. The other player in the stats is Juan Blanco, although this is because he's picked up a red card!

BSN Team Stats

Tom Hamilton's Southport are currently the in form team. They have won their last 5 home games and 3 of their last 5 away games! They are also the leagues top scorers with 48 goals. AFC Telford, Blyth and Workington are also in very good form of late. Overall the managers' teams are dominating the BSN stat tables!!

BSS Team Stats

The BSS stats reflect the league in that only two of our managers' teams really feature. Although Welling and AFC Wimbledon are doing a good job of topping the stats between them! The only other team to get a mention are Braintree who have won two games in a row.

Cup Update -

Some of our managers have been doing well in the cups.

Congratulations to AFC Telford on reaching the Conference League Cup Quarter Finals. Jake Nash's team narrowly missed out on a semi final place after a 2-1 defeat away to Rushden. They were the only non BSP team to reach the quarter finals.

The Fa Trophy has also seen some good results for our teams, with Bromley already confirmed as quarter finalists, whilst Workington have a replay against Salisbury.

FA Trophy 1st Round
FA Trophy 2nd Round
FA Trophy 3rd Round

The biggest mention in the cups, however, must go to Sam Ralph's Bognor Regis. Bognor made it to round 2 of the FA Cup and were very unlucky to go out against League 2's Port Vale. Bognor managed a 2-2 draw at Port Vale and got a 1-1 draw at home in the replay. Unfortunately they were knocked out on penalties.

FA Cup 4th Round Qualifying
FA Cup 1st Round
FA Cup 2nd Round
FA Cup 2nd Round Replay

The Times has decided not to bring you an update on the managers as such and instead we will wait until the end of the season when we will do a full manager performance comparison and a head to head league table.

However we will update you on their members of staff and their results.

Results -

AFC Telford results 1
AFC Telford results 2
AFC Wimbledon results 1
AFC Wimbledon results 2
Blyth results
Bognor Regis results 1
Bognor Regis results 2
Braintree results
Bromley results
Southport results
Stalybridge results
Tamworth results
Vauxhall results
Welling results
Workington results

Players -

Coop Cooper has only played 13 league games for Workington, probably because his average rating is only 6.37. He's only young but needs to step up his game if he is to feature further in Workington's success.

Jerome Joseph is the only player to have a team interested in buying him. Kilmarnock have seen the potential in the young attacking midfielder, 9 goals in 23 games isn't a bad return. But will Bromley want to let him go?

Juan Blanco has only played a handful of first team games, but when he has played he has impressed. It won't be long before a non competitive average rating of 7.59 sees Blanco cement his place in the Welling first team.

Junior Khanye Jr has also been in good form, with a 7.05 average rating he will be hoping for more first team football at AFC Wimbledon. He has also played twice for the Slovenia under 21's, even scoring a goal.

Liam Ferguson has only started 7 first team games, but will Tamworth look to their talented youngster to propel them back up the table?

Luke Blowcrapup is a first team regular at Blyth and has contributed a decent amount of goals for a right midfielder.

Miles Johnson seems to have taken it upon himself to single handedly drag Bognor up the table. With an average rating of 7.49 and 15 goals in 30 games, the young forward is taking the BSS by storm.

Robert Zhang will be disappointed he has only started 6 games for Stalybridge, especially as in his three cup games he racked up an average rating of 8.35!

Ryan Lamb has emulated his team Braintree by being solid, but mediocre, competent but not outstanding. He's played a lot and he's not rubbish, that's about it really.

Tom Hamilton Jr has been doing well for Southport. With 32 games under his belt, an average rating of 6.93 and 13 goals, the 21 year old forward is going along nicely.

Staff Members -

Rachel Brown and Jamie Schober have been impressing as assistant managers. They have both done well with the reserve teams, with Rachel taking Vauxhall reserves to 5th in group 8 and Jamie taking Telford reserves to 4th place.

Next update will be sometime next week, it might take a bit longer as I want to do the head to head tables etc!!!

[blowcrapup]

Nice update but can I ask one thing. In the job security list can you do something to highlight the sign up managers in it? (Just something like underline them or out a mark next to them using paint).

Other than that it looks great. KUTGW

[BenArsenal]

8th. Awesome.

Rachel doing well with the reserves too. That's my girl.

[crouchie]

haha amazing! running away with the league promotion in 1st season surely! and 3 manager of the month awards! brilliant to see jamie doing well with the resers too! great update once again!

KUTGW

[coldkohmew]

Stalybridge need more fire power =P
More buys then...

[fergysafc]

come on tamworth

[hamilton162]

Great to see me nearly getting manager of the month and my son getting player of the month in Jan 2nd in the league and on an incredible run of form, the title could still be ours

KUTGW Denther

[Coop624]

Just a correction - Coop Cooper is turning out for Workington, not Tamworth..
Otherwise this is a brilliant sign-up KUTGW

[Denther]

Oops, corrected

Thanks again to all for your kind words

Just as a little sneak preview, I've holidayed until 31st May and at least one manager has won promotion, and at least one manager has been sacked .

[crouchie]

start of the season i wouldnt have minded what happened aslong as i kept my job! BUT if im not the promoted team after being 9 points clear there's gonna be some boots flying round that changing room!

[iamjerome]

doing well as a player, dog awful as a manager.. kilmarnock would be an immense trip up though!!!

[Wegason]

If Lamb can develop, hopefully a playoff place won't be out the question next season

[blowcrapup]

Hopefully Blowcrapup didn't get canned.

[M.G.L]

Wow, I knew I had taken on a challenge with Bognor and I think I'm doing pretty well. Especially getting to the 2nd round of the FA Cup
Miles Johnson comes back from injury and is doing excellently!!

[Denther]

The Times

Ferguson left to 'Stew' over career

14th February 2009

The Times can exclusively reveal that the first 'fan' manager has been sacked. Stew Ferguson has been released by Tamworth after a poor run of results has seen them slip into the bottom half of the table. Our reporter David 'O' Dear attended the press conference.

"Mr Ferguson looked very down and upset at the press conference. He was asked a lot about whether he should have even become a manager especially from those that criticised the FA for appointing fans as managers. However Mr Ferguson did say he had learnt from his mistakes and has enjoyed being a manager. He said he intends to get back into the hot seat as soon as possible."

The Times

Ferguson doesn't 'Stew' for long

23rd February 2009

Just 9 days after being sacked by Tamworth, Stew Ferguson has hopped back onto the managerial wagon. Ferguson has been appointed the new boss of Blue Square South side Chelmsford. When asked why they had appointed Mr Ferguson a spokesperson for the club said -

"Well there was a bit of a mix up during the application process, when we saw an application from a Mr Ferguson we jumped to conclusions and offered him the job without an interview. When it turned out it wasn't 'that' Mr Ferguson, or even his son, we told Stew that there had been a mistake and he couldn't have the job. However Stew then spent the entire night camped outside the chairman's house singing 'I will survive'. The chairman gave him the job just so he didn't have to listen to his singing anymore!"

[Denther]

I have taken all the necessary screenshots and will put the end of season update up either tonight or tomorrow. But in the mean time I will post the head to head league table. As all the managers have played different amounts of games I have done the league based on Win %, with any ties being decided by Goal Difference.

I will post the results up of the inter manager games after the update as there may be an important game between two managers that I don't want to reveal until I do the full update.

Win % Table

1st Cristobal Blanco – 
Played – 11     Won – 8     Drawn – 1     Lost – 2     GF – 21     GA – 10    GD - +11    Win % - 72.73
2nd Edward Nelson –
Played – 9      Won – 5     Drawn – 1     Lost – 3     GF – 11     GA – 9     GD - +2     Win % - 55.56
3rd Jake Nash -
Played – 12     Won – 6     Drawn – 3     Lost – 3     GF – 20     GA – 14    GD - +6     Win % - 50.00
4th Patton Cooper -
Played – 14     Won – 7     Drawn – 2     Lost – 5     GF – 19     GA – 18    GD - +1     Win % - 50.00
5th Tom Hamilton –
Played – 13     Won – 6     Drawn – 2     Lost – 5     GF – 18     GA – 17    GD - +1     Win % - 46.15
6th Robert Blowcrapup – 
Played – 11     Won – 5     Drawn – 3     Lost – 3     GF – 15     GA – 13    GD - +2     Win % - 45.46
7th Josy Joseph -
Played – 11     Won – 5     Drawn – 0     Lost – 6     GF – 12     GA – 16    GD - -4     Win % - 45.46
8th Charlie Crabs -
Played – 9      Won – 4     Drawn – 2     Lost – 3     GF – 12     GA – 8     GD - +4     Win % - 44.44
9th Ben Cee -
Played – 12     Won – 3     Drawn – 2     Lost – 7     GF – 10     GA – 16    GD - -6     Win % - 25.00
10th Charlie Zhang –
Played – 14     Won – 3     Drawn – 6     Lost – 5     GF – 14     GA – 13    GD - +1     Win % - 23.08
11th Stew Ferguson –
Played – 10     Won – 2     Drawn – 1     Lost – 7     GF – 9      GA – 16    GD - -7     Win % - 20.00
12th Sam Ralph –
Played – 12     Won – 2     Drawn – 3     Lost – 7     GF – 10     GA – 19    GD - -9     Win % - 16.67

[crouchie]

nice table but i will be demanding more from the boys next year! 3rd in head to heads just isnt acceptable!

[coldkohmew]

good but lose alot...

[M.G.L]

Well of course I'm bottom. But it is BOGNOR!!!

[hamilton162]

5th aint too bad Looking forward to the end of season update KUTGW

[Blanco]

[looks down on everyone else smugly...]

[Wegason]

2nd, how awesome. Nice table

[Denther]

The Times

31st May 2009

It's been an up and down season for our 'fan' managers, some have taken to management like a proverbial fish to water, whilst others have been managing as if they were Stevie Wonder driving a bus, in the dark, whilst wearing a blindfold.

Fortunately there were more Fish than Wonders. (Although one Wonders how some of them got to be Fish). Anyway enough of that, it's time for the end of season review.

As we already know, Stew Ferguson was sacked by Tamworth in early February, but didn't waste anytime in taking over at Chelmsford. So Stew, if your reading make sure you look at the right table!

Let's have a look at those tables:-

Blue Square North

Blue Square South

In the Blue Square North Jake Nash will be ecstatic with his side AFC Telford finishing top by 7 points. Tom Hamilton's Southport reached the playoffs, however they lost 1-0 at home to Gateshead and 2-0 in the return leg. Their cause wasn't helped by Tom Hamilton Jr being sent off in the first leg!

Patton Cooper's Workington will be disappointed with finishing 6th and missing out on the playoffs by 1 point to Southport. On the flip side Robert Blowcrapup will surely be delighted at guiding Blyth to an 8th place finish, a fantastic achievement. Charlie Zhang's Stalybridge finished 9th, they were always up in the top half but never challenged the top teams, they will be hoping for a better finish next season (if Zhang decides to stay that is!) Finally Ben Cee did a good job in taking Vauxhall to a 14th place finish after being predicted to finish last, but must be disappointed that they didn't improve on their 8th place from February.

In the Blue Square South two of our managers won promotion. Cristobal Blanco's Welling destroyed the league, finishing an amazing 21 points clear of 2nd place Basingstoke.

Two of our 'fan' managers made the playoffs, Charlie Crabs AFC Wimbledon after finishing 3rd and Josy Joseph's Bromley who finished 5th. Both teams made it through their semi finals, with both teams winning the first leg and second leg. The Play off Final was a close run affair, finishing 2-1 to AFC Wimbledon. Both of the managers' players, Jerome Joseph and Junior Khanye Jr featuring. Who knows what would have happened if Jerome hadn't have been injured after AFC's equaliser?

Elsewhere Stew Ferguson took his new club Chelmsford to 7th... lower than when he took over. Edward Nelson's Braintree had a decent run in and climbed from 12th up to 8th, let's see if he can make the play-offs next season. Last and by all means least (but not last ) we have Sam Ralph's Bognor, who I'm sure will be happy with finishing 16th and 9 points above the drop zone.

Overview -

It's been a fairly successful campaign for our fledgling managers, 3 out of the four teams that were promoted were managed by them, with 2 first place spots and three teams in the play offs. All the managers who were at teams tipped for the drop did a sterling job and ensured their teams Blue Square status.

Only one of the managers was sacked, and even then he bounced straight back into management just 9 days later. Josy Joseph's status is no longer insecure, with the Bromley board obviously being satisfied with a play off final. However one manager is in the dog house as it were. The Southport board were not happy with a play off semi final defeat and as a result Tom Hamilton's position is very insecure.

Awards -

And so we come to those all important end of season awards. But first let's get the monthly awards out of the way.

Unfortunately none of our managers or players in the BSN had a very good finish to the season, so no awards for you. However there were some stars in our reasonably priced BSS awards.

Juan Blanco was second and Ryan Lamb was third in the BSS March Player of the month.
Juan Blanco then went one better and won the BSS April Player of the month.

Nobody won the BSS February Manager of the month, but Cristobal Blanco won the BSS March Manager of the month with Charlie Crabs in third place. The BSS April Manager of the month was won by Josy Joseph with Cristobal Blanco coming third in an award he has won three times.

So to the player and manager of the season awards.

The Blue Square North Manager of the season was won by our very own Jake Nash for guiding AFC Telford to first place.

The Blue Square South Manager of the season was dominated by our managers. With Cristobal Blanco (predictably) finishing first, Charlie Crabs finishing 2nd for guiding AFC Wimbledon to playoff victory and surprisingly third place went to Sam Ralph. Clearly Sam impressed by finishing 16th with lowly Bognor.

The Blue Square North Player of the season featured a very happy third place Luke Blowcrapup.

The Blue Square South Player of the season unfortunately did not feature any of our managers' players.

Season Stats -

BSN Player Stats - Luke Blowcrapup was the only BSN player to feature in this with a second place in assists with 16.

BSN Team Stats - quite a few of our BSN teams featured in this, with a special note going to AFC Telford for conceding the fewest goals and having the highest average attendance.

BSN Season Summary - again quite a few of our teams feature, Southport recorded the biggest win, with a 6-0 demolishing of Solihull Moors.

BSS Player Stats - Bognor's Miles Johnson played a big part in their success this season and topped the average ratings with an average of 7.31. he also came second in pass completion after a very good score of 80%. The other player to feature was Welling's Juan Blanco who with 7 man of the matches, came second in that respect.

BSS Team Stats - No prizes for guessing which team tops 5 of the 7 categories. welling have been superb this season, although other teams do feature.

BSS Season Summary - Our 'fan' managers' dominate these stats, with AFC Wimbledon being the pick of the bunch with their 17 game unbeaten run.

And that wraps up the first half of our end of season update, in tomorrow’s paper we will be looking at the cups and giving a run down of all the individual managers, staff and players!

Phew , second half tomorrow

[coldkohmew]

5th lowest conceded so better buy a better striker or two...

[Blanco]

Welling are fb..

Top goalscorers, least conceded, twenty one points clear at the top

CHAMPIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[hamilton162]

Great Update I HATE MY TEAM My son is forgiven though I MUST win promotion and the title next year. HOW THE HELL DID WE END UP 5TH

[BenArsenal]

We survived, which is a good enough target to achieve.

Onwards and upwards!

[crouchie]

WOOOHOOOO champions and won it by 7 points! and manager of the season far more than expected but would like to offer anybody the chance to join in a celebratory rendition of ring of fire!!! scarfs in the air !

cant wait for the conference premier next year, no doubt relegation fight on our hands. Great update once again KUTGW

[Coop624]

haha great sign up.. you didnt get anything wrong with me this time too!!!!!!!

[Wegason]

We can build on this for next season

[M.G.L]

Ah well we'll win next season

[Hamuel]

Wahey! On the way to being back where we belong!

[blowcrapup]

8th Place isn't bad considering the poorish start I had. KUTGW

[Denther]

Ten out of 12 responses, good stuff

The Times

31st May 2009

Welcome to the second part of our end of season review. We will be looking at any cup results that were not included in February, as well as taking a more in depth look at our 'fan' managers and their staff/players.

Cups -

he only cup which any of our managers were left involved in was the FA Trophy. In the Third Round Replay Patton Cooper's Workington were knocked out after a 2-0 loss to Salisbury.

So the only team left was Josy Joseph's Bromley. Unfortunately they suffered exactly the same fate as Workington and were knocked out in the 4th round by Salisbury. Lets hope for some better cup runs next year.

Manager information -

Ben Cee and his stats.

Charlie Crabs and his stats.

Charlie Zhang and his stats.

Cristobal Blanco and his stats.

Edward Nelson and his stats.

Jake Nash and his stats.

Josy Joseph and his stats.

Patton Cooper and his stats.

Robert Blowcrapup and his stats.

Sam Ralph and his stats.

Stew Ferguson and his stats.

Tom Hamilton and his stats.

Staff -

Rachel Brown and Jamie Schober kept up their sterling work in the Reserves Group 8. Rachel guided Vauxhall Reserves to a very respectable 5th place, whilst Jamie emulated his manager Jake Nash by taking AFC Telford Reserves to first place!

Players -

Coop Cooper will be hoping for more first team action next season after only starting 16 games for Workington. Here are his stats.

Jerome Joseph has started a decent amount of games for Bromley, but will want to improve on an average rating of 6.51. Here are his stats.

Juan Blanco will be very happy with his average rating of 7.46 and will be hoping to feature a lot more in the Welling first team next year, especially with a record of 16 goals in 23 games. Here are his stats.

Junior Khanye Jr is another very promising looking youngster. AFC Wimbledon will be hoping he can help them stay up in the Blue Square Premier next season. He has even managed to get 3 under 21 caps with Slovenia and 1 goal. Here are his stats.

Liam Ferguson is the only player not still with his manager. If he doesn't start to get more games for Tamworth he may even look to follow his dad. Here are his stats.

Luke Blowcrapup has played a huge part in Blyth doing so well in the BSN. His 17 assists certainly won't have gone unnoticed by the bigger clubs. Here are his stats.

Miles Johnson has been in brilliant form for Bognor and is one of the main reasons for them doing so well. He obviously likes the cups as he scored 11 goals in 11 cup games! He has been capped by Wales at the under 19 level. Here are his stats.

Robert Zhang has only started 10 games for Stalybridge. Will his dad Charlie Zhang give him more chances next season? Here are his stats.

Ryan Lamb has played in the majority of Braintree's games this season and will be looking to build on his solid, if not spectacular, performances. Here are his stats.

Tom Hamilton Jr has played a lot of games for Southport and scored a few goals. A good first season. Here are his stats.

Results -

Just in case anybody is interested...

AFC Telford results
AFC Wimbledon results
Blyth results
Bognor Regis results
Braintree results
Bromley results
Chelmsford results
Southport results
Stalybridge results
Vauxhall results
Welling results
Workington results

If anybody wants them I have every head to head result written up, but I will only post them if asked for as they are long...

So that concludes the end of season review. We can't wait to see what next season brings, and we are sure you can't either!

Thanks to all who have posted, it gives me the incentive to make nice big, long updates

[BenArsenal]

Rachel did better than me.

KUTGW.

[hamilton162]

WOW Huge update, must have taken ages to write. My son is doing well Southport for Promotion next season

KUTGW

[crouchie]

aw brilliant! Jamie won the reserves league too haha surely bigger teams are gonna show interest soon! gonna milk this while it lasts im sure a downfall is on its way lol!

[Blanco]

BSP here we come!!!!

Watch out, England, the Blanco family are coming!

[iamjerome]

jerome joseph is pretty regular with the goals at least... but not a satisfying performance team wise. good update!

[Wegason]

I consider a 16 goal season, with only 1 from a penalty, a pretty impressive haul for a midfielder

[Coop624]

great work mate keep it up

[coldkohmew]

3 goals in 10 games is not bad...

[Denther]

I consider a 16 goal season, with only 1 from a penalty, a pretty impressive haul for a midfielder

Only 4 assists though, which probably means he's a greedy ball hog who only shoots and never passes

I've holidayed to the 1st October, and surprisingly it seems as though everybody is still at the same club!!

Also, from my brief look at the tables, it doesn't look like many of our managers have had very good starts

Thanks again to all who have contributed KUTGW

[Denther]

The Times

1st October 2009

So here we go again. All of the 'fan' managers have made it to the second season (albeit via another club in one persons case) and will be looking to push on from what was a good season all round last year. As a side note, all of the managers and staff/players have decided to stay put... for now. Here's a quick reminder of who is where-

AFC Telford - Jake Nash and Jamie Schober - BSP
AFC Wimbledon - Charlie Crabs and Junior Khanye Jr - BSP
Welling - Cristobal Blanco and Juan Blanco - BSP

Blyth - Robert Blowcrapup and Luke Blowcrapup - BSN
Southport - Tom Hamilton and Tom Hamilton Jr - BSN
Stalybridge - Charlie Zhang and Robert Zhang - BSN
Tamworth - Liam Ferguson (player) - BSN
Vauxhall - Ben Cee and Rachel Brown - BSN
Workington - Patton Cooper and Coop Cooper - BSN

Bognor - Sam Ralph and Miles Johnson - BSS
Braintree - Edward Nelson and Ryan Lamb - BSS
Bromley - Josy Joseph and Jerome Joseph - BSS
Chelmsford - Stew Ferguson (manager) - BSS

Lets have a look at the tables -

Blue Square Premier

Blue Square North

Blue Square South

Oh dear oh dear, it's not looking good for our managers at this early stage. Only 3 out of 12 are in the top half of their respective leagues!!!

In the Blue Square Premier, Jake Nash will probably be content with 15th place especially when the media predict AFC Telford to be relegated in 22nd. Cristobal Blanco will not be so satisfied, Welling are in 22nd an in danger of being cast adrift at the bottom of the table. The media predict a finish of 23rd. It could be worse though, you could be Charlie Crabs, whose AFC Wimbledon sit dead last, and they are the ones the media are predicting to survive!

Due to AFC Wimbledon's poor position Charlie Crab's position is insecure.

In the Blue Square North there is one glimmer of hope for our managers, it's just a shame that it comes in the shape of a one T. Hamilton, whose Southport currently sit third. After missing out on promotion last season Tom will be hoping for a successful campaign, the media are predicting one. Patton Cooper's Workington are 10th but are already losing touch with those teams in play off positions, although the media don't think they'll get one anyway predicting a 7th place finish.

Robert Blowcrapup's Blyth and Ben Cee's Vauxhall are a bit closer to the relegation zone than they would have liked, sitting 15th and 18th respectively. The media are predicting mid table mediocrity for Blyth, but think Vauxhall's survival last season was a fluke and are predicting relegation. The shock position of the month award goes to Charlie Zhang's Stalybridge who have had an awful start to the campaign and sit 21st, with the media predicting a comfy 8th place finish, nobody is quite sure what is going on, maybe Mr Zhang is luring everybody into a false sense of security and will win the next 30 games? Who knows?!

In the Blue Square South Edward Nelson's Braintree have made a solid start, finding them in 7th place with a game in hand that could see them move into a play-off position. The media are predicting a boring 10th place finish. The other three managers have huddled together in mid table, safety in numbers obviously. Sam Ralph's Bognor have made a solid start and will look to build on their 12th place, although the media think they will collapse and finish bottom. Stew Ferguson's Chelmsford and Josy Joseph's Bromley are the draw kings of the division, with 5 draws each they find themselves 13th and 14th respectively. However Chelmsford are predicted to finish 2nd which means they must start winning if Stew isn't to lose his job for the second time. Josy isn't under so much pressure as Bromley are predicted to finish just outside the play-offs in 6th.

Awards -

Blue Square Premier

Only two awards for our newly promoted teams in the BSP.

Juan Blanco won the August goal of the month competition and also came second in the August young player of the month.

Blue Square North

Only one award in the BSN and that was a second place September manager of the month for Tom Hamilton.

Blue Square South

A whole three awards in the BSS, go easy lads! Edward Nelson won the August manager of the month, whilst Sam Ralph come second in the September manager of the month.

Miles Johnson continues to impress for Bognor and won the September player of the month.

As it is so early in the season we will leave player and team stats until the next update, along with an update on the cups.

Staff -

Rachel Brown must not want to outshine Ben Cee again this season as the Vauxhall reserves are currently 13th in reserve group 9.
Jamie Schober has a tough job with AFC Telford reserves this season, 10th out of 11 in the reserves group 3 may sound bad, but with teams like Nottingham Forest and West Brom in their group, it really isn't!

Players -

Surprisingly, nobody is interested in signing our players at this time.

Coop Cooper has now got 3 Australia U21 caps, but that's where the good news stops. He has struggled for form for Workington with an average rating of 5.78 and has picked up 2 red cards, in non-competitive action, already!!

Jerome Joseph has had a solid start, playing most of Bromley's games, but will want to improve on an average rating of 6.37.

Juan Blanco has been excellent for struggling Welling, scoring 5 goals in 12 games with an average rating of 7.19, but whether he can inspire Welling to drag themselves out of the BSP relegation zone remains to be seen.

Junior Khanye Jr has added to his Slovenia U21 caps, he now has 5. However he has only started 3 games for AFC Wimbledon and will surely be eager to start more and help them out of the bottom 4.

Liam Ferguson is at least getting games for Tamworth this season. He has impressed in the cups with 3 goals in 2 games.

Luke Blowcrapup is playing well for Blyth and has already got 4 assists and 2 goals in only 7 league games. He has also been appointed the Blyth captain, perhaps a bit of favouritism there from his dad?

Miles Johnson is the pick of the players by a long way. 7 goals, 6 assists and 5 man of the matches with an average rating of 8.02 in 9 games! It can't be long before some big teams come in to take Miles away from lowly Bognor surely?

Robert Zhang has been 'ok' for Stalybridge, but perhaps a lift in his performances could lift them out of the bottom three?

Ryan Lamb is another of our players to have been appointed club captain. He has been playing very well for Braintree with 4 goals in 8 matches, along with 4 assists which equals the amount he got in the whole of last season! Edward Nelson will be hoping that Ryan recovers from his fractured arm in double quick time!

Tom Hamilton Jr has been appointed Southport club captain, more favouritism from one of our managers? He's made a solid if not spectacular start to the season with 3 goals in 8 games.

Results and Transfers -

All of our managers have had big clear outs this summer, clearing out all the dead-wood. Most have also brought in quite a few new faces, perhaps this explains the bad start they have made and once the players have settled as a unit we will see our managers shoot up the tables?

AFC Telford - Results and Transfers

AFC Wimbledon - Results and Transfers

Blyth - Results and Transfers

Bognor - Results and Transfers

Braintree - Results and Transfers

Bromley - Results and Transfers

Chelmsford - Results and Transfers

Southport - Results and Transfers

Stalybridge - Results and Transfers

Vauxhall - Results and Transfers

Welling - Results and Transfers

Workington - Results and Transfers

Let's hope that the managers buck up their ideas by 1st February so that I can do a happy update next time

The next update is likely to be early next week sometime.

[Wegason]

Lamb looks like this might be a cracking season for him. Hopefully Braintree can promote this year

[BenArsenal]

I'm out of the relegation zone, which I suppose is good enough for now.

I released a lot of players.

[Denther]

Just as a sneak preview, I have holidayed until 1st February 2010, and two of our managers do not have jobs

[hamilton162]

Let's hope that the managers buck up their ideas by 1st February so that I can do a happy update next time

What do you mean that it wasn't a happy update, i am 3rd BTW, there is no screenshot for the Southport Transfers

[Denther]

What do you mean that it wasn't a happy update, i am 3rd BTW, there is no screenshot for the Southport Transfers

My bad, fixed now

[crouchie]

15th in BSP not bad not bad! certainly happy just to be out of the relegation zone! and as for Jamie and the resers.......good luck haha

[coldkohmew]

Looks bad ,maybe not...

[Denther]

The Times

Zhang left out in the 'Cold'

10th October 2009

The times has learnt that after a shocking start to the season Stalybridge have sacked manager Charlie Zhang. Labelled by the FA as the 'Baba' Sven, it looks as though Zhang should have concentrated more on his football tactics and less on his tactics in pulling women. Zhang was unavailable for comment but Stalybridge released this statement:-

We thank Charlie for his time spent at Stalybridge, however there were a few issues which meant his position had become untenable. Only talking to good players was a problem that Charlie had, especially as Stalybridge have no good players. This meant that there was little communication between the manager and players.

Also Charlie would often not turn up for training sessions, this would be explained by photos in the papers on those days showing Charlie out on the town with lots of women. Therefore we had to let Charlie leave.

[Denther]

The Times

Joseph and his Bromley Coloured Nightmare

26th January 2010

Breaking news, the Times has learnt that just days before our second update of the season Bromley have sacked manager Josy Joseph. Joseph led Bromley to the BSS play off final last season but has not followed up the form this season. After a shocking 6 defeats in 7 league games Bromley find themselves in the relegation zone.

Joseph has been a controversial figure, but his results last season meant that nobody would question his managerial position. However the run of bad results have seen the bad tempered Joseph lose his job. Bromley released this statement:-

Joseph joined us after bribing the FA to let him become a manager. The bribes continued and this saw Bromley reach the Play off final last year. However AFC Wimbledon manager Charlie Crabs would not accept money to throw the game and so they beat us. This season Josy has ran out of money, therefore he could not bribe anyone and just look what that led to...

[Blanco]

Phew.... glad I haven't been sacked...

Are we getting an update of everyone today?

[Denther]

Phew.... glad I haven't been sacked...

Are we getting an update of everyone today?

Not today I'm afraid, had a busy weekend, will try and take the screenies tonight and hopefully the update will be tommorow

[iamjerome]

hmphhh

[PluckaDuck]

Damn, I so wish I had taken the time to sign up now, Brilliant sign-up mate and I will continue to follow!!!

[crouchie]

haha gutting for the two sacked managers but brilliant mini updates! KUTGW

[coldkohmew]

Charlie too busy that's why =P

[Denther]

The Times

So we come to the second update of the second season. After a disappointing start to the season, things haven't got much better for our 'fan' managers. As we know two of them are currently out of a job, indeed Charlie Zhang hasn't had a job for nearly 4 months! He is obviously enjoying his 'free time' a little too much!!

So to the tables:-

Blue Square Premier

Blue Square North

Blue Square South

The Blue Square Premier is very very close at the bottom, only 2 points separate 17th from 22nd. Jake Nash's AFC Telford are out of the relegation zone in 18th, but only by 1 point! Cristobal Blanco's Welling and Charlie Crabs AFC Wimbledon are only one point behind AFC Telford, in 21st and 22nd respectively. It's going to be very close come the end of the season, will they all survive, or will there be a return trip to the lower leagues for our 'fan' managers?

The Blue Square North is the only league where our managers are finding any kind of success. Patton Cooper has mustered his troops and has guided Workington to 2nd place in the table, a fantastic achievement. Tom Hamilton's Southport are currently in 4th place, but if they win their game in hand they can go top. Will we see another 'fan' manager top of the BSN again come May? At the other end of the table Robert Blowcrapup's Blyth and Ben Cee's Vauxhall look like they are safe from relegation but must still be disappointed with being 14th and 16th respectively. They don't seem to have built on last season at all.

More mediocre management can be found in the Blue Square South. Edward Nelson's Braintree are the highest placed team, they are currently sitting in 8th place. However, they are 5 points off the play-offs and so will need a good run in if they are to finish anywhere of significance this season. Stew Ferguson's Chelmsford were tipped for big things and surely cannot be happy with 12th place? Finally Bognor will be content, if not thrilled, with their 15th place, away from relegation. As a side note, as Josy Joseph was only sacked a few days before the update, we should note Bromley's position in the relegation zone, tut tut.

I forgot the job security screenie, so I have no idea on the managers' job status, if I remember, I will put it up tonight.

Awards -

Only the one award of note in the Blue Square Premier and that was Juan Blanco coming third in the January young player of the month. The young Welling player has been in great form this season.

In the Blue Square North manager of the month awards, one of our managers has been involved in them all (there wasn't one for November due to only a handful of games being played).

Patton Cooper has been doing an excellent job and won the October and January manager of the month awards, whilst also finishing second in December. Well done, and perhaps some of the other managers should take note. Indeed, as a little side note perhaps Charlie Zhang should take note of the December manager of the month and his team!!!

In the Blue Square South everybody has been rubbish and as a result nobody has won any awards. Boo Hiss.

Stats -

Blue Square Premier - Team Stats

Recent form would suggest that Welling and AFC Wimbledon are on the march, Blanco's team currently have the best away form, and Crab's team are 7th in the form book. Can this improvement see them both escape relegation? Also AFC Wimbledon and AFC Telford continue to draw decent crowds.

Blue Square Premier - Player Stats

Juan Blanco is joint third in the man of match stats with 6, joint second top scorer with 16 goals, but even better he is the top rated player in the league, with an average rating of 7.42. Does Blanco hold the key to Welling staying up? We think he does.

Blue Square North - Team Stats

Workington and Southport dominate the team stats, but Blyth have also snuck in and seem to be picking up their form. Both Workington and Southport have won their last 5 home games, whilst Blyth haven't lost in their last 5 away games. Unfortunately, there is no mention of Ben Cee's Vauxhall...

Blue Square North - Player Stats

The mighty mighty Luke Blowcrapup flies the flag for our BSN players, he has the most assists with 12 and has a very healthy 5 man of the matches. Blyth could do with 11 Luke Blowcrapups.

Blue Square South - Team Stats

Chelmsford actually have the best defence in the league, shame they have crap strikers. Bognor have the opposite problem, they are the 6th top scorers in the league but have rubbish defenders! Braintree have also scored a lot of goals, the 3rd highest amount in the league, but again their defence is letting them down.

Blue Square South - Player Stats

It's that man again, Miles Johnson. A good scoring record with 12 goals and the second best rating in the league with 7.37, where would Bognor be without him? Relegated we expect.

Cup Update -

It's been an ok season in the cups for our managers, especially in the FA Trophy.

In the Conference League Cup AFC Wimbledon were knocked out in the Southern fourth round by Salisbury, along with Welling who were trounced 4-0 by Woking. Southport faired better in the Northern fourth round and recorded an impressive 3-2 extra time win over BSP Northwich. However, there was no fairy tale ending, as they were beaten 3-1 by Gateshead in the Quarter Final.

A few of our teams did well in the FA Cup.

FA Cup Third Round Qualifying
FA Cup Fourth Round Qualifying
FA Cup First Round
FA Cup Second Round

Four of our teams made the 1st round proper, but three were knocked out. Workington lost 2-0 to League 2 Lincoln, AFC Telford were unlucky to draw Leeds and were soundly beaten 5-0, and AFC Wimbledon were unlucky to lose 2-1 against League 2's Grimsby. However Chelmsford made up for their poor league form by beating Kettering 2-1. However in the second round they faced a tough game against League 1's Hartlepool and were beaten 4-0.

The only cup which any of our managers are left in is the FA Trophy.

FA Trophy First Round
FA Trophy Second Round
FA Trophy Third Round

Four of our teams reached the Third round (excluding Bromley). AFC Wimbledon were knocked out by the same team that knocked them out of the CLC, Salisbury, whilst Welling lost 4-2 to York. However, Southport continued their good cup run and reached the Quarter finals by beating Grays 2-1. Blyth drew 2-2 with Stafford and so now must have a replay.

Staff Members -

Jamie Schober is having a torrid time with the AFC Telford Reserves who find themselves joint bottom of reserves group three, with only one win!

Rachel Brown is once again proving she is better than Ben Cee and has guided Vauxhall Reserves to 4th in the reserves group 9.

Players -

Coop Cooper has added to his Australia under 21 caps, but has been in dreadful form for Workington. Because of his 5.99 average rating he has only started 12 games. Must do better.

Jerome Joseph has been doing ok with Bromley, he has made 28 starts and has an average rating of 6.48, but how will the sacking of his dad effect him? On a brighter note, he is the first 'fan' manager player to be capped at full international level. He made his debut for India against Malaysia and was named man of the match.

Juan Blanco, as already mentioned, has been in fantastic form for Welling. If he can add to his 20 goals then Welling may well stay in the BSP, at least for 1 more season.

Junior Khanye Jr still isn't getting many games for AFC Wimbledon. However he does now have 6 Slovenian under 21 caps and when he has played for AFC Wimbledon he has done well, especially in the cups.

Liam Ferguson has been in good form for Tamworth, he's started most of their games and has a respectable average rating of 6.86. This good form has led to TNS showing interest in our young player, could a move to Wales be on the cards?

Luke Blowcrapup has been in good form for Blyth. 10 goals, 15 assists and 5 man of the matches in 32 games is a good return for a midfielder.

Miles Johnson continues toiling away at Bognor. With 14 goals and an average rating of 7.45 many wonder why he is still at Bognor. It can't be the nightlife can it?

Robert Zhang seems to have suffered since the loss of his father to the managerial wilderness, an average rating of 6.15 just isn't very good.

Ryan Lamb is very much like the the team he plays for, Braintree, he plays well and is solid, but he's just not quite there yet. 11 goals and an average rating of 6.72 provides a solid base, can he help Braintree push for the play-offs?

Tom Hamilton Jr, played a few games, scored a few goals, got injured, meh.

Results -

AFC Telford Results

AFC Wimbledon Results

Blyth Results

Bognor Results

Braintree Results

Bromley Results

Chelmsford Results 1
Chelmsford Results 2

Southport Results 1
Southport Results 2

Stalybridge Results

Vauxhall Results

Welling Results

Workington Results

And so conlcudes the second update of the second season.

Will Zhang and Joseph find a club, will any body make a move. Who will go up, who will go down? And most importantly, who will be top of the head to head table? Find out in the final update of the season!

There you go!! Thanks again to the people who are posting, and it's good to know that people not involved are still following

Next update may not be until next week, although if I find time to do it before, I will!!

[BenArsenal]

My fiancee is a better manager than me...

[Blanco]

Come on Welling! Get yourself out of the drop zone...

Still, Blanco looks like the best of the players so far, but I guess it looks like he'll move on sooner rather than later

[crouchie]

blimey its tight at the bottom! one point off the relegation zone! PLEASE STAY UP! as for jamie and the resers...i know its a tough league but pull your bloody finger out!

Oh and the less said about the 5-0 thrashin by leeds the better i think!

[Wegason]

We need to push for the playoffs!

[hamilton162]

A good season so far, hopefully we can win our game in hand to go top and stay there for the rest of the season 1/4 finals of the FA Trophy is also good

KUTGW

[coldkohmew]

Nothing to say...

[Hamuel]

I trust Crabs to get us out of this. He'll find a way I know it!

[Denther]

Oh my,

Holidayed to the end of the season, very interesting

Promotion(s) - tick
Relegation(s) - tick
Transfer(s) - tick
Unemployed Manager(s) - tick
Play-off(s) - tick
Foreign Team(s)/League(s) - tick

And that was just after taking a quick glimpse, I haven't looked at awards/cups etc