The Premier League Awards

We all know about the yearly football awards that take place for every league after a gruelling season of football. Players, managers & even media pundits get together and cast their vote on who they believe is the best player. Unfortunately, in real world football, the winners can only be decided by matter of opinion. In Football Manager, however, and using the various stats on offer, we can reach a conclusion, by fact, who is the best, and so the Premier League Awards were born. The wards are beginning now, who will win the prizes on offer? Lets cross over to Milton Starsilver at the Awards ceremony at The Royal Albert Hall

Albert Hall June 09

“Hello there, and welcome to the First Annual Premier League Awards at the magnificent Albert Hall. I’m your host, Milton Starsilver. The Premier League Awards is different to any other football award ceremony, as we will be deciding the awards on a number of statitisctics taken from Football Manager. If all isn’t clear now, then it will become so soon. Without futher adew, the categories are:

Worst Player In The League

Young Player Of The Year

Manager Of The Year

Striker Of The Year

Veteran Of The Year

Player Of The Year

And The Lifetime Achievement Award

Our first category is: Worst Player Of The Year. We thought long and hard about this category, and eventually decided that it could be an eye opener for the players.. The way we measure The Worst Player is to replace Hull with a team of candidates for worst player of the year. The player with the lowest average rating over the course of the season will win the award. The candidates are

Brad Jones: The Aussie goalie has taken the reigns from countryman Schwarzer, who may well of been the reason he signed. A number of clangers puts him in the frame.

Scott Casron: Largely blamed for destroying England’s EURO 2008 campaign. Failed loan spells at Villa & Charlton have led him to West Brom, where he managed to lead them to 20th. Can he fare better in this new season?

Paul McShane: The Irish full-back has become a major booboy for Sunderland fans. His lack of positional sense & his running & reaction pace means he has been a strikers dream for the past year.

Andy Griffin: “Fattie” managed to lead Derby to the lowest total ever total in 08. His utter lack of fitness and sheer dodginess gets him in our team.

Leon Barnett: the nervy Centre-back is prone to mistakes and looks more like a league 1 player.

Titus Bramble: There was a vicious rumour from sections of Wigan fans that Bramble’s from is beginning to pick up. The selection committee was not prepared to take the chance, however.

Fabricio Collccini: There was no way Newcastle were going to get away at the back, and its 10m man Colloccini who bears the brunt. The utter lack of value for money makes him a shoe-in.

Nani: A controversial choice, maybe, but Nani has failed to live up to expectations. The £17 Million man looks barely worth a tenth of that figure. A showpony with no end product.

John Utaka: Utaka has failed to live up to expectations, and, his record of 6 goals in almost 50 games isn’t good enough for £7 million.

Luis Boa Morte; Largely overpaid and largely disappointing at West Ham

Nicky Butt: He may have a collection of medals, but two relegations have proved that Butt was nothing more than riding on the success of his more talented United team-mates.

Lucas: One of Benietez’s crazier signings. Dosen’t offer the skill, effort or talent needed for Liverpool.

Dean Marney: Not good enough for this level, and has struggled to adapt to the league.

Alfonso Alves: Lazy, fat and over-rated. Alves was one of Southgate’s inflated & frankly, dreadful signings.

Mido: Much alike Alves, the overweight, grumpy Egyptian hasn’t settled at Boro.

David Nugent: For all of the good Redknapp signings, Nugent was on a long list of poor ones. Couldn’t hit a barn door and, must step down a level.

Darius Vassell: A major disappointment. Vassell has faded into insignificance at City.

The Team is set, the world is ready. Lets join the action...

Dean Marney ftw

Mid October: The Worst XI, after 8 games, find themselves bottom of The Premiership with their only point coming on the opening day of the season against Blackburn. 5-0 & 5-1 defeats to United & Chelsea have set the tone for the season, in which every player is a candidate for the award.

Current Top 5 (Players Must Have Played 30% Of Games)

1. Andy Griffin (Apps 10) Avg 5.99

2. John Utaka (Apps 9) Avg 6.39

3. Titus Bramble (Apps7) Avg 6.43

4. David Nugent ( Apps 9) Avg 6.49

5. Paul Mcshane (Apps 8) Avg 6.51

Mid January: The Worst XI still remain bottom of The Premier League but have picked up a notable win against money bags Man City with Alfonso Alves & Nani picking up goals in a 2-1 win. Alves has been one of the few bright sparks with 5 goals, along with Lucas, whose tough tackling never say die attitude has attracted interest. But bright sparks have been far and few between as the Worst XI live up to their reputation as the Worst Team in the league.

Current Top 5 (Players Must Of Played 30% Of Games)

1. Andy Griffin (Apps 23) Avg 6.03

2. Dave Nugent (Apps 20) Avg 6.25

3. Paul McShane (Apps 22) Avg 6.48

4. Titus Bramble (Apps 24) Avg 6.49

5. John Utaka (Apps 22) Avg 6.53

The team

April: Still bottom at the start of April with just 12 points, The Worst XI look certain for relegation. They did snatch a stunning victory over Newcastle and dented Chelsea’s title push with a 0-0 rearguard draw. But, it dosen’t look like enough to save them from the drop. Meanwhile, Andy Griffin continues to lead the way as Worst Player followed closely by Dave Nugent.

Current Top 5 (Players Must Of Played 30% Of Games)

1. Andy Griffin (Apps 28) Avg 6.20

2. Dave Nugent (Apps 22) Avg 6.27

3. Luis Boa Morte (Apps 25) Avg 6.55

4. Titus Bramble (Apps 29) Avg 6.56

5. Paul McShane (Apps 29) Avg 6.57

The average race, as of April

Season End: After a gruelling season which included just 2 wins and 27 losses, The Worst XI suffered inevitable relegation. Tough tackling Liverpool man Lucas managed to come out of experience with some credibility, winning Fans Player Of The Year and being linked with moves to Lyon. His “success” however was an isolated case, with most failing miserably. With the season over, lets head back to Milton in the studio.

(APPLAUSE)

“Thank you. It’s now time for the award, and here to present it is a player who knows all about being booboy’s. Ade Akinbyi & Carlton Palmer!”

(APPLAUSE. OSCAR STYLE MUSIC PLAYS AS PALMER READIES HIMSELF)

ADE: Thanks, Milton. The Worst Player Of The Year should not be called an award. It should be an education. To the fans, to the clubs & to the players themselves. It’s a warning. Something to tell them to improve or else they’re gone.

CARLTON: And now of the nominations, or top 5, for Worst Player Of The Year:

David Nugent!

ADE: Luis Boa Morte!

CARLTON: Dean Marney!

ADE: Andy Griffin!

CARLTON: And Darius Vassell!

ADE: And the winner is…..David Nugent!

(APPLAUSE & JEERING)

PA: Some would say major shock, but Pompey man David Nugent has done it, pipping long time leader Andy Griffin to the post on the final hurdle by just .03 of a rating.

NUGENT: I would just like to say, that this award is an unexpected disappointment for me, and I am gutted. I would like to blame Harry…Harry Redknapp for not giving me my chance at Portsmouth, my agent for persuading me to go there, and of course, to myself for scoring just 1 goal in 2 entire seasons.

Ha, this is a good little read. Certainly an innovative way of poking fun at some of the less talented players of the Premiership.

Hahaha good update mate Enjoyed reading that

this looks good idea

Glad to see Titus Bramble not labeled the worst player for a change

will be following this, KUTGW

amazing idea kutgw

I love it simply

pretty good light-hearted fun here

Nice idea, looking forward to the next instalment.

Thanks for the positive comments guys. It really gives me motivation!

MILTON: Thanks for that Carlton and Ade. Now, we move onto our next award. The Young Player Of The Year award rewards the top youngsters in England. Many of the players are playing or will almost certainly play for the country as players get younger & younger. The format works in the same way. The youngster are placed on a team together, only this time it’s the highest rating that wins. However, an extraordinary performance from an individual either 20+ assists or 20+ goals will automatically take hem to the award. All players must be 21 or under, but there will be a twist. A wildcard from a club outside the top 6 will be chosen, and will help decide just how over or under rated these youngsters are. The team will consist of:

Vito Mannone: Makes the cut in an area greatly deprived of any established youngster. Mannone is yet to establish himself at Arsenal and is an outsider.

Ben Amos: A hot prospect at United, but like Mannone has yet to establish himself and is way down the pecking order. Will struggle to get the Number 1 Jersey.

Micah Richards: City’s highly-rated England International. Has captained City on a number of occasions, combining his brute strength and power at the back with an eye for goal, Richards is the total modern attacking full-back.

Rafael: The Brazilian full-back joined with brother Fabio, but has so far made a greater impression than his twin. Often appearing at his favoured right-back role, Rafael collected a winners medal and was a nominee for PFA Young Player Of The Year.

Michael Mancienne: A surprise call-up to a recent England squad, Mancienne has displayed his undoubted ability in Wolves’ promotion push, which led to him earning a Chelsea debut late on in the year.

Jonny Evans: The centre-back enjoyed two successful loan spells at Sunderland, and showed maturity & reliability when filling in for united last season. An impressive talent.

Alex Song: The versataile Arsenal man is one of Arsenals Wenger’s many future stars, and has often filled in in midfield & defence.

Kieran Gibbs: One of the few Englishmen on Arsenal’s books, Gibbs has broke into the first-team and featured in two Champions League semi-finals against Man United, albeit his slip was a contributory factor in Arsenal’s plight.

Gareth Bale: The Welshman came through the Southampton Academy and impressed before being snapped up by Spurs for 10 Million, however his spell has been dogged by injury and is yet to be on the winning side whilst playing for the London club.

Samir Nasri: “the next Zidane” has made a decent start to Premiership life after joining from Marseille. He may have a chance of taking the award.

Zoran Tosic: The Serbian has a big reputation, and could really do something special in his first full year.

Anderson: The Brazil man joined United for a massive £18 million, but hasn’t had a real chance to show his undoubted talent. A move to the Youngsters could be just the thing he needs.

Michael Johnson: Has impressed for City in what little has been seen of him. Injury hampered most of his career, but Johnson is a definite prospect.

Maruoane Fellaini: It’s hard to believe that Everton’s record signing is still only 21. Fellaini has shown maturity, commitment and an eye for goal since joining the toffees for £15 Million. He has impressed so far, but can he keep up the good work?

Theo Walcott: A major favourite. With exceptional pace and dribbling skills, flair and a wicked shot, Walcott has become a fixture for Arsenal and England. Operating either out on the right or up front, Walcott will be a burden for defenders in The Premiership for this year and many to come

Scott Sinclair: Has yet to make an impact in The Premiership, but shot to fame whilst on loan at Plymouth, running half the length of the pitch before slotting the ball home. A certain future star and a rival to Walcott.

Gabriel Agbonlahor: The speedy frontman has been banging in goals left right and centre for Villa, and has formed a formidable partnership with Ashley Young and John Carew which has helped rocket the club up the table. A dark horse.

Carlos Vela: His impact on Arsenal was delayed slightly due to Work Permits and the partnership of Adebayor and Van Persie. But from the little seen of him (mostly in The League Cup) it’s clear he is an exceptional talent who should not be taken lightly.

James Vaughan: The youngster scorer ever in the Premiership, Vaughan was tipped to follow Rooney to fame & fortune. He certainly has the talent, but his career has taken a slight backstep. Can he come of age in time to win?

Wildcard: Ryan Shawcross: Let go by Sir Alex, Shawcross is out to make the Scot’s face even more read by shocking the world and taking this award.

With the nominees in place, lets join the action....

Good work

Expecting Nasri or Anderson to win this tbh

This is good and there is lots of other squad ideas possible.

come on sinclair!!!!

I think i am alone on this one

p.s by January man city will by all of these players

Only just noticed this, great thread

Nugent

Brilliant thread, very good idea

Come on Anderson or Rafael!

any arsenal player.... but i fear the thread is dead already :-(

Apologies for a lack of updates. The reason I have not been updating this is because I have been on holiday. In the frantic build-up, I forgot to notify you all that there would not be any updates for a few weeks, and since I wasn't staying in a hotel, there was no PC to use.

Expect a new update soon.

Excellent

I'm going to jump in and hope for a Anderson win. Loved the Worst Player of The Year idea btw.

Mid October: The Youngsters haven't been exactly blistering, but they still lie in 14th place.

Top 5 Players (Must Have Played 30% Of Games)

1. Theo Walcott (Apps 9) Avg. 7.07

2. Samir Nasri (Apps 5) Avg 7.05

3. Rafael (Apps 4.) Avg 7.00

4. Gareth Bale (Apps 9) Avg 6.99

5. Anderson (Apps 5) Avg 6.98

The team

The race remains close, with just .09 separating our top 5. If someone hits real form, they will soon be leading.

Mid January: The Youngsters have fell considerably to 19th, with many citing a lack of leadership & experience as their main flaw. They did, however, secure a famous 2-0 win over Man United thanks to a Vela brace.

The table

The United win was a high in a year of lows

Top 5 Players

1. Zoran Tosic (Apps 18) Avg. 7.03

2. Samir Nasri (Apps 14). Avg 7.00

3. Theo Walcott (Apps 19) Avg. 6.96

4. Rafael (Apps 13) Avg 6.94

5. Anderson (Apps 19) Avg 6.94

Zoran Tosic has come from literally nowehere to overtake Nasri and Walcott and become the new favourite. It would certainly be a suprise for United's new youngster to take the title, having had to play second fiddle to Ronaldo. But, his position at the top is not yet safe.

April: With just 9 games remaining, The Youngsters have a mountain to climb, finding themselves 7 points adrift and only 4 registered wins. Can the youngsters pull themselves together?

The table, as of April

Top 5 Players

1. Samir Nasri Apps 23 Avg 7.04

2. Zoran Tosic Apps 23 Avg 6.99

3. Theo Walcott Apps 26 Avg 6.96

4. Rafael Apps 20 Avg 6.96

5. Anderson Apps 23 Avg 6.94

So, after consistantly holding second place, Samir Nasri takes the lead from Zoran Tosic by .05. The the next three positions remain unchanged, with Rafael leading the way for defenders. Can anyone find the form to challenge Nasri? Lets cross back to the studio to find out.

MILTON: Unfortunately, The Youngsters failed in their fight to stop up and finished 19th, 11 points away from the drop zone. Their inability to score goals cost them dearly.

Okay, lets get down to buisness and find out the winner of The Young Player Of The Year. To present the award, two men of great stature. One is a two time winner nicknamed "God", and he other is a man that despite being annoying & Scottish still gets a commentary deal on English Football, it's Robbie Fowler & Andy Gray!

ANDY: The Young Player Of The Year is an award that every youngster will want to win so they can go on and have a succesful career in the media industry, Robbie.

ROBBIE: The award is the perfect stepping stone for any youngster towards superstardom, to win this award, you must have consistancy, skill & most importantly, talent.

ANDY: And now, the nominations, or top 5, for Young Player Of The Year!

ROBBIE: Anderson!

ANDY: Zoran Tosic!

ROBBIE: Samir Nasri!

ANDY: Rafael!

ROBBIE: And Theo Walcott!

ANDY: And the winner is....Samir Nasri!

PA: Well Samir Nasri, "the next Zidane", can add the Young Player Of The Year to his list of honours. He just pipped Anderson by .04 with a score 7.04. Congratulations to Theo Walcott who claimed third, Zoran Tosic who finished fourth & Rafael who rounded out the top 5 as top defender.

NASRI: Hello everyone, I'm delighted to of claimed this award. It's staggering to think where I've come in 20 years. I'd like to thank my parents, Arsene Wenger for giving me the chance in this league and my fans.

excellent stuff. kutgw

Nice work frot. Well my pick was second well done Anderson .. Oh and Nasri of course:)

I'm quite surprised at how badly the youngsters XI have done, I would have thought they could have at least finished mid table.

great update thought would be higger then 19th

sunderland 6th

KUTGW

how about at end of all the team you see how they do vs each other

19th Nasri though <3

kutgw mate, what have you planned for the next award?

19th Nasri though <3

kutgw mate, what have you planned for the next award?

It will be Manager Of The Year. The basic idea will be to put each manager in the job of the, on paper, worst team in the league (Stoke), give them a decent budget and then give them 4 months in the job. I might use a points system for this i.e 5 points for a signing with a rating of above 7.00. Might start this tonight actually.

MILTON: Now, for our next award we are going to decide who really is the best manager at this moment. The question that is often discussed by experts & fans alike is, could any old average Joe step into a big club and do well? However, we believe we have the solution. Now for the format.

(Rooms darkens as VT begins to roll.)

The Format: The basic format for Manager Of The Year is as follows. The Premier Leagues top 7 managers & a wildcard will each take charge of Hull City for 3 months of The Premier League season. However, the judging system now differs from other awards. A points system has been created. Points will be awarded as following:

20-18 place (5 Points)

17-14 (10 Points)

13-10(15 Points)

9-7(20 Points)

6-5(25 Points)

4-1(30 Points)

Alternatively Points Will Be Awarded For:

Signing with a rating of over 7.00 (10 Points)

Creating a profit of of over £4 million (15 Points)

Winning A Manager Of The Month Award (10 Points)

If a manager is sacked, he will be instantly disqualified. With the rules explained, it’s now time to cross back over to Milton and find out who will be competing for this prestigious prize.

(SCREEN GOES BLANK, MILTON RETURNS)

MILTON: Well, with the rules explained, lets find out the candidates

Alex Ferguson: Age 67

Clubs Managed :St Mirren, Aberdeen, Scotland, Man United

Arguably the greatest of all time, Fergusons record in 23 years at United has surpassed anything achieved by a single person in the game. Will be looking to bring the magic touch to Hull

Arsene Wenger :Age 59

Clubs Managed: Nancy, Monaco, Nagoya, Arsenal

Although little known when arriving in England, Wenger soon set his mark on the game turning a dull Arsenal into a young, football playing side. A tactical genius who has achieved so much with so little money

Rafa Benitez: Age 49

Clubs Managed: Real Valladoid, Osasuna, Tenerife, Valencia, Liverpool

The man who brought the European Cup back to Liverpool, Benitez has since failed to win major silverware, but came the closest yet, finishing second in The Premier League .

Martin O’Neill: Age 57

Clubs Managed: Grantham Town, Wycombe Wanderers, Norwich City, Leicester City, Celtic, Aston Villa

A pupil of Brian Clough, O’Neill famously runs down his contract rather than resigning, which takes real loyalty. Led Leicester to League Cup glory, and was even more successful at Celtic, where he won the League on 3 occasions and was unlucky not to take the UEFA cup home with him. Now at Villa, he has created an exciting, young side that came the closest of anyone to breaking into the Top 4 Stronghold.

David Moyes :Age 46

Clubs Managed: Preston North End, Everton

David Moyes has done a fantastic job at Everton, and despite the lack of silverware, this is no understatement. Working on a shoestring budget, Moyes has turned lower league players such as Lescott, Jagielka & Cahill and has turned them into Premiership stars and Everton have finished 5th 3 times during Moyes tenure. A super manager, who if given the resources, could turn a team into world beaters

Roy Hodgson: Age 62

Teams Managed: Malmo, Switzerland, Inter, Blackburn, Udinese, Fulham

Returned to England with Fulham and performed the great escape with a team looking dead certs for 2nd tier football. The season later, Hodgson led Fulham to 7th and earned praise for a rock solid defence.

The Wildcard:

Owen Coyle: Age 43

Teams Managed: Falkirk, St Johnstone, Burnley

Has stunned everyone by taking his football-playing Burnley to the big time. However, how will he fare with a Hull side that is not his?

Lets find out who will win manager of the year!!....

boooo no sunderland

Will be very interesting. Excellent experiment so far, KUTGW

boooo no sunderland

I'm a Sunderland fan, but let's face it. Brucie & Sbragia aren't good enough (yet) to make it into the top 6 in the league.

hehe nope

should be in

The Wildcard:

Owen Coyle: Age 43

Teams Managed: Falkirk, St Johnstone, Burnley

Has stunned everyone by taking his football-playing Burnley to the big time. However, how will he fare with a Hull side that is not his?

I think Wenger will win this one.

I think Wenger will win this one.

I think the same. i almost never manage to beat Wenger on FM, even with most of his best players out and me at home

will be followiing...

What about Harry?:confused:

Wenger ftw

It could be said that there could not be a better manager to set the benchmark for our experiment, something that all United fans would certainly agree with.

Ferguson quickly gets into the groove, strengthening his side with a number of squa players: Elliot Ward of Coventry, Luis Prieto, Aaron Mokoena, Last season's FA Cup hero Nwakano Kanu and little known Korean Song Choong-Goog. Whilst these players are hardly world-beaters, they are dependable back-ups if Ferguson needs them. He makes a great start too, with a 1-0 win over city thanks to a debut goal from Goog. Goog would get another winner 3 games later in a thrilling 3-2 win over Sunderland.

Ferguson's crowning moment, however, came against his arch-rival Rafa Benitez, when Hull bagged two early on and Liverpool never recovered. The results were respectable, their biggest loss being a 3-0 grilling away to Chelsea. Ferguson has performed extremely well and has Hull sitting in a safe 13th, 5 points away from the drop zone.

The big revelation, however, has been Daniel Cousin. The Gabonian has bagged an amazing 6 in 7 and lies atop the goalscoring charts. His rating of 7.03 wins Ferguson some extra points to his tally. The other player that scrapes Ferguson some extra points is Jimmy Bullard. The creative midfielder managed a rating of 7.00 rating. Impressive, having just returned from serious injury.

The table, as of November

The impressive Daniel Cousin

Alex Ferguson: Points Tally

League Position: 13th-15 Points

Players with rating over 7.00 (x2)-20 Points

Total Points:35 Points

Hodgson is an experienced manager who has travelled the world, picking up new techniques and methods along the way. At Fulham, he has combined them all to create a team built from the back with a strong midfield. It will be interesting to see how he fares against the managerial giants of today.

Hodgson has spent less than Fergie, though he did follow him in signing the popular Luis Prieto on loan along with Tottenham flop Ricardo Rocha, who also joined on loan. High-rated Bristol City full-back Bradley Orr was his only permanent signing for a fee of £1million.

Hodgson started well, getting one over against his old club Fulham in the opening fixture after Geovanni & Fagan cancelled out Saviola's early goal.

Hodgson's best result, perhaps, was yet again involving Rafa Benitez, as Hull managed to hold out for a famous draw. The results were less sepctacular, but Hodgson managed to equal Ferguson with an impressive 13th place.

Unfortunately for Hodgson, his players didn't quite manage to capture the great form they achieved under Ferguson, and only Manucho managed to break the 7.00 barrier, something that would cost Hodgson dearly.

Hodgson's Hull finish 13th.

Roy Hodgson: Points Tally

League Position: 13th-15 Points

Players with rating over 7.00-10 points

Total Points: 25 Points

(BACK TO THE STUDIO)

MILTON: Well, Fergie holds a narrow margin but will any of the next 5 managers be able to topple him?Find out, after the break!

good update

KUTGW

Ooh, the tension

nice update...

Brilliant!

Nice updates mate Looking forward to Wenger now

Apologies for the lack of an update. Unfortunately I've had a lot of work to do, and haven#t had the time to write an update

A new update will be posted soon

Sorry again.