Touchline bans - Why can't I get instructions to my assman?

In real life when a manager is serving a touchline ban they are always able to get messages to their assman and effectively direct the game from the stands. Whether thats by mobile, text, a running minion or sneaking into a laundry basket.

Now I serve my fair share of touchline bans, mainly because from where I sit the ref is invariably wrong Once I've chosen my team, I then have no way of effecting the game. I want a mobile phone, with the extravagant salary I'm paid you'd think I'd have a mobile right? Or whatever, but anyway I want to be able to pass instructions to the assman, how well he implements them could be a variable based on his attributes to give this feature more depth.

Anyone else want this?

because if this option was available there would be no difference between serving a ban and not serving a ban, rendering touchline bans useless

Thats why I suggest a variable of assman interpretation. The same can be said for RL.

This is one of the areas where the game behaves as a game. Adding more to this section would render the suspension irrelevant and frankly there are other areas that need more work.

You aren't allowed...though there was rumour that the special one did ring the ass man from his hotel room once when banned from the touchline

No you aren't allowed, but that doesn't stop it happening.